Defying Gravity (Healing Hearts Book 2) by Laura Farr (10)

Waking up the next morning, I stretched my arms above my head and yawned. Despite having struggled to fall asleep, I slept really well, and so far I hadn’t felt the need to rush for the bathroom and throw up. I wasn’t going to hope the morning sickness was completely gone, because I knew the nausea could strike at any time. I reached across the bed to my nightstand and grabbed my phone, pushing the home button to illuminate the screen. I saw I had an unread message from Alex.

I stared at my phone, rereading the message. With everything that had happened the day before and then with Libby and Mason’s news, I’d completely forgotten that Alex had my number. My finger hovered over the reply button, and after a few seconds of indecision, I clicked it.

I bit my lip nervously as I waited for him reply. I wasn’t exactly sure what I was doing. My head and heart were full of Josh, and I was nearly five months pregnant, but there I was texting some guy I’d met in a bar. I knew nothing could come from texting him—hell, I didn’t even want anything to come from it—but I’d have been lying if I said it didn’t feel good to have some attention from someone. I was pulled from my thoughts by the buzz of an incoming message, and I looked down at my screen.

I dropped my phone and slumped back down on the bed. I knew I should just stop this immediately, tell him I’m pregnant, and delete his number. There was no way he would want to take me out for a drink if he knew the truth, and I wasn’t even sure I wanted to go with him anyway. From what I could remember, he was extremely good-looking with bright blue eyes and short blond hair, and he had seemed really nice when I’d dragged him into my argument with Josh. I sighed and picked up my phone.

My screen flashed with a response almost immediately.

I knew I should just tell him I was pregnant; he wouldn’t even want a chance then. The phone buzzed again.

I sighed and closed my eyes. Part of me wanted to go out with Alex, even if it was only to piss Josh off, which I knew was an immature thing to do and not at all fair to Alex, but then it was Alex that was pushing for the date, even though he knew I was hung up on Josh. Josh always got so worked up when he saw me with someone else; he didn’t want me, but it seemed he didn’t want anyone else to have me either.

I smoothed my hand down my t-shirt and over my small bump. You couldn’t really tell I was pregnant, and I didn’t have to tell him, right? I could just go on one date with him, one last date before my social life was non-existent and consisted of bottle feeds and diaper changes. Before I changed my mind, I quickly typed out a reply.

I knew I wasn’t exactly being fair to him, agreeing to a date when I knew it couldn’t go anywhere, but hopefully a date in the middle of the day screamed friendship rather than romance. I sighed and shook my head. Who was I kidding? A ride through the ranch to the river screamed romance. God, I was an idiot, but I didn’t have time to try to put him off the idea as my phone buzzed in my hand again.

He was definitely interested; I’d have to go along with it now and hope for the best. I sent him a message asking him to come at about 11:30 and told him my address. I checked the time: 9:30. I was guessing Josh would be at the cottage by now, and I knew I would have to show my face before I met Alex. Josh was, for whatever reason, giving up his free time to help me.

I sighed as I swung my legs over the edge of the bed. Standing up, I padded across the

room to the bathroom and climbed into the shower. As the hot water pounded my skin, I tipped my head back and closed my eyes, enjoying the feeling of the water massaging my body. I stayed under the spray for far longer than I needed to before drying off, throwing on some shorts and a sleeveless top, and making my way downstairs to the kitchen.

The aroma of bacon hit my nose as I pushed the door to the kitchen open. Four pairs of eyes turned to face me, and I stopped in the doorway as Mom, Dad, Brody, and Josh all stared at me.

“Morning sweetheart,” my mom said before smiling and turning back to the stove.

“Morning. What are you all doing here?” I asked, avoiding making eye contact with Josh.

“We’ve all been at the cottage since early this morning, and your mom’s just making us some breakfast before we continue with the painting,” my dad replied, crossing the kitchen and kissing me on the head. “Sit down,” he said, guiding me to the table.

“You’ve all been at the cottage?” I asked in surprise, only then noticing that they all had paint spattered on their clothes.

“It’s almost finished,” my mom said from the stove. “You should go look after breakfast.”

I nodded. “Thank you,” I whispered, finally finding Josh’s gaze. He flashed me his heart-stopping smile and butterflies erupted in my stomach. Even though I didn’t have a clue where I stood with him and was meeting Alex in just over an hour, his smile was infectious and I found myself grinning back at him.

“Savannah?” I heard my mom say, dragging my attention back to everyone else in the room. As I turned to look at her, I caught her smiling at me. “Do you want some bacon?” she asked with a wink.

“I’ll try some, it smells great,” I told her, my face flushing as I realized she’d seen me grinning like an idiot at Josh. “I hope it doesn’t make me throw up!” I exclaimed.

“Now, now, Savannah, your mom’s cooking isn’t that bad,” my dad said with a laugh.

“Hey!” my mom exclaimed, reaching out and swatting him with the spatula that was in her hand. “You can make your own bacon next time, smart mouth!” she told him, a smile forming on her lips.

“Awww, you know I love you baby,” he said sweetly, tickling her around the waist as she squealed and pushed his hands away. I looked over at them and smiled. They were so happy; I was envious of their relationship, and could only hope that one day I would be as happy as they obviously were.

After I ate a bacon sandwich and quickly threw some jeans on, we all made our way to the cottage. I was walking arm in arm with my mom as Brody, Josh, and my dad walked on ahead.

“You’re very quiet sweetheart, are you okay?” my mom asked, squeezing on my good arm, which was linked with hers. “If you’re having second thoughts about moving into the cottage, it’s not too late to change your mind.”

I shook my head. “I’m fine. I’m not having second thoughts. I need to do this—it’s the right thing for me and the baby.”

She nodded her head and smiled. “As long as you’re sure.”

“I am,” I reassured her, even though if I was honest with myself, I was nervous as hell. We caught up with the others, and they were all waiting for us outside the cottage door.

“There’s still some painting left to do, so it’s not quite ready to move into yet, but I think we might have it finished by the end of today,” Josh said, reaching for my hand and leading me through the door. My arm erupted in goose bumps from his touch, and I followed him blindly, loving the feel of his large hand enveloping mine.

The smell of paint hit me as we walked into the sitting room. The room was dark as the only window was boarded up due to the broken pane, so when the light was flicked on and the freshly painted room came into view, I gasped. “Wow, it looks amazing!” I exclaimed, looking around. The walls were painted with the ivory paint we’d chosen from Target, and the fireplace had been cleaned out, ready for a fire to be built. I hadn’t been in the cottage since hurting my hand and was glad to see that the blood had been cleaned up from in front of the window. The wooden floors looked like they had been polished. “How did you manage to get it looking like this in one morning?” I asked in shock.

“It was a joint effort honey. We each took a room,” my mom said, her eyes dropping to my hand, still encased in Josh’s. She smiled. “Your dad and I did in here, Brody took the baby’s room, and Josh, your room. All that’s left to do is the bathroom, and then it all needs a good cleaning. I think you could move in next week, if you’re ready?”

I nodded as I felt my stomach churn with nerves. It was actually happening—the cottage was almost ready and I’d be moving in, alone. I felt Josh squeeze my hand. “You okay? You’re really quiet—if there’s something you don’t like, we can change it,” he said.

“No, everything is great, I love it,” I rushed out. “I’m really grateful for everything you’ve all done for me.” I plastered on a smile. “I guess I’m going to need some furniture—I feel a shopping trip coming on!” I exclaimed, trying to push the nerves away. I’d never lived anywhere other than at home, and it was going to take some getting used to.

“You won’t need much sweetie. You can have all of your bedroom furniture, and the sofa from the den for in here, so you’ll just need furniture for the baby’s room,” my mom said, pulling me away from Josh and guiding me upstairs.

After seeing the rest of the cottage, I thanked everyone and made an excuse to leave, telling everyone I had a headache. My parents thought it was because of the paint and ushered me outside, but not before my gaze landed on Josh, the concern evident on his face. I dropped my eyes from his and headed back to the house. He must have known somehow that I was lying about the headache, but I didn’t want them all to know about my date. I knew I was making a mistake going out with Alex, and I was going to make sure I kept things in the friend zone with him. Once we’d gone for a ride, I’d tell him I couldn’t see him again.

As I walked back to the house, I saw Mason coming out of the stables. I raised my hand in greeting and he waved back. I hoped he wouldn’t be around when Alex arrived; I wanted to slip away on the horses without anyone noticing us. I had half an hour to kill before Alex was due, so I quickly got changed into some shorts I could still fit into and grabbed my cowboy boots before sitting on the porch swing to wait for him to arrive.

At 11:30 on the dot, I saw a truck pull into the drive and Alex hopped out. He raised his hand and waved, and I gave him a small wave back. Taking a deep breath, I headed down the steps to meet him.

“Hey Savannah,” Alex said, brushing a kiss across my cheek. “You look beautiful.”

“Thank you,” I replied quietly, embarrassed by his compliment.

“What did you do to your hand?” he asked, reaching down and taking my bandaged hand in his. “Will you be able to ride?”

I nodded, gently pulling my hand free of his. “I cut it when a window broke, and it looks worse than it is. I’ll be fine to ride.” I paused, watching as he nodded. There was no mistaking how gorgeous he was, and I could tell he was well built by the way his t-shirt pulled tight across his chest, his tanned arms bulging out of the sleeves. Despite acknowledging that he was good-looking, my stomach didn’t flip, and my heart didn’t race when I looked at him. There had only ever been one guy who had that effect on me, and I was guessing there would only ever be one guy who did. Pushing my feelings for Josh away, I focused my attention back on Alex. “Should we head out?”

“Yep, lead the way,” he said enthusiastically. I felt awful that I was leading him on. Even if I hadn’t been pregnant, I knew nothing would ever happen between us, not while I was still so hung up on Josh. “This place is incredible,” he exclaimed, looking around in awe. “Did you grow up here?”

“Yeah, my Grams and Grandpa ran the ranch, and my parents took over when they couldn’t manage anymore. Running this place is all my parents have ever known. They’ve changed it quite a bit since my grandparents died, but I really love it here.” We’d reached the stables and I pushed the door open with my good hand, relieved to see that Mason wasn’t around. “All the ranch horses are kept in here, and I keep Marley, my own horse, with them. I thought you could ride Titan, he’s the black horse in the end stall. I’ll just get the saddles.”

“Let me help you.”

“Okay thanks,” I replied, realizing I was going to struggle to saddle up the horses with only one hand. Thankfully Alex seemed to know what he was doing, and 15 minutes later I was sitting atop Marley, heading out past the guest accommodations with Alex riding next to me. I edged Marley into a slow trot, enjoying the warm breeze rushing around me. Alex looked confident on Titan and joined me in a trot. It was a beautiful fall day, and the sun was shining. The weather had been unusually warm for the time of year, and it was a perfect day for a ride. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket, signaling a message, but I couldn’t stop to check it as my good hand was holding Marley’s reins. It would have to wait until I reached the lake and was able to dismount.

“So where are we heading then Savannah?” Alex asked after we’d ridden in silence for a few minutes.

“The Colorado River. It’s about a 45-minute ride, but it’s well worth it. It’s my favorite place on the ranch.”

“Sounds great,” he replied, smiling across at me. I gave him a small smile back as I felt my phone buzz in my pocket again.

We chatted comfortably as we rode, and I found out that Alex was quite a bit older than me at 28 and worked as a physical therapist at the hospital in Marble Falls. He asked me what I did and seemed surprised when I told him I was in college, getting a degree in business. “I thought you were around my age—you look older than 21,” he said.

I laughed, looking over at him. “I’m not sure whether to take that as a compliment or not.”

“You’re beautiful Savannah, it was definitely a compliment.” Feeling my face flush, I dropped my eyes from his, and we continued in a comfortable silence. I felt my phone vibrate with three more messages before it started to vibrate continually, indicating that someone was trying to call me. I knew from my surroundings that we were about 10 minutes from the river. Someone obviously needed to get in touch with me, and I needed to get there to check that everything was okay. I could have stopped and dismounted, but if I was being honest, I had struggled slightly to mount Marley with my bad hand, and I didn’t want to have to dismount and mount unnecessarily. I hadn’t wanted to ask Alex for any help back at the stables after telling him I would be fine to ride.

Finally reaching the river, I carefully dismounted Marley, being careful of my hand, and left him to graze in the shade of the trees. Alex did the same with Titan and we made our way to the water’s edge. Digging in my pocket with my good hand, I pulled out my phone and held it up. “Sorry, it was going crazy on the ride here, do you mind if I check it?” I asked Alex.

“Of course not, go for it.”

Squinting in the sunlight, I looked down at the display: four messages and a missed call, all from Josh. “Shit,” I mumbled under my breath. “What does he want?”

“Savannah, you’ve gone pale, is everything okay?” Alex asked, concern lacing his voice.

“I just need to make a quick call, would you excuse me?” I asked him. Not waiting for a reply, I stepped away, heading back toward the horses in an attempt to hide my call from him. The last thing I needed was Josh showing up. He would know exactly where I was—we’d come to this spot as kids all the time and he knew I loved it there. I hit the call button and waited; it didn’t even ring, just went straight to voicemail. The signal out there was patchy and it was luck of the draw if your phone worked; Josh’s obviously didn’t. I ended the call and frantically typed him a message in the hope that he would get the text before he showed up.

I hit send and prayed he would get it in time and turn around. I rolled my eyes and groaned—looking at the time of his last message, he would probably be there in about 10 minutes if he rode quickly. Although Josh hadn’t grown up on a ranch like Brody and I had, he had spent most of his summers at ours since he was about 10 and was as good on a horse as Brody was. Josh lived in a huge house just outside of Marble Falls. His parents owned a construction company, and while he had a good relationship with them, they were never home much when he was growing up, spending all their time working. As soon as Josh had been old enough, he had spent most of his free time at our place, learning to ride and fish with Brody and me.

“Savannah,” Alex called from behind me. “Do we need to head back? Is everything okay?”

“No, no, everything is fine, just a misunderstanding,” I lied. “Do you feel like a dip?” I asked him in an attempt to change the subject. I wasn’t going to tell him Josh was potentially on his way, and I was still hopeful he would get my message in time.

“Sure,” he replied, slipping his boots off. I kicked off my boots too and slipped my toe into the water, squealing at how cold it was. I heard Alex laugh behind me and I turned, kicking some water up at him. He laughed again and eased in, standing next to me with his shoulder touching mine. “I can see why you like it here, it’s so quiet.”

I nodded as I looked around. It was my favorite place on the ranch and it never failed to amaze me; it was so beautiful and peaceful. I closed my eyes and dropped my head back. The water may have been cold, but the sun was warm on my face.

“We used to come here all the time when we were kids. We’d spend all day here, playing in the water, swimming, fishing. I loved it.”

“We?” he asked.

“My brother and…” I trailed off, not wanting to bring up Josh.

“Your brother’s friend?” he finished for me, saying what I couldn’t. I nodded and turned to face him.

“Look Alex, maybe this wasn’t—” He lowered his head and the next thing I knew, his lips were crashing into mine as he silenced me with a kiss.

“Savannah!” I heard an angry voice yell. I pulled away from Alex and spun around to see Josh flying through the clearing on one of the ranch horses. He jumped down off the horse and marched over, anger radiating off him. “Well now I know why you weren’t answering your phone,” he snapped. Stopping right at the water’s edge, he turned to Alex. “I know you!” he exclaimed, pointing at him. “You’re the jerk from the bar the other night.”

“Josh!” I shouted.

“It’s fine Savannah,” Alex assured me, moving slightly so he was standing in front of me.

Josh must have noticed what he was doing and let out a sarcastic laugh. “You think I’m going to hurt her?” Josh shouted, shaking his head. “It’s you who let a pregnant woman ride here with one hand,” he yelled at him. I sucked my breath in sharply and closed my eyes as I waited for Alex to realize what Josh had said.

“Pregnant?” he asked, confused. He turned around to face me. “Savannah, what’s going on?”

“I’m sorry Alex, I wanted to tell you, I just didn’t know how.” I dropped my eyes from his and fiddled with the bandage on my hand, shame engulfing me.

“So, it’s true?” he asked, the disbelief evident in his voice. I forced myself to look at him and was met with angry eyes. I nodded slowly. “You agreed to go on a date with me, knowing you were pregnant?”

“You were pushing me to go out with you. I told you I had a lot going on.”

He took a step closer to me. “Why didn’t you just tell me you were pregnant? Were you planning to sleep with me then tell me the baby was mine?” he growled at me, the nice guy from a few minutes before suddenly gone.

“What? No! Of course not,” I exclaimed, taking a step back. “I’m not a slut!”

“Could have fooled me sweetheart!”

“Hey!” Josh yelled from behind him. “Don’t speak to her like that!” Alex spun around to face him, and I breathed a small sigh of relief that his anger was no longer focused on me.

“This has nothing to do with you, it’s between me and Savannah. What are you even doing here anyway?” Alex snapped.

“It has everything to do with me,” Josh replied. “And there is no you and Savannah. You need to leave, now!”

“You don’t get to tell me what to do,” Alex said, turning and grabbing me. I yelped as his hand gripped my upper arm and he pulled me toward him.

“Take your hands off her!” Josh bellowed, walking into the water toward us. As Alex turned to confront him, Josh swung his fist, punching Alex in the face. I stumbled slightly as Alex lost his grip on my arm, and I watched as he fell backward into the water.

“You’re done here Alex. Take the horse back and leave her alone. Come on Savannah,” Josh said, reaching for my good hand and guiding me out of the water. Overwhelmed by what had just happened, I followed him in silence. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” he asked once we were out of earshot of Alex, the fingers of his hand brushing against the arm Alex had grabbed.

“What the hell just happened? Why are you here Josh?” I asked him, pulling my hand from his and turning to look back toward the river, where I saw Alex staggering out of the water, blood pouring from his nose.

“I saw you ride off on Marley and I was worried about you. You shouldn’t be riding while you’re pregnant, and given what just happened, I think it was a good thing I was here, don’t you?” Josh replied cockily.

I stared at him in disbelief. “Are you out of your mind? That never would have happened if you hadn’t shown up!” I exclaimed, gesturing toward the water. “It has nothing to do with you if I ride or not—I’ve been riding since I could walk and I know what I’m doing. How dare you tell Alex I’m pregnant! Everything was fine until you showed up.”

“Well I assumed that as you had your tongue halfway down his throat, you had already told him you were pregnant. I assumed you would have had that conversation when he asked you out!”

“Don’t you dare judge me. It is none of your business who I choose to tell, and it’s even less of your business who I’m kissing. Just back off.” I paused, taking a deep breath. “In fact, stay away from me completely.” I could have sworn I saw a flash of pain cross his face, but it disappeared as quickly as it had come. “I appreciate all your help with the cottage, I really do, but I think it’s best if we stay away from each other. I’m tired of hurting Josh, and whenever I’m around you, I end up hurt.” I turned away from him and headed for where Marley was grazing with Titan.

“Savannah?” Josh shouted after me.

“Please leave me alone Josh,” I replied. Not waiting for a response, I mounted Marley as quickly as I could with one hand and galloped away from the river toward the ranch, leaving Josh and Alex to make their own way back. I didn’t want to speak to either of them. Josh acted like he had some claim over me, but when it came down to it, didn’t actually want me. Now, Alex thought I was a slut—just perfect.

Tears tracked down my face as I replayed the events of the last 15 minutes in my mind. I was furious with Josh that he had turned up and blurted out to Alex about the baby. I’d known agreeing to go out with Alex had been a mistake, but never had I imagined the date ending as it had. I was taken aback by him kissing me, and I had been just about to tell him we shouldn’t see each other again. The kiss only confirmed to me that I was right, and for me there were no feelings there—how could there be when my head and heart were full of Josh? Although at the moment, I wanted to kill him.

As angry as I was with Josh, I couldn’t help remembering the flash of pain I’d seen on his face when I’d told him to stay away from me. My heart clenched at the thought of not seeing him, but I knew from the past week that the pain of being around him was far worse than the pain of not seeing him at all. It was only a matter of time before he met someone, and I couldn’t bear to be around when that happened.