Chapter 20

 

Dani headed down the long gravel drive then gasped in awe when the gnarled coastal trees cleared to expose a beautiful Victorian house perched on a small hill overlooking the ocean. This was a beach house? It looked more like the set of one of those gothic horror stories that began on a dark and stormy night and ended with someone plummeting to her death from the cliffs to the sea below.

Dani took a deep breath and quelled the panic her imagination brought on. This was not the frame of mind she needed to confront Caleb. She parked her car beside a familiar forestry truck and turned off the motor, closing her eyes and leaning back against the headrest to collect her thoughts.

Deep breaths, she told herself. You've got to stay calm and reasonable. He's leery of the heat we ignite in one another. I have to show him that I can be rational, that I won't let emotion overpower me. I have to show him that we aren't like his parents and that it won't end in violence. That we can be happy together, that it can be so good between us.

With a few more deep breaths she rose from the car and headed up the steps onto the long porch that wrapped around the entire house.

She stood at the door, steeling herself to knock. Emotions tumbled around her like autumn leaves in a light wind, but she tried to keep up a composed façade. At last, she raised her hand to knock. Dani waited, her heart beating double time. No one came to the door. She knocked again, harder. Still nothing.

It figures, she thought, looking around. His truck was out front, so he must be around here somewhere. Maybe he'd wandered down to the beach. It was unlikely. December on the coast was a cold and windy affair, and the light raindrops that fell around her made a walk on the beach unlikely. Still, she wasn't willing to give up without taking a look.

Dani followed the covered porch around the side of the house, admiring the clever landscaping as she went. The house was surrounded by wild, windblown trees and bushes but revealed the gentle touch of an expert gardener. The porch was long, and interspersed along its length were small tables and comfortable chairs. She pictured herself and Caleb relaxing at the end of a long day, enjoying the ocean smell and the sound of waves crashing against the sand.

Shaking her head to clear it of premature wishful thinking she turned the corner and walked around to the back of the house. And there he stood, gazing out over the cliffs and onto the blue gray waters below them.

She stopped for a moment, arrested by the sight of him. It made her body come alive again as if it would respond only to his touch for the rest of her life.

It was as if he realized she was there without having seen her. He couldn't have heard her, not over the sound of the waves and the scream of seabirds. Nevertheless, he turned his head to stare right at her.

She flushed, unable to look away from his bright and burning eyes.

Finally able to walk again she moved to stand beside him. He looked down into her face, his eyes asking a million questions but his mouth saying nothing.

She'd spent the whole drive here planning what she would say to win him over, but just the sight of his beautiful face drove all thoughts out of her mind. She stared at him, letting her eyes tell him what her mouth couldn't.

 

* * * * *

 

She was here. That was the only thing he could think about. He barely remembered to breathe.

She'd followed him, and here she was in front of him, and how in hell was he supposed to come up with the strength to walk away again? The wind blew her hair around her head in a dark cloud and caused goose bumps to break out along the little portion of a shoulder that was exposed by her wide-necked sweater.

His eyes searched her face, trying to determine her emotion. It was impossible. She'd plastered a cool, detached mask over her face. Caleb could see the feelings at war beneath it, however. Once again, she was a living, breathing contradiction.

He pulled his gaze away from her face although it felt like it was wedged in cement and looked back out over the crashing surf. "What are you doing here, Professor Greenhorn?" he asked, his voice flat and emotionless. He was amazed at his ability to keep his feelings out of his voice. Inside he was roiling like the waves in front of him.

"I came because you're here," she said, turning his own words of last night around on him to devastating effect.

His heart leapt in his chest, excitement rushing through every nerve ending at her words. But he forced his head to take control.

"And what do you want from me?"

He wasn't going to look at her face. He must be cold like ice, and his heart must stay frozen like tundra. One look from her warm eyes and he'd start to melt.

"Didn't you get enough last night?" He hated himself for saying it, but it was the only way to drive her away, to keep her safe.

"Apparently not." She sighed.

Caleb didn't know how to respond. He expected anger at his words, not this gentle patience. What was she playing at?

"Well maybe I did," he said, turning his back on the sea and leaning against the porch railing, his arms crossed, his face staring off into the distance.

"Are you sure?" she asked, taking a step closer. "I know what you're doing, and it's not going to work, so you might as well just stop it now."
"What do you think I'm doing?" He finally met her eyes. He hated himself. But he was afraid of her words even more.

"You think you can't let your guard down, that you can't open yourself. But you can. You already have. And I'm still here. You're trying to push me away again. But it won't work. So stop trying."

Caleb exhaled heavily, no longer willing, or perhaps even able, to continue his charade. "It has to work," he said, gripping her arms tightly and staring down into her exquisite face. "It's too risky,"

He squeezed lightly to accentuate his point. "Together, we're dangerous."

"You keep saying that, but I don't understand."

Caleb growled, releasing her and beginning to pace in front of her. "Isn't it obvious? I've got something dark inside of me, something powerful, and being with you brings it out. Somehow our tempers collide, and it becomes overwhelming. And if it's not you, then it's someone trying to hurt you. The rage claws its way out of me and I hurt people. I'm terrified that one of the people I hurt will be you."
"No."

She shook her head and moved to stand in front of him, stopping his angry pacing. "You'd never hurt me. I know it. And you only hurt those others to protect me, because they were going to kill me, kill us both. You're not an animal, Caleb. You can learn to control your anger, and I can try to control mine."

"How do you know?" he groaned. "How can you be so sure of anything you say? We've only known each other for a short time, really. How do you know we'll even be compatible?"

"Well I know we're definitely compatible in one way," she said, her voice lowering purposefully.

"Oh yeah?" He felt the scowl ease from his face. "And what way is that?" he asked huskily, expecting a certain answer.

"We both love the outdoors," she replied with a cheeky smile.

"Smart ass." Caleb pulled her into his arms, his lips descending to capture hers in a passionate kiss. Her lips burned his, and he felt his flesh ignite.

There was no denying their sexual chemistry. She made him feel like no one ever had before. With her he could envision a life of contentment, a fantasy in which they spent each day facing the world together, and each night entwined, making love until dawn.

But the other side of that dream was the nightmare that always lurked within.

He pulled away again.

"It's too great a risk," he whispered against her soft lips. "I'd give almost anything to be with you, but not if it means hurting you. I won't risk you!"

His voice grew harsh, and he ravished her lips again, his kiss desperate. He pulled her swollen bottom lip between his teeth and bit it gently. She moaned, and his tongue dove between her lips and into her mouth, seeking out her own and stroking against it in wild abandon.

"Life is full of risks," she told him when he pulled away for air. "Sometimes you have to take a great risk for the chance of an even greater reward. And there's no greater reward for me than you."

He looked down into her eyes and saw the truth painted there in strong dark strokes. She loved him, unconditionally.

He knew that love could set him free.

Dani wouldn't abandon or neglect him. She would love him, nurture him, give him the affection that had been missing his entire life. She'd cared enough about him to risk her own life. Even now, when he'd pushed her away, over and over again, she was here, proving that she loved him, proving that she wouldn't be put off by his past or his inner demons.

She was his, and he was hers, forever, and it was time he claimed her.

"I love you," he said simply, gripping her small face in his hands and pulling her lips to his again. "I love you, and I always will. I've never met a woman as fascinating or as frustrating as you, and I realize now that I could never spend the rest of my life without you."

"You scared me," he whispered. "You shoved your way into my life when I thought I was doing fine alone and you showed me exactly what was missing. I needed someone to argue with, someone to make up with, someone who makes me harder than stone any time she's in the vicinity."

She laughed then, and he smiled down at her. "Someone to keep me warm at night. Someone to listen." He kept praising her while raining kisses down upon her face, her neck, and her shoulder. "Someone to come after me when I disappear. Someone like you."

Dani's eyes filled with tears. Caleb couldn't stand the separation anymore, even though they were mere inches apart. He picked her up and cradled her against his chest, carrying her through the door and into the beach house. He finally set her down on a soft rug before the roaring fire.

Caleb slid down beside her, pulling her back into his arms and cradling her face in his large hands. "Don't cry," he whispered, his thumbs gently brushing away her teardrops. "What can I do? What do you want me to do?"
"Just be here when I wake up," she said, and Caleb crushed her to him.

"I will be," he said solemnly. "From now on, I will always be here when you wake." With those words, he claimed her lips in the softest and most sensual kiss either of them had ever experienced.

Slowly he pulled her sweater over her head then unbuttoned her jeans. She helped him push them down her legs, then pulled the little undershirt over her head and tossed it away. She sat before him, a vision in a white satin bra and matching panties.

With a moan of pure lust, he pressed himself against her, at last willing to take a chance on love. This woman was worth any risk.

 

* * * * *

 

"I love you," he said again as he kissed his way down her body and she moaned in pleasure, more at the words than his touch. She'd worn down his defenses, shown him that she wouldn't be pushed away, that she loved him too much to let him go, and he'd finally accepted that love.

Her heart felt ready to explode with the joy she felt. This rugged man, so tall and handsome, so strong and protective, this wonderful man loved her, and he was finally able to allow himself to feel loved and give love in return. It was a miracle and one that she would thank God for every damn day.

Her breath caught as she felt him slide her panties down her legs and cup her mound. She unfastened her bra and sat nude before him, the firelight coloring her body in oranges and yellows.

"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen," he told her, his voice ragged with longing. Suddenly he was tearing his own clothes off and pushing her down to the soft rug to cover her with his body.

She kissed him, sucking his tongue into her mouth and hearing him groan in passion. She tore her lips from his and worked her way down to nibble his jaw.

Caleb took hold of her breasts and squeezed them together, attempting to lick both nipples at the same time with thick swipes of his hot tongue. Dani held him tight, clutching him to her like she couldn't get enough of him. He gently pulled away, seemingly afraid of crushing her small form, and moved to the side of her.

Caleb pulled her back against him, half turning her so that he could continue to fondle her breasts. He positioned her left leg so that it was bent at the knee and above the right one. She then felt him rubbing his engorged manhood against her most intimate parts. She was so wet, so willing, that he easily slid inside of her, pulling her tight against him as he plunged all the way to her core.

"Oh Caleb!" she cried, and he rejoiced at his name on her lips.

"Say it again," he growled into her ear as he picked up the pace. "Say my name again."

"Caleb." She moaned, tightening her inner muscles to squeeze his shaft mercilessly.

"Oh God, you witch!" he groaned. "You feel so good around my cock. Don't stop."

She smiled, squeezing him as he entered her, making them both moan with passion. "I'll never leave you again," he promised as he thrust into her. "This is home. You're my home."
She wanted to weep at his words, and at the sensations he was causing inside of her. It had always been good between them, spectacular, in fact, but never like this. It was as if they were no longer two separate people, but they were one unit, one soul.

He was buried so deeply inside her that he felt like a part of her. She wished the feeling could last forever, but already she felt her climax barreling towards her.

"I love you!" she whispered fiercely as he licked and sucked her ear. Her words drove him to a more frantic pace and he began thrusting madly inside of her. Harder. Deeper. Faster. It was insanity to resist the orgasm that was a second away from overtaking her. She surrendered to it, and intense pleasure washed over her in wave after wave.

Caleb felt her muscles quivering around him and plunged deeper than ever before, burying himself to the hilt and finding his release right after she found hers. Together they rode the riptide of rapture.

Caleb held her tight as they came back to earth. The fire threw strange shapes across their bodies as Dani realized she had never felt this content. She was no longer alone, and she never would be again. Caleb was a part of her now. They were one soul.

"Thank you," he whispered in her ear, his breath humid and sending a shiver down her spine.

"For what?" she asked, puzzled.

"For coming after me. Thank you for saving me from a life of self-imposed solitude. For being you."

"I had no choice, you know. You're just too damned good looking to get out of my system."

Caleb laughed. "I knew you just wanted me for my body."

"Yup," she said. "After all, your body is where your heart is."

"No," he countered. "Here is where my heart is." He touched her chest, putting his palm over her heart. "And here's where it's gonna stay."

"It better," she said threateningly. "Remember, I got a mean right hook."

"Don't I know it." He grinned and covered his face with his hands.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Protecting my nose!"

They both laughed, and she punched him lightly in the arm.

"Oh, wanna play rough, huh?" he asked, starting to tickle her all over her body. His hands were quick, and before long she dissolved in giggles. All that touching heated their blood and before long they were making love again, thrusting and groaning and reaching for the heavens. At last they lie sated in each other's arms and stared off into the distance.

"Caleb?" she asked softly after a while.

"Yes, darlin'?"
"What's that?" She was pointing to a familiar-looking white shape that lay on a nearby leather sofa.

"Uh, that?" he asked, and she thought his face became flushed and not because of the heat of the fire.

"Is that my body pillow? What is it doing here?"
"Keeping me company," he admitted, sheepishly. "I figured if I couldn't have the real thing, at least I could hold something that had been in your arms."

"Such a remarkable turnaround," she said, barely able to hold back her laughter. "It seems like only yesterday you were telling me that I didn't need that thing."

"And you still don't."

"Why not?"

"Because you got me. And I'm a heck of a lot better than some contoured pillow."

"I'll be the judge of that," she said with a sly smile.

"Oh baby," he moaned, "please feel free to test the merchandise any time." She took him at his word, and it resulted in yet another intense coupling.

And he was right. He was so much better than any damned pillow. Caleb took her to incredible heights, again and again. Their love for each other made each time he entered her even sweeter, even more sublime. And it wasn't until the wee hours before dawn that they both dropped off into an exhausted sleep.

 

* * * * *

 

A young boy sat behind the couch, carefully arranging test tubes in his miniature science kit. Behind him, he could hear the sound of his parents move into the room and sit down on the couch. He ignored them for the present, filling a vial with liquid and carefully mixing it with a packet of solution before pouring it into the test tube. However, the sound of his mother's voice distracted him, and he stopped to listen.

"It's finished," his mother said, her voice rising slightly with emotion. "It's taken years, but it's finally finished."

"Um hmm," his father grunted, and the boy figured he wasn't paying attention.

"That's all you have to say?" his mother asked, anger evident in her voice.

"Um hmm," his father repeated, and the boy heard an angry huff of air leave his mother's mouth.

"Listen, it's taken me years to finish this project. Did you hear me, years? And all you have to say is 'um hmm'?"

"Um hmm," his father said again. The boy heard the sound of an impact, then a quiet "umph" from his father. "You hit me," he said in mock disbelief.

"That's right," his mother replied, and the boy turned around and peeked over the back of the couch to better observe the action. "You deserved it, you miserable jerk!"

"Oh that's it, you're in for it now," his father growled, and his mother shrieked as his father pounced on her.

The young boy felt sick to his stomach, watching his parents roll around on the couch. His father was furiously tickling her mother's sides while she giggled and shook. Disgusting. The young boy wondered if everyone's parents were so gross.

"Stop!" his mom squealed, as his dad nuzzled her neck.

"Never!" His father grinned. "You hit me, and now you'll take your punishment like a good girl."

"Punishment!" his mother protested. "But I expected a reward. I told you I just finished the project I've been working on, practically since my dissertation. You know how important that is to me!"

"I see," his dad said, his tone of voice indicating that he was thinking things over carefully. "So you think you deserve a reward. All right, let me know what you think of this." His father bent over to whisper in his mother's ear and she blushed, then sighed.

"Oh yes, that sounds like quite a suitable reward to me," she said, then captured his lips in a passionate kiss.

"Yuck!" the young boy groaned from behind the couch. His father lifted his head and both his parents stared at him and started to laugh.

"Come on, darlin'," his father said, standing up and then pulling his mother up to stand beside him. "It looks like we've offended our son's delicate sensibilities."

"He must get his fragile stomach from your side of the family." His mother poked his dad good-naturedly. His parents walked around the couch and the boy returned to his science kit. Both his mother and father sat down on the floor beside him and watched his movements.

"Well thank god he got my brains," his mother said with a cheeky wink in his father's direction.

"Yeah, but he got my good looks." His dad laughed when his mom punched him playfully on the arm. "What are you working on, son?" he asked then, leaning in closer to investigate the collection of tubes and vials.

"An important experiment," the boy replied.

"I can see that. Well, will your experiment be finished before dinner?"

"That depends," the boy responded.

"On what?" his father countered.

"On what we're having for dinner."

His parents laughed. "He really did get your brains, darlin'," his father said then ruffled the dark hair on the boy's head. "Well, since your mother finally finished her project, and since you're obviously on the way to discovering the cure to cancer or whatever it is you’re doing, perhaps we could go out tonight for a special dinner."
"Can I pick the place?" he asked in a wheedling tone.

"I don't know, son," his father said. "This is supposed to be your mother's reward, remember?"

The boy sighed and gave his mom what she called his "lost puppy dog look." "Aw, come on, Mom. Can I pick the restaurant? Pleeeeeaaasssseeee?"
His mother smiled at him. He loved his mother's smile. It was so beautiful and kind. His mother was the best mother a kid could have. His father was pretty great too.

"Well, I guess you can pick," his mother said finally with a laugh. "As long as it isn't that place with all the messy burgers." Her tone was one of mock horror.

"But Mom! You know that's my favorite restaurant!" They all laughed. Of course it was, and of course they'd go there tonight.

His father stood, then lifted the young boy up into his strong arms and held him against his chest. The boy wrapped his legs around his dad's waist and let him hold him. His father then pulled his mother up from her sitting position and wrapped an arm around her slender waist, pulling her close.

The young boy smiled. He felt so warm, so cared for, so loved. His family was the best family in the world.

 

Caleb awoke from the dream with a start. He sat there in silence, breathing heavily. Then he noticed a weight in his arms and looked over, finding Dani snuggled into his chest. His arms were wrapped tightly around her, and a smile was on her innocent face. He loved her so much then, he thought his heart would explode from the fierceness of the emotion.

Caleb turned his mind back to the dream. It had started like all the others, but instead of violence, instead of death, he'd found only love. Was it an omen, a premonition of his future with the beautiful woman by his side? The dark-eyed young boy had surely looked like a combination of his and Dani's features.

The thought of a child both terrified and exhilarated him. As he'd never expected to fall in love, never expected to have a relationship, he'd definitely never expected to have a child, or a family of his own. And yet, the feelings brought on by the dream were so strong, it warmed his heart.

Caleb allowed himself to consider the possibility of being with Dani forever. They'd get married and start a family. She would be a wonderful mother, and he would learn to be a good father. He wouldn't let them end up like his parents. No, they couldn't. Dani was nothing like his mother. She was love and light, and their children would be the luckiest kids on the planet.

He snuggled in deeper, pulling her closer and resting his head on the top of hers. Caleb inhaled deeply, breathing in her fresh, delicate scent. He couldn't get enough of this woman in his arms. His grip tightened and she squirmed, turning around to gently nuzzle at his neck. He felt desire stirring within him again and he couldn't believe his sudden reversal of fortune.

Sometimes you had to risk it all for the chance of something spectacular. Caleb was glad that Dani had shown him that.

The night was still dark around them and Caleb could hear the crash of the waves against the beach. He thought about the other nights they'd spent together, nights that had ended in him pushing Dani away, of him leaving and turning his back on her love. That kind of bullshit would never happen again. Now that he'd found his home, he'd never leave it. He would cherish the love that had found him, forever.

Closing his eyes, Caleb allowed himself to relax into a deep and dreamless sleep.

And in the morning, he was there beside her when she woke. And he would continue to be there for the rest of their lives together.