CHAPTER 33
KEVIN

 

“Chef!”

“Yes, sir?”

“I want a big breakfast for this morning,” I said. “An entire spread. Pancakes and fruit and eggs and bacon and all sorts of juices.”

“Are we celebrating something?” my chef asked.

“The future,” I said, as I headed for the stairs. “And don’t forget the coffee!”

I walked back up the stairs and went into the kids’ room. Brooke had fallen asleep next to Sydney last night and I didn’t have the heart to wake her. Sydney was curled up in Brooke’s arms and Daniel was reaching out toward them. His hand was across the entire aisle and rolled up in the back of Brooke’s shirt, trying to get some of her comfort as he slept all through the night.

It was a beautiful sight.

“Time to wake up,” I said, as I flipped on the light.

Everyone groaned, and I smiled as Brooke began to stir.

“Breakfast time,” I said. “In about thirty minutes.”

“Good. Can you turn that light off?” Brooke asked.

“No can do,” I said. “Thirty minutes!”

I went downstairs and set the table as I listened to everyone pad around upstairs. Water was running, and the kids were giggling and I could hear Brooke talking sweetly to them. It was music to my ears. The perfect sound to wake up to in the morning. They all came bounding down the stairs as Brooke ushered the twins into the kitchen and her eyes widened at all the food.

“Are we feeding an army?” she asked.

“You haven't seen these kids truly eat breakfast,” I said.

There were pancakes and syrups and eggs in every sort of way. Bacon and sausage and biscuits and jams and all sorts of sliced fruits. Four different fruit juices and a strong pot of coffee, and I watched Brooke in enjoyment as she took in how Sydney and Daniel inhaled their food.

“You weren’t joking,” she said.

“They have large appetites in the morning,” I said.

“Chef, how are these eggs cooked?” Brooke asked.

“Benedict,” he said.

“This white sauce is incredible.”

“That is a hollandaise sauce.”

“You’ll have to teach me your ways,” she said. “Then I could eat like a queen all the time.”

“Or you could come over more often and I could cook for you,” the chef said.

“You put him up to that, didn’t you?” she asked.

I held up my hands in mock surrender before I shot my chef a thumbs up and he offered me a wink in reply.

We ate more food than we could stand, but soon it was time to get the kids ready for school. I was helping to clean up the plates while Brooke got the kids upstairs. I was headed upstairs myself to clean up and get ready for work, but then a knock sounded at the door.

A resounding, angry knock.

“Kevin! Open up this damn door!”

Brooke’s eyes widened as the kids turned around at the sound.

I groaned as Sarah’s voice filtered through the door.

“I know you’re in there! Open up!”

“Take the kids upstairs and get them ready,” I said. “I’ll deal with her.”

“Is that—?”

“Yes. Now go upstairs. I don’t want them seeing this.”

“Daddy, is something wrong?” Daniel asked.

“Everything’s fine,” I said. “You and Sydney go upstairs and get ready for school.”

I had to admit, I felt guilty about the kids not knowing about their mother. When we got back from the island, I had promised myself I would tell them stories about her. But I wanted to see what she was like one on one before I introduced her to them in any way.

But ever since the therapy appointment, I hadn’t been taking Sarah’s calls. I wanted time for her to calm down before we talked.

I didn’t think she’d bring that anger to my house, though.

Proving my point that she was selfish and still not thinking of the kids.

“Open this door, Kevin!”

“Come on, kids. Let’s go get you dressed,” Brooke said.

I watched until they were all the way down the hallway, then I yanked open the front door.

“What?” I asked.

“Why haven’t you been taking my calls?” Sarah asked as she shoved her way into my home.

“Hey, you don’t have a right to barge in here without my permission,” I said.

“Why haven’t you been taking my calls?" she asked again. “You promised that I would get to talk to the kids.”

“I was giving you time to calm down after our therapy session.”

“Oh, you mean where you came in and berated me for twenty minutes before walking out and declaring it was over?” she asked.

“You know everything I said in there was right, whether you want to own up to it or not. And you storming up to my house and cussing at my door while the kids are here proves to me my suspicions are right. The only person you think about is yourself. It didn’t even occur to you that the kids were getting ready for school and are here to listen to you yell through the door!”

“I want to see my kids.”

“And when I decide it is a good time and we hammer out a legal agreement, you can,” I said.

“I want to see them now.”

“Not happening. Not when you’re this upset.”

“I’m upset because I can’t see my children, Kevin.”

“It hasn’t upset you for three-and-a-half years, Sarah. Why does it now?” I asked.

“When are you going to stop lording that over my head?”

“When you stop being so selfish!”

Sarah’s eyes wavered and her body pulled taut. I looked over my shoulder in the direction she was staring, and I saw Sydney at the top of the steps. No one could deny she was her mother’s child. The two of them looked more and more alike the older Sydney got. But then Brooke appeared and took Sydney’s hand to lead her off and I knew what was coming.

And I wasn’t going to tolerate it.

“Who the hell is that?” Sarah asked.

“That’s Brooke,” I said.

“What is she doing with my children?”

“Getting them ready for school.”

“Sleeping with your nanny?” she asked, a nasty expression on her face.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but she’s not the nanny. She’s the woman I love,” I said plainly.

It was as if my words had physically slapped Sarah across the face.

“That’s why you don’t want to work on things.”

“Partly,” I admitted.

“Admit it. From the moment you stepped into that doctor’s office, you had no intentions of fixing things with me.”

“You know, I actually did think about it. I thought about it for the sake of the kids. But the more I thought about it, the more I sat there and watched you, the more I knew it couldn’t happen. Not even for the kids. Because I don’t love you, Sarah. I never have, and I never will. I love Brooke, and I have for a long time, I realized. I’m sorry you don’t like it, but that’s the way it is.”

“You son of a bitch,” she shrieked, raising a hand to slap me.

I grabbed her wrist easily and held it firmly. “Get ahold of yourself, Sarah. Look at what you’ve become and tell me if you’re proud of that.”

I watched as Sarah turned around and got a really good look at herself in the mirror behind her. I saw her take in how wild her hair looked and how wide her eyes were. How red her face was and how she was posturing against me. I could see the tears welling in her eyes as she put her face in her hands, and I stood there as I waited for her to collect herself.

“Your daughter just saw that,” I said.

“I’m so sorry.”

“Your daughter. The one you claim to love, just saw you behave like a lunatic.”

“Kevin, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry isn’t good enough, not when it comes to my kids, Sarah. That’s why we can’t be together. That’s why you can’t be around these kids. Don’t you see that?” I asked.

“I just—when Sydney—”

Her body began to tremble, and I resisted the urge to comfort her. I didn’t want to open that door again. It was slammed shut and it would stay that way.

But my heart did ache for her, for the relationship my children could have had with her mother had she made better decisions.

“When I found out Sydney was gone, I freaked out, Kevin.”

“So did I,” I said.

“And I blamed you for it. I accused you of being an incompetent parent without taking into account the fact that I wasn’t even a part of their lives.”

“But acknowledging that now is a good first step,” I said.

“I do want to be in their lives, Kevin. I want to see them grow up.”

“Then we can sit down at a predetermined time and talk about it. But you can’t show up like this. Look at what you’ve done to my morning with the kids. They were shuffled upstairs so they didn’t have to bear witness to your tirade.”

“I know, I know.”

“Do you really?”

“I’m trying,” Sarah said.

“I’m not saying you can’t be involved in their lives, Sarah. What I am saying is that it’s going to take work. And that woman up there? I love her. She’s good with our children and she will be staying for as long as she’ll have me. Have us. And you’ll need to be okay with that, or this won’t work at all.”

I watched Sarah’s jaw clench as my words hung in the air.

“Call me when you’re calm and when you’ve had some time to think it over and we’ll talk about a plan that works for everyone involved,” I said.

She nodded her head sadly but seemed to understand what I was saying. I felt relief flood my body as I realized she wasn’t going to try and fight me. At least not right now. Whatever happened tomorrow, I would deal with tomorrow.

“I have to get the kids to school now,” I said.

She nodded and turned toward the door. Then I escorted Sarah out of the house and watched as she left.

Brooke offered to take the kids to school and I called into work. I would be working from home for the day. I was too tense and disoriented from the surprise visit to focus in my office, and I wasn’t ready to open that can of worms with Owen.

But I was shocked when Brooke came back after dropping off the kids.

“Hey there.”

“Hey,” she said.

“I didn’t think you were coming back.”

“I figured you could use some company after this morning,” she said.

“Thanks.”

I moved my laptop off my lap and stood to go see her. I wrapped her in my arms and allowed my forehead to fall against hers. The rhythmic pulsing of her breath was soothing to me, and my hands pressed her hips firmly into my body.

“I want you around,” I said.

“Well, I’m right here,” Brooke said.

“I mean, I want you around more often. For dinners and weekends. More breakfasts.”

“That would require me staying over,” she said with a grin.

“And?”

Her brow furrowed, and she pulled back, and, for a moment, I thought she was going to turn me down.

“You want me to stay over more often?” she asked.

“I want you to stay,” I said. “For as long as you’ll have us.”

I watched her mouth curl up into a grin as her hands tangled into the tendrils of my hair.

“I’d like that,” Brooke said.

“You would?” I asked.

She rose up and pressed her lips to mine, and I backed her into the wall as our tongues collided.

“Oh yes,” she whispered. “I would love it.”