That was enough of that. No more tears. I’d cried more in the past year than I ever had in my life. I scrubbed my cheeks, taking in the bare room with its single bed and dresser. I picked up my jacket and went back outside, knocking on Zanth’s door. No answer. From the noise, everyone remained in the square. I heard the distant sounds of voices raised in argument. I should check it out, but Marin was there.
Screw that.
I wanted to explore, and well, this was better. The heavy rock where my heart used to be gave me purpose. Plus I wasn’t fit company for anyone right now.
I ran my hands down the sides of my pants and set off. The edge of the forest loomed in front of me and I followed my path from the day before. My feet took me to the first Y in the path. It didn’t seem as ominous to me now. I’d meant to come back with a group. But I didn’t want to return to town now. Yet my feet weren’t moving.
Could I handle finding a lab and the memories that ensued alone? What if I found Xade and the others? What if, what if, I’d drown in what ifs, if I didn’t make myself do. It was useless to dawdle. My eyelid twitched, there was nothing back in Center I wanted right now, or more accurately, wanted me.
The first step along the path was the hardest. I half-expected a monster to come roaring out of the darkness, but the left meandered along just as the right path did before the highway. The vegetation was thicker here, even denser and more ominous. Nothing appeared to have traveled this way in a long time. The silence pressed on me, but there was no cold. Brush slapped me as I walked, occasionally catching on my clothes.
It got darker and cooler, the farther in I traveled. I couldn’t see the suns through the canopy anymore. I kept walking. I’d scrounged supplies enough to sleep out here if needed. With Marin in town, maybe I would sleep out here anyway. I wouldn’t be missed. Well, Finn might miss me. Marin wouldn’t. Zanth and Hana and the rest would understand.
The trees rose stark ahead of me. The wood gray, a few buds sprouted along the limbs before me announcing the start of spring. A feather lay across the path in front of me, at least three feet long, green at the base shading to dark blue then black at the tip. I stooped to pick it up.
I peered above me. Nada. That would have to be one large bird to drop a feather this size. I shivered as I thought of the wings from my vision. My knife was sheathed, but I got it out. It felt better to hold it as I walked.
A few feet farther and I noticed the stillness in the air. The area was quiet overall, but even the small background noises, the crunching of the brush underneath my feet, the crack of the branches, all of that faded.
My steps faltered and stopped.
“Elizabeth!” A furious bellow behind me.
I twisted and watched Marin charge up the path. I huffed out a breath. The sight of him nearly took my breath away, hair mussed, boots back on, chest heaving. He’d followed me.
His eyes burned when he reached me and he shook me like a rag doll. “What are you doing? You could not face me, could not bother talking to me, your mate. Just going to take off, run away again. You are good at that, are you not?”
He snarled and kept shaking me. “Answer me.” He wasn’t silent now. This was so much better.
I shoved him back hard and then threw myself into his arms.
He staggered back and we were kissing. His taste flooded me, Male, Marin, mine. God, this was so much better. I ran my hands through his shorn hair, he grabbed my ass. I couldn’t believe how much I’d missed him, how incomplete I felt without him. When he didn’t seem to care, that broke me. Better he hate, better he scream, yell, and rage. I preferred that to indifference.
We devoured each other with our mouths. His tongue caressed mine. He tasted like home, like mine, that quintessential flavor I associated with everything good. He pressed me into him, and even through the layers I could feel how hard he was for me.
“I am so angry with you right now,” he whispered furiously at me.
He released me and I staggered to my feet. He ripped my jacket off as I reciprocated with his, anxious to feel his skin against me. My hands tunneled under his shirt, pulling it up and off. The chill didn’t register.
He leaned his forehead against mine as he pulled me close, his hand reaching down to unlace his pants.
I cradled his face in my hands. “I missed you so much. I am so glad you are here with me.”
He blew out his breath and kissed me, nose nudging mine. “Elizabeth.”
Just one word, my name. I shivered at hearing his voice, nipping at his lower lip.
He got his pants down and started on mine. He brushed my thighs and I shuddered. He pushed my leathers down. I stepped out of them. He lifted me up. My legs twined around his back, and he pumped inside me.
We both groaned. Home. His tongue swept inside my mouth to the same rhythm as his hips. He cradled my ass in his hands. I arched back at a particularly deep thrust, moaning. He bit my neck with the next thrust, deeper and deeper. My thighs quivered, welcoming him, spiraling closer until I came with a rush, my arms laced around his shoulders.
Yes.
His answering moan came a second later, his shaft throbbing inside me. “Yes.”
I tightened my legs when he went to drop me, mewling a protest. I hadn’t realized I kept repeating, “I love you,” over and over as he screwed me in the forest. As soon as I realized, my “I love you’s” trailed off.
He didn’t reciprocate, but burrowed his face into my neck. His breath stirred the hairs near my ears. My nipples tightened in response.
In a normal tone of voice, he proceeded, “I am going to have to drop you now. I cannot hold you any longer.”
The words seemed ominous. A pang shot through my chest. I stood on my own and wriggled, getting my pants back on. He laced up and yanked his shirt on. I picked up my jacket and regarded him warily.
Marin put his hands on his hips. “Time to head back.”
I shrugged. “You go back. I want to see what is at the end of this pass. I will be back soon.” My tone was even. I was proud of myself. When I turned, a tear slid down my face and I dashed it away.
Marin growled. “I am tired from traveling and I am done with these games. Come back right now.”
I pivoted and yelled right back. “And I’m done with you telling me what to do.”
His jaw clenched. “You do not get a choice about that.”
I gasped. “Like hell I don’t, I always have a choice.”
“Not as my mate.” He grabbed my arm and started tugging me back to town.
“Wanna bet?” I pulled my arm free rubbing it and stood my ground. “No, there is something I need to find.”
“Something you need more than me. Why am I not surprised?”
Oh no. “I needed you more than anything when I traveled here. I knew you couldn’t leave, but I had to. I had to. Don’t you get that? I could feel the land calling. I tried talking to you every night, every single night. And you were the one who didn’t reply. You were the one who said things were over.”
Marin pointed a finger at my face. “Things between us will never be over. You are my mate. You might take that lightly, but I do not.”
I flinched back. Fine. I turned away and headed down the path I’d been walking.
“Elizabeth, get back here.” His hands gripped my shoulders and he swung me around. He placed his face right in front of mine.
His mouth opened, but before he could utter another word Zanth spoke up from behind us. “Stop, Marin. We had already resolved to explore here before you arrived. I was delayed.”
Marin turned to him and glared at his brother. Zanth was apparently not in his good graces either. Zanth’s shoulder smacked into Marin’s when he passed. He held his arm out to me. I curtsied and took it. We walked forward, leaving Marin stewing behind us.
“Thanks,” I whispered.
Zanth’s lips curved upward. “What are brothers for?”
That was the first time he called himself my brother. My steps faltered. I resisted the urge to cry and squeezed Zanth’s arm. Marin caught up to us in a few paces. He stomped, which was hard to do on dirt, but he was quite efficient at it, and moved between us.
There are silent trips and there are silent trips. This was the latter. All the unspoken words danced in the air, refusing to be uttered. I cried inside, but damned if I would show him any more of my tears. An hour passed then two. I handed a canteen to them. We passed it around. Marin sagged behind us and I slowed. Guilt stirred. He’d just gotten here after the mountain journey and had had no rest. Maybe we should head back.
Then we turned a corner and I saw the building ahead. My senses stirred. The structure had a lot of glass at the front, made of the same translucent rock that marked their buildings.
“What is that?” muttered Zanth.
“One of their buildings. I remember this rock from my time on their ship.” I held out my hand and moved closer.
Marin snagged my waist. “Stop, we do not know what is in there. It might not be safe.”
“This is what I was meant to find.” I grabbed hold of Marin’s hand and tugged him to the building, Zanth reluctantly trailing behind.
When we got close, the doors slid open with a scrape and a puff of stagnant air. The inside still sparkled shiny and white, though dust motes floated in the air. I’d dreamed of a place like this.
As if in a trance, I ventured forward, my nose stinging from the antiseptic smell. I ran my hand along a large central desk made of the smooth indestructible stone.
This was my laboratory.
Marin laced his fingers with mine. “Elizabeth.”
I shuddered and put my free hand on my belly, the hair on my neck rising. This was the place I’d been searching for. I made it.
Zanth walked to the right. “There are more rooms here. A hallway.”
“Yes,” I whispered and followed him to the nearest room, pulling free of Marin’s grasp. There were no handles on the doors, but again, when we got close, the doors slid open. Marin and Zanth were right on my heels when I entered the room.
Desks popped up from the floor. On each desk, there was a monitor recessed inside. I ran my hand across a screen. No response. My fingers dropped to press on the surface of the desk and drawers popped open. The uppermost drawer was filled with chemicals, the one below had beakers and flasks, just as I remembered, but not. This place had long been abandoned, its purpose lost.
I remembered faces, the E’mani directing me, their pale countenances undeniable, but there were others here with me, some human, some not.
Marin turned in a circle. “Elizabeth. What is this?”
“I don’t know but I’ve been here before.”
We ducked into every room. One still held a dead body strapped to a central slab. It might have even been the man I got samples from, patient 549321. The bones were picked clean. There were no bugs either. Given the abandoned vibe, I expected more insect activity, more dirt, animals. So far, I didn’t see that. Only a little bit of dust.
There was a doorway at the end of the hall.
“This place makes me sad,” Zanth said.
“Yes,” I replied.
Marin’s hand rested on my shoulders. Our eyes met. I rubbed my cheek along the back of his fingers then I remembered and pulled away. His fingers tightened then withdrew.
Zanth stood at the open door. It led to a staircase. Zanth went down first, his knife out, held to the side of his leg. I followed and Marin lagged behind. The stairs were only one story, leading to a basement. We entered a hall identical to the one above. A clicking followed by a whooshing sound reached us from the end of the hallway. We huddled by the door.
“What is that?” I asked.
“Not sure,” Zanth replied. “It is coming from the end of the corridor. Do we go?” He looked back at Marin for confirmation.
Marin glanced at me. “Do you sense them?”
No question to whom he was referring. “No. This is the place I’ve needed to find. It’s important.” But if he said no, we’d come back later. He’d already come this far after traveling from Groos for me, I couldn’t ask for more. That he was here was enough, even if things didn’t work out.
His eyes searched mine. “Then we have to see what is there.
Four sets of doors were open on either side of us, but we ignored them to investigate the noise.
Click, click, whoosh.
My hand involuntarily reached back for Marin’s. What was in the room? Was someone here?
The door opened soundlessly. The room was a crematorium, the fire still active. There were scores of bodies piled on carts on either side of the door. Again, the bones long since picked clean. It didn’t even smell. How odd.. It was like one day the E’mani got up and left. They didn’t finish what they started, they just up and left, leaving corpses behind.
I backed out of the room. The door shut behind me. I heard a thump and twirled back around. Neither Zanth nor Marin were there.