Rachel called Vlad when she got home, biting her lip as she waited for him to answer.

“Rachel?” He sounded surprised and confused.

“Hi. Did I wake you up?”

“No, I’m just a little hungover. I drank too much last night…”

“Why were you drinking like that during hockey season?”

“Look, this isn’t the best time for us to talk.”

“Okay. When do you want to? Tomorrow?”

“No. Sorry. I don’t know.” He took a deep breath. “How are you feeling?”

“Better than you, probably. We need to talk about us, but it sounds like something else is going on, so maybe we should talk about that first.”

“You have no idea.”

“Then tell me.”

“I’d rather talk about us.”

“Okay.” She settled onto the couch. “First, I’m sorry for the way I acted and some of the things I said the last time we were together. I was angry.”

“At me?”

She shook her head even though he couldn’t see her. “At the world. The cancer, fate, my body… I felt so betrayed.”

“Has that changed?”

“I spoke to a therapist and she gave me a lot to think about.”

“Like what?”

She repeated some of the Ginnie’s insights. “But the main thing was, if my illness had been anything but cancer, I would’ve forgiven you and we would already be back together. While I’m still hurt by what you did, I can forgive you. I’m just not sure I can forgive myself.”

“For what? Getting cancer?”

She shrugged. “It’s not reasonable, but there it is. I feel like a failure, like this disease and my body ruined our future.”

He snorted. “Just wait until you hear my news.”

“No matter what it is, if you love me and are willing to try to rebuild what we had, it doesn’t matter.”

When he spoke again, he sounded utterly defeated. “I don’t know if I’m coming or going right now, honey. I definitely still love you, but I don’t have anything left to rebuild anything… I can barely look in the mirror.”

“Why? What happened? Talk to me.”

His voice was so soft she almost couldn’t hear him. “I know who my father is.”

“Who?” She was whispering, too.

“Anatoly Petrov.”

“What?” She was shocked.

“Not our Toli,” he corrected slowly. “Anatoly… A-N-A-T-O-L-Y. His father.”

“His father…” She struggled to wrap her head around this new information.

“His father had an affair with another KGB agent. They had me and gave me up because he wouldn’t leave his wife and she was afraid the child of an agent would always be in danger.”

“So Toli and Sergei are your half-brothers.”

“Yes.”

“But, honey, isn’t this kind of a good thing? I mean, not what your father did, but the fact you have two brothers. Real, blood brothers.”

“I don’t know what to do with that information.”

“Why do you have to do anything with it? Why can’t you just continue the relationship you already have and build on it?”

“I don’t know.”

“Toli isn’t upset with you, is he?”

“No, not with me, but this has hit him hard as well, knowing his father not just had an affair, but produced a child he abandoned.”

“He didn’t completely abandon you.”

Vlad shook his head. “Please don’t defend him. I’m not ready for that.”

“Okay. What can I do?”

He took a breath. “I know this sounds terrible, but…”

“You need some space.” She’d been expecting it, but it still hurt.

“I love you,” he whispered. “I just need a little time.”

“How much?”

“I’m not sure, but I’ll call you.”

She wanted to make him promise, to get some kind of commitment from him, but she had no right to do that, not after how much they’d been through already. She’d done what she needed to do and now he would do what he needed. All that was left was her faith that he’d come for her when he was ready.

* * *

After sitting up half the night thinking about Rachel, Anatoly Petrov, and the events of the last two months, Vlad finally got out of bed at dawn. He was tired, but sleep wasn’t coming at this point. He had breakfast and went straight to the arena for practice and a team meeting. The best thing for him right now was distract himself from everything.

When they were finished for the day, he stopped Toli in the parking lot, the awkwardness between them new and distinctly uncomfortable.

“Can we go somewhere and talk?” he asked.

“Of course.” Toli met his eyes. “I don’t want things to be weird between us. You were already like a brother to me. This new development doesn’t have to change anything.”

“I hope not.”

“Let’s go back to my house,” Toli said. “We can sit outside on the patio and talk.”

“Okay.”

Vlad followed him back to the house and they spent a few minutes chatting with Tessa before she disappeared. Toli grabbed two beers, handed one to Vlad, and led him outside. Toli took a swig as he sank into a chair and Vlad followed suit, neither of them talking at first.

“Have you talked to your dad?” Vlad asked.

“No. I don’t trust that his phone isn’t compromised, and he knows I’m never going back to Russia. I’ve applied to become an American citizen since both my wife and now two of my children are born here.”

“I don’t have that option.”

“Of course you do.”

“I don’t know what’s happening with Rachel and I.”

“Why? I heard she wanted to see you.”

Vlad scowled. “And I blew her off.”

“Why?”

“I don’t fucking know.”

“You two are a hot mess.”

“I know.”

“You worked so hard to win her back and now you’ve randomly changed your mind?”

“It wasn’t random. She needed time and now, so do I.”

“What, exactly, is so bad you needed to hurt her again?”

“What are you talking about?” Vlad scowled at him. “I didn’t hurt her. I told her I loved her and explained everything that’s happened. I told her I’d call after I got my head out of my ass.”

“When?”

“I don’t know.”

“So you did hurt her a little, whether she said so or not.”

“Is this you playing big brother?”

“Dude. I was your big brother long before we got that DNA test.”

Vlad cut his eyes to him. “What are you talking about?”

“Who did you text the night you met Rachel, asking for advice about how to treat a girl? Your best friend Brock, or me?”

Vlad sighed. “You speak Russian and I hadn’t yet—”

“Who explained to you the difference between making love and fucking, even though you’ve probably been with as many women as I have?”

“You, but—”

“Who took a big-ass risk to ask my father a question we both knew I shouldn’t have asked?”

This time Vlad swallowed hard and looked away, silent.

“And who took care of this fucking DNA test to figure out the riddle of your past?”

“You did.” Vlad raised his head and looked at him as if for the first time.

“Who’s always been there for you, even before we were close friends?”

“My big brother.” Vlad felt a sweep of emotion so strong he had to use his thumb and forefinger to press against his eyelids in a valiant attempt to keep anything even vaguely resembling a tear from escaping.

“We’re brothers,” Toli whispered, equally emotional as he looked at Vlad. “Real blood relatives.”

“Fuck.” Vlad stared back. “Do we look alike? We kind of do, don’t we?”

“Your eyes aren’t blue, but we’re both tall and blond.”

“We’re both athletic.”

“That we are.”

“What do we do? I mean, now what?”

“It’s going to be all right, you know. Our father has been throwing me curve balls my entire life, but this time it’s not a bad thing. I know it probably sucked for you as a kid and you probably hate him, yet look where we are. Look how he managed to make us a family without saying or doing anything.”

“Did he…” Vlad lifted his eyes, meeting Toli’s. “Are you saying he somehow…” He couldn’t finish his thought because it was so hard to imagine a lifelong KGB agent from Moscow somehow rigging the NHL entry draft.

“Did he somehow orchestrate your being chosen by the NHL? No, I don’t think so. He simply made sure you had every opportunity to be noticed. If you didn’t have the natural ability, it would have been out of his control. Once you showed the talent, he probably got you the exposure, talked to scouts he knew in Russia about you, who then talked to other scouts, and here you are. Did he somehow nudge the Sidewinders to pick you up during the expansion draft? Possibly. You were already on Coach Barnett’s radar. If you remember, Dom, Cody, and I got here early to have an unofficial role in the process of picking the new team. Because we knew him and because he wanted us on the team, he gave us that added incentive and you were on my radar as well.” He paused and then closed his eyes.

“What?” Vlad was watching him.

“You were on my radar because my father mentioned the hot young Russian player who’d been drafted but hadn’t yet played in the NHL.”

“I was drafted by Buffalo but because they weren’t sure if I was ready yet, and I didn’t speak any English, they allowed me to stay and play one more year on the national men’s team in Russia. I was supposed to go to Buffalo, but after the expansion draft, Buffalo told me they’d traded me and I was going to Las Vegas.”

“If my father had a part in that, neither of us need to know about it. All you need to know is he would never hurt us. Not me, not Sergei, not my children, and not you, either. He’s a tough, weathered old man, but everything he’s done has been to protect us.”

“It doesn’t feel like it,” Vlad admitted.

“No, of course not. You didn’t have the benefit of growing up with him, seeing him do the things he did to make our lives better. He and my mother purposely didn’t have children until they were in their early thirties because neither of them wanted their children to be in danger. Sergei and I were both accidents, and after he was born, she had her tubes tied to avoid anymore.”

“And then there was me. Did they not believe in condoms back then?”

Toli could only smile. “I didn’t think it prudent to ask.”

“So my whole life was orchestrated by some Russian spy who accidentally fathered three sons?” Vlad was pissed, and he didn’t know exactly why.

“I can’t make excuses for his choices, especially not the one where he got a woman other than my mother pregnant, but I can tell you he did what he did after we were born to protect us. I’m sorry you had to find out this way and if you’d prefer we ended our relationship, I understand.”

“Don’t be a dick.” Vlad made a face at him. “Like you said, you were my brother long before you were my brother… I’m not going to end jack shit.”

“Then what’s left to do?”

“Rachel,” Vlad said quietly. “What’s left is fixing things with Rachel.”

“Perhaps you shouldn’t rush things.”

“I’m not going to,” Vlad said quietly. “I’m going to call her and talk things out. I’m going to find a therapist, someone I can talk to, the way she did and we’re going to take a little time to fall in love again. Then I’m going to marry her.”

“Good plan.”