It’s been a week since I officially became Sebastian Baxter’s girlfriend. I wish I could say that slapping a title on what we’re doing helped alleviate some of the unwanted attention I’ve been receiving, but that’s simply not the case.
I have learned to somewhat tune out the noise over the last few days. Sebastian was right when he said people will talk. I can’t control what they say any more than I can control the weather. So I’m trying my best to not let it get to me.
Obviously, sometimes that’s easier said than done, but being with Sebastian makes it bearable—worth it even.
When I let the outside noise seep in, I find myself uncertain of more than just our relationship. But all it takes is one smile from his lips and all of that just melts away. It’s scary how hard I’ve fallen for him—and how fast.
I wasn’t sure what would come along with being Sebastian’s girlfriend, but so far, I’ve been more than just a little surprised by him. I know he’s used to having sex, though we have yet to really discuss the details of his past, so I somewhat expected sex to be something he pursued harder. So far it’s been quite the opposite.
I’m the one unable to control myself, and he’s the voice of reason. On two different occasions now we’ve been alone, and both times he’s limited it to just kissing despite my effort to push for more. I don’t know what it is. It’s like when he touches me my mind goes all wonky and everything else just flies out the window.
Last night, while we were home alone in my bedroom, I was sure he was going to take things a step further, but as soon as the make-out session got too heated he made some excuse about a family dinner and high tailed it out of my house. I called him afterward only to have my suspicions confirmed—there was no family dinner.
“I don’t want to rush this, Tess. Sex is sex, and I’ve done it all before. I’m not looking for just another hookup,” he had said. “But I’m also a guy, and I only have so much restraint. Do I want to have sex with you?” He had laughed. “It’s all I think about—when I’m in the shower, when I’m lying in bed at night, when I was hovering over you in your bedroom and you were looking up at me with those big blue eyes. Fuck, Tess. You have no idea how much I want you. That’s why I had to leave. I don’t trust myself not to think with the wrong head.” Even remembering his words causes my skin to prickle.
What he said next affected an entirely different organ. “But you mean more to me than just sex, and I want to make sure you’re one hundred percent ready before we even think about crossing that line.”
I swear he steals a little bit more of my heart with every second that passes. I can’t help but wonder how long until he’s consumed the entire thing completely. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared. I’m terrified. But I’m also really, really happy.
Sebastian makes me feel things I’ve only ever read about in books and seen in movies. I didn’t know it was possible to feel so strongly about another person, especially one that I’ve only really known for about two weeks.
“Tess.” I hear Courtney’s voice seconds before my bedroom door pushes open and she appears in the doorway.
“Hey.” I look up from where I’m sitting on the edge of the bed slipping my shoes on. “I thought you were gonna call me when you were on your way.”
Courtney’s gone all out for tonight’s football game, wearing a white fitted t-shirt with Blue Devils printed across the front in blue lettering, her dark hair is piled on top of her head with white and blue ribbon sticking out everywhere.
“I forgot.” She shrugs. “What’s your mom doing home anyway?” she asks, knowing that my mom is usually at the hospital this late in the evening and was clearly the one who answered the door.
“They’re rotating her days off each week now. Apparently, it’s a new thing they just started. She’ll still be off on Monday, but the other days will be different each week.”
“I can’t remember the last time she was home on a Friday night,” Court observes.
“Probably because it’s never happened.” I snort, double knotting my shoe strings before standing. “So, how do I look?” I question, holding my arms out so Courtney can get a good look at me.
“Like a girl who’s never been to a high school football game before.” She laughs, shaking her head at me.
“Why, what’s wrong with it?” I look down at my red top and jeans.
“Well, for one the team we’re playing’s colors are red and black.” She chuckles. “Do you not have a Rockfield shirt?”
“You already know I don’t,” I state dryly, knowing Court probably knows what’s in my closet better than I do.
“Well, you can’t wear that.” She shakes her head, crossing the room toward my closet. She rummages inside for less than twenty seconds before emerging with a blue tank top, throwing the shirt at me. “Here. This is better than nothing. But I gotta say, Tess, if you’re gonna date a football player you might want to invest in some school apparel.”
“I’ll get right on that,” I answer in a way that says I probably won’t.
I quickly change out of my red top into the blue tank, holding my hands out again once I’m finished. “There. Better?”
“Much.” She nods in approval. “I’ve got some spare ribbon in the car. I can do your hair when we get there.”
“I don’t think that’s necessary.” I shake my head, looking from her hair to her face and then back again.
“You look at me like I’m crazy now, just wait until you see what some of the other students do,” she warns.
“Hey, girls.” My mom appears in my doorway before Courtney can say more.
“Hey, Mom.” I smile, grabbing the thin sweater laying over the back of my desk chair and draping it across my arm. Late August in Connecticut is warm, but some nights tend to get a little chilly.
“Just about time for the big game, huh?” She smiles, leaning inside the doorway, crossing her arms in front of her petite frame.
“It’s not a big game, Mom,” I object, hating how annoyingly excited she’s been since I asked her yesterday if I could go. “It’s just a game.”
“Ignore her, Mrs. W,” Court interjects. “It’s not just a game.” She pins her gaze on me. “It’s the first game of the season.”
“And…”
“And the first game is always one of the biggest, second only to homecoming of course.”
“I just can’t believe she actually agreed to go,” my mom chimes in. “Football games were one of my favorite things to do at your age. I remember we used to paint our faces and wear the most ridiculous outfits.” She smiles at the memory.
“Tess just needs to get there and see it all in action. I think she’ll really get into the spirit once she sees Sebastian out on the field. Money says the first time that hot shot quarterback boyfriend of hers throws a touchdown I won’t be able to get her to sit down,” she says to my mom like I’m not standing right next to her.
“I wouldn’t hold your breath,” I say, knowing that’s not likely to happen.
“We’ll see.” She smiles.
“Speaking of Sebastian, when am I going to get to meet him?” my mom asks as she follows us out of my room and into the living room. “Considering you’re not supposed to ride in a car with anyone I haven’t met, and I know for a fact he’s driven you home at least a couple different times,” she reminds me.
I’m honestly surprised this is the first time she’s mentioning this fact.
“I know,” I say, ignoring the way Courtney’s gaze sweeps to my face giving me a look that says—if she only knew.
Obviously, my mom has no clue that Sebastian has been here a few times while she was at work, and even though I feel bad for keeping things from her, I also have no intention of telling her.
“He’s really busy with football practice right now,” I add.
“Well maybe he can come over for dinner Monday,” She suggests.
“I will ask, okay?” It’s more to pacify her than anything.
“Okay.” She doesn’t push the issue, though I know this conversation is far from over.
Honestly, my mom is pretty amazing, and I think Sebastian will love her. And I’m certain she’ll love him as well. I don’t think anyone is immune to the charms of Sebastian Baxter, adults included. But I don’t want to put any added pressure on our still very new relationship, so if I can stall for a few more weeks then that’s what I plan to do. Lord knows I’m in no rush to meet Sebastian’s parents, though I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little curious.
“Here, let me give you a few dollars in case you guys decide to go out to eat or something before you head home.” My mom stops us just shy of the door, grabbing a twenty out of her purse that’s sitting on the coffee table before extending the bill to me.
“Thanks, Mom.” I stuff the money into the back pocket of my jeans.
“You girls have fun, okay.” She follows Courtney and me to the door, holding it open until we are both outside on the porch. “And don’t be home too late,” she adds on.
“We won’t. Love you.”
“Love you, too.” She blows a kiss. “You girls be safe.”
“We will.” Courtney’s the one to answer this time, waiting until my mom is out of earshot before adding, “Safe, but maybe not good.” She laughs, shimmying her hips as she crosses around her car to the driver’s side.
“You are so ridiculous.” I laugh, shaking my head as I slide into the passenger seat.
“You say that now. You just wait until you see Sebastian in his uniform. You may be a virgin still, but I don’t think you will be for long. Especially when you see how those tight white pants cling to his…” She gestures between her legs.
“Oh my god, shut up.” I smack her arm.
She laughs, throwing me a teasing sideways glance before taking off down the street.
***
Within ten minutes of leaving my house, we are walking through the parking lot toward the high school football stadium. Because I live so close to the school it takes no time at all to get here.
It wouldn’t even have taken us this long if it wasn’t for Courtney insisting she braid the blue and white ribbon into my hair once we arrived. And while I fought her every step of the way, I have to admit that the way she pulled all my hair into a side braid and weaved the ribbon through it looks pretty amazing.
My stomach flutters with nervous energy as we pay and make our way into the bustling stadium. The space is filled with classmates and parents alike, nearly every one of them wearing something Blue Devils related.
Okay, so maybe Courtney was right. I may need to invest in some school apparel if this is what my Friday nights are going to look like for the next several weeks.
Court weaves her arm through mine and pulls me toward the bleachers, but instead of going up into the stands like most everyone else, we stop directly in front of them, next to the fence where the cheerleaders are gathering on the track that wraps around the entire field.
“Court,” I say uncomfortably when I catch two cheerleaders specifically giving me a dirty look, one whispering something to the other.
“Don’t worry about those bitches,” she says loud enough for them to hear her. “They’re just jealous because Sebastian wasn’t interested in any of their skanky asses.”
God love Courtney. She’s so unapologetic.
“Oh, don’t worry, honey,” one of the cheerleaders, Sarah Brock, retorts. “I’ve already been there and done that.”
“Awe, good for you. So tell me what happens next? Because clearly, he didn’t care enough about what you were offering to keep you around,” Courtney taunts, slowly raising her middle finger to flip Sarah off.
“Courtney,” I grind out next to her, growing more uncomfortable by the second, “please stop.” I plead under my breath.
“You have to put these catty bitches in their place, Tess. Don’t let them walk all over you just because they’re jealous of what you have.” She says the last part significantly louder than the rest, but Sarah and the rest of the cheerleaders have now moved far enough from us that none of them heard her.
“Yeah, I’ll remember that,” I retort. “Where’s Bree anyway?” I ask, swiveling to look behind us.
The stands are packed full of people, but it looks like the majority of students have all congregated on the right side. And boy was Courtney right about what people wear. Tons of people have painted their faces or are wearing handmade shirts and hats in support of the team. Several boys in the front row don’t even have shirts on at all. Instead, their entire torsos are painted blue and each one has a different letter painted across their chest in white so that when they all stand together it reads BLUE DEVILS.
I never knew how into this people got.
“I talked to her a little while ago. She said she was coming with Blake. Oh, oh, here they come.” Courtney pulls my attention back to the field just as the football team erupts from the locker rooms, a blur of blue jerseys as they pass through the banner the cheerleaders are holding.
“Ahhh there’s Ant. God, look how hot.” Courtney sighs next to me, but I’m too preoccupied looking for Sebastian to really pay attention.
It takes only a few seconds to locate him and the moment I do, my heart goes haywire. He looks impossibly sexy in his uniform. I mean, he always looks mouthwatering, but seeing him like this—his broad shoulders accentuated by shoulder pads and his lean waist defined by tight white football pants. I have to use the back of my hand to wipe my mouth in fear that I might actually be drooling.
I watch him run onto the field, his helmet hanging loosely from his fingers as he circles back around and approaches the bench just a few feet down from where we’re standing. Like an electric current that singes every time we’re near each other, he looks up, his eyes finding me instantly.
I watch the smile spread across his face seconds before he’s taking off in my direction. I ignore the glares I know are being thrown my way from the cheerleaders who have reclaimed their position to my right and give Sebastian my full focus.
“You’re here.” He stops directly in front of me, the fence barely reaching his chest whereas I can practically rest my chin against the top.
“Where else would I be?” I giggle when he drops his arms over the fence and pulls me into his chest, my feet leaving the ground.
“Fuck, you look good.” He smiles, kissing me good and hard for the entire stadium to see.
Someone screams, “Go Tessa,” behind us, and I laugh against his mouth.
“Baxter, what do you think you’re doing? Get over here?” Coach Jones hollers.
“Uh oh. Busted.” Sebastian chuckles, pressing his lips to mine once more before gently setting me to my feet. “I’m getting my good luck on, Coach,” he retorts loud enough for the coach to hear him without ever taking his eyes off of me.
“You better get out there, hot shot,” I say, smiling like a damn idiot. I can’t help it. He makes me so happy I swear I feel like I’m going to burst open and rainbows are going to start flying out of me.
“Stay here. That way I can look over here while I’m on the field and see my girl cheering me on.” He tips my chin up with the back of his hand.
“Go. Fight. Win,” I say playfully, waving an imaginary pompom in my hand.
The way he smiles at me does more than just make my knees go weak—
it makes my entire body tremble. If melting were a thing, I promise I would be a puddle right now. Nothing can describe how it feels to have someone like Sebastian Baxter look at you the way he’s looking at me right now.
“Dinner after?” he asks, backing away from the fence.
“You’re buying,” I call back, blowing him a kiss just seconds before he takes off toward his team.
“You two are sickening.” Courtney fakes annoyance, reminding me that she’s still standing next to me.
“Shut up.” I don’t even attempt to wipe the smile off my face. I have a feeling it’s not going anywhere anytime soon anyway.