CHAPTER FIVE
In the apartment, Julia was sound asleep on our large brown sofa. She was right. The sooner we added some color, the better. We weren’t Noah. We shouldn’t have to live by his tastes. We needed to express our individuality. On the coffee table in front of the couch were numerous hamburger wrappers and a bag that smelled like there was still food inside. Leaving the wrappers alone, I draped a knitted blanket over my roomie, then went to the window and looked out across the city as I drank my beer.
It was past midnight. Like Noah, I was free to do what I wanted. I could return to the streets, follow the city lights like a moth. This wasn’t Milwaukee, where the breweries sent everyone home at the end of the night. This was Chicago. It didn’t sleep. It thrived in the night, and I felt its heat. The city called to me, seducing me more than Noah ever could.
But that was probably just the beer talking, and my need to distract myself from the seed of doubt Noah had planted in my mind about Corey. I wanted to believe it was another one of Noah’s tactics, but there was evidence that supported his claim that Corey wasn’t coming back. Corey knew where I was, or where I could be. He could contact the company to see if I was there. We could talk. We could, but we didn’t, because Corey hadn’t made the effort to.
Maybe he only wanted me when I was lost, I thought, taking a sip of the beer. And now I’m lost no more.
On the couch, Julia turned and slowly sat up. “Why does my breath taste like pickles?” she moaned.
“I think your darker side had a bit of a binge fest,” I said, pointing to the hamburger wrappers. “I wish I’d known. I would have joined you.”
She groaned. “I only order fast food when I’m drunk and alone.”
“You’re not alone now.” I sat on the couch beside her and offered her some of my beer.
“No way,” she declined. “I’m never drinking again. Until tomorrow.” She looked at me uncertainly. “Did Mr. Stafford talk to you about anything interesting?”
“Just the nanotechnology. I guess that means I don’t have to lick envelopes anymore, now that I have clearance.”
“Good riddance. I’d rather do the menial tasks. I don’t want to be the one answering calls. I want to be the one making calls. Until then, send the invitations my way.” She tapped the arm of the couch as if she was nervous. “He didn’t talk about anything else? Anything more personal?”
“No,” I lied, twisting the beer bottle in my hand. I didn’t want to tell her about Corey. Unwilling to confront questions I didn’t have the answers to, I preferred she believed Corey and I were just friends.
Brightening, she snatched the bag from the table and pulled out a hamburger, apparently pleased by my reply. “Do you want to split this?”
“I thought you’d never ask. I’ll take the side without the pickles. I hate pickles.”
“Good, because I love them. A girl can never have enough pickles.”
Famished, I tore into the hamburger, but as I ate, my mind kept wandering back to Corey. Maybe he had been but a mere daydream. Thailand wasn’t my reality. Eating hamburgers with a new friend, a new sister — that was real. My happiness couldn’t depend on Corey. I had to be happy now. I had to free myself from him.
***
Work the next day was fairly quiet. I was alone in the office. Noah was with Julia and his executives within the business development department at a lecture at the local university. Some Nobel Laureate was speaking. It would have been interesting, but I was excited to have the time to myself. With Noah silenced during the lecture, unable to give his input on what was happening in the company, there wasn’t much to do. I wondered if he realized how counterproductive his need to control everything was.
It gave me the opportunity to explore the building. Many of the projects within the labs were confidential, but there were a few I was allowed to see, including the nanorobotics, now that I had clearance. In the nanotechnology lab, men and women in lab coats peered endlessly into bulky microscopes. Because of their size, the robots couldn’t be seen with the naked eye, but next to each microscope was a hologram of what the scientists were looking at.
“I knew holograms were real!” I exclaimed. Busy with their work, no one noticed.
The robots were bulbous with hinged legs, like a cross between a squid and a spider. Their bellies were their brain, providing them with the information needed to make their repairs. At one table within the lab was a rat with a tumor on its side. I watched as a woman injected the rat with the robots.
“The tumor is natural,” she explained. “Mr. Stafford insists we only experiment on rats that are already deformed or diseased. It’s the only way we’ll know for sure that the robots will work on humans who are affected by injury or illness.”
“I dually believe it’s also his way of being philanthropic,” I stated.
“I agree,” she said as she measured another dose. “One more injection should do it.”
The poor rat was curled up, clearly frightened and in pain. “How long does it take for the nanotechnology to work?” I asked.
“A few days. You’re welcome to come back and check in on the little fella’s progress.”
“Thank you. I’ll do that,” I promised and returned upstairs to my office to read up more on the technology.
Later in the afternoon, there was a bang on the door. “Come in, Peter!” I hollered from my desk, recognizing the pattern of his knock.
“Special delivery,” he said, carrying a picnic basket in with him. “I hope you like chicken sandwiches and cheddar soup.”
I saved the paper I was reading and closed my laptop. “It’s my favorite, but something tells me you knew that already.” I stood and took the picnic basket from him. “That was very thoughtful of you, Peter. Thanks.”
“Don’t thank me. Mr. Stafford organized it for you.”
Ignoring how happy that made me, I invited Peter to join me. “Are you busy?”
“Not at all. With Mr. Stafford gone, there’s no one to attend to.”
“Then have lunch with me. The weight of this basket tells me you packed enough to feed an army.”
“Guilty,” he said, laughing. “Excessiveness is the trademark of an overachiever.”
We sat on the couches in the lounge area. “How can you do this?” I queried. “How can you be a butler? I know what you said about everyone having to start at the bottom to prove their loyalty, but you’re a kid genius. Isn’t it demeaning?”
“You’re a personal assistant,” Peter countered with a mouth full of chicken sandwich. “Do you find it demeaning?”
“I was desperate for a job. You probably have tons of opportunities waiting for you.”
“None that I want. I like working here. I don’t mind Mr. Stafford testing my loyalty. It’s a test that comes with great reward. One day, I’ll be head of one of the departments here, and that’s when I can apply my smarts. I want to help people the way Mr. Stafford does, use my superpowers for good.”
“You’re speaking my language, kid,” I said. “But you could have asked to be a personal assistant instead of a butler.”
Peter almost choked on his food. “No,” he said, his eyes wide. “I don’t roll that way.”
I was confused by his reaction. “Roll what way? You don’t think guys can answer phones?”
“Of course they can, but Mr. Stafford has a reputation… never mind. It’s not my place to say. I’m very happy being his butler. Let’s leave it at that.”
He quickly redirected the conversation. “Being a butler gives me a lot of free time. When I’m not attending to his guests or to him, I work on my PhD. In a way, I think that’s why Mr. Stafford asked me to be his butler. He doesn’t want too much responsibility on my shoulders. He’s trying to give me the time to study and to work.”
“I get it, but the rules we have to follow are absurd, don’t you think?”
He grinned. “I don’t know how you can complain. You break the rules all the time. How do you get away with not calling him sir?”
“I refuse to. He’s not a king.”
“He is here. This company is his kingdom.”
“Well, he’s not the king of me. I won’t call him sir. It’s wrong, and it’s weird. I’m friends with his brother.”
Peter wiggled his eyebrows up and down. “Good friends.”
I laughed and threw a piece of lettuce at him. “That’s none of your business, but don’t tell anyone.”
“I won’t,” he vowed. “I’m surprised to hear he has a brother. The Staffords are super wealthy. A few years ago, Mr. Stafford’s parents moved to New York after buying a mansion near Central Park, but they keep to themselves. They’re not in the public eye as much as Mr. Stafford is, but he only talks about his work, never his personal life. I’d heard a rumor that there was a sibling floating around, but I didn’t think it was true.”
“A twin brother, no less.”
His eyes went wide. “Do you think one could be the clone of the other? Or what if they’re both clones, and the real Stafford son is hiding away somewhere.”
“I thought the same thing!” I exclaimed. “It’s hard not to be suspicious when you work in a company like this.”
“What’s his brother like?” Peter asked, returning to his sandwich.
“He’s impassioned. In that way, Noah and Corey are the same, except Corey shouts his feelings out loud while Noah keeps his locked inside.”
“I’d like to meet Corey. Does he plan on visiting anytime soon?”
Looking down, I set my sandwich aside, no longer hungry. “I honestly don’t know what Corey’s plans are.”
“Julia is pretty amazing, isn’t she?” Peter asked, his eyes full of adoration.
“Peter, she’s like five years older than you.”
“Age is only a number,” he protested.
“I think it would be a problem for her,” I said, worrying my bottom lip, unwilling to hurt his feelings. “But I’ll help you find someone just as smart and beautiful.”
He accepted my offer. “I like Julia, but I also like redheads, like me. Do you think that’s odd?”
“Redheads are very attractive. I think it would be odd not to like them,” I assured him and picked up my sandwich once more.
***
“It’s as if the last year meant nothing,” Julia babbled as she stormed into the office, her bad mood evident in her scowl. She threw her bag down on her chair and paced in front of her desk, shaking her head.
“Did Mr. Stafford upset you?” I asked, hoping I didn’t make it worse.
“No. I upset myself. I should have known better. It’s time to move on. That’s for sure.”
“Sometimes his demands are impossible,” I said, trying to comfort her. “He expects so much from us, but he has so little to give in return, except for a healthy paycheck.”
She stopped pacing. “You really don’t know the full extent of it, do you?” she asked with what could only be pity. “I hope you never do.”
“Why don’t we get a drink?” I encouraged. “In a couple of hours, we’ll be finished here. Let’s go drink mojitos and dance our blues away. I have a great recipe for a Thai mojito. It’s made with lemongrass and—”
She cut me off. “I’m forbidden to drink. And so are you. It’s a new rule.”
My mouth dropped open. Closed. Opened again. “W-we can get a drink after midnight,” I sputtered. “We’re off the clock then.”
“No, we’ve been forbidden to drink at all. He doesn’t want either of us to touch it.”
“He can’t do that!” I cried. “Let’s be rogues. When we get home, I’m going to make us the best damn mojitos we’ve ever had.”
Julia pointed to the door that divided our office from his. “Are you going to tell him? Because I’m not. I’m not pushing anything until I’m out of here.”
“But you’re only moving to a different department. Can’t he still forbid you to drink?”
She looked down. “As soon as I’m in a new department, he won’t care what I do outside company hours. That’s the way the rotation works.”
“That doesn’t mean he has to be a jerk until you go.”
She sighed and slumped into her chair. “I don’t really want to talk about it.” She took a deep breath, composing herself, and then she flashed me her Work Julia smile. “Are you excited for the World Science Convention?”
“There’s not really anything to be excited about. I’ll be run around ragged.” I lifted my foot off the floor. “You’ll have to massage my flippers when I get home.”
“You won’t be coming home. Mr. Stafford, Peter, and you will be staying at the hotel where the convention is being held. That way, there’s no issues with transportation. You’ll be right there. Then there’s the gala. Mr. Stafford always takes his personal assistant as his date to the gala. People think it’s charity, those who don’t know.”
“You mean those who don’t know what a tyrant he can be?” I asked. “It’s no charity. It’s a mandate. Did you go with him last year?”
“It was in Rio de Janeiro, and it was amazing. Brazil is such a beautiful country. And hot.” For emphasis, she fanned herself.
“I guess I should start looking for a dress,” I mused.
“No need. Mr. Stafford will have a dress waiting for you in your room at the hotel.” Her eyes lit up, matching my mischievousness from before. “But we’re in charge of booking the room. I already did, before you arrived. The room is pretty boring because I didn’t know how awesome you are, but reservations can be changed.” Like a frog catching a fly, she grabbed her phone from her desk.
“Julia, what are you doing?”
She ignored me. “Hello, this is Mr. Stafford’s office calling. We’d like to change around a few of our reservations for the convention. Please upgrade Imogen Clare to the best suite you have.”
Anticipating disaster, I ran over to her and tried to grab the phone from her hand, but she was too nimble, sliding easily from my grasp. “Julia, no,” I protested.
Holding a hand up, she continued her conversation with the hotel. “Yes, your most expensive suite. I understand many are sold out, just give her what’s available. And make sure there’s a bottle of champagne waiting.”
Giving in to the inevitable, I whispered for her to do the same for Peter, which she did.
“Yes, that’s all,” she said gleefully into the phone. “That’s great. Thanks. Bye bye.”
“I can’t believe you did that!” I cried. “You are so scandalous. Noah — Mr. Stafford — is going to be so mad.”
“He probably won’t even notice. Don’t worry about it. You and Peter go have fun. It’s the least you can do for putting up with him.” Frowning, she suddenly went quiet.
“Julia, what is it?” I asked, gripping her hands.
“Nothing,” she said, a bright smile plastered on her face, but she remained quiet for the rest of the day.
***
Sitting in my daisy-covered hatchback, I flicked the elephant trinket tied to my rearview mirror. An elephant never forgets. I was like that. Unable to forget about Thailand or Corey. When the elephant stopped swinging, I examined a map of the parks around Chicago. The environment called to me. I needed green, and I needed water. Locating a park on the map that boasted trees and an antique fountain, I went.
Under a pink sky, the last of the day illuminated the park. Children had gone home to their dinners. Joggers had already finished their run. A few couples meandered the tree-lined paths with me, but the park was mostly abandoned. I followed the signs to the fountain, but when I reached it, my spirits sunk with disappointment.
The fountain had a simple elegance, reminding me of a stonework wedding cake, but it was dried-out and covered in moss. Shaking away the setback, I pulled a penny from my pocket. Wishes didn’t need water, just hope. I threw the penny in and listened to it clatter against the stone.
“You know there’s no water in the fountain,” Noah said, walking towards me in the fading sun. It was strange to see him outside in the daylight. He was like a vampire, remaining indoors during the day, only emerging at night. The daylight befitted him. It brought out a lightness in him that I wasn’t sure even he knew he possessed.
“I hate that you can track me so easily,” I complained.
“It’s not midnight.”
“I’m aware, but that doesn’t mean my privacy shouldn’t be respected when I’m not in the office.”
“I’m watching out for you,” he maintained. “You’ll realize it, one day. What did you wish for?”
“That you wouldn’t track me,” I joked.
He moved beside me so that we were shoulder to shoulder facing the fountain, like lovers planning their future. My heart racing, I pushed away the wish for him to wrap his arm around me, to take comfort in his strength.
“What else?” he asked.
“You don’t want to know.”
“Try me.”
I looked at him. “For your brother to return,” I said honestly.
“I see,” he said somberly. “Will you allow me to take you somewhere?”
“It’s before midnight. Can I say no?”
“You’re always allowed to say no. But this has nothing to do with work. It’s personal, and it requires a small drive out of the city. Will you come?”
Trying to read his eyes, I gave up and agreed. “I’ll come.” I was intrigued. Besides Julia and Peter, I didn’t know many people. I couldn’t give in to the attraction between Noah and me, but there was the potential for us to be friends. And we had Corey in common. That was important.
Leaving the park, I headed towards my hatchback, foolishly expecting Noah to follow, but he gently guided me towards the company car. “I know you’re adventurous, but I’m not. There’s no way in hell I’m getting into that rust bucket, not when we have a chauffeur.”
We drove, trading the city and its parks for open fields filled with herds of cattle that roamed as free as the elephants in the jungle. Passing through a suburban neighborhood with one street but lots of activity, we turned up a hillside and parked along a tall iron fence. Behind the fence was a country manor that stood four stories high. With its rose-colored stone, it would have been magnificent, but it was in disrepair. Weeds were overgrown throughout the lawn, and ivy had crept up the side of the old stone, prying some shutters from their windows. It was a beautiful sadness.
“Stafford Estate,” Noah revealed. “Our childhood home.”
“What happened to it?” I asked.
“My parents moved to New York, and Corey’s always traveling. I prefer the city, so no one comes here.”
I wanted to get out and explore, but Noah locked the doors. “I’m not here to give you a tour,” he said. “This is a lesson. The state of the place shows you how often Corey visits. He has this entire manor that he can use for himself, and he doesn’t.”
“And you don’t like that,” I observed, reading his tone.
“Of course I don’t.” He spoke as if it were obvious. “Our parents weren’t exactly hands-on, and the nanny who raised us died long ago. Corey is the only family I have that matters.”
“Then why are you so touchy feely with me? Why do you risk dividing your relationship further?”
He leaned closer. “Because I know with absolute certainty that he’s not coming back. He has never come back. He sent you to me for a reason, you know.”
My heart squeezed. I was so stupid. “Oh.”
Noah lifted my chin, forcing me to meet his eyes again. “Hope is foolish. It can rot the soul. Whatever promises he made to you, he won’t keep them. I don’t say this for my sake. I say it for yours. You deserve more than what my brother can offer you.”
“Like what you can offer me?”
“No, I can’t give you what you deserve either.” His speech was impassive, but his eyes sparkled with profound desire, captivating me, telling me everything he wanted to do to me. “I can’t give you a long-term commitment, but I can drown you in pleasure. If you agree to a year with me, a year where we remain loyal to each other, I will awaken your body in ways you can’t even begin to imagine.”
My insides pulsing wildly, my core betrayed my heart. I was tempted. The air in Chicago was different from anywhere else. Every time I breathed it in, I became a part of its heat, a secret fire that smoldered beneath its gray skies and blazed in the black of the night. Imagining the heat caressing my body, I was speechless.
Noah took advantage of this. Lightly brushing his thumb across my cheek, he held my gaze, ensuring I listened carefully to everything he had to say. The expensive cologne he wore invigorated my senses, made me want to press my body against his until I wore it too.
“We’re going to make another stop,” he told me. “Don’t be frightened. No one will hurt you. I won’t hurt you. Just open your mind and if you feel like it, let your body follow.”