CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Ky
I pulled up to the compound and skidded to a halt. With fire running through my veins, I flicked the kickstand down and jumped off my bike. Then I went tearing into the clubhouse.
I had no idea where I’d find Mouse right then, but I fucking dared anyone to step in my way.
“Ky?” Knight said my name like a question. Like he could almost read my mind.
I was sure the way my chest was puffed out and my body was vibrating was a dead give away that something was up.
“Where the fuck is Mouse?” I pretty much demanded through gritted teeth.
His eyes narrowed at me and I turned and kept on moving further into the clubhouse. I knew Knight was hot on my trail and probably anyone else who’d seen me storming it. I rounded the corner to the kitchen and there he was, just making a fucking cup of coffee like any other day.
“The fuck is wrong with you?” I roared and because I couldn’t stop myself, I threw a punch at his face as he turned around.
“Fuck,” he said as hot coffee splashed all over both of us and the cup slid from his hand. “God fucking dammit, Ky.”
I grabbed his cut in order to keep myself from throwing another punch to his fucking face.
“Why? What the fuck were you thinking when you showed her that place?”
His hands came up and with a force that surprised me, he shoved me away. My left fist curved up, catching him just under the chin and making his head snap back.
He caught me with a right hook to the jaw.
Then it was on. I wasn’t sure which one of us tackled the other, but somehow we both ended up rolling around on the ground, trying to get hits in while the fucking shards of the ceramic mug sliced our exposed skin.
“E-fucking-nough!” Iron’s voice roared out over the chaos.
We both froze then pushed off of each other. My back slammed against the bottom cabinets as I flopped back on my ass.
My chest heaved as I looked over at Mouse with fire in my eyes. I wiped the blood from my lip with the back of my hand. Shit. That hurt like hell. Damn, I knew my face was going to look like shit for the next few days. Chris was going to be pissed and I hated that he would be disappointed with me. But the damage was done and as I studied Mouse, I could see that he hadn’t fared any better.
Iron didn’t say another word. He just walked to the refrigerator, pulled out two beers, then walked over to us. As he uncapped one of the bottles, I looked up at him with regretful eyes. I reached up and took it from his outstretched hand. Then he did the same to the other, handing it to Mouse.
“Fix your shit, then fix this shit,” he said pointing to the mess on the floor. Without another word, he turned on his heels and walked out of the kitchen, nodding to the others to follow him out.
The silence was suffocating. I was still angry but it was starting to fade.
“Why?” I asked on a heavy sigh.
“Because she seemed lost. Alone. I was trying to help her.”
“You think it’s going to help for her to leave? To be away from me? From Chris? From her fucking family?” The anger was coming back but I kept my ass planted on the ground.
“I don’t want her to go. I don’t want her that far away, where we can’t watch over her and Chry. But it’s not about what I want, Ky. Or you for that matter. It’s about what Ingram needs. And it sounds like she needs to not feel like an outsider. She needs to be around people that understand what she’s going through, right now. She needs time and a safe place where she can accept everything that’s happened to her and figure out her own way of how to move on.”
He was almost yelling at me and I imagined that if we’d been standing, he would have been up in my face, making sure I really heard his words.
“And she needs to do that away from you, away from here, because she needs the space to breathe and not feel like she’s letting anyone down,” he went on, the grip on his bottle tightening. “She loves you. You’re her only family now. But you have to give her the space to figure things out on her own.”
All the air left my lungs. It was hard to hear but I heard every fucking word. I took them in and let them rattle around in my brain until they all took root. He was right. I may not have liked it. I may not have wanted her to go. But I had to give her the room to fly or I would end up being the thing that crushed her.
I took in a deep breath, holding it for a few good long beats, then let it out slowly.
“Tell me about this place.”
So then he did.
Sliding up beside me, he pulled out his phone and brought up all the information he had saved on the place. He had Cable do some digging to make sure it was legit. And it was. Glow Woods Sanctuary was actually first known for being an animal sanctuary. The lady that had started it wanted to combine her love of rescuing wildlife with her need to do the same to humans, in a way. I mean, it wasn’t put that way on the website, but that was what it boiled down to. She had been a social worker for fifteen years prior to opening up Glow Woods. She’d seen how abused and abandoned children had trouble after they had been taken away from their unsafe situations. She set up the farm as a place where they could go and feel safe. Where they could work through the things that they needed and have the guidance there to help them through it. It a sense, it was meant to be a bridge between what they were coming out of and the world that the rest of us knew.
It was perfect for Ingram’s situation.
Mouse was right, it was what she needed.
It wasn’t about what I wanted. It wasn’t about that scared feeling that shook me at the thought that I might lose her. That I wouldn’t be there to protect her. It wasn’t about her turning her back on her family. No, it was more about her wanting to find a way to be stronger for herself, for Chry, for us. It made sense. And had I taken a moment and gotten the information first, I probably would have seen that right away.
There were therapists and counselors. There were opportunities to heal and move on. To grow and find her true self. To work towards a goal of making it on her own.
“You can visit her whenever you want. It isn’t some lockdown place where you drop them off and never see them again. You can go up there, spend a day or two, play with your nephew and still get to see him grow. And it isn’t forever.” He looked at me and I nodded my head.
He was right. This was just a path in life, a step in the right direction. There was nothing saying that her path couldn’t come back around. It wasn’t permanent, it was just as long as she needed it.
“So…what do we do to get her in there?” I found myself asking with a heavy heart.
“I’ve already talked to the woman that runs it. Lily sounds sweet and caring. I explained a little of what Ingram’s situation is and she said that she believes that they could help walk her through everything, get Ingram to acknowledge the things that she was raised with and understand that she doesn’t have to believe those things.”
“Alright,” I said, my head bobbing absently as I processed everything. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, I get it,” he replied. “Have fun explaining that to Chris.” He chuckled and the back of my hand connected with his shoulder.
“Asshole,” I grumbled though he wasn’t wrong about that.
“You are calling me an asshole? That’s rich.” He may have been joking but he was right.
“I’m working on it,” I admitted with a shrug.
“Yeah, I see that. You bought him flowers, I hear.”
My head fell back as I laughed. Of course, that shit had gotten out and around. I wouldn’t doubt that the whole club knew.
“What can I say?” I got to my feet. “I like the guy.”
I didn’t even feel weird about admitting it to Mouse. Or out loud. I got it now, that they wouldn’t judge me.
“Now, let’s clean this shit up so I can go figure this stuff out,” I said as I went in search of a broom.
“I got this, brother. You go do what you need to do. I’m here if you need me,” he said with a clap on my back.
I dialed Chris as I walked up to the garage. I needed to get lost in something and clear my mind but I didn’t want to leave him hanging. I regretted the way I’d taken off this morning. I couldn’t fix that, but I could at least let him know everything was fine. Sort of. Good thing he couldn’t see my face right now. Shit. I wasn’t looking forward to that and no doubt that he would be on Mouse’s side. I should have taken a page out of his book and listened instead of jumping on my angry emotions. Anger that had been brought on by fear, maybe. Because I was scared for Ingram. I was scared about losing her and not being able to look out for her. I was scared that something might happen to her or Chry and I wouldn’t be around to watch out for them
“Is he dead?” Chris asked as he answered the phone.
I huffed out a laugh mostly out of nervousness. His tone was almost joking, which made me feel even more like shit.
“No,” I said and hung my head even though he couldn’t see it.
“You alright?”
“No,” I answered truthfully but didn’t bother to follow up with why. “I’m headed to the garage. I need to clear my head. Sort shit out and whatnot.”
“Okay,” he said like he wasn’t even going to argue or get me to talk. Another reason why this guy was so fucking perfect for me. He got me, even when I didn’t get myself. “Will you be home by dinner?”
“Yes, I will definitely be home in time for dinner.” I felt the smile spread across my face.
“Okay, then. I’ll see you later. We’re talking tonight,” he said like I didn’t have a choice.
And that was alright with me because I really did want to sit down with him and work this all out. I wanted us to look over the information together then go to Ingram with level heads, ready to figure out the next move.
My boots came to a halt a few feet away from the garage. My eyes moved to look at the sky, phone still glued to my ear though there was a silence lingering there.
“I’m glad I have you,” I breathed out. It came out so low that I wasn’t even sure that he’d heard me.
“I’m glad you finally let me in,” he said back, his voice much stronger than mine. “Do what you need to do. I’ll make lasagna.”
Then he was gone and I knew he didn’t hang up because he was mad. No, not Chris. He was giving me an out. I’d opened myself a little for a moment without him having to pull it out of me, and he knew that I wouldn’t be able to linger after. He gave me an out before I felt the need to take it.
Yeah, Chris was mine. I wasn’t going to give him up now that I had him. And I’d fucking fight anyone that tried to get in the way of that.