Beau
In the month that had passed since Sabrina and I had started having sex, I’d learned one thing for certain.
I was fucked.
For every minute we spent together, I wanted ten more. And the sex? Fuck me. We connected on every level that existed.
So, yeah. I. Was. Fucked.
I didn’t want her for right now. I wanted her for always.
I wanted what I’d never have.
“She’s leaving,” I reminded myself, something I did about a hundred times a day.
“Who? Sabrina?” Michael said, sliding into my booth at the café.
Shit. “Uh, yeah.” He had left for the bathroom but there must have been a line. Now that he’d overheard a comment intended for my ears only, there would be no avoiding the Sabrina subject.
“You should get her a job here,” Michael said. “She’s awesome and then you two can keep dating.”
Dating. Did walks in the meadow and dinners on the outpost floor count as dates? I’d never taken her to a nice dinner or a movie. Hell, I’d never taken her out in public. Were we dating? Regardless of the label, it was the best time I’d ever had with a woman, which made the fact that we had an expiration date really fucking depressing.
“I don’t think that’s going to happen,” I told Michael. “She’s from the city and I don’t think Montana is where she wants to live.”
“Have you asked her?”
“No.” Why would I ask a question when I already knew the answer?
“You should.” He unrolled his silverware from the white napkin, oblivious to the pain in my chest. Michael had completely taken to Sabrina after his visit to the outpost during the forest fire and I wasn’t surprised he was pushing for her to stay. He had this look in his eyes every time he talked about her that said please make her my sister-in-law.
We needed to be done talking about Sabrina. Things were better at the outpost when I was with her. Back in Prescott, that’s when the reality of our situation really sank in and left me feeling miserable.
Talking about it wasn’t therapeutic. It just made things worse.
“So how’s everything at the station going?” I asked, changing the subject.
“Good. Busy.” Michael spent the next thirty minutes giving me an update on his job. When our lunches arrived, we ate quietly and I let my thoughts wander back to Sabrina.
She’s leaving.
She’s made for bigger and better things than a simple life with me.
She doesn’t belong in Montana.
Now there was a total lie. Sabrina had professed her hatred of nature and all things outdoors, but she’d taken to it better than most women who had grown up in this area. She couldn’t hide her love for the outpost. She was the happiest when we were strolling through her grassy meadow. And she’d looked like she was made to sit on the rocks when we’d hiked up to the waterfall.
She belonged.
Maybe if I could keep her in Montana long enough, she’d see that for herself.
Sabrina
The days were flying by.
It was the middle of August and summer was nearly over. I had been at the outpost for over four months and was as happy and relaxed as I had been in my entire adult life.
My enjoyment from writing, the peaceful environment and my budding relationship with Beau had created the perfect balance of contentment and excitement.
Beau and I had fallen into our best routine yet. He worked in Prescott during the week while I was writing, then he’d spend the weekends with me at the outpost, where we were basically having sex like rock stars. The few times we’d forced ourselves apart, Beau had guided me on short hikes or made me practice my self-defense.
The only thing I needed to be happier was an air conditioner to battle the late-afternoon heat in the outpost.
It was a good thing that neither Beau nor Boone minded if I was dressed in as little as possible. My wardrobe these days consisted of thin tank tops, cutoff denim shorts and black rubber flip-flops.
Even though I would have preferred a Sunday afternoon spent naked with Beau, the outpost was so stuffy this afternoon that we’d forced ourselves outside for a walk in the meadow before he had to leave for the week.
“The weekends go too fast,” I said. “It feels like you just got here.”
He reached out to grab my hand, threading his fingers with mine. “Yeah. And next weekend I’m not going to get here until Saturday morning.”
“Oh.” My shoulders slumped. “Okay.”
After spending an entire week apart and without any contact, I lived for Friday nights when Beau would arrive. I never even attempted writing on Fridays because I couldn’t sit still. Instead, I cleaned and listened for the sound of his approaching truck, running to the door at the slightest noise.
When he did show up, I usually attacked him the second his foot stepped out of his truck. This last Friday, we hadn’t even bothered going inside before ripping each other’s clothes off. Instead, he’d fucked me right up against the side of his truck.
Delaying my Beau time was not a welcome surprise. Who knew how many nights together we had left? Yesterday, he had driven me up on the ridge to check the news. The case against the Federovs was progressing more quickly than I had imagined and the papers had speculated they’d be sentenced before winter.
If we only had a couple months left, selfishly, I wanted all of his Friday nights.
“What’s happening Friday?” I asked.
“I got a call from a friend from college. She’s coming through town and wanted to have dinner to catch up.”
“She?” I was completely jealous and didn’t even try and sound cool. Beau and I hadn’t really discussed exclusivity, and until now, I didn’t think we needed to. Who was I going to meet in hiding? But it hadn’t occurred to me that he might be dating other women because he just didn’t seem the type to play the field.
He squeezed my hand and grinned. “Relax. She’s just an old friend. Her best friend was my girlfriend so we spent a lot of time together in college.”
I pouted. “Okay.”
“Call me a barbarian but I like you looking all jealous.”
“There’s no use lying or pretending that I’m not. I hate that this woman gets one of my nights.”
“Imagine how I feel. I’m jealous of my own damn dog because he gets to see you every day.”
I smiled. “Does that mean you’re smitten with me, Goliath?”
He shrugged. “You’re just okay.”
“Yeah. You’re just okay too.”
He looked down at me with a wide, white smile that made my heart jump. Smitten wasn’t the right word to describe how I felt about Beau but the real word terrified me too much to even consider.
Beau’s smile vanished and his head whipped back to the trees.
“What?” I followed his eyes but didn’t see anything.
He held a finger up to his lips. He listened again, then turned, tugging me along at his side. “Come on.” He kept his strides short so I didn’t have to jog but I hustled anyway. The clench of his jaw and tight shoulders couldn’t mean good things.
The sound of an approaching vehicle filled the air as we got close to the tree line. That Beau had heard it earlier was remarkable.
Standing in front of me, Beau was my shield as we waited for the vehicle to arrive. My hands rested on his lower back, clinging to his T-shirt, and though I was scared, I reminded myself that Beau was here and the only visitors that had ever come to the outpost had nothing to do with my situation. This could easily be Michael coming to tell Beau about another forest fire.
When a black truck emerged from the trees and pulled into the clearing, Beau’s entire frame relaxed. I peeked around him and saw Silas. My eyes darted to the passenger seat, hoping to see Felicity too but Silas was alone.
Silas parked and got out, then came right to us, shaking Beau’s hand. “Hey, man. Hi, Sabrina.”
“Hi. Is everything okay with Felicity?” I didn’t care how many mafia goons were after me, if my friend was in trouble, I was going back to Prescott.
“She’s fine. Well, she’s not fine. She’s stressed about the wedding, but other than that, she’s all good.” His face softened as he talked about his fiancée.
“Then what’s going on?” Beau asked.
Silas shook his head and frowned. “We had a visitor in town today.”
“Oh, no,” I said at the same time Beau cursed. “Was it Ivan?”
“No. It was a guy from the FBI. He showed at the sheriff’s station and spent the better part of the morning talking to Jess. He suspects you’re either in Montana, or were. He said he got a letter from you a while back postmarked from Wyoming. Sounds like he’s trying to trace your footsteps and guessed you’d come here.”
I nodded. “It must be Henry Dalton. We got word to him months ago that I was alive. He’s the FBI agent I sent all of my evidence against the Federovs to before my flight from Seattle.”
“Well, he’s been fairly insistent he talk to Felicity but Jess is stalling him. We could all lie, play it off and tell him you were here but left. Or we could arrange for you to meet him in a safe spot. It’s your call.”
It wasn’t all that surprising that Henry had tracked me down. We’d been friends in Seattle and he knew how close I was to Felicity. It made sense he’d come looking in her hometown. What concerned me most was why he’d come calling now. I’d disappeared months ago.
“Why is he here now? Do you think something happened with the case?” I looked between Silas and Beau for an answer.
“I didn’t talk to him,” Silas said. “All I know is that Jess spent the better part of his day checking this guy out and then keeping him occupied at the station so I could come up here and talk to you.”
Without any information as to why Henry was here, I didn’t have much of a choice. Something had to be wrong if Henry had come looking for me now and I had to know why he was in Montana.
“How would this meeting work?” I asked.
“We’ll pick a spot in the country,” Silas said. “Jess will bring Henry and I’ll bring you.”
“Okay.” My fingers found a lock of my hair. “Let’s arrange the meeting.”
“I’m coming.” Beau’s tone was final.
Silas nodded. “I didn’t expect you’d sit this one out.”
A nervous knot settled in my stomach, making it hard for me to take a full breath.
“All right,” Silas said. “Let’s go. Once we hit cell service, I’ll call Jess and tell him where to meet us.”
We wasted no time getting in Silas’s truck and driving down the road. I was grateful for Boone being in the back seat with me so I could keep my hands busy by petting his head.
Beau turned around from the front, reaching over the console to set his hand on my knee. “It’s going to be fine.”
I nodded. “I just want to find out why he’s here. Do you think he’s here to tell me I can come home?”
“I don’t know, Shortcake.” His thumb drew gentle circles on my skin even as he turned back to the front.
We rode in silence for most of the trip, bumping along the slow track. My mind was spinning, and no matter how many deep, calming breaths I inhaled, nothing was easing the nervous sickness in my stomach. Finally, I’d had enough of the quiet and started peppering Silas with questions about the wedding.
“Did the seamstress finish Felicity’s dress?” I asked. “Her last letter said she was worried it might not be ready in time.”
Silas nodded. “Yeah. She got it yesterday.”
Silas and Felicity were getting married in less than two weeks. Felicity had been keeping me apprised of the wedding details with letters she sent with Beau each week, so even though I couldn’t be there in person, I was still a part of planning her special day.
“Good. And Rowen is all set to be the flower girl?”
He chuckled. “She’s ready. Gigi’s brought her over twice now because Roe insisted on practicing with Felicity. I guess having Jess pretend to be the bride and practicing at the farmhouse wasn’t good enough.”
I smiled, wishing I could have seen that. I’d never met Jess’s wife, Gigi, or their daughter, Rowen, but from everything Felicity had told me about her niece, nothing about Silas’s story surprised me.
Silas looked back at me through the rearview mirror. “She misses you like crazy, Sabrina. If you said the word, she’d postpone the wedding in a heartbeat so you could be there. I’d be fine with it too.”
I gave him a sad smile. “There will be no postponing. You two have waited long enough.”
For months, Felicity’s letters had offered to postpone but my replies had always been final. My drama was not going to get in the way of their wedding.
“Take lots of pictures, make sure someone videos the ceremony, and freeze me a slice of wedding cake. That’s all I want. I refuse to have anything this happy be delayed on my account. Refuse.”
Silas chuckled. “Lis has one hell of a stubborn streak, but damn, Sabrina, I think you might have her beat. I’d pay good money to watch you two go head-to-head and see who comes out on top.”
“My money is on Sabrina,” Beau said.
I smiled, grateful for the easy banter.
We chatted more about the wedding, then Silas and Beau visited about things in Prescott while I sat quietly in the back. When we emerged from the forest and into the prairie, Silas called Jess and arranged for a meeting place outside of town while I swiped Beau’s phone to quickly check on my family’s social-media posts.
“Thirty minutes,” Silas said after he hung up with Jess.
Too anxious to speak, I just nodded and turned to my window. The late afternoon sun was bright on the tall grasses swaying in the breeze. I had been so confined to my forest and meadow, being in the open was unsettling. Out here, I was an easy target, not protected by the mountain walls of my valley.
I had only been gone three hours but I already missed the outpost.
It was hard to believe four months had passed since I’d made this trip. In a lot of ways, it felt as if I were stepping back in time. I was climbing out of the wardrobe from Narnia, rejoining the real world as if no time at all had passed since I’d entered a different realm.
Taking a deep breath, I willed my knees to stop shaking. I hoped that whatever Henry had to say wouldn’t take too long so the drive back wouldn’t be in the dark. Silas and Beau still had to get back to Prescott tonight.
I hadn’t appreciated just how much driving Beau had been doing to visit me. The thought of him coming back and forth was nearly as endearing as all the wonderful things he’d told me these last four months.
“There’s Jess,” Silas said exactly thirty minutes later, pulling off the side of a gravel road behind the sheriff’s huge, bronze truck.
I swallowed the lump in my throat, took a deep breath and pushed my door open with shaking hands. Beau led the way to Jess’s truck, and I followed on his heels, not wanting him out of my reach.
“Jess,” Beau said, planting his hands on his hips, effectively hiding me behind his massive frame.
Jess jerked his head to Henry. “This is Henry Dalton with the FBI. He’s here to talk with Sabrina.”
Beau stood taller, not letting me sidestep him. I was sure that behind his mirrored sunglasses, he was glaring at Henry, but because he kept leaning to block my side steps, I couldn’t get around him to see his face. His uber-protectiveness would have been funny if not for my jumping nerves. Finally, Beau dropped his arms and reached back to pull me right into the middle of the men’s circle.
I gave Henry an awkward wave and a small smile. “Hi, Henry.”
He frowned. “Sabrina.”
I’d always thought Henry was tall, standing an inch or two over six feet, but in this group, he was the shortest other than me. His wavy brown hair was perfectly styled, per usual, but his normal boyish grin was gone. Agent Dalton was not happy with me in the slightest.
“Well, thank god you’re not dead,” he said. “You know, you could have just told me where you were. It would have saved me from having to track you down.”
“Sorry,” I muttered. “Secrecy has kind of been my thing lately.”
“No shit?” he deadpanned.
“How about instead of giving her a hard time, you tell us what you’re doing here?” Beau asked.
Henry glared over my head at Beau, then tipped his brown eyes back to me. “I’m here to take you into witness protection.”
“What?” My mouth fell open. “Why?”
“Probably because you decided to investigate a family with known Russian mafia ties without so much as a phone call to let me know about your ridiculous plan. Fuck, Sabrina. They could have killed you!”
At Henry’s outburst, Beau’s heat hit my back and Jess and Silas both stepped closer to my side.
“It’s okay,” I said, holding up my hands to try and calm everyone down. “He deserves the chance to yell. We’ve known each other for a long time, and he’s right, I should have called him.”
“Yeah,” Henry muttered. “You should have.”
“Back to the point. Why do I need to go into witness protection?”
“The rumor is that Russians from the mother country are getting involved in the Federov case. I’ve got a CIA contact on the inside who sent word that some of the higher-ups are taking a personal interest in this one.”
My heart dropped into my stomach as Silas and Jess both muttered, “Fuck.” Beau wrapped an arm around my chest, holding me tight.
How could I have been so stupid? My happy life at the outpost had been a dream. A delay in the inevitable. I didn’t stand a chance against the Russian mafia.
“What did your guy on the inside say exactly? Is there a hit out for her?” Jess asked.
“No, not yet. It’s strange, but right now, they’re just looking at the evidence in the case. Doesn’t matter. With them in the mix, I don’t want to risk it. She has to come in.”
“Why?” Beau asked. “Just because the case is getting more attention, that doesn’t mean they’re necessarily looking for her. She doesn’t need to come in and risk a fuck-up on your part. You could have come here months ago when she sent you that letter but you didn’t and she’s been perfectly safe.”
Henry snarled. “We don’t fuck up WITSEC. And I didn’t come here, because I’ve got eyes on the Federovs and every one of their known associates. If you add the Russians into the mix, I don’t have enough manpower to make sure the focus stays in Seattle. You haven’t had any visitors here yet, but trust me, you won’t like it if they come.”
“Trust me when I say you don’t have as much control over Seattle as you’d like to think,” Beau shot back. “Unless you’d like to tell me that you knew Ivan Federov came to Prescott in June.”
None of us missed the flash of surprise on Henry’s face. My confidence in witness protection was falling by the second because either Henry had an agent falling asleep on the job or someone on his team was playing both sides.
“She stays here,” Beau declared.
“I agree,” Silas added.
Jess nodded. “Me too.”
“I found her, eventually someone else will too,” Henry said. “Is that what you really want, Sabrina? Just waiting for someone to hunt you down?”
I shook my head. Henry was right. I wasn’t safe. I had been able to ignore that reality at the outpost. Hidden away in the mountains, I had lost touch with how much my life was at risk. But now, here in the open, the fears I’d had in April came back in full force.
I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to be in witness protection, but what other choice did I have?
“Okay, Henry,” I sighed. “I’ll go.”
Beau’s arm clenched tight. “No.”
I twisted my neck to look up to his face. “No?”
“It’s too soon, Shortcake. Don’t leave yet. Give it a couple more months at least.” His soft plea melted my heart.
I turned back to Henry. “Do I have to decide today? What’s the harm in me staying hidden here for a little while longer? We could wait and see how the trial shakes out. Maybe your source with the Russians can give you a better idea of what they want and if they’re even interested in me at all.”
“Sabrina, this is stupid.” Henry’s jaw clenched tight and he threw an arm out to the open prairie. “I can’t protect you out here.”
“You don’t need to,” Beau said. “We’ve got her.”
Henry and Beau went into another stare down but I didn’t let it go on long.
“Henry, please?” I begged, drawing his focus. “I’m not ready to say good-bye to Sabrina MacKenzie yet. If that’s what needs to happen, fine. But let’s just make absolutely sure first. Please?”
“We’ve known each other for years,” he said. “I don’t want to say good-bye to Sabrina MacKenzie either, but I’d much rather know you were alive living as someone new rather than a murder waiting to be investigated. Witness protection is the answer.”
“I promise I’ll go willingly if that is what needs to happen. But not yet.”
“I can’t agree to this,” he clipped.
“Please?” I whispered.
His suit-clad chest expanded before he blew out a loud huff. “Fine. It’s your choice.”
“Thank you.” I rushed out of Beau’s embrace and gave Henry a hug. “Thank you.”
He hugged me back, his designer cologne filling my nose. “You know, I was the one who came to your apartment the morning after you disappeared. I got that file you sent and then the call that there had been a disturbance at your house. I swear, Sabrina, I thought I’d find you dead.”
“I’m glad you didn’t.”
He sighed. “Me too.”
I squeezed him tighter before stepping away. Once upon a time, I’d had a crush on Henry Dalton. He was handsome and smart, and when he smiled, he had an adorable dimple in one cheek. But even his pretty brown eyes couldn’t conjure the butterflies I used to feel for him.
Those little flutters all belonged to Beau now.
“Would you do me a favor when you get back to Seattle?”
He nodded. “Name it.”
“Will you check in on my family? I’d like to make sure they’re all okay.”
“They are,” he said. “We’ve had an agent watching them since you went missing. Everyone’s fine.”
Checking social media was one thing but hearing from someone I trusted that my parents and brothers were fine was an immense relief. “Thank you.”
“I need to be able to call you.”
“Okay,” I said at the same time Beau declared, “No.”
“Why not?” I asked, turning around. “Don’t you think it would be good to know what’s happening?”
“Any message he needs to send can go through Jess. You’re going to disappear again.”
Henry let out a dry laugh. “You know I could find her. Obviously, she’s been with you. How long do you think it will take me to figure out who the fuck you are and where she could be staying?”
Beau’s hands fisted and a couple of knuckles cracked. “I’m thinking you’re going to leave here and not draw any unnecessary attention to why you’ve been on vacation in Montana. That would include asking a bunch of questions about me and my relationship with Sabrina. You wouldn’t want anyone to follow your tracks, now would you?”
Henry’s jaw ticked as he gave Beau a short nod before looking to me. “I hope you know what you’re doing with this guy.”
I wasn’t sure if he meant my relationship with Beau or that I was trusting Beau with my safety. Regardless, my response was the same. “Yes, we know what we’re doing.”
Henry turned to Jess. “You can get word to Sabrina if we need to in a hurry?”
“Yeah.” Jess nodded.
“Okay. Take care of yourself,” Henry told me.
“I will. You too.”
He pulled a pair of Ray-Bans from his suit pocket and slid them over his eyes. Then without another word, he walked back to Jess’s truck.
“Let’s go,” Silas said.
Without delay, I got back in Silas’s truck, leaning down to give Boone a short hug. Silas and Beau loaded up and we roared away, Jess’s truck leaving a dust stream in its wake as it went the opposite direction.
“I don’t trust that guy,” Beau said.
Silas chuckled. “That’s just because he wants what you have.”
Beau mumbled something under his breath but I couldn’t hear him. I was too busy replaying Silas’s jest.
Did Henry have feelings for me? I’d always thought my crush on him was one-sided. No wonder Beau and Henry had both been puffing up their chests.
Men.
They might have an issue with one another but I was content to let a group of large, strapping men act as my protectors.
Because if the Russian mafia was after me too, I would need all of the protection I could get.