WHEN I HEARD the rocks crunch under the tires, I knew exactly who it was pulling into the driveway. His footsteps were quick as he rushed around the house, and I prepared for what I knew would be a battle.
“What the hell is this?” his voice growled as his feet appeared beside me. I’d been tending my garden, and I used the task as a distraction.
“Trev,” I sighed as I slowly stood and removed my gloves. It was a beautiful day, but I couldn’t really appreciate it. The sun and cloudless sky were no match for the storm brewing in Trevor’s eyes. An envelope that I assumed contained the divorce papers I’d filed was clutched in his right hand, and a mix of anger and hurt covered his face.
“Are you really ready to do this? Take it this far?” he held up his hand and shook the envelope at me.
“It’s for the best,” I murmured as I started to turn back to the garden. I didn’t want to face him. Trevor always had the ability to see past the bullshit, and I knew he’d see right through me.
“For who?” he grabbed my arm to stop me. “You tell me right now how pushing me away, ignoring your kids; the ones who are here, and completely cutting everyone that loves you off is best.”
Anger simmered deep inside me. It was one of the few emotions that I’d felt other than unexplained sadness over the past several months. “How dare you!” I yanked my arm out of his grip. “You have no idea what I feel like!”
“So tell me!” he screamed back. “I have no fucking idea what’s going on in your head because you won’t talk to me!” His breathing was coming out in pants and I watched as he yanked at his hair. “We’ve been together way too long to let this happen. Our son was in my office this morning because he’s afraid to leave his brother with you. He’s ready to give up a full ride because of this!” he waved his arms out as he motioned to me and the house.
“What?” I had no idea that Ken was even considering this.
“Yeah,” he nodded as he stepped closer and lowered his voice. “We’ve been through so much. Please stop doing this. I’m begging you. Let me come back home and let’s fix us. Please,” he grabbed both my hands and as he looked deep into my eyes I saw the first signs of what I was doing. A single tear crept out of his right eye and trickled down his cheek. Trevor wasn’t the type to cry, ever. Other than the few times he’d cried in the dark after we lost the baby, he’s remained stoic. “Talk to someone. We can go together. Something’s going on in there that’s not you,” he tapped my forehead and my anger came rushing back just like that.
“You think I don’t know that,” I volleyed back as I yanked my hands from his. “I know that’s something’s off. I know it, but I don’t know why.” I took a few steps back. “I’ve tried. I’ve done everything I know to do to fix this, but nothing’s working.”
“You need to talk to someone,” his voice softened as he moved closer.
“Like who? You?” I scoffed. “You have no idea what I’m feeling. You don’t even care?”
“Care? We both lost that baby, Shar. Just because I didn’t lock myself away doesn’t mean that I didn’t care. I couldn’t let it bring me down. I had to take care of you and the boys. You didn’t give me time. Did you ever think of that? Who would’ve taken care of you if I’d fallen apart?”
“That’s not fair,” I growled as I wiped at my eyes. I hadn’t even realized I was crying until my nose started running.
“I don’t’ know what you want me to say. I’m trying here. We had a great life. Everything we’ve ever wanted has been right here. We can have it back if you want it. I want it,” he mumbled. “Do you still love me?”
I was torn. Of course I still loved him, but it hurt so bad being around him. He was the reminder of what I lost and I didn’t know if I could ever get past that if I saw him every day.
“I’ll always love you, that’s not the problem,” I muttered as I glanced down at my hands.
“Will you talk to someone? For me, please? Give it a little time?” his voice shook and when my eyes met his I could see the pleading.
I nodded. “Ok. I’ll try. I’ll talk to someone, but if it doesn’t work, you have to let me go,” I murmured.
PROGRESS. WE WERE finally making progress. I didn’t know if it would last, but at least she seemed to hear me when I talked to her today. As I drove away, my anger fired back up on my way to my brother’s. He had been heading home when I last saw him, but I really didn’t care. How dare he join her side. He knew what I’d been going through for months now. He knew, and he was helping her make it worse.
When I pulled into the driveway in front of Tyler’s house, I didn’t even get out of the car before he was coming out the door. He’d changed into a pair of athletic shorts and a t-shirt. “I’m sorry, man. I tried to talk her out of it,” he called out.
All I saw was red, and knowing that he was helping her made me want to take his head off. “You son of a bitch!” I bellowed as I stalked up to him and took a swing. I must say, none of us have come to blows in years. Between Taylor and Tyler, Ty always knew how to get to me.
He stumbled back a few steps and rubbed his jaw as he chuckled humorlessly. “I’ll let you have that one,” he glared up at me, “but don’t you fucking punch me again.”
“How could you? You’re my brother!” I fisted my hands at my side. “You’re supposed to help me fix this, not make it worse.”
“I’m trying to help you, you idiot!” he growled. “She’s been calling me for days. These papers would have been filed months ago, if someone else had done it. I’m dragging my feet for a reason.” He tossed his head back and stared at the sky. “Fight for her.”
“I have been!” I lifted my hand to take another swing just as Mia stepped out on the porch.
“As much as I think Ty usually deserves an ass kicking, I kinda agree with him here,” she ran between us and threw her hands up.
“What?” Tyler scoffed as he stared at her.
“Your plans usually suck, but this time I think you might be on to something,” she smiled at him before looking over at me. “Just hear him out. He’s been plotting this out for you the last few days.”
My brow furrowed as I stared at them. “What?” Ty shrugged. “You’re my brother. The key here is getting her to agree with you.”
“Great,” I sighed as I shook my head.
“Why don’t you come inside and have a beer. You two can talk about it together, but no more punching things. I don’t want to have to fix anything you two break,” she wagged her finger at us as Ty rolled his eyes.
“Yes, Mom,” he grumbled.
“I heard that,” she narrowed her eyes on us before disappearing into the kitchen.
“Have a seat,” Ty motioned toward the living room before disappearing in the direction Mia had gone. I heard giggling and whispered voices before he reappeared a few moments later holding two beers.
“Did I interrupt something?” I lifted a brow as I took one of the beers from him.
“You can’t come over here and not interrupt something,” he snickered.
“So what’s this plan of yours?” I lifted the bottle to my lips and took a large gulp. I needed something to mellow me out. The anger from earlier was still bubbling right under the surface, and I had a feeling Ty knew it. Normally he would use it to his advantage, but I think after I punched him he may go in a different direction.
“I was talking with Gavin the other day,” he held his hand up to keep me from cutting him off. “I didn’t tell him it was you. Calm down, Bro.”
“I don’t want your friends knowing all my business,” I growled.
“Anyway,” he sighed. “Gavin’s parents went through something like this a few years ago. He gave me the name of the counselor they talked to. Here,” he handed me a piece of paper with a name on it. “She’s really good from what he says and it’s not far of a drive.”
“Thanks,” I shoved the paper in my pocket.
“You just need to convince her to go,” Ty pressed his lips together.
“I think I can manage that,” I nodded. “We talked.”
“Good. Now for the fun part,” he smirked. “You’ve got quite a bit of vacation saved up, right?”
“Yeah,” I let the word drag as it slipped out.
“Take next week off. I think you two need some time alone. The kids can stay with me or Tay. I’m sure he won’t mind. Hell, Mikey’s been there more than he’s been home lately.”
“What are you getting at?” I ran my hands through my hair.
“Morgan and Mia have been putting this together. They’ve got a romantic trip to the city planned for you. Between the four of us, I think you’re both gonna enjoy it.”
“I don’t think romance is the problem here,” I mumbled. I’d always been romantic. I did small little things for Sharron all the time. She pushed me away even though I tried to be there.
“I don’t think it is either. I think you two need to remember why you fell in love. I think you need to go back to before all of this,” he waved his arm. “You need to go back to before the cherry trees and life got in the way. You need to remember what it was like when you didn’t have a care in the world.”
“Since when did you turn into this…” I let the words die.
“Smart?” Ty laughed.
“I was gonna say sap,” I shook my head.
“You and Sharron have been together since I was six. You’ve been married since I was eleven. Other than Mom and Dad, you were my example of what marriage was all about. I’m marrying the love of my life soon. How am I supposed to believe it will last if you two can’t work this out? Despite what you think, I still look up to you, Bro.”
I stood there staring at him completely in awe of the words he said, and no idea how to express it. “You’ll make it,” I nodded. “She loves you,” I pointed toward the kitchen. Mia didn’t think I could hear her, but I could. She’d been listening to us the entire time.
“You will too,” he smiled. “Now go home and pack. You’re expected at The Plaza on Monday.”
“Ty,” I shook my head no.
“Don’t mention it. Now go,” he grinned as I turned to leave.
“Thanks,” I waved as I jogged down his front steps and back to my car.
This was gonna work. I would make her remember. We’d go back to before, before the cherry trees and life got in the way.