Nineteen
Leo’s hands glided over my shoulder blades, rubbing soap suds along my skin as the shower rained down on us both. I turned and his hands never lifted from my body, only finding a new place to settle on: my breasts. I sighed feeling his thumbs roll over my nipples. His palms slipped effortlessly due to the slick bubbles covering both of our bodies.
His gentle touch skated upward, cupping my neck, guiding me to tilt my head back under the water to douse my hair. When I straightened, I boldly reached out to him, grazing my palms against his firm chest. Though mild in comparison to all the parts of him I wanted to trace my hands over, the sensation of touching him sent lightning through my veins. Electricity coursed through me, colliding into a supernova at my core. Leo ducked his head and kissed the wet flesh of my throat, eliciting a moan. Chuckling against my skin, he let his hands begin to roam again.
“This is how I want every shower to be from now on,” he breathed. “Getting clean with a dirty girl.”
My eyes snapped open when I felt his fingers drift between my legs. So warm and soft, it threw me for a moment and Leo must’ve noticed the shift because he stopped short, never touching my pussy.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I just—you’ve never touched me there.”
I looked at the wicked grin formed on his lips and gulped, wishing I hadn’t reacted so his fingers could be inside me.
“You have a terrible memory,” he said with a laugh.
“Not with your bare hands.”
His eyes snapped to mine and I shrank inward under his surprised gaze. “You’re right,” he said. “I guess this is where we blur a line. I wear the gloves so you know without a doubt when I’m being your Dom and when I’m not…you understand that, right?”
I nodded. “Yes, but—”
His brow lifted and he waited for me to continue. His hands, however, kept moving over my body, rounding over my hips and sweeping gently up my back where warm water trickled down my skin. “You’re always my Dom, Leo,” I whispered. “And I don’t need to see the gloves to know the difference. I feel you change. I feel myself change. Gloves or no gloves, I’m always ready…and if I’m not, I know what to say.”
Leo’s expression had fallen as I spoke and when I saw him gulp, I began to pant. Silently, he traced a hand over my ass, around my hip, and down the front of my thigh. Instinctually, I widened my stance, allowing him access. He held me paralyzed with his electric blue stare as his warm and gentle fingers slipped along the slit between my legs. I huffed out a breath then sucked in another gust of air. The soapy water trickling down my body mixed with the wetness created by his touch, his voice, his every move.
As he pushed one finger inside, he stepped forward, causing me to inch back and lean against the wall of the shower. He didn’t wait for me to settle into the new pose before adding a second digit. The pressure shot tingles through my limbs and my eyes fluttered shut.
“No,” he whispered, putting his forehead to mine. “Look at me.”
I pulled my heavy eyelids open and stared into his eyes as he pumped his fingers in and out of me. My breath puffed against his lips and he tilted his chin forward to kiss me. His lips danced over mine but he pulled away, denying me the forceful connection I craved. Greedily, I reached out and dragged my fingers through his wet hair, coaxing him to my lips again. Leo complied, kissing me roughly but pulling his fingers out of me as he did. I whimpered against his tongue as he devoured my mouth.
“My way or your way?”
The twinkle in his eye and the ghost of a smile on his reddened lips weakened me. His way. Always his way. His way had changed me. It had revealed a new woman hidden beneath the surface. Leo’s way was a path into the light masked by the darkness of our shared desire. His way delivered me.
Carefully, I pulled my fingers from his hair, enjoying the intimate touch one last moment before lowering my arms to my sides.
“Yours, Sir.”
The second he flashed his teeth, my arms were over my head, pressed into the cold tile by a strong grasp. He held both wrists in one hand as the other pushed those two fingers into me, fulfilling the ache that had pulsed there a moment ago. His mouth claimed my neck and collarbone, trailing his tongue along my skin before biting down on my shoulder. Moans poured out of me as I catapulted toward an orgasm while his hand fucked me. My body began to shake, my core began to clench, and his hand left me once more. I nearly screamed.
Wide-eyed, trembling and on the edge of a cliff, I groaned while Leo licked his lips and stared at me blankly.
“Later.”
“What?” I panted.
He loosened his grasp on my hands, sliding his touch over my shoulder and down one arm as they fell. “You’ll come later. Until then, you can think about it the whole day. Every time you look at me.”
I huffed and dragged my hands over my face, clearing my eyes of water to get a better look at his evil grin. He’d doled out this kind of torture before. Once at the store after a quick tryst in the inventory room, he’d brought me to the brink then denied me release just for his own fun. The chuckle he let out as he shut off the faucet and opened the curtain was equally infuriating and adorable. He handed me a towel wearing a smug smile, then winked. I clutched the fluffy towel to my front, burying my face in it, still reeling from the sensation I could only describe as blue balls. Stepping out of the shower, I swatted his shoulder and his mouth dropped. Leo lunged and I squealed as he chased me out into the bedroom. Barely covered and still peppered with water droplets, I cracked a laugh when he caught me, gripping my hips roughly, tossing me on his unmade bed. He pounced on top of me, caging me in with his arms pressed into the mattress. My eyes grazed the chiseled muscles of his chest and I sighed when our gazes collided again.
A chill overtook me as he dragged one fingertip across my lips. “You make it difficult,” he said.
My brow flexed in the center and a tender smile bloomed on his full lips as he continued to stare at me. “It’s hard for me not to give you everything you want. But I know behind those little frustrated noises and that pouty mouth is a thank you.”
I gasped when his thumb began stroking me. “That’s what I thought,” he growled. “Wetter than before. Dirty girl.”
Tempting strokes at my clit had me approaching the boiling point in a matter of seconds, my breath stolen by his painfully slow caresses. “Tell me I’m wrong. That the denial—my control over your pleasure—doesn’t make you want to come just as much as my fingers do.”
My lips parted, sucking in a ragged breath. He wasn’t wrong. The gruff tone of his voice alone had the potential to push me over the edge. His eyes danced across my face wrought with agonizing pleasure. The hooded stare he wore darkened slightly as he pulled his hand away from my sex and brought it to my lips. I gulped as he pulled my bottom lip down with his middle finger before sliding it along my tongue as far back as it would go. The taste of my arousal, salty and foreign, rippled through my mind as I watched him watching me. He stroked my velvety tongue with his finger, drawing it in and out of my mouth as I closed my lips around it more eagerly with every stroke. His stare grew lustful and wildness consumed me, convincing me to suck deeply on his finger as he pushed it in my mouth.
A pulse at my thigh startled me and he bit his lip when I started swirling my tongue around his finger. His hard cock pressed against me as Leo lowered his weight on me. Weakening. He pulled the finger from my mouth, letting it pluck my bottom lip on its way down, snaking in between us. I followed his hand with my eyes and saw him wrap it around his dick. I licked my lips and I didn’t know if it was my attempt at a silent request or agreement, but either way, Leo noticed and quickly stood at the side of the bed. One hand gripped the back of my neck and drew me toward him. I pressed my knees into the mattress and spread them wide as I bent to reach him. Leo sighed as I took one moment to point my eyes up before closing my lips around his cock.
At first, I treated his length in the exact way I’d treated his middle finger, sucking deeply, swirling my tongue and pulling my lips tight with every retreat. But Leo didn’t let my control last long. His hand fisted in my damp hair and began to guide me, slow at first and then more wildly by the second. He glanced down at me as I looked up, lips closed tightly around his thick cock. Maybe he saw the smile in my eyes. Maybe he could tell my arousal had increased even more than before just by his powerful hand finding the back of my head, but he wasted no more time in getting off. I shut my eyes and loosened, allowing Leo to fuck my face as he pleased. He grunted and I reflexively swallowed the warmth spurting into my mouth as his tempo slowed and his grip relaxed.
I sat back on my heels, hands placed gingerly on my thighs, looking up at him where he stood panting. When his eyes opened and he saw me, submissive position, whisper of a smile on my lips, soft and sultry look in my eye and not a drop of cum left in my mouth, his brow furrowed and his eyes narrowed.
“Oh, what the hell. Good girls get rewarded,” he growled.
Leo swiftly pushed me back on the bed and a giggle slipped out of me. He yanked my knees out from under me, hoisting them over his shoulders. His face nestled between my legs and the second his heated tongue grazed my throbbing core, I cried out and my hands found his head. He laced his fingers with mine and held them firmly on my thighs while he sucked and flicked my clit with his tongue until I came.
A few moments later, my breathing returned to normal, Leo’s head on my bare stomach while his hands rubbed circles on my sides. My fingers drifted into his hair, twisting the strands, letting the comfort of satisfied silence fill the air around us. He shifted, placing his palm on my belly, propping his chin on it to look at me.
“Thank you,” he said.
I smiled. “You’re very welcome, Sir.”
A little noise croaked in the back of his throat and he climbed my body, settling beside me, rolling me on to my side to clutch me against him. He traced the curve of my cheek and I sighed.
“You thanked me yesterday,” he said. “What was that for?”
I swallowed thickly. “For seeing me the way I was meant to be seen. And for making me see myself that way too.”
His jaw stiffened as he caressed my cheek once more. “You are very welcome, my love.”
His utterance of that word, that soft and subtle title, made my heart seize in my chest. I wanted to say it but my lips didn’t open. How could I love someone I hadn’t known more than a few weeks? In the same moment I wondered that, I asked myself how I could’ve thought I loved someone for three years but never really did. Love was unpredictable. Spontaneous.
“I love you, Leo,” I breathed.
Our eyes met and every trace of authority cleared from his expression. “I—”
“Don’t feel obligated—”
He took my face in his palms, blue eyes wide and sparkling. He pulled my lips to his in the gentlest kiss we’d ever shared. Tears wet my eyes, suddenly overcome by the culmination of moments that had led me here and the silence from him now pounding in my ears. I gulped and tried to shake the desolation threatening to crash on me. It was okay. He didn’t have to love me. It was just a word. Leo pulled back from the kiss and stared at me, opening his mouth to speak just as his phone rang on the nightstand. He sighed and reached for it, letting go of me completely.
“Hey,” he answered. “Yeah, we’re getting in the car now. We won’t be late. Jesus, Oliver.”
He hung up and glanced at me for a beat, something indecipherable in his eyes. A huff fell from his lips and a smile morphed there as he darted toward the closet. “Boss man is freaking out about the Fall Festival. We’d better get dressed, okay?”
I forced a smile and nodded, hating how much I wanted to hear him say he loved me.
***
As soon as we found Oliver at the park setting up our table for the festival, he put us to work. Between staging books, making sure we had enough change, and spreading a giant pile of candy for people to take, I didn’t have time to think about Leo’s lack of response to my confession. The park looked amazing. The leaves had changed to beautiful reds and golds and though it was starting to get chilly, the sun shone brightly as people began trickling in for the festival.
“There they are!” a voice called out.
“Wonkle Leo! Wonkle Ollie!”
I recognized Barry’s tiny voice and his adorable mispronunciation. I turned to see him charging toward his uncles, his chocolate mop of curls bouncing as he ran. Leo crouched down and scooped him up just as he nearly barreled into him. I beamed, watching Leo settle Barry onto his hip, offering him a high five before setting him on his feet again. Barry darted over to Oliver, who squeezed him in a bear hug and swung him around rowdily.
The voice I’d heard before Barry’s holler must’ve belonged to the white-haired woman walking towards us holding hands with a man who very clearly resembled Oliver only with silver hair. She waved and Leo’s face shined with the most genuine smile I’d ever seen on his face. He moved toward them, closing the distance. The woman wrapped her arms around Leo and he hugged her back, gently placing a hand on the back of her head before kissing her cheek. I watched shamelessly as he hugged the man, clapping a hand on his shoulder afterwards. The three of them approached the table, talking in words I couldn’t make out from where a stood a few feet away. Leo caught my eye as I attempted to busy my hands, straightening the already pristine table thanks to Oliver’s particularity.
“Mom, Dad, this is Sloane,” Leo said.
I spun and felt a hot, red blotch bloom on my neck. Willing a smile on my lips, I said hello in a voice I barely recognized.
“Sloane, these are my parents, Kathy and Michael.”
I glanced at Leo, taking in the sweet and utterly serene look on his face before looking back at his parents who offered smiles and kind greetings to me.
“Where’s Marie?” Leo asked his mother as Barry zoomed past my leg making fighter jet noises.
Kathy made a face and Michael folded his arms before answering, “She didn’t feel up to it today. She’s at Oliver’s.”
“Of course,” Leo snapped. “She’s got four babysitters here, why would she come?”
“Leo!” his mother scolded.
I felt my chest constrict watching the intimate exchange among family, feeling more out of place than ever. Barry zoomed around one more time then stopped to dig through the Halloween candy Oliver had strewn on the table.
“Mom, don’t act like you’re not thinking it, too. When is she going to grow up?” Leo’s voice hit a volume that pulled Barry’s attention over and I watched his little face crumble into a grimace.
I shot Leo a glare I knew I had no right to offer and crouched down beside Barry. “Hey, remember me?”
His cherubic cheeks rose as a shy smile pulled at his lips. “Yeah,” he replied in a hush. “You’re Miss Sloane.”
“That’s right. You wanna go find some cotton candy with me?” His eyes grew into saucers as he nodded. I stood and he took the hand I offered him. Oliver eyed me with a lifted brow. “We’re going to walk around for a minute while Leo and Grandma and Grandpa keep talking,” I pressed. “You okay at the booth by yourself for a second?”
“Yep.” Oliver smiled and I could only imagine what he was thinking of my bold move. I gave a glance to Leo over my shoulder as Barry and I walked away. He met my eyes and a pained smile crossed his face as he nodded at me.
“So, are you in school?”
Barry glanced up at me and a flash of familiarity struck me. Sure, he looked a little like Leo and a bit like Oliver in other ways but there was something else.
“Preschool,” he said matter-of-factly. “I get to go to Kindergarten next year. And ride the bus!”
I laughed. “Very cool. Ooh look, there’s the lady we need to see,” I said, pointing to the little trailer that sold cotton candy, funnel cakes, and caramel apples.
Barry picked up the pace and dragged me along as I chuckled. We queued up in the short line and I looked down at him again.
“Two questions. One, are you willing to share some of this cotton candy with me?”
“Sure!” The smile on his face was infectious and it made me snicker.
“Thank you,” I said with a smile. “Now, question two—this one is super important—pink or blue?”
I expected a gut reaction answer of blue from the four-year-old boy, but instead his little lips twisted on his face and his pale eyebrows tensed. “Hmm. Blue turns your mouth blue, pink doesn’t,” he started his line of reasoning.
“True.” I held back a laugh.
“They taste the same…”
The people in front of us moved with their order in hand and we stepped up to the window. I gave Barry a questioning look and he shrugged. “Blue.”
“One bag of blue cotton candy please,” I said around a laugh.
Heading back to the bookstore’s booth, Barry held onto the bag, pulling pieces of sugary fibers off and handing one to me every time he took one for himself. I breathed in the autumn air and caught a quick whiff of coffee just as a familiar face came into view. Ethan Corbin from Black and Brew stood grinning at me from behind a table just a few feet ahead. I saw a sign in front of him that read Hot Chocolate and nudged Barry. He wasn’t my kid, I could sugar him up.
“You like cocoa?”
“With marshmallows?!”
“I’ll take that as a yes.” I laughed as we stepped up to Ethan’s table.
“Sloane, hey.”
I tucked my hair behind one ear, suddenly made anxious by his stare. Ethan hadn’t exactly been subtle with me, at least it felt that way. Maybe I was wrong about him, but the smile he flashed at me along with the way he leaned over the table as I neared didn’t feel like he was just being friendly.
“Hi, Ethan. Could we have two hot chocolates?”
The wink he offered was the last clue I needed. I forced a smile as he quickly poured two paper cups full, snapping lids on top before handing them to me.
“Who’s this?” he asked, smiling at Barry.
“This is Barry. Barry this is my friend, Ethan. Barry is Leo’s nephew.”
Ethan waved at Barry, who couldn’t be bothered to respond as he stuffed his blue lips with more cotton candy. I stood awkwardly for a moment and started to say a quick goodbye when he spoke again.
“And Leo, the guy from the bookstore,” he started. “He’s like your…”
“Boyfriend.”
My heart leapt in my chest hearing deep Leo’s voice over my shoulder. Ethan clearly hadn’t noticed him approach behind us and his face fell. I turned and my eyes landed on his stoic face, blue eyes blazing with something I didn’t recognize. Boyfriend. My head swirled with confusion and the admission of my feelings from earlier echoed in my mind.
Leo smiled down at Barry then slipped his arm around my waist, bending to kiss my cheek. A blush tinted me all over and I glanced at Ethan, who simply nodded.
“Right. Well, you guys have a good one,” Ethan said.
“Bye, Ethan,” I replied.
The second I turned and relaxed under Leo’s arm draped over my shoulder, I breathed in the scent of his clothes and smelled his clove cigarettes. That had to be about more than the looks Ethan gave me. Maybe it was the stress of Marie and the conversation he’d had with his parents. Maybe he was mad at me for saying what I’d said. My eyes tilted up at him as he led Barry and me over to a bench near our booth.
“Is everything okay?” I whispered.
He didn’t look at me as we kept walking, me clutched to his side and Barry’s hand firmly in his. “Yeah,” he said. “I just don’t like the way that guy looks at you.”
We reached the bench and I chuckled under my breath. Leo’s response of an intense glare gave me pause and I examined the strange look on his face. He’d always been intense but his eyes had never made me feel so small. For the first time, I didn’t see dominance behind that intensity. I didn’t see lingering lust and a hunger for play. It felt different. My stomach rolled but I tried to swallow the ominous feeling as he gestured toward the bench. Barry climbed up in between us with no assistance needed, though we both offered a hand. I gave him the little cup of hot chocolate that’d had time to cool and watched him take a sip.
Leo’s hand smoothed over Barry’s hair and it hit me—the reason he looked so oddly familiar to me. Barry looked like a memory. Sitting beside him with Leo, I remembered a long forgotten vision of a child I might have one day. A lost hope. I’d spent so long wishing for a future that looked like this moment. Only now, something strange and secretive sat behind Leo’s gaze, my feelings remained unrequited, and the child wasn’t mine—just like before.