Chapter 28
Gordon
“Please leave your message—”
I hung up before the voicemail could complete, and threw the phone onto my desk. I’d lost count of the number of times I’d rang Ollie. I had barely slept a wink last night, ringing his phone, dropping by his friends' homes late at night, and being given the cold shoulder. At the time, I’d been too worried about him to give a rat’s ass what my neighbors or anyone else thought of me. All I had been concerned about was getting my son home and safe.
After driving all over the neighborhood without any success, I’d finally crawled back home. I’d tried going to sleep, talking myself into believing wherever he was, he would be safe. He was a smart guy when he wasn’t busy doing stupid things like getting drunk. Thoughts had flooded my mind of all the things that could go wrong that night, and there went my ability to sleep.
How could everything be such a mess? I’d gone from losing my wife, but having both kids, to losing everything. The only constant in my life which remained unchanged from the world’s discovery of my sexual orientation was work. Everything had gone according to plan. The men had been briefed on their job description before they hit the road. That had gone better than I had thought it would have. I’d sensed unease in the men, but they had smartly not said anything. I didn’t expect them to. After all, I was the one who signed their hefty paychecks at the end of every week.
A knock sounded on my door. “I’m busy!” I yelled, though I hadn’t completed one single thing since I’d slammed the office door shut this morning. Several checks remained on my desk to be signed, but the pen was still on top of the first one in the stack. How could I get any work done when my whole life had turned upside down? My son was missing, my daughter had walked by me this morning and informed me a friend was dropping her off at school, and I’d erected a wall between myself and the man I loved. I failed to see how my life could get any worse than that.
Despite me yelling that I was busy, the door creaked open. I spun around in my chair to tell off whoever had disturbed me. I sighed when I realized it was only Glenna. She approached my desk, a cup of coffee perched on a saucer in her hand.
“I thought you could use this,” she said and placed the saucer on my desk. “You don’t look like you slept any at all last night.”
“Barely,” I answered and reached for the cup gratefully. “Thank you, Glenna. You always seem to know what I need. You were most helpful to me when Barb died.”
She smiled at me. “You’re too hard on yourself, Gordon. Stop trying to please everyone so much.”
I frowned at her behind the cup. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you’ve been so happy in the past few weeks,” she replied. “You may not have noticed, but I rarely ever heard you laugh before or saw you smile. Since lately, you’ve taken to smiling more. It suits you.”
All because of Beau. I dropped my gaze to the murky liquid in the cup. Did Glenna know what had happened? I doubted it. She was old school. If she found out, she would probably quit her job.
“Whatever it takes,” she told me, stepping back for the door. “Don’t lose that smile.”
I sat at my desk, a long time after she left, and pondered what she said. Snatching my phone from the desk, I found the video of Beau and me kissing. I watched it over and over, studying our faces, how comfortable we were with each other. I examined the way I smiled at Beau and the way he lit up as we talked. I remembered the little moans he made in his throat when we kissed.
Glenna was right. The happiness I experienced with Beau was rare. Yet, I was torn. I couldn’t dismiss the way my kids felt about us. I wished there were answers written somewhere that I could access. I was selfish enough to want both my kids and Beau in my life. Why should I have to give up either? In a couple of years, the kids would be gone and then, what would I be left with?
I plunged into work, occupying my mind with other less painful thoughts. Sometime after three in the afternoon, I drove by the house to check if Ollie had dropped by, but saw no evidence that anyone had been there after I locked up that morning. Unable to take the suspense for much longer, I drove into the police station on the way back to work. I was hungry, and my gut was twisting from both fear and the lack of food, but I couldn’t make myself eat a bite. Not in my current state.
Once at the police station, I hoped neither Eric nor any of his friends were around. I would have never dropped by after what they had done to Beau, but I couldn’t allow my pride to come in the way. I needed to find my son and bring him home. I needed to know that he was alive and alright.
At the front desk, I was assigned a police officer who asked me what I wanted. After informing her that my son was missing, she asked me to sit in the waiting area, and she would be with me shortly to take my statement. I waited for almost an hour, my knees bouncing in agitation. I had just risen to my feet to return to the front desk to ask what was taking so long, when I spotted Drew in his uniform. He looked as though he was about to start his shift.
“Gordon?” he asked in surprise, heading for me. “Is something wrong? Why are you here?” He lowered his voice, glancing around him. “Did Eric try something again?”
I shook my head. “No, the son-of-a-bitch knew better to stay far away after what he did to Beau.”
“Then what’s the problem? Is it Beau?”
Thank God. At least someone hadn’t seen the video. “Is there somewhere we can go to speak in private?” I asked him.
He nodded. “Sure. We can use one of the interrogation rooms. Follow me.”
I followed him stiffly, uncomfortable in the environment even though it should have been one of those zones where a person should feel safe. After the way Eric had violated our rights, I was uneasy being in the police station.
Drew led me into an interrogation room, thankfully different from the one where they had held Beau. He gestured for me to sit, but I chose to stand. I didn’t want to overstay my welcome.
“So, tell me. What’s up?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest.
“My son’s missing,” I answered.
He frowned. “Missing? For how long?”
As briefly as possible, I explained to him about our argument and Ollie storming out of the house. I detailed the search I had done for him and still no result.
“Man, that’s tough. I’m so sorry.”
I shrugged. “At this point, everything else can wait. I just need to find my son.”
“How old is he?” Drew asked, removing a small notepad and a pen.
“Seventeen.”
“Shit.”
“What is it?” I had a feeling he was about to deliver news I wouldn’t like.
“We have no legal jurisprudence over a seventeen-year-old runaway,” he answered. “At that age, the law considers them responsible enough to leave home if they so choose.”
I stared at him in shock. “Tell me this is a joke. He’s not an adult!”
“I’m sorry. We can’t pick-up a seventeen-year-old.”
“But he’s missing,” I argued. “While I don’t understand why my seventeen-year-old child should be allowed to leave home and the law can’t do anything about it, I have no idea where he is, if he is hurt or even alive!” The last word came out choked with emotions. “What am I supposed to do? Just sit around and wait for nothing?”
“Maybe he just needs time to calm down, and he’ll return home.”
“And in the meantime, I’m supposed to fold my hands and not worry?” I snapped, heading for the door. “I thought the police was supposed to be here to serve and protect. Since my run in with you guys, all you’ve done is screw me over. Is it so much to ask you to help me to find my son?”
“Gordon, wait.” I paused and turned to hear him out. “Since no one knows his whereabouts, we can probably act, not in the capacity of a runaway but a missing person. I’ll get on it along with some of the guys who are trustworthy.”
“Thank you. That’s all I can ask.”
“Do you have a recent picture of him?”
“On my phone.”
“Here’s my number. Send it to me.”
I sent him a picture I had of Ollie from the mardi gras in New Orleans. Oh, how time flew by.
“I must warn you that we may not be able to take him in,” he answered. “The most I can do for you perhaps is locate him and let you know where he is. Unless he’s involved in illegal activity, once we locate him, we’ll have to treat the case as a runaway and leave him alone.”
I nodded, willing to accept that. “That’ll do. I just want to know he’s okay and to talk to him.”
“I’ll try my best to locate him.”
We walked from the interrogation room together, and I was feeling much better until we ran into none other than Eric. I tried to side-step the fucker, but he blocked my way, forcing a confrontation. He glanced from Drew to me suspiciously.
“Fancy seeing you two together,” he commented. “Gordon, I heard you finally became famous with your sex tape.”
My hands balled into fists, but I refused to let him goad me into a physical display of anger. I still hadn’t forgiven him for the way he had treated Beau and me. But, I was on his turf and getting into a fight here with him would be the biggest mistake I could ever make.
Drew stepped between us. “Gordon’s son is missing, and that’s why he’s here.”
“Can’t blame the kid,” Eric stated, then lowered his voice. “Must be humiliating to know his dad takes it in the ass. Or do you give it? Hell, I don’t even wanna know.”
“Eric, cut it out,” Drew said. “That’s enough.”
“It’s fine, Drew,” I replied, giving him a grateful smile. “The ignorant usually talk the most and the loudest. Thanks again for your help and I’ll keep in touch.”
I walked by the two men and left the police station. I was relieved Eric wasn’t the one working on my case. I didn’t doubt he would make no effort to find Ollie. And to think he had named our kid. Barbara and I as first-time parents had struggled to come up with a name. Until Eric had yelled at us, “For God’s sake, name the kid Oliver.” Losing him as a friend had been a significant loss, and I missed his friendship, but there was no place in my life for someone like him.