Chapter Thirty-Six
Serena
Yet another day has slipped by. I have been trying to focus all day while reading over my stack of term papers, but my thoughts always seem to stray to Cade. He still hasn’t called, and at this point, I’ve given up hope that I’ll hear from him, despite Ashley’s continued faith that things will work out. It was my turn to cook dinner, but Ashley took pity on me and ordered pizza. She said she was simply craving a deep dish, but I’m certain she’s just afraid I might get distracted and catch the kitchen on fire. She might not be wrong.
I turn and glance down the hall to check on Alan who’s playing in the sun room by the back deck, then try to focus so I can at least finish grading the term paper I’m only a couple of pages from completing before the pizza arrives. When there’s a knock at the door, I know that might not happen. Ashley goes to answer it.
I am deep into reading the term paper, and I don’t look up until Ashley clears her throat. When I do, a lump forms in my throat. Cade is standing behind her.
“I’m going to take Alan outside,” she says softly. I can only nod, and she squeezes my hand as she passes. When I hear the door close behind her and Alan, I make eye contact with Cade.
“Hi,” I say quietly as I stand from my chair.
“Hey,” he replies flatly. I start towards him, but my steps halt and tears begin to trickle down my face. I can’t help but think he probably doesn’t want me near him. In seconds, Cade is in front of me and pulling me into his arms. The moment he does, I lose it. My tears fall freely, wetting the front of his shirt. He just holds me.
“I’m so sorry, Cade. If I could do it over, I would take it all back and do it so much differently. I’d tell you when you showed up in my office and noticed the picture.”
“I know you’re sorry, Serena. It’s okay,” he says soothingly as he rubs my back.
“It’s not okay. It was awful of me.”
“Don’t beat yourself up over it. I know now, and all we can do is go forward from here.”
“Forward? As in together?” I look up at him, tear-stained face and all.
“If you’ll have me,” he responds softly, wiping a tear from my cheek with his thumb.
“Shouldn’t I be the one saying that?” I admit.
“Let’s sit down,” he says, leading me to the couch. For a few moments, we just sit silently beside each other. I revel in the feel of Cade’s arm around me. I wasn’t sure I would ever be here again.
“Why did you keep it from me?” he finally asks, breaking the silence.
“I was afraid,” I admit.
“Afraid of what?”
“Everything. At first, I was afraid you might not want a child changing your life. Then I was afraid of how you’d react when I told you. What it would mean for Alan…and for me. I couldn't wrap my head around the idea that someone like you would ever want to be with someone like me.”
His brow furrows and he looks down at me like he doesn’t understand. “You’re so confident, though.”
“Maybe in most areas of my life, but not when it comes to relationships. I guess I do pretty well at hiding my fears. You know there have only been a few men in my life. Most men find my career and — this sounds a little arrogant to even say — but my intelligence off putting, even some of my colleagues. After I had Alan, it was even harder.
“I’ve never really connected with someone like I did with you. From that first meeting I felt it. And, I ran away that night because I just couldn't fathom how we would ever work out, so I thought it better to save myself the heartache.”
“Anyone intimidated by how intelligent you are doesn’t deserve to be around you. I love that you know about things I don’t, and I love that you can teach me about how stars are born or how you discover new parts of our solar system. And, I love that you listen to me when I tell you about something you don’t know anything about, so you can understand it. You’re involved, and that’s rare. And not only are you intelligent, but you’re witty and beautiful, and the best mother I have ever met.”
My heart flutters in my chest. I want nothing more than to kiss him just for being there. “You’re pretty special, too, Cade. The fact that you listen to my ramblings about anything scientific, and that I truly feel as though you hear me when I talk to you, that’s hard to come by. Even when two people have similar things in common.”
“Yeah? Well, you know what I like the best about you?”
“What?” I ask.
“Your love for fried chicken,” he says with a grin.
I laugh, and Cade laughs along with me as he tugs me closer.
“I had a hard time seeing what was in front of me and accepting the obvious truth,” I tell him.
He smiles. “What truth is that?”
I sit up a little and turn toward him. “That I love you. I love you, Cade.”
He leans in and captures my lips under his in a soft, sweet kiss. “I love you, too, Serena,” he whispers against my lips. He pulls me into his embrace, and we kiss. My heart is immediately full and truly happy. When we break apart, Cade touches his forehead to mine.
“What do you think about you and Alan moving in with me?”
“Cade...it’s too soon.”
“Says who?” he chides.
“Won’t we confuse Alan?”
“We’re a family, so let’s be a family.” Tears well in my eyes when he says it. “Let’s talk to Alan,” he suggests. I nod, and we get up, walking outside to find Ashley and Alan. Ashley looks up first and smiles knowingly as Cade and I walk out hand in hand.
“Alan?” I call out to him.
“Cade!” he yells out, running towards him.
Cade scoops him up and hugs him tightly. “Hey, buddy.”
“Mommy say that you’re my dad, she picked you,” Alan sing-songs.
“She sure did pick me,” Cade agrees. “I have a question for you. What would you think about you and your mommy moving in with me at my house?”
“Can my panda bear come?” Alan asks.
Cade laughs. “Of course, he can.”
“Is there candy at your house?” Alan continues.
“All the Twizzlers and M&M’s you can eat, pal,” Cade assures him.
“Mommy! We live with Mr. Cade now!” Alan says as he wriggles from Cade’s arms to get down.
Everyone laughs, and once again, I begin to cry. Cade reaches for my hand as we all follow Alan inside who is talking a mile a minute.
“Hey, why are you crying?” Cade asks, leaning in to talk close to my ear.
“They’re happy tears, I promise.”
“They better be,” he says, wiping one away.
“When Alan gets a little bit older, though, can you have the talk with him?”
He chuckles. “Oh, I see how it is. Shuffling the hard stuff on me already,” he teases.
“Shut up,” I smack his arm.
“Yeah, I think I can manage that. We’ll have to figure out a way for him to understand that you didn't buy me from the dad store in the meantime, though.”
“Probably a good idea,” I agree. I tug Cade’s hand to move him forward when the doorbell rings. “Pizza’s here. You hungry?”
“Starving, but pizza in a box isn’t exactly what I have in mind,” he smirks.
“Let me talk to Ashley and see if she’ll watch Alan. Maybe we can go back to your place, and I can show you just how much I love you,” I wink at him.
“I think I like the sound of that.”
“Thought you might,” I smiled.
“Tomorrow we can start packing your place.”
“In a hurry, are you?”
“I missed out on three years. I have a lot of catching up to do, and I don’t want to miss another second with you. You’re it, Serena Jacobs. Like it or not, you’re stuck with me,” he pulled me to him and kissed me tenderly.
“I think maybe I’m going to like it.”
***
The next morning, I wake up feeling like I am exactly where I am supposed to be and that the pieces of my life have finally fallen into place. I roll over and snuggle against Cade’s back, and he turns so he’s on his back, lifting his arm so I can slide in beside him and rest my head on his chest.
“Good morning,” he says, kissing the top of my head.
“I told Ashley we’d be back in time for breakfast this morning,” I tell him.
“That’s fine. And then, we can get your things from her place before we head to your house to get what you need for a few days. We can have movers get the rest next week.”
“What should we do with my furniture?”
“Are you attached to any of it?”
“A few things,” I admit.
“You can bring whatever you want, and we can donate the rest.”
“Well, we’ll need Alan’s bedroom furniture, but your bed is far and away more comfortable than mine, so no debate there. I have a china cabinet that has been in my family for years, but I don’t know where you would put it.”
“We’ll find a place for it. Anything else?”
“My desk.”
“I have a spare room we can turn into your office,” he offers.
“What about Alan?”
“There’s a guest bedroom we can turn into his room and it has an attached bathroom. It’s white but we can let Alan pick out colors and hire some painters.”
“You’d really do all of that for us?”
“Of course. I love you, Serena, and I love Alan, too. You’re both very easy to fall in love with.” I blush, and he holds me close. “Before we go though, I need to tell you one thing.”
I sit up and look down at him. His expression is serious. “Is something wrong?”
“No,” he says as he sits up. “I just want you to know that the day before yesterday, Josephine showed up here. She did hire a private investigator to dig up dirt on you, trying to break us up. She came because she thought she’d won and we’d get back together. I made her leave and reminded her that she and I didn’t have a future together in any lifetime or any alternate reality.”
“Oh, wow,” I murmured.
“She will never bother us again, I swear. And, I changed all the locks just in case she had a copy of her key made. Changed the alarm codes, too. We can call them later and get a code set for you. I already had keys made.”
“Can I tell you something?”
“Anything,” he said, placing a kiss on my forehead again.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been happier in my life. I’m glad you dropped in unannounced on my lecture. I hate what we’ve gone through the last week, and I know it was my fault, but we’re here now, and like you said, we move forward, not backward.”
“Always forward,” he smiles. “Always.”