While I shaved, I glanced at her naked body a few feet away in my shower. Her class schedule stopped me from getting in there with her. I was read the riot act yesterday when my, “just one more kiss,” led to fucking her against my apartment door and causing her to be late for school, yet again.
A slow smile spread over my face at hearing her singing Cake by the Ocean. On the parts where she didn’t know the words, I couldn’t help but chuckle when she filled in the blanks with her own.
“Stop laughing at me,” she called out over the spray of the shower.
“No way. It’s a constant goal in my life.”
“Jerk.” Unaffected, she resumed her off-key serenade. No one could make me laugh like she could, and most of the time she wasn’t even trying to. Just in the way she handled life with humor and humility made me envy her. On the other hand, no one could push my buttons like Haven could. Even before we started our romantic relationship, the woman knew how to piss me off like no other.
Since returning from our Valentine’s retreat a few weeks earlier, things have been fantastic between us when we managed to be in the same room. With her days filled with school as well as keeping my affairs in order, and my schedule working afternoons until late at night, during the week we had little time to play. It was finally Friday, and I looked forward to another weekend of relaxing. Saturday marked one month since we became a couple. I planned to take her out on a real date for a nice dinner, dancing, and then I planned to tell her I loved her. I was nervous, and I had no idea why.
Tonight after the show, my team would be hitting Old Man Gaffney’s for their weekly outing. I hadn’t been out with them in a while, and I wanted Haven to join me. I haven’t pushed her, but one month of hiding was enough.
Deciding to broach the subject, I dragged the razor over the last strip of shaving cream and called out, “Babe?”
“Yeah?”
“I want you to come out with us tonight.” The thrumming sound of water against the tiled floor filtered around my steamy bathroom. In the mirror, my eyes focused on her naked backside as I waited for a response. When none came, I asked, “What are you afraid of Haven?”
I watched her hang her head before saying, “I don’t know.”
Grabbing a hand towel, I wiped the shaving cream off my face and released the towel that wrapped around my hips. When I stepped close behind her, she leaned back into my chest.
“Talk to me,” I said, circling her body with my arms. As always, the smell of my body wash on her turned me the fuck on. Her warm skin beneath my touch prickled with goose bumps in spite of the warm water that cascaded around us. I forced her to turn, my eyes searching hers once we came face to face. She opened her mouth but hesitated. “What?”
“It’s too soon.”
“We’re together a month. It’s not too soon. And besides, it’s just a drink, Haven, in a public, noisy, crowded bar.”
“Right, in a public, noisy, crowded bar.”
“So fucking what?”
“Being a couple in front of Lizzy and Evan was different than having a drink with all your work colleagues.”
“I’m not asking you to put an ad out in the New York Times.”
Our eyes connected in a stare down. She pulled away and began washing her hair. “I need to get ready. Can we talk about this later?”
Pushing her would no doubt result in an argument, and I wasn’t in the mood today.
“Fine,” I said, stepping closer and placing a kiss on her lips. On my way out, I grabbed another towel and wrapped it around my waist as I walked into my bedroom. In an instant, the confidence I felt all week swirled down the drain. I tried hard to see things from her side, but it was still difficult to understand her hesitancy.
If the tables were turned, and I had been the one secretly in love with her for all these years, I’d want to scream it from the rooftops. Funny how I was thinking with my heart, and she took on the therapist role by thinking with her head. I just hoped she didn’t get so far into her own head she’d allow her insecurities to ruin a great thing.
We didn’t say much while we got ready for our day. I did kiss her goodbye when she left for class. But by the look on her face, I wouldn’t be seeing her later at Old Man Gaffney’s.
Doctorate degree or not, sometimes I never understood women.
Once I got to the studio, I spent the afternoon in my office scouring over the stack of psychology journals and publications I hadn’t had a chance to read yet. As I was immersed in an article that detailed the study of sexuality patterns in specific geographic locations, my cell buzzed on my desk with an incoming call. Patting the mountain of scattered periodicals and reports, I finally located it. On the screen flashed Haven’s smiling face.
“Hi, babe,” I said cautiously, not knowing if she was still mad at me after our argument earlier.
“Hey. So, you’re still hanging out at Old Man Gaffney’s after the show for a bit?”
“Yeah. I’ll just go for one beer. I should be home before—”
“I want to come,” she interrupted.
That was not what I expected to hear. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. I’m sorry about this morning. I acted like a bitch. But, I need to explain myself. Vaughn, my life is wound so tightly around yours it terrifies me. You know I worry if things don’t work out.”
“Haven…”
“Let me finish. I know you keep telling me to knock it off with the negativity. But you’ve been my best friend for so long, I know without a doubt losing you would be like losing a limb, a piece of me. These few weeks have been the best of my life.”
“Does that mean the best sex?” I prodded.
“The best ever.”
“The best ever, huh?”
“Can you focus, please? So my point is, now that I have you I don’t want to lose you.”
“Won’t happen. I’ll see you later, and we’re staying for just one drink. I need to give you more of the best you ever had.”
“Ugh, I regret telling you.”
The line went dead during my chuckling.
I watched at least six fuckers follow her with their gazes, and the entire time she had no clue of her attractiveness. Even when we were just friends, it would drive me nuts how unobservant she was regarding the line of drooling assholes she’d leave in her wake. But that added to her adorable appeal. Haven didn’t have a pretentious bone or a conceited cell in her body.
Her eyes darted around the crowded bar. A small smile played on her lips when she spotted me, and she quickened her pace. The closer she got, the more I gloated.
She was mine.
Even though she changed her mind and decided to join us, I wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to come out of our dating closet. My confidence grew when she stepped closer, and her smile widened.
“Hi,” I said hesitantly.
“Hi.” Still not knowing what she planned, she turned toward the crew and said, “Hi everyone.”
Daryl’s Haven radar kicked into gear, and he spun around smiling like a fucking fool. “You made it!” He handed her the Malibu Bay Breeze I had ordered, wordlessly taking credit for the cocktail.
“Thanks, Daryl. How did you know?”
The prick shrugged. “Lucky guess.”
“Haven!” Natalie, who already downed two shots and was halfway through her Chardonnay, flung her arms around my girl in a crushing embrace. “I was so excited when Vaughn said you were coming. I need another female to bitch to.”
Haven giggled at her enthusiasm, her eyes connecting with mine over Natalie’s shoulder. “Rough week?” she asked when Natalie finally released her.
“Awful.” My producer smacked my arm and growled. “I don’t know how you deal with him. He’s a slave driver.”
“Yes, he is.” Haven closed the distance between us, putting her arm around my waist and rubbing my abs over my shirt. Without conscious thought my arm circled her shoulders, and that was when I realized what was happening.
Haven was making her announcement.
“He’s lucky I’m so easy going.” She lifted on her toes and kissed my lips. Based on the way all eyes widened, and all mouths dropped open, I wasn’t sure anyone heard her. Their reaction caused Haven to laugh again. “I guess you haven’t told them, honeybuns?”
“I haven’t had a chance to, baby-cakes.”
If the physical affection hadn’t stunned them, then the sickly sweet terms of endearment were what did.
“Really?” Natalie asked, sliding her finger back and forth.
“Yep. Apparently, he’s been in love with me for years,” she said, flipping the story around. “At first, I thought it was creepy, but then I remembered he’s a shrink and can’t help his stalkerish-nerdy side.” Haven looked up at me and winked, causing an automatic grin to spread on my face.
Before I knew what was happening, Natalie yanked her out of my hold.
“I knew it! I knew the first time I saw you together your sexual chemistry was off the charts.”
Natalie dragged Haven to the bar, sliding on barstools and getting comfortable. The girls lowered their voices making it hard to hear their conversation.
Lifting my beer, my eyes connected with Daryl’s as he rocked his head back and forth with a scowl. “What?”
“Now that Carla dumped me, again, I was going to ask her out.”
“Oh, well. You should have moved faster. She’s off the market.”
“You suck.”
Before I could respond, a petite blonde walking past had me forgetting my train of thought. Confused by the way my heart bucked within my chest, my eyes cut to Haven who was engrossed in a conversation with Natalie.
“Dude, you look like you saw a ghost.”
“I’ll be right back.” I needed to put my curiosity to rest once and for all. If this was the chick that called me under the ridiculous Apple pseudonym, it was time to let the cat out of the bag.
My long legs strode closer until I was able to reach her elbow. “Excuse me.”
She halted and turned her head. There was no way she could have faked the confused look on her face since she had no idea I was approaching. It just took a few seconds for her brow to smooth and a smile to play on her lips. “Yes?”
“You’re Abby, right?”
“That’s right. How do I know you?” I wanted to answer, but she beat me to it. “Oh, wait. I saw you here weeks ago. You’re the guy who punched my boob.”
“Yes, that’s me. You can stop pretending, though. I know who you are, Apple.”
“Apple? No, it’s Abby.”
Her friends watched as this idiotic game continued. In case she didn’t recognize my face, I lowered my voice and said, “I’m Vaughn Lair. I do the sex show on Galaxy Satellite Radio.”
Again, the confused look on her face could not have been faked. “Um… that’s great? Sounds like something I’d love to hear some day.”
“So, you’re not Apple? You haven’t been calling my show asking for advice?”
“No. I’m. Abby,” she repeated like I was an imbecile. “I’m really sorry but I’ve never listened to your show. I do remember seeing your ads around town, though.” She stepped closer and placed her hand on my arm. “I also remember you owed me a drink for assaulting my boob.”
I barely heard a word she said. My head was all sorts of messed up. I would have bet money this was the woman calling me all these weeks.
“My apologies. I just thought you were someone else. I’m sorry to have bothered you.”
She flipped her hair, stepping even closer. “Are you here alone? I can ditch my friends.”
“Um… no, I’m not.”
“Oh, too bad.” She reached into her bag and produced a business card. “If things don’t work out, call me.” I distractedly glanced at the card with a slow nod. Her hand lingered on my arm as she stepped away.
What the hell?
I stood woodenly and watched Abby disappear into the crowded bar. By the time I finally turned back to my friends, Haven’s concerned gaze was pinned on me. She said something to Natalie, and walked my way.
“Are you okay? Who was that?” she asked. Noticing the business card I still held between my fingers, she dipped her head and read the name. “Oh.”
That was an all-telling oh. A—you’re still thinking about her, which must mean you can’t have feelings for me—oh.
“It’s not her. She had no idea what I was talking about.”
She studied my face with an unreadable expression on hers. “Is that why you look so upset?”
“No. I guess I’m just surprised. I was convinced it was Abby calling the show.”
In an instant, I could tell by the look on her face, she didn’t believe me. She assumed the worse, I felt guilty for reacting as I had, and the combination wasn’t good.
In fact, it was bad—so fucking bad.
She misinterpreted my silence. All I had to do was deny her assumptions, but I had no idea how to appease her doubts. Meanwhile, the air between us pulsed with a new awkwardness that I’d never experienced with Haven, or anyone for that matter. And after I allowed one full minute to pass, there was no fucking way I’d be able to convince her she was way off the mark.
I finally got my brain to work, and dug one hand into her hair to hold her gaze to mine. “Haven. I know what you’re thinking. It has nothing to do with being attracted to her. I’m just so confused now. If it wasn’t her, then who could it be?”
“Maybe someone at the station?”
“Maybe. This is going to drive me nuts, but please don’t misinterpret why. Okay?”
She leaned up and gave me a quick kiss. “I know you said one drink, but can we have another?”
My eyebrows shot into my hairline. Either my judgment was way off, or I underestimated her. “Of course we can, after you tell me you’re okay.”
“I am.” Her answer came swiftly. She stepped closer and linked her arms around my neck. “And, I’m sorry.”
She lifted up and pushed her lips against mine. It quickly went from chaste to definitely not appropriate. There we were in the middle of Old Man Gaffney’s, and my girlfriend was fucking my mouth with her tongue while my dick shamelessly sprung to attention.
“Haven,” I murmured into her mouth and pushed my hips into hers. “Maybe we should forget that second drink and go home, because you see those guys behind you?”
Her head twisted around before she met my intense gaze with a shy nod. “Well, in about three seconds, I’m clearing that table of their beer bottles, laying you on it, and then there will be no telling what I’ll end up doing while those fuckers sit around us and watch. This might be a good time to admit I’m into voyeurism.”
My words must have snapped her back to reality, or my titanium cock did. She glanced around us as her breath tumbled out in harsh pants. “Okay, maybe you’re right. Let’s go home.”