Chapter 4
Gordon
“You can park right here.”
My hands shook as I parked the truck and removed the key from the ignition. How the hell did I end up here at this stranger’s apartment building? It’s not too late. You can turn back now. My apprehension waved red flags at me but my curiosity won the moment.
“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to,” Beau said softly, reaching across the console to pat my thigh. “I can always say ‘thanks for the lift’ and then we part ways.”
I turned my head to peer at him in the semi-darkness of the truck. “Is that what you want to do?” I cleared my throat because my question came out gravelly. “You want me to go?”
“Hell no!” he answered, then went silent. Neither of us made any move to get out of the truck. His arm remained on my thigh, branding me with his touch. Desire flared in the pit of my belly, and I wished I didn’t have on my jeans. What would his hand feel like on my naked thigh? “I want to say something to you, but I don’t want to scare you off before I even get to kiss you.”
I couldn’t help it. My sharp intake of breath filled the truck. I expelled it just as loudly. “Tell me.” I needed to hear him say it.
“I was interested from the moment you walked into the bar,” he said. “The chemistry I feel between us is amazing. Don’t you think?”
“Yes.” I might have been scared, but I couldn’t lie. I felt the pull between us and it intrigued me enough that here I was even though I had no goddamn idea what I was doing.
He flashed one of those smiles of his that made me want to forget all inhibitions and pull him to my side of the truck. I wondered how he would react if I did that. I had a feeling he would enjoy it, but I was too much of a coward to follow through on my thoughts.
“Then, let’s go.”
He reached out to open the car door and I closed my hand over his to stall him. “Wait.”
“What is it?”
I glanced away from him. “I’ve never done this before, Beau.”
“I know, and that’s fine.”
“What I’m trying to say is that I don’t want to fuck up tonight. I can’t—” I swallowed hard, anxiety twisting my gut. “I can’t promise you how I’ll feel or what I’ll do when we step into your apartment.”
“Then there’s only one way to find out.”
I opened my mouth to ask him to what he was referring. His lips descended on mine and swallowed the words. His hands fisted in the front of my shirt, pulling me harder against him. Stunned, I didn’t react for a few seconds before heat filled my belly and overpowered any doubt. I angled my lips better over his, resting my hands on his ribcage as I kissed him back.
If I thought he was going to initiate me slowly, I was wrong. He kissed me hard, his moans filling my mouth. Beneath my heavy lids, I saw the pleasure on his face. It fueled my own and cast away my last inhibitions. With a groan, I pressed him back into the door, shifting closer to him. I released his lips as we gasped for air, but not for long. Our lips crashed into each other’s again and I sunk my teeth into his plump bottom lip. He moaned, running his hands over my chest. In my jeans, my cock was so fucking erect that it was painful. Each stroke of his hand lit the embers of passion. His tongue plunged into my mouth, fanning those flames. His tongue retreated, and I followed a bit more timidly at first. He sucked my tongue into his mouth, using his to toy with mine.
Our lips slowed as I sensed him retreating. I pulled away slightly, but he captured my lips again, like a prize he desperately sought. His exuberance floored me.
“Fuck!” I gasped when he released my lips at last. I leaned forward and placed my forehead against his. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” I wasn’t much of a swearer, especially around the kids but the guys at my trucking company rubbed off on me.
Beau chuckled in amusement. “I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Come on. Let’s go up to my apartment. You’ve given me a boner, and you better take care of it too.”
Fear of the unknown streaked through me again, but I nodded. I had no idea how far I would go with him, but I couldn’t stop at this kiss in the truck. I couldn’t let him walk away like this. I needed something more that I hadn’t found yet.
Together we entered the apartment building, walking side by side. The urge to hold his hand was great. I stuffed my hands into my front pockets to squelch the urge. Besides my kids, I’d never been a big hand holder, so I was in awe that I wanted to hold his.
His apartment building was small, only three stories. He swiped us in, and we moved toward the elevator from which a couple walked. They glanced at Beau and me. I almost froze, wondering if they could tell what we were up to. They didn’t pay us any mind. I was paranoid about nothing.
We rode the elevator in silence. When we arrived on the top floor, this time, Beau grabbed hold of my hand and pulled me along with him. His eagerness turned me on. I went willingly, trailing behind him a little. I stared at his broad back and down to his round ass in his pants. They were perfect globes that I wanted to grab. My palms started to sweat.
He released my hand to unlock the door to his apartment. He pushed it open and stepped inside ahead of me. He flicked the lights on, and I hesitated outside. He angled his head towards me. “Come on. I think I have beer in the fridge.”
I had no clue what I thought would happen when we entered his apartment, but it wasn’t drinking beer. I’d been thinking more of zippers going down, shoes coming off and facing each other buck naked. No wonder I was tense. I stepped inside before Beau got tired of waiting for me to make up my mind. I was already here so I might as well wing it.
His apartment was compact and perfect for a single person. The floor was open spacing with the kitchen off to the right. The living room was off to the left. To one side was a dining area set up with just two chairs. In the living room, he had a huge television on the wall. I could make out a gaming system and sound system as well. A bookshelf stood at one end with books neatly organized with their spines to me. The coffee table in the center had the remote control and some magazines thrown haphazardly onto it. The couches were sturdy but either he had bought the set second-hand or he’d received the apartment fully furnished.
“Nice,” I said because I felt compelled to speak. I didn’t know if it was the right thing to say, but at least I broke the ice.
He laughed. “You’re a horrible liar. This place is way too small, but it’s what I can afford at the moment. Plus, it’s all mine. I’ve never had a place just all mine before.”
A look of panic crossed his face and he looked away before leading the way to the kitchen. I frowned and followed him. Had he just shared something personal about himself then regretted it? Interesting. And here we were both acting like I was the only one with problems. That look spoke to me. He had secrets hiding too. I wanted to know them, to understand him.
“Get the beer from the fridge, will you?” he asked. “I need to take a leak.”
He started by me but then stopped and pressed his lips to mine. I was getting ready to kiss him back when he released my lips and winked at me. “Soon. Don’t miss me too much.”
I rolled my eyes at him while smiling. His lighthearted nature put me at ease in his presence. I didn’t feel like we were about to fuck each other’s brains out. I sensed friendship. I paused with the door to the fridge open and mulled it over. Did I want him for a friend or just company for the night? I would have no idea until after what we would do.
Retrieving two bottles of beer from the fridge, I searched for an opener and found it in his cupboard which was almost bare. Just like his fridge. Other than bottles of water, croutons, shredded lettuce, some lunch meat and bottles of beer, he had nothing else worth eating. I opened both bottles then took them out to the living room along with paper towel. I placed the napkins on top of the coffee table to prevent water stain then put the bottles on them.
Glancing around his apartment, I tried to find any personal trinkets of his that would give me a more intimate glimpse into Beau’s life. There were no pictures which I found odd. Barbara and I had decorated our home with framed photographs of the family. I walked over to his video game and checked out his stash. I hadn’t played in forever. Family and responsibilities hadn’t left me with much time for playing games. At first, I’d sold my video game to aid in the purchase of Barbara’s wedding ring when I was twenty. When I was that young and scared shitless that the girl I’d slept with was pregnant with my baby, I’d done the right thing and married her. I’d been eager to do it too since I’d thought a regular lifestyle with my wife would stop my fantasies about other boys.
I replaced the game I was looking at when I heard shuffling behind me. I turned to Beau who had not only used the restroom but also changed. He was wearing gray sweats draped low on his hips and an older, more comfortable T-shirt. He looked sexy, relaxed and at home. He’d even ruffled his hair giving him a tousled look.
“I love the way you fuck me with your eyes,” he said calmly. “If it means anything to you, I want it to happen too.”
I closed my eyes. “The way you say things like that…”
“Yes?”
Hearing his response closer to me, I cracked my eyes opened. There he was, an arm’s length away. “And I want to kiss you again,” I ended.
“By all means, help yourself.”
I expected him to come to me just as he had initiated our contact every other time. He didn’t. I was faced with a choice, walking away or kissing those addictive lips of his. Decision made, I closed the gap between us and approached him. Without saying a word, he took both my arms and placed them around his waist. I automatically pulled him towards me until we bumped, chest to chest. His lips were right below mine, so I dipped my head while he cocked his to one side. When our lips met, relief that I hadn’t gone home washed over me. I tightened my arms around his waist, deepening the kiss. Now that I was getting used to his lips on mine, I kissed him harder, deeper, sweeping my tongue into his mouth.
Beau reached for my shirt and with nimble fingers released the buttons. I concentrated on the kiss and the sound of our wet kisses filling the room. Once he had all the buttons undone, he pushed my shirt from my chest. As I wore no undershirt, he met bare muscles and hard-washed abs when his hands returned to my physique.
I moaned at the tracing of his fingers over the ridges of my body.
“Fuck!” I tore my mouth away from his and groaned when his fingers teased my nipples. Electricity shot through me, followed by a chill as goose pimples broke out on my skin.
“Ooh you have sensitive nipples,” Beau said with a smile. “Do you have any other sensitive body parts I should know of?”
“My cock?”
He laughed, which surprised me, and I didn’t know how to take it. Were we making love or what? I’d never laughed during lovemaking before. I’d have thought laughing at such a time would kill the moment. I froze, not sure what to do.
“Don’t worry, it’s fun to discover these places,” Beau remarked, pushing me towards the couch to sit. He straddled my lap, and I placed my hand behind him instinctively to balance him. Beau wasn’t as heavy as I’d assumed he would be. He shuffled forward and pressed a kiss to my neck. It was to be the first kiss in a hot trail he blazed over my chest. His tongue found the right nipple, and he flicked it over the bud. I gasped, leaning against the back of the couch. He circled my nipple with his tongue, enclosed his mouth over the nipple and tugged gently.
“Beau,” I moaned. “Oh shit.”
He moved on to the next nipple, his hand running between our bodies to grab my cock through the denim material. He squeezed, and stars exploded like the Fourth of July had decided to come early this year. My cock jerked, hardening even more, but when he reached for my zipper, I panicked.
“Wait.”
Beau immediately stopped and raised his eyes to me. “Too much too soon?”
I nodded. “Sorry.”
He pressed a kiss to my throat. “Not one damn thing to be sorry for Gordon, but I’ve an idea.”
He slid off my knees and reached a hand out to me. I grasped it and he tugged me to my feet.