CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Natalia
The last week and a half, the Bar and Grille has been crazy packed. I don’t even remember the last time I had a day off. CJ’s Bar and Grille was featured on Guy Fieri’s show, and on Travel channel’s Food Paradise. In the last week, we’ve had more tourists come in to try out the food than we’ve ever had in a whole month. It’s been insane! To top it off, school has been taking up most of my time with the impending finals for the end of the semester. We have about a month and a half before the semester is finally over.
No more Luke Caldwell.
I’m trying not to dwell on it. I should be happy, but I’m not. I don’t want our strange friendship to end, but I know without a doubt, once this semester ends, I can say bye-bye to Luke.
I’m husting back into the kitchen with an arm full of dirty plates when I almost crash into Sam, who surprisingly looks a little frazzled.
“Fuck it’s crazy in here!”
“Tell me about it. My feet are killing me,” I whine.
“Can we take a break yet?” Aliza groans, popping up beside me.
“I fucking wish, Ohio,” Sam says. “That reminds me, Nat, I forgot to tell you your boyfriend stopped by today again, hoping to catch you for work. We actually had a decent conversation. Your boyfriend is pretty funny.”
I do my best to ignore the fluttering in my belly and keep a straight face for Sam. “He’s not my boyfriend.”
“Mmmhmm, keep telling yourself that,” Sam tosses over her shoulder as she heads back to the bar.
I roll my eyes and catch Aliza’s look. She purses her lips. “I’m not gonna even say anything.”
I groan and stalk toward the kitchen to drop off the plates and take out more orders. I don’t have time to worry about Luke or my friends, I just need to make it out of my shift alive.
By the time I walk into the apartment, my legs feel numb and my feet feel like I’ve been walking in twelve-inch heels all day long. I force myself to get in the shower and wash off the food smell clinging to my skin. I love CJ and all, but right now, I’m really cursing him for having such a booming business. I’m literally counting the days down until my day off. I plan to sleep all day and rest ice packs on the soles of my feet until the throbbing goes away. I wouldn’t be surprised if I woke up with blisters on my feet.
I spit a mouthful of toothpaste in the sink while simultaneously putting night cream on my face, when Sam suddenly starts pounding on the bathroom door like a complete psychopath.
“You’ve got company!” she yells in a singsong voice. I freeze with my toothbrush in my mouth, and rinse quickly. What the hell is she talking about? Yanking the bathroom door open, I’m greeted by a smug looking Sam, leaning against the wall.
“The quarterback is here.”
“Right now? It’s nearly midnight!” I look over her shoulder toward the living room.
Sam shrugs. “Whatever you’re doing to that man, keep it up.”
“I am not doing anything,” I hiss.
She arches a brow and smiles at me knowingly. My brows pull down and I pause.
I’m not doing anything to him, am I?
Sam walks away snickering, and I scowl after her retreating form.
I quickly look down at myself, assessing my appearance, and blow out an aggravated breath. Great day to wear my Hello Kitty pajamas. How very mature, Natalia. With a quiet groan, I make my way toward the living room where Luke is sprawled across the couch, clicking through Netflix.
“You do realize this visit is cutting into my sleep, right?”
“Sleep is for the dead,” he says, turning toward me. His eyes trail up and down my body, and he starts laughing. “God, this is priceless. Hello Kitty, Natalia, really?”
I walk around the couch toward the cushions and nudge him in the leg with my foot before plopping down next to him. “Shut up. No one is ever too old for Hello Kitty. Grown women have actual Hello Kitty tattoos, you know.”
“If you say so.”
“Why are you here, Luke?”
“I kinda missed you.”
“Aww. That was halfway sweet. Too bad I didn’t miss you.” Lie.
“Natalia?”
“Yeah?”
“Shut up.”
Laughing, I rest my head on Luke’s shoulder as he puts on How To Get Away With Murder. We finally caught up to season two, and we’ve been so hooked, we’re nearly onto season three. Heat emanates from his body, keeping me warm. Way warmer than I should feel resting next to a guy like Luke Caldwell. He smells clean—like he always does, fresh pines mixed in with the faintest hint of spice. I know my damp hair resting on his shoulder has to be bothering him, but surprisingly he doesn’t speak a word about it.
“How was work?” he asks while we watch the show.
I give a noncommittal shrug. “It was whatever. Work. Things have been so hectic lately. The Bar and Grille has been packed to full capacity. I’m looking forward to my next day off.”
He chuckles. “I’m sure you are. I knew I’d be left doing all the work for this project.” He makes a tsk-tsk noise, shaking his head back and forth. My lip twitches into a smile, and I elbow him into his rock-hard abdomen. He doesn’t even flinch.
“Shut up. We still have time. We’re almost done anyway.”
“I know. I just like messing with you.”
I tilt my head up to him, finding him staring straight down at me with a smile on his face. That smile and those dimples hit me right in my core. This silent moment between us does something strange to my heart, and my body—everything feels off kilter. Searching his face, I admire how perfect he really is. Smooth golden skin, chiseled features, and dimples that are deeper than the Pacific. He has a small, barely there, silver scar just along his chin. The imperfection makes him all the more beautiful. Realizing that we’ve been staring at each other without saying anything, I finally smile up at him, before turning back toward the TV. I could’ve sworn, in that brief second that I smiled at him, something flashed behind his eyes, I just don’t know what it was.
We settle into a comfortable silence and continue watching TV. After a few minutes, my eyes start to grow heavy, but I fight it. With Luke’s body heat and smell, I feel more comfortable than I should. He gently runs his fingers along my arm, and I struggle to remain conscious—to commit this moment to memory. The attempt is futile. I don’t even remember closing my eyes or falling asleep. Next thing I know, I’m alone in bed, nestled under the covers, and I don’t question it. I just burrow further under the covers, clinging to Luke’s scent and fall back to sleep with a smile on my face.
***
The next morning, I wake up to rap music blasting from Sam’s bedroom next door. What the hell? With a yawn and groan, I throw the comforter off my legs and force myself to stand. Stomping to the door, I throw it open and yell out to Sam.
“Turn it down, Samantha!”
I get no response, so I march to her door and bang on it wildly, yelling for her to turn it down. With sleep out of the question, I huff all the way toward the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for the day. I start work at four today, so I have most the day to myself since there are no classes today.
I purposely spend over an hour in the shower, then another hour getting ready just to piss Sam off in case she needs to use the bathroom. Much to my chagrin, she is still in her bedroom with the music blasting.
Rolling my eyes, I sidle up to her door and knock again. “Sammy! Would you lower the music already?” My irritation rises at her blatantly ignoring me. I knock twice on her door before opening it. It takes me while to understand what’s happening in the room before me. When my brain and my eyes finally get up to speed, I screech at the top of my lungs in horror. Or maybe its disgust. I’m not entirely sure. 2-Chainz blares from the speakers as Sam takes part in a threesome. I’ll never be able to listen to a 2-Chainz song without thinking about this moment. One guy is behind her, and the other is below her. The noises coming from them make me want to barf. This isn’t the first time I’ve walked in on something like this, but it’s been a while since Sam has had one of her “orgies” so I wasn’t mentally prepared for this. The guy drilling Sam from behind catches my eye and winks at me and I turn around so fast, I get nauseous, then slam the door with a resounding thud.
I practically run to my room, grab my purse and car keys, and start dialing Luke. Thankfully, he picks up on the third ring. I don’t wait for him to say anything, I immediately blurt out, “I’m coming over,” before I hang up. On the whole drive over to his place, I can’t get the images of Sam and her friends out of my head. I only wish she would’ve sent me a warning text message or even thought to lock her damn door.
Who engages in sexual acts like that, and doesn’t lock the damn door?
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Is the first thing Luke asks when I walk through his door. I drop down onto the couch and cover my face with my hands.
“You look like you’ve just seen a ghost,” he says with a chuckle.
“I seen sumting bery bisturving.”
“What?”
I take my hands away from my face and proceed to tell Luke what happened when I got up this morning.
“Orgies?” Luke damn-near shouts. “Jesus, Natalia, the guys don’t even do shit like that! Is Sam crazy?” he asks with wide eyes. “Is it even safe for you to stay there? Jesus.” He sighs, running his hand through his hair, and I manage a laugh. Like a real laugh.
“Calm down, Casanova. It’s her place too. I’m not going to tell her how to live her life. She’s my best friend. Plus, whenever she has company, I usually make an excuse to leave the apartment or study at the library or something. No big deal.” I shrug. “It’s been relatively calm lately. She was seeing this douche lawyer guy, so I don’t know what happened. I honestly wasn’t prepared. That’s all.”
“Wow.” He blows out a deep breath and chuckles. “I don’t know whether to feel bad for you, or actually laugh at you.”
My lip twitches into a small smile, and I roll my eyes. “I should actually be thanking Sam and her sex fiend friends. They’re one of the reasons I’ve decided to stay abstinent for so long.”
Luke’s brows shoot up in surprise and his mouth gapes.
“What did you just say?”
My heart freezes, and I momentarily forget to breathe. My eyes widen at my slip up.
Oh, shit. Did I just say that?
Crap, crap, crap!
“Nothing,” I blurt quickly, turning away from him. It doesn’t do much good when we’re both sitting on the couch. I really have nowhere else to run.
“You’re a virgin.”
It’s not a question. It’s a statement. Like everything is finally starting to make sense to him. Pieces to a puzzle clicking into place. I whirl back to him and point a threatening finger in his face.
“No stupid jokes! My virginity is important to me, especially with the way I grew up, so don’t try to make me feel like some loser or something.”
His brows pinch together, and he squares his shoulders.
“I wouldn’t joke about something like that, Natalia. Not many girls can say they’ve saved themselves for that many years. It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” he says sincerely, and it throws me for a loop.
So, what, no sex jokes? No ridicule? Who is this person sitting before me and what have they done with Luke Caldwell?
“Really?” His lip twitches at the corner, and I shake it off correcting myself. “I mean, I know that.”
He chuckles with a shake of his head and stares at me intently. Today his eyes are a forest green. The color is riveting. Unlike anything I’ve ever seen before.
“You are full of surprises,” he says more to himself than to me. I get that stupid flutter in my stomach, and heat crawls up my neck to my face. I drop my gaze, avoiding the intensity of his stare and the twinge in my chest.
Seriously? Am I seriously blushing right now?
“Yeah, well whatever, it’s not a big deal. Let’s forget about it.”
“What does your family have to do with your virginity?” he asks, ignoring my plea for him to forget I said anything.
“Well, you know, because the way my parents started, how I ended up living life without a mother, all because my father was selfish.”
“You can’t honestly think staying abstinent will change any of that, do you?”
“Of course not! I don’t know…I just don’t ever want to be the other woman, or the one left behind. I especially don’t want to end up like a sex-fiend.”
“There’s nothing wrong with liking sex, Natalia. It’s biology.”
“Having sex with anything that moves is hardly biology, Luke. You can’t justify having a lot of sex because it’s science. That’s dumb.”
“It’s not dumb. It’s a fact. Some people are wired differently than others. Some have low sex drives, other have high sex drives—like me.”
“Yeah,” I scoff. “And look at you. You’re the biggest whore on campus.”
“You may have a point, but that doesn’t make me a bad person. I just like having sex. Just because Sam likes having sex all the time, does that make her a whore in your book too?” he asks with raised brows. My face heats, and I stutter for something to say.
“N-no. What? No. Of course not, that’s completely different. I know Sam, and her reasons for having so much sex—”
“Ahh, so just because she’s your friend, she gets a free pass for sleeping around? What about me? Sounds a little unfair.”
I purse my lips for a beat while I process what he’s said, then blow out a deep breath. “Okay, you got me. You’re right. I just…I want sex to mean something more than just…sex.”
“So, you want the fairytale. Like those romance books you read.”
I roll my eyes because I know what he’s getting at. “I’m not asking for a fairytale or even a happily ever after. I know that isn’t real. I just want sex to be as important to my partner as it is to me.”
Luke stares down on me from his perch on the couch, and I take a minute to look at him. Like really look at him. He’s wearing a plain black t-shirt and basketball shorts. His light brown hair has gotten a little longer since we’ve started hanging out, the tips now hanging in his eyes. There’s an indent between his brows where he’s frowning, and his full lips are slightly parted. His hazel eyes—forest green blending into swirls of light brown, with amber flecks, a rogue circle of blue surrounds his iris—stare me down intently.
“Well,” he says thickly, “for your sake, I hope one day you find him.”
A small, tentative smile spreads across my face. “Me too.”
“In the meantime, if you ever need a willing participant, I’d gladly help you out.”
My cheeks heat, and I shift uncomfortably on the couch. Did he just say he wants to have sex with me? Rapid flashbacks of my sex dream bombard my brain. I clench my thighs together.
“That won’t be necessary,” I mumble, unable to meet his gaze.
“I’m kidding, Natalia. I have more class than to proposition you after you’ve just said you were a virgin,” he says with laughter in his voice. I scratch the back of my neck nervously and force a laugh.
“Right. Right. Of course.”
“Now, c’mon. We’re going to breakfast. I’m fucking starving.” Luke pulls me to my feet and drags me toward the door. My stomach growls just at the mention of food.
Good. Maybe we can forget this conversation ever took place. A stack of pancakes can fix this building ache between my thighs, right?
After two separate stacks of pancakes, Luke and I are resting against the back of our booth with our stomachs bloated from all the sugary goodness of our breakfast.
“You once asked me something about my dream girl…,” Luke starts off, prompting me to look up at him. “So, now it’s my turn. Who’s your dream guy?”
You.
“My dream guy? I’m not sure. Someone I can trust, and who can make me laugh. I want him to be smart, cultured even. He has to have a big heart and treat me like I’ve always dreamed.”
Propping his arms on the table, Luke drops his chin into his hand. “Have you found him yet?”
“What?”
“I mean, everything you just described, have you found all that in someone yet? Have you found him?”
My brows furrow, and I stare at Luke, not really understanding why he cares. Why would he want to know?
Shrugging, I say, “No. I haven’t found him yet, and honestly, I don’t think I ever will.”
His eyes twitch at the corners, and an unfamiliar look flashes across his face, but it’s gone within seconds, replaced with his crooked grin.
“Alright, Textbook, I’m gonna pay the tab, then we can head out.” He shoots out of his side of the booth, not even giving me a chance to fight him on paying for me.
The drive back to Luke’s place is silent, and I can’t help but think about his question earlier. He seemed really quiet after I answered, but why? It doesn’t escape my notice that the dream man I described is basically Luke, in a nutshell.
If only things were different.