Chapter Thirty-Eight
Trent
When I got the notice in my mailbox that my lease was almost up, I knew I had to decide what to do; renew my lease or move somewhere else. While I liked my apartment, I really hadn’t been spending much time there, so it almost felt like a waste of money, truth be told. I only slept here maybe one or two nights a week because I just stayed at Declan’s bigger, nicer place.
And okay, maybe I was making excuses because what I really wanted—really, really fucking wanted—was to move in with Declan. But I couldn’t exactly just invite myself to move in with him. No matter how badly I wanted to. Just fucking talk to him like the grown-ass man you are. I rolled my eyes at myself. I really needed to grow a pair and fucking talk to him.
I sighed out loud as I set about packing up some of the equipment for the night and began my internal check list so I didn’t forget anything.
After finishing up and saying goodbye to everyone, I automatically headed for Declan’s apartment. When I let myself in with my awesome jalapeno key, I found Dec cooking dinner in the kitchen, standing at the stove. So I walked over to him and grabbed the back collar of his shirt to pull down and kiss between his shoulder blades. “Hey, babe.”
He looked over his shoulder and smiled. “Hey, Jalapeno. I didn’t even hear you come in. How was work?”
“Fine, how was your work?”
“Good. I got the new client to sign with us, so it was a good day.”
I kissed his shoulder, then leaned against the counter beside him. “That’s great, babe.”
“Kade told me to tell you that he got an A on that project you helped him with.”
“Oh, good. He did a good job.”
Dec glanced at me a little worriedly. “You okay?”
I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. “I got my renewal notice for my apartment, but…” I sighed again. “I’m not sure if I want to renew it or not.” I bit the inside of my cheek and looked at the chicken he was cooking instead of at his face.
“When’s your lease up?”
“Two months. I have to decide in two weeks and turn the paper back in.”
“My lease is up in about three months, I think.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I was thinking about looking for a bigger place.” He added some spices to the pan.
“Why do you want a bigger place?” My heart started beating erratically in my chest, and I tried to tell it to calm the fuck down, it might be a coincidence, but the damn thing wouldn’t listen.
Dec glanced at me, then looked down at the food. “I was thinking… well, we don’t have much privacy with Kade being around all the time, so I was thinking that having a bigger place would help with that. And, um…” He sighed and closed his eyes before turning those baby blues on me. “I was thinking that maybe you might want to move in, too.”
A million emotions swirled through me, but most of all, I felt my love for him swirling around and wrapping me up. “Are you serious?”
He glanced at me again, suddenly looking nervous. “I mean, only if you want to. No pressure.”
“Ohmygod! Are you serious?” I yelled. “Of course, I want to, Declan! That’s why I’ve been stressed out. I wanted to ask you but I didn’t know how. And then I got the notice, and I was sorta freaking out because I just want to be with you all the time, but I didn’t know if you wanted the same thing. And I knew I needed to ask you. But I didn’t want to scare you away and I was—”
Declan cut me off with a laughing kiss on my lips. He ignored the stove and grabbed my hips as he kissed me hard on the lips and muttered, “We’re moving in together?”
“Yes… so much yes,” I muttered back before kissing him and wrapping my arms around his neck, pulling him in close. He stepped even closer, gripping my hips tight.
He suddenly lifted me onto the counter so he could step between my legs, so I wrapped my legs around him and let him devour my mouth. I moaned into his mouth, tasting all the emotions he was afraid to say out loud. But I could feel them, I could taste them, I could see them in his eyes. No matter how badly I wanted to hear him say the words, I knew I could wait because he treated me like I hung the fucking moon, and it was the most amazing feeling in the world.
I slid my hands down his back and pulled his ass closer so I could feel his hardness brush against mine. We both moaned and I thought I would die if I didn’t make him moan again—STAT.
“I want you,” I said against his lips. “I want you right now.”
He groaned and started kissing his way down my neck. He rutted against me and I moaned and dug my fingers into his hair.
“Goddammit, Kade’s home,” he muttered against my lips. I kept kissing him, still not wanting to separate. He reached over and turned all the burners off before whispering, “Hold on to me.”
“Huh?” I hummed, but still listened and grabbed onto his shoulders, wrapping my legs around his waist.
He scooped me off the counter and carried me, much to my chagrin—I muttered about how I wasn’t small and how he shouldn’t be carrying me, even though I didn’t try to get down—and he walked into his bedroom, kicking the door closed along the way. He laid me on the bed and covered me with his body, kissing me thoroughly while I writhed and rutted beneath him.
When I grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it up his back, he broke away long enough to yank it off and throw it to the side before stripping my shirt off, too. I ran my hands up his chest to his neck, pulling him back down to kiss me. I slid my hands all over his skin before grabbing his ass and dragging him to me, pressing our erections together.
I slid my hands under his pants and kneaded his ass, making both of us groan again. I seriously wanted his ass. Or I wanted him to take mine, I didn’t care, I just fucking wanted him, and I wanted him right the fuck now.
“Impatient, are we?” Declan chuckled, then stood up and stripped his pants and underwear off before peeling mine off as well.
“Hell, yes, I’m impatient. I need you to fuck me right now.”
He laughed, then grabbed the lube, throwing it on the bed beside me. He grabbed a condom, about to throw it on the bed, but I grabbed his wrist, stopping him, and he looked at me with a question in his eyes.
“Can we go without the condom?”
His eyebrows shot up on his forehead. “You don’t want to use a condom?”
I shook my head and bit my cheek for a second. “No, I don’t. Unless you want to. But… we’ve both been tested and we’re both healthy, so I don’t really see why we would need one. I haven’t been with anyone but you in the last year. And I sure as hell am not going to be with anyone else now. I mean, right? No one else?”
“No one but you, babe.” That wasn’t exactly clear. I’d known he hadn’t been with anyone since we started dating, but… he looked sorta serious all of a sudden. Maybe he’s been with someone. Oh god. I think I killed the mood… fucking great.
I bit my cheek again, then took a deep breath. “Have you? Been with anyone else since you were last tested, I mean?”
He brushed his fingers over my cheek. “No, Jalapeno, it’s only been you since before we even started dating.”
I blew out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding and nodded. “Okay, then. Good. That’s… that’s good. So do you want to go bareback, then?”
He smiled and threw the condom into the drawer. “Hell, yeah. I’ve never done that before.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I’ve always used a condom. Haven’t you?”
I wrinkled my nose. “Uh, there was one time in college when I didn’t because I’m a fucking idiot, and my boyfriend at the time convinced me to try it. Stupid, but obviously I’m lucky I didn’t catch anything from that asshat.”
He frowned at me. “That’s… not okay.”
I sighed. “I know. Anyway, can we, like, get back to it and stop all the serious talk? My dick is dying over here.”
He smirked, then lay over me again and kissed the hell out of me before moving down my body, using his mouth and hands as he went. I kept rutting up, seeking any kind of friction as he tortured me before he finally licked my balls, one at a time, then suddenly swallowed my cock all the way in one go. I screamed out and buried my fingers in his hair, trying to resist thrusting into his mouth. But then he pushed his hands under my ass and gave me the silent signal to thrust into him.
“Ohhhh fuuuck,” I panted as I thrust a few times. He slid a lubed-up finger into me, and I pushed back onto him aggressively before he added another finger. After a few thrusts with him sucking, using his tongue like a goddamn pro, and hitting my prostate with his damn magic fingers, I couldn’t take it anymore. “Please, Declan… I need your cock in me, like, yesterday.”
He pulled off and chuckled. “I love when you beg.”
I pushed his shoulder. “Shut up and fuck me.”
He laughed and grabbed the lube, covering his cock before putting it at my entrance. When he pressed in, I gasped and moaned and couldn’t stop myself from pressing down, trying to take more of him inside of me. I wanted him. I wanted to feel every single fucking piece of him.
He held my hips still and panted out, “You’re fucking beautiful like this.”
I was out of my mind, but still there enough to say, “Fuck off.”
He laughed a little and started to slide in a little farther. “You feel so good, Trent. I’ve never… oh god.” He groaned loudly as he pushed in. Feeling him inside me—only him without a condom was unbelievable. He held still for a moment, letting us both adjust to the new sensation. “I mean it, babe… you’re gorgeous.” He sounded breathless.
Whenever he said shit like that to me, it threw me off. I wasn’t used to people being nice to me in that way. I appreciated it, but I never knew what to say or how to react. But Declan seemed to understand how I was feeling, because he leaned down and kissed me gently as he slid the rest of the way in and held still to let me adjust. It felt incredible without a barrier between us; I felt so connected to him. I was full and it felt fucking amazing. Adding that to the sensation of him being so sweet and gentle with my mouth, I already felt like I was ready to explode.
“I need you to move before I die,” I ground out.
He smiled against my lips, then oh so fucking slowly pulled out and thrust back in just as leisurely. We both groaned at the feeling and he kept up his slow, sensual pace. I couldn’t decide if I wanted him to speed up so I could come or to keep doing what he was doing because what he was doing to me felt amazing, even if it was slowly shattering me.
I gripped his back tightly and thrust my hips against him. Declan wrapped his arms under my back and held onto my shoulders tight. It felt like he was trying to get as close to me as he possibly could, maybe because I was doing the same thing to him. We were pressed together, my cock stuck between us, he was inside of me, and yet, he wasn’t close enough. I felt like he’d never be close enough.
I could feel his emotions pouring off him, just like I knew mine were. I wanted to show him how much I cared, how much I loved him. I wanted him to feel my love for him, I wanted him to have no doubt that it was there and always would be.
Because I fucking loved him more than anything in the world—in the universe. And he deserved to feel that love. I wanted him to feel it.
I mumbled against his lips, “I love you, Declan.”
He whimpered at that and claimed my mouth again. I knew he was scared to say it out loud, but I also knew that he loved me. I could feel it in my soul. He was it for me, and I was it for him. I’d wait forever for him if I had to.
Not that I did, because I already had him. I could feel it with each thrust, with each kiss, with each caress. I could feel just how much he loved me.
When he picked up the pace just a little, I knew I wasn’t going to last. I pulled his hair and scratched his back in my effort to get him closer to me.
“Oh god, Declan, I’m gonna come. Please…”
He buried his hand in my hair and breathed into my mouth, “I got you.”
And that was all it took. I burst into a million pieces and came back together in a fiery pleasure that had me spurting between us over and over as Declan claimed my mouth and breathed in my moans and screams of pleasure. Declan’s body tensed over me, and I felt him shoot into my ass and I moaned again. He was filling me up, and I felt like he was claiming me. He’d said that he’d never done that with anyone before, so I was the only person to ever have this pleasure. It connected us on a deeper level somehow, or maybe it was the fact that we’d made love instead of only fucked. Because that’s what this was, making love.
My body was still spasming every once in a while, but I just kept clinging to him and holding him tight. He broke our kiss to bury his face in my neck and I tightened my hold on him. I never wanted to let him go.
“Trent,” he whispered, making my name sound like a plea or a prayer.
I brushed my fingers through his hair. “I’m here.”
“I know.” After a few minutes of just holding one another as his cock softened inside of me, he said, “That was…”
“Yeah.” I kissed his hair. “Yeah, it was.”
He tightened his hold on me and kissed my neck. We lay that way for a long time, although it wasn’t long enough because I never wanted to let him go.
I was never going to let him go because we were meant to be together. There was no doubt in my mind. He fit with me better than anyone, better than I thought possible. We fit together, and that was something I was never going to take for granted.
I kissed the side of his head again.