CHAPTER ELEVEN
LOU
I’m in the office on the south side of the house, working out some of the final details of my surprise honeymoon trip for Ward, when Calder stalks into the room.
“Good morning,” I say—though you’d hardly know it was morning, considering how overcast it is outside today. When I glance up and see his face, my fingers freeze on the computer keyboard. “What’s wrong? Is it Lily?”
We had a bit of a scare yesterday, what with Lily getting rushed to the hospital. She’ll be on bed rest for the duration of her term, but both mother and baby are healthy—or so I thought. Calder looks like he’s hardly slept. There are dark circles under his eyes, and he seems agitated.
“We need to figure out what Lily’s mother wants,” Calder says, jerking a hand through his hair. “It’s that woman’s fault that Lily is in this state.”
I lean back in my chair and glance over at Ramona. She’s in her playpen over by the window, and she’s pulled herself up onto her feet so that she can watch her uncle with wide, curious eyes.
“What does Lily think about this?” I ask him.
“She’s confused,” he says as he starts to pace in front of the desk where I’m sitting. “She’s upset, but she doesn’t want to hurt her mother. She feels guilty about the whole thing. She—” He stops suddenly and rubs the side of his face. “She still has emotional ties to the woman. I understand that. But if her mother is using her, or if she’s just going to hurt her again, then I’m not going to stand by and let that happen.”
Calder has never been the sort of guy to admit he might be wrong, or to stop fighting for his own way—but in this case, I think he might have a point. It would be all too easy for someone to take advantage of Lily right now. And I can’t exactly say I like our guest—tensions have definitely been high in this house since she showed up, and it’s clearly putting a strain on Calder and Lily’s relationship.
“Did you sleep at all last night?” I ask him.
He gives a jerk of his head and resumes pacing. “No. I can’t let this go on.”
“How’s Lily?”
“She’s still sleeping, thank God. She’s exhausted herself trying to handle all of this.” His fingers are in his hair again. “I’ve never seen her like this before. She’s going to kill herself with stress, Louisa. And I can’t watch her do it. I can’t.” He stops once more, spinning toward me. “What do you think I should do?”
He’s stopped right in front of Ramona’s playpen. Though he doesn’t seem to notice her, she smiles at him—she’s got her dad’s grin—and reaches up with a squeal.
I shift my attention back to my brother. “I think you should do what’s best for the both of you. But don’t assume that you’re the only one who knows what that is. Lily is a smart woman, even if she is dealing with a bunch of emotional crap right now, and her opinion matters, too.”
He shoots me a look that tells me that wasn’t the answer he wanted. Beside him, Ramona starts babbling, and he finally looks down at her, his face softening slightly.
“That doesn’t really help me,” he says, looking defeated. Forget Lily—it’s my brother who’s going to let stress drive him to an early grave.
“I never claimed I was an expert at giving sibling advice,” I tell him. “If you don’t like what I have to say, you can always ask Ward.”
He raises an eyebrow as if to say, Are you kidding me? before looking back down at Ramona. I love both Ward and my brother, but those two can be such big, stubborn idiots when it comes to each other. It’s like suggesting to either of them that they might learn something from the other undermines their manliness or something. Men.
Calder bends over slightly, offering his finger to the grasping Ramona. My daughter squeals in delight, her curls bobbing as she grabs it.
But though my brother smiles at Ramona, he’s still too rigid.
“What exactly are you so worried about?” I ask him. “Lily’s on bed rest now. You can keep her mom away from her pretty easily.”
“It’s not just that,” he says, straightening. “It’s more than just the fact that she upsets Lily.” Ramona whimpers and pouts when he pulls his hand away from her, then looks at me with those big eyes as if to say, Mom! Make my uncle play with me!
But Calder is distracted again, and he clasps his hands behind his back as he starts pacing once more.
“What else is it?” I ask.
“I don’t trust that woman’s motives,” he says. “I don’t think she’s here for the right reasons. Lily doesn’t trust her either, but I think she’s afraid to press the matter.”
I consider this. “You think she wants money.”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I think.”
“Has she asked for it yet?”
“No. But that doesn’t mean she won’t.”
I prop my hands behind my head. “The way I see it, there’s one simple way to figure that out once and for all.”
“Which is?”
“To offer her money. See how much it takes for her to agree to leave.”
“You mean I should try to pay her off.”
I can tell by his tone that he’s already been considering this option, but I suspect he’s trying to gauge whether bribing her is a step too far.
“You don’t actually have to pay her off,” I tell him. “Just offer it and see how she reacts. You’ll have your answer right there. Of course, if you take that route and her intentions have been good all along, you risk driving her away. And pissing off your pregnant wife, which is never a good thing. But you’ll have your answer, at least.”
Calder heaves a sigh. “I know. Seeing Lily like this… It’s worth every risk for me. I can bear her anger. I can’t bear her pain.” Though he looks away from me, I’ve already seen the shadows in his eyes. This pregnancy has really done a number on him.
“It sounds a little evil, offering her a bribe,” I say carefully. “But if it sets your mind at ease, then maybe it’s worth it.”
“All Lily really needs is an answer,” he says. “She needs to know once and for all whether she can trust this woman.”
“And if her mom really wants the best for her, maybe she’ll see that we’re only trying to protect her.”
Calder nods and gives his already disheveled hair one more sweep with his hand. “God, I hope so.”
“You’ll get through this,” I say. “Both of you. Lily is strong. She can handle a lot more than you think.”
“I don’t want her to have to handle anything.” Still, now that he’s made his decision, he seems to have calmed a little.
“Well, that’s not exactly how life works,” I tell him. “Now pick up Ramona before she starts crying. She’s going to throw a tantrum if you don’t pay her some attention.”
He looks back over at his niece, and this time the hint of a genuine smile creeps across his lips. “All right.”
He strides over to her playpen and bends over, picking her up into his arms. Ramona grins and cries, “Puh puh puh!” as he gets her settled.
“What does that mean?” he asks me.
I smile and shrug. “You’ll have to ask her.”
For a moment, he just holds her, bouncing her slightly as she babbles and grabs at his shirt. He’s almost smiling at her, but I suspect from the glint in his eye that he’s not really here—that instead he’s thinking about his own kid.
You have no idea what you’re getting into, Big Brother, I think. If he’s this agitated and distressed before the baby even gets here, then he’s in for a big surprise when he actually has a living, breathing human depending on him. The pregnancy is just the warm-up round.
“Oh,” he says suddenly, bringing me out of my thoughts. “I meant to tell you. I’ve made those inquiries about Taran Harker.”
I sit up straighter. “Have you heard anything?”
He shakes his head. “Not yet. But these things take time. And there’s always the chance that he doesn’t want to be found.” He pulls his collar out of Ramona’s hand. “I’ll make sure to update you if I get any news.”
“Thanks.” I lean back in my chair. I’m still not sure how I feel about finding our alleged half brother, but it looks like I don’t have to decide that yet.
We are going to be all right, I think. All of us. Just as long as my brother doesn’t do anything stupid.