Prologue
Lennon
Freshman Year
My fingers absently strummed the strings of Cash—my black acoustic guitar—while I sat on my unmade bed, waiting. Black filled the backs of my closed eyes as I allowed myself to sink deeper into the music, into the muscle memory mixing with instinct to create a new sound. Something different. Something just for me.
The bedroom disappeared. Thoughts of the past week—the first week of my freshman year in high school—faded into nothing. I was the sound of the chords, the vibrations against my callused fingertips, the rich intrinsic sound that melted every thought.
Something warm pulsed in the center of my chest. A new sensation I couldn’t quite place, and in an effort to capture that within the chords, I focused. The concentration killed the loose, free-play moment, grounding me back to the present.
In my bedroom.
Where I could now feel I was no longer alone.
I peeled back my eyelids, gathering myself internally to switch back on from decompress mode.
The air knocked from my lungs like I’d been hit with a baseball bat.
The most beautiful girl I’d ever seen stood in my open doorway, wringing her hands, her black-rimmed glasses slightly askew. Her bright pink lips popped open and shut, clearly struggling for something to say.
I trailed my eyes down her body, taking in her Rubik’s Cube T-shirt, her ripped up jeans, and her worn-out Vans. Long strands of blond hair hung around her shoulders, half of it pulled from her face in a super messy knot secured by colored pencils.
Holy gorgeous.
That warmth? The thing that pulsed and thrived and begged to be acknowledged?
It was her presence. The mere sight of this girl was enough to trigger something inside me I’d never felt before—something I couldn’t possibly describe but instantly wanted to hold onto forever.
I finally swallowed the rock in my throat and loosened my grip on Cash, only now realizing I’d been clutching it against my chest. A barrier holding me to reality as the sight of her spun me into orbit.
“Hi?” I meant to say something cooler, smoother. But that’s what I came up with. I resisted the urge to punch myself in the face.
Her bright-green eyes widened before blinking several times behind those adorable glasses. “Jade.” She paired the blurted word with an awkward wave.
A full-on smile shaped my lips, totally uncontrollable. “Amethyst.”
“What?” The crinkle that formed in between her eyebrows was almost as cute as the way she took a small step inside the room, like the physical nearness would help her understand what I’d said.
I spun the guitar in my hands and hefted myself off the bed to set it on its stand next to the others gathered in the corner. I took a breath, wondering why the hell it was so shaky when I turned back around to face her.
“You said Jade.” I pointed at her, then pressed my hands against my chest. “I said amethyst.” I shrugged, shoving my hands into my jeans pockets to keep them from doing anything stupid, like trying to shake her hand just to feel her skin. “I thought we were telling each other our birthstones.”
She laughed so hard her nose wrinkled, and my knees damn near buckled. The sound was sweeter than the music I’d been lost in moments ago. She reeled it in, sucking in a sharp breath, but the laugh left those green eyes glistening.
“No,” she said. “I’m Jade.”
“Lennon.”
“I know.” She fiddled with the ends of her hair.
I arched a brow at her. “Jade?”
“Yeah?”
“What are you doing in my house?” I asked, flashing her a wolfish grin when she jolted at the question. “Not that I’m not stoked you’re in my room.” And damn if that wasn’t the truth.
She pressed her fingers against her forehead before motioning over her shoulder toward my open door. “I’m… Mr. Pryor is my Mathlete coach. I just made the team.”
Mathlete.
That meant she’d be practicing here up to three times a week for as long as she was on the team. I swallowed hard, remembering the discussion my dad and I had had earlier in the week. He’d cleared it with the school board, since our house was centrally located. He, a teacher’s assistant, and the team would practice here.
“Congratulations,” I finally said.
“Thanks!” Her smile was genuine and intriguing and something I knew without a doubt I’d never get tired of staring at. “It was beautiful,” she said.
I furrowed my brow. “I’m not sure I’ve ever thought of crunching numbers as beautiful, but I’m glad it’s your jam.”
She chuckled again, and I swear a firework went off in my chest. “No.” She pointed behind me, to Cash. “What you were playing earlier.”
“Ah,” I said, nodding. “Thanks.”
She pointed at the guitar next to my acoustic. “I love that one,” she said, her voice cracking slightly. “It’s like one big, red glitter bomb.” She instantly clenched her eyes shut, shaking her head.
A big, rumbly laugh burst from my chest as I glanced at my red Fender. It did have a glitter detail.
This girl. Damn.
I didn’t know how I’d missed spotting her all week at school, but I was instantly ready to remedy that fact.
“Jade, would you—”
“Lennon?” My dad’s voice cut me off, and he traipsed into the room. Jade jolted, spinning around to face him.
“Sorry, Mr. Pryor!” she blurted, heading toward the door. “Is break over? I didn’t mean to hold us up.”
My dad’s eyes jumped between us, but he gave her a smile. “No, you’ve still got a few minutes.” He nodded toward me. “Just coming in here to tell Lennon that a…” He tilted his head like he was trying to remember. “Jessica is here asking for you?”
I hissed, my eyes shutting as I raked my fingers through my long hair.
Shit. My date.
I’d totally forgotten I’d told the girl from my art class to meet me here tonight. That I’d take her to a movie.
Jade had made me forget everything outside of her smile, her laugh, the way she smelled like sugar and violets and something that made my mouth water.
“Right,” I managed to say, finally looking behind my dad and locking eyes with Jade. Something shifted behind her glasses—a mixture of understanding and disappointment.
“Nice meeting you,” she said. A finality shaped her features as she nodded, almost to herself, and waved to me before she turned out the door.
I watched her walk until she disappeared around the corner, a tug in my chest begging me to follow her.
“Lennon?” Dad used the tone. The one that he saved for special occasions, like when I stayed out after curfew or accidentally busted a brand-new instrument.
“Yeah?” I asked, finally returning my focus to him.
“Don’t.”
I scrunched my eyebrows together. “Don’t what?”
He motioned toward the open doorway. “Not her.”
My lips parted, but no words came out.
“Son, she’s a good girl. She’s not a girl you date for a week or even a month, or someone you date while dating someone else.”
I rolled my eyes. “Dad, I—”
“I’m serious.” He looked down at me before glancing at the guitars in the corner. “You have every right to play the field, rock star. But not her. She doesn’t deserve to have her heart broken.”
My shoulders dropped, my stomach sinking to the floor. “Damn, Dad. You act like that’s all I do.”
He gripped my shoulder. “I’ve seen too many girls crying in classrooms over you.”
I gaped at him. “That’s not my fault! They know I’m not boyfriend material.”
And that truth hit me over the head. I wasn’t. I made sure of it. Because I knew the second I graduated high school, I would be on the first ride out. Anywhere that would take me to a stage. On the road. Wherever. The last thing I needed was something holding me back. The girls I dated…they knew that. I made sure they did.
“I know, kid. And that’s fine. You don’t have to be. But Jade Aaron is already becoming my favorite student. She doesn’t need a distraction or a broken heart. Could you imagine? I mean, she’ll be practicing here for the next four years.”
“I get it.” My voice was cold, hollow.
I got it.
I wasn’t good enough for her.
I would only break her heart in the end.
“Thanks for understanding,” he said, patting my shoulder before heading to the door. He paused, glancing back at me. “You’re a great performer,” he said. “And an even better son.”
I gave him a fake smile, pretending like he hadn’t just crushed my soul. Not that I had any reason to be crushed…but damn it if Jade Aaron hadn’t captured my attention like a shooting star crashing into my atmosphere.
But even though I hated to admit it, Dad was right. Anyone could see from a single look in Jade’s beautiful eyes that she was a gentle, quiet soul. One who’d easily be torn to shreds dating someone like me—someone who dated often and practiced with the band even more. I’d never have enough time to give a girl like Jade what she really needed—a solid boyfriend who took care of her and put her first before everything else. Even music.
Just because I couldn’t pursue her didn’t mean I couldn’t admire her from afar. I’d keep my distance, but there was nothing to stop me from innocently befriending the girl who made my blood sizzle and my heart race with just the sight of her.
The sensation stormed my senses. I knew Jessica was still waiting for me, but I snatched up a pen and wrote the feeling down—a song, inspired by the green-eyed girl who’d stolen my breath.