“Last box done!” I flopped back onto my bed and smiled at the ceiling. “I live here.”
The feeling of being completely unpacked was like none other. I had been diligently unpacking every night this week and was now savoring my job well done. All I had left to do was to put out my framed pictures, but I wasn’t quite ready for those yet. First, I wanted to get some more recent photos of my family.
The house I’d rented was in a nice, established neighborhood about six blocks from Main Street. I’d chosen this house because it was within walking distance to the café and downtown. It was small but still twice the size my Seattle apartment had been.
The main floor had a square kitchen, small breakfast nook and living room. Upstairs was my master suite plus a guest bedroom and bathroom. The small alcove at the top of the stairs was now my office area.
The ringing doorbell had me pushing off my bed and scurrying downstairs.
“Hey,” I greeted Jess and Gigi. “What are you guys doing here?”
“Hi!” Gigi leaned in for a hug. “We came to see if you wanted to have drinks with us tonight.” She came in and started inspecting my house. Jess bent to kiss my cheek and followed his wife inside.
“Um, I’m not really dressed for drinks.” I was wearing a pair of ratty jeans and a plain black T-shirt. My hair was up in a ponytail because I hadn’t washed it today and my makeup had long ago been rubbed away.
“You look fine for the bars around here,” Jess said.
“Please come with us,” Gigi said. “We rarely get a sitter and it’ll be months before we can all hang out without the kids again.”
“How do you say no to that face?” I asked my brother. Gigi was giving me sad eyes and a small pout.
“It’s not easy.” He pulled her into his side for a steamy kiss.
“Fine. I’ll go.” It wasn’t like I couldn’t binge-watch Gossip Girl reruns tomorrow. “Give me five to freshen up. When you two get done kissing, feel free to take the self-guided tour.”
I rushed upstairs and swiped on some mascara, eye shadow and red lipstick. Then I cuffed my jeans and pulled on some six-inch heels and my black leather motorcycle jacket. It wasn’t my usual stylish “out for drinks” attire but it would do in a pinch.
“Ready!” I said as I rounded the corner of the stairs. The smile on Gigi’s face fell. “What?” I asked and looked down at myself. Had I ripped the crotch out of my jeans on accident?
“Give us commoners a chance, will you?”
“Ha! Like you’re one to talk.” Gigi made heads turn wherever she went.
“Jesus,” Jess muttered. “You’re both beautiful. Let’s get the fuck out of here.”
“Oh wait! I bought a bottle of champagne to celebrate when I unpacked everything. I just unloaded the last box before you got here. You can celebrate with me.” I hustled to the fridge and pulled out the bottle.
“Let’s just drink at the bar,” Jess said.
“This will take five whole minutes and I doubt the Prescott bars will have this type of champagne.” When it came to my bubbly, I always splurged.
“I better skip the glass,” Gigi said. “I’m the designated driver.”
I rolled my eyes. “A glass of champagne is not going to impair your driving abilities.”
“That’s okay,” she said. “I’m going to pass.”
“Seriously?”
Gigi didn’t answer but instead looked to Jess, who was intently studying my ceiling.
“Okay, what’s going on? You two are acting weird.”
“Nothing,” Gigi blurted. “I just don’t want any champagne.”
“Says the woman who is never without a glass of wine in her hand.”
Gigi’s eyes darted to the floor. I looked at Jess, who was now studying his boots, then back to Gigi. The two of them were definitely hiding something.
“You’re pregnant,” I guessed.
Gigi’s eyes shot to mine and Jess threw his hands in the air. “Told you we could have just told her.”
“Well, I didn’t know she was going to try and force-feed me champagne and that she had your super sleuthing abilities,” Gigi fired back.
Jess opened his mouth to retort but I interrupted. “Before you two get into one of your cute, albeit lengthy, debates, can we get back to the pregnancy news? You’re having another baby?”
Gigi nodded as a huge smile spread across her face.
“I’m so happy for you guys!” I rushed to give her a hug and then one for my brother.
“It’s early so we’re not telling people yet,” Gigi said.
“My lips are sealed. When are you due?”
“Mid-July. We’ll get a more specific date after my doctor’s appointment next month.”
“Awesome.” I never got to hold Ben when he was a newborn or see Rowen meet her little brother. Now that I was home, I would be fully participating in all other family milestones. I had missed too much already.
“Can we get going now?” Jess asked. “Or did you two want to stand out here and plan the baby shower while our sitter charges us twenty-five fucking dollars an hour?”
Gigi gave him an exaggerated scowl and I jabbed him in the ribs with my knuckle.
“Maybe you could help babysit the kids while we’re in the hospital?” Gigi asked as we walked outside. “Rowen would love that.”
Babysitting? “Uh, sure.” Rowen I could handle. Ben? Yikes. He still looked at me like I was a stranger, and any time I got close, he’d cry and run away. I had until the summer to get him to like me. Maybe I’d start bribing him with candy and toys.
I think that was how Mom got him to cuddle with her all the time. Her pockets were always full of chocolates.
“Can I run an idea by you guys?” I asked as Gigi drove us downtown. “I want to ask Mom to move in with me.”
“Good luck,” Jess mocked. “I asked her to move for years but finally gave up when she wouldn’t budge. I tried again last year. Offered to build her a cottage out by the farmhouse but she still said no.”
“What? Why?” The old trailer where we’d grown up was practically falling apart. Mom had neglected it for so long, some of the damage was irreparable. Jess had done his best to keep it up but there wasn’t much to be done when you had such a poor foundation to build upon.
“I think she feels like it would be a burden on us,” Gigi said. “She’s already so sensitive about her episodes and I think she likes living in town.”
“Well, my place is close to downtown and she could walk. Plus, I’d be there in case something happens to her. I’m going to ask her unless you think I shouldn’t.”
“Fine with me,” Jess said. “I’ll help do whatever to get her out of that shithole.”
Our conversation about Mom was cut short when we parked in front of the Claim Jumper bar. It was one of the few buildings in Prescott I hadn’t been inside before.
The room was long and narrow with dark wood paneling. The bar ran along one side of the room and a row of tall tables along its opposite. The mirrored shelves behind the bar were crowded with liquor bottles and old Montana license plates. Other Montana paraphernalia adorned the walls between multiple flat-screen TVs, including a framed state flag, a painted saw mill blade and a bison skull decorated with feathers and turquoise beads.
The place had character. I could see myself coming down to watch Seahawks games and drink a few beers. Make new memories in a place that wasn’t already heavy with history.
“There they are,” Gigi said, pointing toward the back of the room.
I followed her finger and my heart dropped. Silas and Maisy were sitting side by side at a table. Had I known he was going to be here, I would have at least worn nicer jeans.
Following Jess and Gigi through the room, I took a few deep breaths. Seeing Silas still made my belly flutter and adding Maisy into the mix wasn’t easing my nerves. I was glad that they weren’t a couple but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous of their close friendship.
“Hello.” I gave them a small wave and forced a smile.
Silas rumbled, “Hey,” but Maisy gave me a wary glance before focusing all her attention on Gigi and Jess. She must not have known that I was coming tonight either because she still wasn’t a fan. Glaring at her when she’d been talking to Silas in the motel lobby had done me no favors.
“Beer?” Jess asked and I nodded. After he came back from the bar with two beers and a vodka on the rocks—a.k.a. water—for Gigi, the group settled into conversation. Well . . . they talked. I listened.
“Did your new window shutters come in?” Gigi asked Maisy.
“No, they got delayed but Silas called them and talked them into doing rush shipping for free.”
“Bastards were going to charge her extra even though they dropped the ball.” He rested his arm across the back of her chair and I did my best to keep the smile on my face. I hated how affectionate he was with her and not me.
“Silas to the rescue,” Maisy teased, nudging him in the side with her shoulder. “Between him and Beau, I never have to make uncomfortable calls. If they think I’m even remotely being taken for a ride, they get all worked up and jump on the phone.”
“Hey, I’m just trying to make sure you have enough money to make me your—”
“—buttermilk biscuits,” Maisy finished.
Silas patted his stomach and everyone laughed. I took a huge gulp of my beer instead.
Damn, this was uncomfortable. As far as I knew, no one knew about me and Silas. They were oblivious to how much his behavior with Maisy was shredding me. I’m sure they all thought I was being a stuck-up bitch, just sitting here and not participating in the conversation. The reality was I couldn’t speak, not with jealously and emotion clogging my throat.
I wanted his arm around my chair. I wanted to be the one cooking his favorites. I wanted to be the one finishing his sentences.
Silas had said that he and Maisy had dated briefly last summer, but had they been more serious than he’d let on? They acted like a long-standing couple, not casual friends. Any outsider would take one look at our table and identify me as the fifth wheel.
Two beers later, I couldn’t take it anymore. “I think I’m going to head home. I’ve got to catch up on some work tomorrow and the last thing I need is a hangover.”
“What? No!” Gigi protested.
“You guys stay and have fun. I’m just going to walk home and enjoy the quiet night.”
I stood from my seat at the same time someone screeched “Felicity!” behind me.
My old friend Andrea Merkuso rushed my way and came right into my space for an exuberant hug. “I’m so excited to see you! It’s been ages.”
Her reaction was unexpected and it took me a moment to hug her back. Andrea and I had been close in high school but I hadn’t talked to her since graduation. She had a catty side, and right before I’d left for Seattle, we’d gotten into a spat. I was glad to see that she wasn’t still holding a grudge.
“It’s good to see you too.” Surprisingly good. Refreshing, actually. It was rare for me to see a familiar face and not feel the need to apologize for something.
“You look hot!” She stepped back and surveyed my outfit. “Like a sexy motorcycle chick.”
I laughed. “You look good too.”
Andrea was as beautiful as she’d been in our youth. She had the same long blond hair and trim figure, though her boobs had definitely been enhanced. “So, you’re back. How great! It will be just like old times.”
I smiled but didn’t comment. The last thing I wanted was for my adult life to resemble that of my adolescence.
“I’ve been meaning to track you down but wanted to wait until you moved out of our rather unfortunate motel.”
I didn’t miss her dig toward Maisy and glanced back to the table.
Maisy had shrunk into her chair and Silas’s arm was around her shoulders again. His jaw was locked tight. Gigi was glaring daggers at Andrea while Jess was staring at his beer bottle with extreme concentration.
Okay, weird.
“So are you working?” Andrea asked, stealing my attention away from the table.
I nodded. “Yes. I work as a consultant for a tech company back in Seattle.” Her eyebrows came together, so I explained, “I dig into a company’s processes and recommend where they can automate manual steps with software.”
“Sounds fancy.”
“It’s not fancy at all. Boring, actually. What about you?”
“I’m a dental hygienist for Dr. Lester.”
“Just like you always wanted to do. Good for you.”
“Thanks! I’m here with some people. Let me go get a drink and tell them where I’m at. Then I’ll come back and we can catch up. Okay?”
“Oh, I was just leaving.”
“No! Please. One more beer. Pleeeease.”
“Um . . . okay. I guess I could stay for one more beer.” I really didn’t want to stay, but if Andrea joined our table, at least I wouldn’t feel like a tagalong anymore.
She walked away and I slid back into my seat, looking up to four pairs of eyes glaring at me. My spine straightened as the tense, angry mood hit me in the face.
“What?”
“Inviting Andrea to sit with us is not okay, Lissy,” Jess said.
“Why? I haven’t seen her since high school. I’m just trying to be nice and say hello.”
“Don’t.”
My defenses snapped into place. “Seriously? Don’t be nice? Don’t talk to an old friend?”
“No, don’t talk to that one.”
“Why?” I said through gritted teeth.
“She’s a bitch to Georgia and Maisy and not welcome here. Whip out that famous lashing tongue of yours and get her the fuck out of here.”
“Jess—” Gigi said but I interrupted her.
“I’m not going to be rude just because you don’t like her. She was my friend.”
“Do yourself a favor and cut her out of your life. The sooner the better. And she’s not sitting here.”
“Look,” I said, “I don’t want Gigi and Maisy to be uncomfortable but I’m also not going to blow off Andrea when I just told her I’d stay. I’ll just move to a different table.”
“You’re sitting with us,” he insisted.
“Not anymore.”
Jess was dreaming if he thought he could dictate my actions. I stood from my chair, but before I could leave, Andrea appeared at my side.
Oh, hell.
She smiled at me and then turned to the table. “Hi, Silas,” she purred before narrowing her eyes at Maisy. When her gaze wandered over Jess and Gigi, her entire face twisted in disgust. “I can’t imagine how horrible it must be for you to have to hang out with them just because you’re related. Thank god I came here tonight so I could rescue you.”
“Watch yourself, Andrea,” I snapped. “That’s my family you’re insulting.”
My attitude locked into place. She had just proved Jess right and made me look like a dope for arguing with him. There wasn’t anything I could do to save face now, but I wouldn’t let her make it worse. Jess would get to see my lashing tongue after all.
“What?” Andrea asked, playing innocent.
“You know what. Don’t forget who you’re talking to.” I hardened my glare, daring her to keep pushing me.
“You’d actually pick them over me?”
“How is that shocking? Don’t be stupid. Think that through for one second and answer your own question.”
“I guess the rumors are true,” she sneered. “You are just as big of a bitch as you were in high school.”
That hurt but I didn’t let my expression falter. I’d expected the rumors but had foolishly hoped I could prove them wrong. Too late for that. Andrea would twist my words into something malicious, and tomorrow, the whole town would think that I had viciously attacked her.
I should walk away and let it go, I didn’t need to give her any more fuel for the fire, but I wasn’t going to.
I looked down my nose, using the three inches I had on her as intimidation. “I’ve spent years sharpening my claws. The woman I am now would rip the old me to shreds. Care to keep going and see how you stand up?”
She held my stare for a moment before crumbling under its pressure. “My friends are probably waiting for me.”
“Bye.” I dismissed her and, as her heels clicked away, spun around to grab my purse. “Happy, Brother?”
“Lissy—”
“Good night.” I walked out the door, ignoring Gigi’s call and Andrea’s glare.
I hadn’t succeeded in making any friends tonight and had shoved Andrea firmly into the enemy category. On top of it all, Silas had been front and center to witness my complete lack of self-control.
Way to go, Felicity.
One step forward, two steps back.
Silas
“Why did you do that?” Gigi scolded Jess.
“Do what?” he asked.
“Push her like that. The minute you got after her about Andrea, it was like a wall snapped up in front of her face. Can’t you see that she’s trying to let people in? Now she’s fully retreated back into her head.”
Felicity had been trying and I was glad that someone other than myself had noticed.
“Fuck,” Jess muttered and hung his head. “I’ll go talk to her.”
I jumped up from my chair. “No. Let me.”
Gigi and Maisy shared a knowing look but I ignored it along with Jess’s scowl and hustled outside.
“Felicity,” I called after her. She was walking fast but I caught up to her with a few quick strides. “Hold up.”
“I just want to go home, Silas.”
“Talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” she said over her shoulder as she kept marching.
“Felicity, stop.” I grabbed her elbow. She yanked it free and picked up her pace.
Not this time, babe.
She wasn’t running from me anymore. I took two long steps and wrapped my arms around her. The smell of her flowery hair surrounded me as she struggled to get free. The more she fought, the tighter my hold became. “Lis,” I whispered into her ear, “stop.”
Her body immediately relaxed and her head fell forward.
“Talk to me. What’s wrong?”
“It’s so disappointing,” she whispered.
“What is? Andrea? Who cares about her? She hasn’t changed since high school. Did you really want her as a friend?”
“No. I don’t need people like her in my life. It’s not that.”
I let her go so she could turn and face me. “Then what is it?”
“It’s me. I’m trying to fit in here and make new friends, but instead, I’m just driving that wedge deeper. I shouldn’t have gotten so mad at Jess. Maisy thinks I’m a bitch. And you . . .”
“Me what?” I stepped closer into her space.
Her hitched breath had my cock twitching. When my eyes locked with hers, I almost forgot what we were talking about. Those eyes would be my undoing. Even in the darkness I could make out their bright blue. I could go blind and still see them clear as day.
Staring into their brilliance, I willed her to open up. To be honest with me about her feelings. To give me the chance to prove to her that I was her safe place.
My frame deflated when her shield went right back up. Those eyes closed me out and she took a step back.
“Forget it,” she said. “I’m just tired. It’s been a long week and Andrea made me mad.”
I shook my head. “Uh-huh.”
“I think you and Maisy should give a relationship another shot. It seems like you’ve got something there.”
What. The. Fuck. Where had that come from?
“I told you. We’re just friends.” The only person that I didn’t want to be friends with was the infuriating, beautiful, stubborn woman in front of me.
“Maybe you just don’t want to admit your feelings for her but they’re there. It’s hard not to miss.”
I closed my eyes and clamped my teeth shut to keep from speaking. If I told her she was being a blind fool, she’d snap at me. If she snapped at me, she’d get mad at herself because sometime in the last sixteen years she’d gotten her head twisted right the fuck up.
She was trying to smother that spirit I adored. Did she think that her fiery personality was keeping people at arm’s length? I opened my eyes and my mouth to start the untwisting process but she was already backing away.
“I’ll see you, okay? Just think about what I said. Maisy seems like a nice girl.” She spun around and let those long legs and high heels carry her quickly down the sidewalk.
Should I catch her? Try and talk some sense into her?
No. It was pointless tonight. Felicity wouldn’t hear anything I had to say right now so I went back inside the bar.
“Is she okay?” Gigi asked.
“Yeah,” I lied. “She’s just pissed about Andrea.”
“Well, that put a damper on the evening,” Maisy said. “I’d probably better get going anyway. If I hurry home, I can say good night to Coby before he falls asleep.”
“We’re going to head home too,” Gigi said.
Maisy and I said our good-byes to the Clearys and walked to my truck. As she climbed into the passenger seat, I realized that she had spent more time in that spot than anyone else.
Almost two years ago, Maisy and Gigi had been kidnapped and nearly killed. In order for the women to escape, Maisy had been forced to kill the man that had taken her. But he hadn’t been just a random attacker. The man had been a doctor at the hospital, her ex-boyfriend and Coby’s father.
Ever since that night, Maisy had leaned on me. She’d told me once that I made her feel comfortable. We’d become good friends and I liked spending time with her. She was sweet and easygoing, but had Felicity been right? Was there more?
I turned and looked at Maisy, then dismissed the thought. She was great but she wasn’t right. The truck may have changed, but there was only one woman who had ever looked like she belonged in that seat.
“When Felicity came back for Wes’s funeral and was a bitch to Gigi, it didn’t make me like her much. Now that she’s back, I’ve been apprehensive, but Gigi’s right, she’s different. And the fact that she put Andrea in her place was, like, amazing.”
I nodded but didn’t agree. Felicity wasn’t all that different now than she was before. I had just known her better back then than she’d let anyone else know her.
“Are you ever going to tell me what’s going on between you two?” Maisy asked.
I chuckled. “Is it that obvious?”
“Probably just to me because I’m so brilliant. And I may have seen you sneak out of her motel room before Halloween. So spill. What’s going on?”
I sighed. “There’s a lot of history there. Good and bad. Lots of gaps in between. She hurt me once, but even after that, she’s always been with me. Ever since we were kids.”
“You love her.”
There was no use denying it. Maisy would see right through a lie. “Yeah.”
“Does she know?”
I scoffed. “No, she wants to be friends.”
“Then be her friend.”
“Easy as that?”
“Yep. Easy as that. Treat her like you treat me and she’ll have no choice but to love you.”
Her words sent my heart to my stomach. Fuck. I didn’t have feelings for Maisy but did she have them for me? Had I been leading her on all this time? It had been my idea for us to try dating but I’d also been the one to break it off. Christ, I’d only kissed her twice and both times it had felt like kissing a little sister. I’d known after two weeks that we’d never work.
“Maisy, I—”
“Don’t, Silas,” she interrupted before I could apologize. “I’m not in love with you. I just love you. I’m happy for you and sad at the same time. You’ll set off to win Felicity’s heart and that will leave me without you.”
“You won’t lose me.”
She smiled. “I will, but that’s how it’s supposed to be.”
I couldn’t argue. With Felicity in my life, things would certainly change, including my friendship with Maisy.
“I’m sorry.” I pulled into the motel’s parking lot and parked by the stairs that led to her small loft above the office.
“No apologies. Go win your girl, then name your first-born daughter after me as payment for my unbelievably sage advice.”
I laughed as she hopped out of the truck. Maisy had a gift for lightening the mood.
“Bye.” She waved and walked upstairs. I waited until she was safely inside before heading home to the ranch. Halfway home, my phone rang.
Jess.
It was no surprise that he was calling. If Maisy had noticed something between me and Felicity, Jess would have too. In thirty-some years of friendship, I never could get much past him. The fact that I’d managed to hide my feelings for his sister for this long was nothing short of a miracle.
“Hello,” I answered.
“What’s going on with my sister?”
“She’s got it in her head that we’re all mad at her. She’s on some quest to reinvent herself.”
“That’s not what I meant. What’s going on with you and my sister?”
How did I answer that? I’m in love with her. She’s in love with Wes, even now that he’s gone. I’m so desperate for her I don’t even care that he’ll always have her heart. Yeah, he wasn’t getting that answer.
I blew out a deep breath. “It’s complicated, man. And I’m not going to tell you until I can work out some of that shit with her.”
“How long?” His teeth were grinding together.
I thought about it for a moment before answering. “Since the beginning.”
“And Wes?”
“He was never the right one. He just asked her first.”
“She’s finally back,” Jess said. “I don’t want something to chase her off again. I want to see her happy.”
“You and me both.”
“Fine,” he grumbled. “I’ll back off. Tell me this, though. Am I ever going to learn what happened when I was at the academy? Why my sister split the second the ink dried on her diploma, you joined the army on a whim and my other best friend became a fucking junkie drug dealer?”
Jess had asked me those questions more times than I could count. I had finally gotten so sick of his persistence that I’d broken his nose. But his answers could only come from one person: Felicity.
“I made her a promise. It’s her story to share.”