Chapter 25
Beau
“Is the Principal in, Rebecca?” I asked the secretary clicking away at the keyboard of her computer. She glanced up, her fingers still flying across the keys without looking down.
“Mr. Moreau.” She greeted me with a smile. “How is the school year treating you so far?”
I returned her smile, trying not to show how nervous I was. “It’s okay. You know kids will be kids.”
She rolled her eyes. “Tell me about it. I see them walk by here every single day. Always the same ones getting into trouble.” She stopped typing and snapped her fingers. “Drat, you didn’t stop by to chat with me but to see Mr. McLean. He was on a call just now. Let me check if he’s available.”
“Thanks.”
I rocked back on the heels of my shoes while she went to poke her head into the principal’s office. I had no idea if he would even listen to what I had to say, but I had to at least try for Gordon’s sake. He didn’t know I was planning to lobby on his son’s behalf to get him to graduate, but I felt it was the right thing to do. The suspension from school which would mar his record anyway should be enough. The school had to take into consideration his circumstance. He’d just lost his mother and was acting out. Not to mention Gordon had explained the boy was gay. The kid didn’t seem like he was handling it well at all.
If only Gordon found the courage to tell him the truth, but he insisted that he would just let down the kid. As far as I saw it, the longer he kept it a secret, the more complicated it got, especially now Oliver had given his own sexuality away. The least Gordon could do to give his son some measure of comfort was to open up to him.
“You may go in,” Rebecca told me, reclaiming her seat. She lowered her voice in a conspiratorial whisper. “Between us, he’s not in the best of moods so you may want to keep it short.”
I nodded. “Thanks. That helps.” I didn’t plan to invite myself to lunch anyway, just to give him my opinion then leave.
I knocked once on the office door before I entered, closing the door behind me. Principal McLean glanced up from his desk, and his face was etched in a scowl.
“Mr. Moreau, what can I do for you?” he asked. “If it’s to ask how the Mattis boy’s case is going, we’re still working on it. We’ll have a disciplinary hearing with him and his father next week and make an official decision on what we are going to do.”
“That’s exactly what I wanted to talk to you about, sir,” I answered, approaching his desk. “At the time when I brought in Oliver Mattis, I had no idea who he was. I found out later that he lost his mother under tragic circumstances. Given the case, I think it’s worth it to extend some measure of leniency towards him.”
He frowned at me. “You think we are too hard on him?”
“Given the circumstances, yes,” I answered. “He is going through a devastating time and has personal issues he’s dealing with. His mother died around this time last year.”
“His father got through to you, didn’t he?” he demanded. “Gordon Mattis knew his words would hold no sway with me, so he turned to you to ask you to plead his son’s case.”
“Gordon has no idea I am here,” I answered with honesty.
His frown deepened even more. “And what’s your connection to Gordon? Is there something I should know?”
As I only served him in a professional capacity, I couldn’t see how my romance with Gordon was any of his business, so I declined to comment on it.
“This is concerning Oliver,” I said. “He’s been through a lot, Mr. McLean. I don’t think taking away his graduation will be an effective strategy for reform.”
“I don’t get it, Mr. Moreau. Yesterday you were singing a different tune. Now today you’ve changed the song altogether. Well, it’s out of my hands. The disciplinary committee has already been apprised of the situation, and his name is one that we’ll be dealing with. Rest assured, his behavior during your substitution isn’t the sole reason he is being brought before the committee. Before your incident, Oliver has had a long list of infractions. There are only so many detentions and suspensions that we can give before taking serious action. It’s out of your control.”
“I ask you to reconsider, sir,” I told him. “He’s a child who needs help more than anything. I was wrong for not inquiring about the circumstance of the student in question before I brought him in.”
“It’s a little too late for the regrets, Mr. Moreau. I do believe you have a class coming up in the next ten minutes, don’t you?”
I read his message loud and clear. I was dismissed. Disappointed that I had failed Gordon, I moved towards the door to let myself out of the office.
“Mr. Moreau.”
I turned to Mr. McLean, hopeful that he had changed his mind. “Yes, sir?”
For a few seconds, he just stared at me as though mulling over what he was trying to say. “I’ve no interest whatsoever in what you do in your personal time,” he said, weighing his words. “I truly do not want to know. Our school is founded on strong moral principles, and we’d like it to remain the same. Your contract stipulates that it can be terminated with immediate effect if it’s deemed that you have violated or sullied the reputation of this school in any form. Please see to it that you don’t. Your job depends on it.”
There was no use in pretending I didn’t understand his threat. The man was threatening my job because of my sexuality. Yet, he was mindful of doing it in such a diplomatic way that I would have no solid evidence that he was referring to my preference in a partner. I couldn’t say I was shocked. Not after experiencing firsthand how strongly Eric had felt about Gordon and me being in love. Could Gordon be right and this town was not ready for us?
I nodded, and without a word left the office to head for my next class. I was full of worry and now undecided about my fate here in this country. It was my goal to end up with a permanent teaching position on staff once my two-year tenure ended. Up until this minute, I’d have thought I had a good shot at being re-hired, but now I had to pause and think about it. The principal carried a lot of clout in this school, and if he didn’t want me to continue with the school, it would be quite easy enough to get rid of me.
If I lost my job, I would have no access to Gordon. Trying to find another teaching job that would sponsor me may take a long time to come through. More than likely, I’d also have to return to France while the paperwork was being processed. I couldn’t leave Gordon now after everything. For the first time, I had a shot with a great guy. He also needed me around to center him as much as I needed him. He made me feel valuable while I was getting there on my own.
The rest of the day went by slowly. I couldn’t wait for it to end, and when it finally did, I had only half an hour to grade papers before I had to go to the community center. I tried calling Gordon to find out how he was doing and if he had spoken to Oliver yet, but he didn’t answer. I decided to leave my car parked at the school and walk the short distance to the community center, so I could clear my head a bit. I needed to concentrate on this play. I had secured an opening night which was still about a month away. We needed the time to work on everything from the stage, props, and costumes.
The play was an original script I wrote. The original featured a gay male character and was modeled off Oliver Twist. Given the nature of the play and the kids, I had decided at the last minute to change it. At times I wished I hadn’t but knew I wouldn’t have received the support I now had.
Practice went well. Charlie was coming into her own and chatting up other kids who were a part of our production. She was incredibly useful and insightful. Not only did she plunge into her small part with enthusiasm, but she also supported the others. I also learned that she had great ideas but was usually too timid or soft-spoken to voice them.
As usual, being a part of the drama production brought me to life, and I was able to forget about the problems that had nagged me throughout the day. The kids made my play come alive, and I was moved by their efforts to get it right. I had to still correct stage directions, especially getting them to project to the audience, but everyone was fitting into their new characters well. I’d challenged them to stick to their roles once they entered the auditorium we used to practice, and which we would set up for the night of the play. At one point I had thought of making the admission free, but then changed to a five-dollar cost that could be handed over to the community center when we were through, to help to further advance the community theater.
“Another amazing rehearsal, guys,” I encouraged them at the end. “Keep up the good work.”
The best part for me about them working on the play was seeing how they transformed. In the beginning, there had been skirmishes, but those had been squashed by the need to work together. I didn’t even need to point out anymore how valuable each character was, regardless of the role they played.
“Mr. Moreau.”
I shook off my thoughts as Charlie ran up to me. She was smiling, something Gordon would be happy to see. Now if only things would work out between him and Oliver.
“Yes, Charlie?”
“My dad’s supposed to pick me up,” she answered. “But I’m getting a lift with friends, and we may stop for a bite to eat on the way home. I'm trying to call him, but his phone is off. Can you let him know please if you’re still around when he drops by?”
“Sure thing.”
“Thanks, sir.”
She ran off before I could even tell her she was welcome. Seeing the twinkle in her eyes and the pep in her step was short of amazing. I glanced at my watch and noticed it was already six thirty. While waiting for Gordon to drop by, I climbed onto the stage and started reciting lines from Macbeth, one of my favorite Shakespearean plays.
The second Gordon entered the auditorium I knew. I could feel his energy. Glancing over my shoulder, I smiled at him. He smiled back and approached the stage slowly. His smile didn’t fully reach his eyes though, and that bothered me. I wanted back the Gordon who had been making great strides in our relationship. He looked exhausted, with lines on his face. I bet he didn’t get much sleep last night. He hadn’t stayed over, and after frantically having sex, he’d returned to his place, leaving me feeling alone. I wanted more from him, but how selfish of me to even ask about us in a time like this. We hadn’t been dating for long either, so we could wait. My heart was impatient though.
“Hey there, handsome,” I greeted him, extending a hand to boost him up onto the stage with me. He didn’t hesitate but took the outstretched hand. With both our strengths combined, we managed to pull him up onto the stage in one smooth motion. I didn’t let him go until he was face to face with me. I loved him so goddamn much it hurt to think of a future without him.
“Hi, where’s everyone?” he asked.
“They already left,” I answered, taking his other hand into mine. “Charlie got a lift with some friends from here. They are stopping to get food then they’ll drop her home.”
His shoulders visibly relaxed at this announcement. “Great. She’s finally making friends and being active again. That’s thanks to you and what you’ve been doing here. I know you look out for her because she’s my kid.”
“She’s going to be alright,” I assured him.
“Yeah, it’s just Ollie I have to worry about.” He sighed, and I wanted to take his burden and work it out for him. I knew what I would do in his situation, but I wouldn’t force the issue. Oliver was his child, and the decision was his solely to make.
“Have you decided if you’re going to talk to him?”
“I have to talk to him,” he answered. “I have to. I just don’t know what I’m going to say yet.”
I didn’t want him to see my disappointment, so I tried a smile. “I’m sure the right words will come at the right time.”
“Now you’re low key upset with me, aren’t you?”
“Not upset. Maybe a little disappointment. I want to have an open relationship with you, Gordon. I want to be free to hold your hand and kiss you in public. I don’t want to pretend we are just friends, but one thing my experience with your friend has taught me is to understand where you are coming from. So, I do understand the caution with which you are proceeding. Hell, I may not even have a job soon."
His eyes widened, and a look of panic crossed his face. “What do you mean? I thought your contract was open for a year and then renewable after.”
“It is but there are also clauses that indicate situations in which I can be fired.”
He scoffed. “You’re a great teacher. Why would they want to get rid of you?”
I didn’t answer, just stared back at him. He would get the answer soon enough. “They can’t do that!” he blurted out. “That’s discrimination because of your sexuality.”
“It’s easy to get rid of a teacher you don’t want around. Just find a fault and constantly nag about it.”
“Would you have to return to France if that happened?”
“Yeah, I would.”
Gordon’s hand crushed mine. “I won’t let that happen. You’re not going anywhere.”
“It won’t be your call, Gordon.” I didn’t want us to have false hopes, but I understood his fear because I harbored the same. Neither of us was willing to let go if I lost my job.
“You don’t get it, Beau,” he said. “I can’t lose you. Before that happens, I’d marry you.”
I gasped at his words. “Don’t be ridiculous. This is all just hypothetical anyway. I’m sure I’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.”
Still, I was touched by his words even though they had only been prompted because he was caught up in the moment. It wasn’t a real proposal, and yet the word was on the tip of my tongue to tell him yes. His eyes looked uncertain, and his mouth worked, but no words were spoken. I didn’t want to hear him tell me that he had spoken in haste.
I did the one thing I knew how to shut him up. I cupped the back of his head and kissed him.