She leaves on Sunday. That gives me six more days with her. I’ve grown used to her being here. Sleeping with her in my arms at night. I don’t want her to go. I’ve rehearsed asking her to stay what feels like a million times, but I just can’t ask her to give up her dream.
I’ve thought a lot about what that means. If I can give up the bar, give up my family’s legacy to go with her. I’ve yet to come to a conclusion. I hate it and it’s not fair. I do know that I can’t do long distance. For a while, maybe, but that’s not what I want full time. I want her in my arms at night. I want to come home to her. Her stuff on the bathroom sink, her shampoo in the shower. I want to see the blanket she covers up with thrown over the couch, or her shoes by the door. I like the thought of her car parked in the garage. I want her life so entwined with mine that you can’t tell it was ever separate.
I just don’t know how to make that happen. Not without being selfish.
“Ready,” she says, stepping into the living room.
I let my eyes rake over her and she literally takes my breath away. “Yes. This is long overdue, don’t you think?”
She shrugs. “Not really. I like our life.” Her eyes widen and she backpedals. “I mean, I like us, you know, how we are. We don’t need all the fancy stuff. We’re just… us. I’ll take spending time with you any way I can get you. I like our quiet nights at home though. They’re really growing on me.”
“Me too, but it’s time I took you out. I want you to have everything.” I pull her into my arms and kiss her gently.
She slides her hands under my shirt. “Well, let’s go, country. Show me what this dating thing is all about,” she teases. Her hands slowly slide down my back and I can no longer feel her skin on mine.
“Come on, you.” I grab her hand and lead her out to my truck.
“Outback?” she laughs.
“What?” I ask, holding in my own laughter.
“Nothing, it’s perfect. It’s us.”
“I thought so.”
She shakes her head, wearing a grin as she climbs out of my truck.
“Bloomin’ onion?” she asks once we’re seated and have ordered our drinks.
“I don’t know, isn’t there a rule about no onions or garlic on date nights?”
“I’m a sure thing, Wallace. We’re getting the bloomin’ onion.” She winks.
“So when is Whit taking you from me for all the wedding stuff?” I ask, cutting off a piece of bread.
“Not until Friday. We have the rehearsal dinner, but you’ll be there for that.
“Not as bad as I thought. I was worried this week was going to be me sitting at home missing you.”
She smiles. “Nope. I’m all yours until Friday night.”
“Just until then?” I ask her. We’ve been avoiding talking about this, and we both know we need to.
“How long do you want me?” She’s going for humor, but I can tell she really wants an honest answer to the question.
“Is forever too long?” I ask, my eyes locked onto hers.
“Mike,” she says softly.
“I don’t know how we make this work. I don’t know how to do it without one of us giving up something, but I know I want you, so we probably need to talk about it. See where we fit, how we can combine our worlds.”
Her eyes mist over. “I want that, I just don’t know how.”
I place my hand over hers that rests on the table. “We figure it out together.”
She nods and pulls her hand away when the waitress arrives with our appetizer. She laughs and wipes her eyes. “Dig in, country. I’m going home with you tonight, remember,” she tries to lighten the mood.
I let her, keeping the conversation light the rest of the night. At some point in the next couple of days, we really need to talk, but this isn’t the right place to have that conversation. I need to be somewhere I can hold her close. I need to show her what she means to me. I just enjoy the here and now and the beautiful woman sitting across from me.
“Thank you for dinner,” she says when we get back to my place to watch a movie.
Snagging my hand around her waist, I pull her close and hold her. “I have an idea.” I pull my phone out of my pocket and pull up my music app, scrolling through until I land on the song I’m looking for. Kane Brown’s “Better Place” flows through the speaker. I turn up the volume and set my phone on the table. “Dance with me,” I say, reaching out for her.
Her eyes light up. “How are you not already taken, Michael Wallace?”
I hold her tight, my arms wrapped around her. My hand slides under her shirt and the feel of her skin calms me. “I was waiting for you,” I reply, pressing my lips to hers. I can feel her melt against me once my words register. It’s true. No one before her mattered, even registered on my radar. It’s always been and will always be her, no matter where we end up. I’ll never love anyone the way I love her.
“Jamie,” I whisper. She looks up from where her head is resting on my chest. I stop dancing and cup her face in my hands. Her green eyes mist as if she already knows what’s coming. “I love you,” I say softly before pressing my lips to hers, not giving her the chance to say it back. I don’t want her to feel obligated, and I’m not sure how I’ll take it if she can’t say it.
Pulling out of the kiss, she peers up at me. “Mike.” She smiles. “I love you too.”
I pick her up and spin her around. “Say it again,” I demand. I need to hear her say it again.
She laughs, her smile lighting up her face. “I love you.”
When I place her on her feet, she falls back onto the couch. I take a seat beside her and she surprises me by crawling into my lap. My hands grip her thighs as she leans down and kisses me. Her tongue tentatively traces my lips and I open for her. She’s in control, and I’ll give her whatever she wants. She doesn’t seem to be in a hurry and neither am I. She’s here in my arms, in my home, and she loves me.
Her hand slides under my shirt. “How often do you work out?”
I chuckle. “Anytime I’m not at the bar. I also help Aaron and Evan on the farm when they need it. It’s good exercise. Actually, that’s what I’m doing tomorrow. They have some fence that needs fixed, and Aaron is freaking out about not having it all done before the wedding.”
“Why doesn’t he hire someone?”
I shrug. “He has farmhands, but I think he likes to do it on his own. He takes pride in the farm.”
“I can see that. So tomorrow, you’ll be there and then the bar?”
“No, Liv is taking tomorrow, and I’ve been given strict instructions to bring you with me. Whitney says she needs your help going over last-minute details for the rehearsal.”
“What time do we have to be there?” she asks, running her soft hands over my chest.
Leaning up, careful not to push her off my lap, I pull my shirt off. She grins. “I have to be there at seven in the morning. You can sleep in if you want and come by later.”
“Hmm, that’s early. I guess we should skip the movie and get right to the final festivities of the night.”
“Did you have something in mind?”
“I did, actually.” She stands and begins to undress.
“Jamie, we can go to my room,” I say. I have a pretty good idea of what this idea of hers consists of.
“I think we’re good here.” She reaches behind her and unclasps her bra, letting it fall at her feet. “Don’t you?”
She’s standing before me in nothing but a tiny pair of pale green panties. “Y-yeah, this works.” She renders me speechless.
“You’re behind.” She points to my pants that are growing increasingly uncomfortable.
I stand and quickly strip them off, boxer briefs and all. I raise my eyebrows in silent question, asking her what’s next.
“Sit.” She points to the couch.
I do as she says, grabbing my aching cock and stroking. I watch her as she slowly pulls her panties down and steps out one leg at a time, kicking them to the side. Her long blonde hair is hanging over her shoulders, her green eyes bright with happiness.
She takes a step toward me. “Jeans pocket,” I remind her. She nods, picks up my jeans and pulls out my wallet, handing it to me. I shake my head. “You do it,” I tell her.
She grins as she opens my wallet and pulls out the little silver packet, using her teeth to tear it open. Dropping to her knees, she settles between my legs and I release my cock. She takes over, using long slow strokes. I watch her as she rolls the condom down my length. Hot as fuck.
Standing, she places a knee on either side of mine on the couch and straddles me. I grip her thighs again, needing my hands on her. Reaching between us, she grabs me and guides me home.
“Shit,” I mutter.
“Mmm.” She closes her eyes. I don’t move, not sure I’m even breathing while I wait for her next move. When she raises up just a little and then settles back against me, I close my eyes to keep them from rolling back in my head.
She’s taking it slow, and this need to make slow, sweet love to her overtakes me. It’s something I’ve never done.
“Baby, I need you to wrap your arms around my neck and when I stand, your legs go around my waist.”
She nods and I stand, me still inside of her. “What are you doing?” she asks, burying her head in my neck.
“I’m going to make love to you.” I take my time getting to my room. She’s moaning with each step and I like the sound, the feeling of her clenching around me. Finally in my room, I have to release her, which means I have to pull out as well. I sit her on the bed and slowly pull away from her. “Scoot back.” She does, and I follow right after her. Her legs fall open as an invitation and I take it. Dropping my elbows on either side of her head, I rest my weight there as I push back inside.
She slides her hands under my arms and grips my back, a move I’ve come to expect from her, as if she needs to hold me close, hold on while we make love. I might not have been slow the times before, but that’s exactly what it was. It could be nothing but when it comes to her.
“I love you,” she whispers.
Leaning down, I kiss her, soft and slow, my tongue meeting the rhythm of my hips as I make love to my girl. I lose track of time getting lost in her. Nothing else matters.
“I’m close,” she says, her green eyes locked on mine. “Can you… I mean, can you go with me?”
“I’m with you, baby. Always.”
Within seconds we’re both falling over the edge. I rest my forehead against hers and relish the feeling.
“Let me take care of this and I’ll be right back.” Reluctantly and quickly, I climb out of bed and rush to the bathroom to dispose of the condom. I’m back to her in a flash, sliding under the covers. She comes willingly as she settles her head against my chest and I wrap my arms around her.
“Love you,” she whispers.
I hold her a little tighter. “I love you, Jamie. Sweet dreams, beautiful.”