Prologue
I intently watch through the wires of the cage, my arms crossed firmly against my chest. Fights like this happen daily at the Cage. It’s a part of our training regime, but as these two skilled fighters spar one another on the mat, I can’t take my eyes off the action. My gaze moves quickly between the two of them as Hank slides one leg under Mike’s armpit. Turning his body, he catches Mike’s arm in a locked position. He continues to wrestle with him until he catches the exact moment he needs to make his next move. Grunts and sweat pour from each of the men as adrenaline fills the space. It’s like I’m watching a train wreck about to happen, I know what’s coming but I can’t look away. I have to keep my eyes glued on the fight. Hank continues to take the lead, pushing his arm away from his back, creating pressure on Mike’s elbow and shoulder. A loud scream echoes throughout the walls as Mike yells out in agony. The piercing noise blasts throughout the large space, causing Hank to still as he sees the pain he’s inflicting on his opponent, his best friend. The sound of Dan’s powerful voice shouts out bringing me out of the trance and back to the reality . . . Mike is indeed hurt. Calling the fight to stop, Dan runs into the cage with Birch and our coach, Gus, following close behind.
What the hell just happened?
As I turn to face the front entrance of the warehouse, my eyes are focused on Taryn’s reaction. White as a ghost, she looks as if all the blood has drained from her beautiful face and she’s about ready to lose her shit. Glancing back over to the cage, everyone is pushing their way inside to check on Mike. I could rush in and follow suit, but really what’s the point? The care he needs is already kneeling down surrounding his defeated body. I know what just happened. I was right here and saw every second of it. This wasn’t just a training fight. It was a battle for the girl. Two best friends wanting something that neither will ever have, that is if I have anything to say about it.
Fuck, who the hell am I kidding? It isn’t my choice to make, she’s not mine to win . . . this isn’t my fight.
Today’s battle was between my twin brother, Hank, and our best friend, Mike, both strong competitors within the metal cage. In fact, Mike is one of the best fighters who has ever stepped foot into the Cage, there’s no reason he should have let Hank take him down like that. He was sidetracked, his attention pulled elsewhere for a split second and no matter what or who says different, Mike could have won that fight.
For as long as I can remember Taryn has been a part of our lives. She’s captured each of our hearts in a different way. I’ve just been too standoffish to do anything about my feelings. I’m not one to sit in the spotlight. It’s not my scene, never has been and never will be. I’d rather sit back on the sidelines than have my own heart broken. Being single is better than being miserable. At least that’s what I continue to tell myself. Watching her grow up through the years, I’ve had my fair share of jealous moments. It’s not that I was too chicken shit to make a move or tell her how I felt, the timing was just never right. There was never the right moment to be who I wanted to be for her. Instead of pushing my way in, I took time to enjoy my life and the things that I thought made me happy. I’ve watched her flirt, date and mingle with assholes that, in the end, only hurt her or took advantage of her kindness and beauty. If only she could feel the liquid burn that runs through my veins every time she’s near me . . . maybe then she’d see how much love I really have for her.
Now standing here watching the hurt splayed across her face, I’m once again the man on the back burner. She’s obviously in love with my brother, not just my sibling . . . my fucking twin.
I want her to be happy and that’s exactly why I’ve stayed back, hiding in the shadows of the boys and men that have come and gone. She doesn’t see me as anything more than a friend, her rock and at the end of the day, I have to deal with that.
Looking back at the cage, I can see that Mike is being attended to by the coaches and staff. A sigh of relief hits me seeing them pull him up and onto his feet. Birch nods in my direction signaling he’s going to be okay, nothing a visit to the ER can’t fix I suppose. As I look back toward the front desk, Taryn’s complexion remains pale as Traci and Jamie move to comfort her. Fear is pouring from her eyes and I can’t help but want to go to her and tell her everything will be okay. Just as I’m about to grab my things and head off to the locker room, I see her bolt through the gym toward the back hallway. My feet make a split-second decision before my brain can comprehend what I’m actually doing. I need to follow her. I want to make sure she’s all right. I have to be there for her.
Running down the hallway, I peek into the office to see if she’s inside but she’s not. The desire to hold her tightly against my chest and console her takes over my every thought. Having witnessed what she just did, I can’t imagine what she’s feeling right now. Still in search of her, I open the back door and step out onto the parking lot. As I approach her car, through the window I see that her body is trembling while she holds her face within her hands.
For a few short seconds I contemplate what I should do. Perhaps my running to her rescue isn’t the right thing to do. The last thing she needs is another one of us boring into her soul and digging through the emotional turmoil she’s experiencing. But, I just can’t leave her, she means too much to me to sit back and watch her cry.
I wish I was strong enough to stay away, but I’m not.
Opening the driver’s side door, she turns to face me, letting her hands fall into her lap as the tears run down the smooth skin of her saddened face. My heart aches for her, those deep brown eyes now trimmed in red.
“Taryn,” I whisper falling down to the ground on my knees.
My hands instantly reach out to her, wanting to take away all the hurt and pain she’s feeling. A sob escapes her lips and I can’t hold back my need to have her body against mine. Leaning into her, my arms pull her body against my chest as the tears continue to fall.
“Shhh, don’t cry. I’m here and everything is going to be okay. Mike is going to be all right.”
“Why, Trenton . . . why?” she asks, gasping for air through her cries.
“They’re assholes just messing around. I’m sure Hank didn’t intend to hurt Mike . . . well, maybe a little, but not to the extreme he took it to in there. Mike’s a great fighter, this is nothing compared to half the shit he’s taken in the cage. He’s gonna be okay, doll face, please stop crying.”
“But he hurt him. He hurt him because of me, Trenton. I should never have come back here. Maybe wanting to be a part of the Cage was a mistake. Maybe I’m not supposed to be here. I need to leave and I’m sure Daddy would agree. I’m just going to hinder their training and I can’t have that weight put on my shoulders.”
I continue to hold onto her, running my fingers up and down her back. Seeing her this upset kills me, she should be loved, happy and free from anything that could cause her pain, yet here she is sobbing uncontrollably over two men who are so undeserving of her. After a few moments, her breathing slows and the sobs pulling from her chest stop. As she moves her arms from around my shoulders, she leans back against the seat. I can’t help but watch as she wipes her tear soaked face, makeup running down her cheeks. No matter what she looks like right now, she’ll always be the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.
“Thank you, Trenton,” she says, her eyes looking into mine.
“For what?” I ask, knowing very well she’s happy I’m here with her. I’m probably the biggest jackass on the planet, but I just want to hear her say it.
“You’re always there when I need you and right now I need you the most. I’m sorry I’m such a mess. I just can’t get over what I saw in there. I love them, I’m in lo . . .” she pauses for a second fiddling with the hem of her shirt between her fingertips. “It was just really hard to see them act that way. It’s not fair.”
Moving a strand of hair from her face, I gently tuck it behind her ear before wiping away another fallen tear.
“I know and I’m sorry you had to watch any of it. You shouldn’t have to sit back and see the two of them act like Neanderthals, but they love and care about you more than you realize. We all do,” I remark with a smile.
She releases a heavy sigh, grabbing onto the steering wheel with both hands so tightly her knuckles turn white.
“Hey, why don’t we get out of here? We can go grab a bite to eat or even catch a movie. Anything is better than sitting here in the back lot of the Cage,” I suggest, hoping she’ll accept my invitation.
Looking in my direction, a small smile pulls from her lips. I can see the wheels spinning in that pretty little head of hers as I silently pray she’s thinking of coming with me.
“Yes, please. Let’s get the hell out of here. A few hours of fun may be just what I need right about now. You are an amazing friend, Trenton. I don’t know what the hell I’d do without you in my life. You always seem to come around at the right time; I just wish I could do the same for you.”
She bites down on her lower lip as an overwhelming rush sweeps through me. Taryn has no idea the effect she really has on me. There’s no doubt in my mind she’s well aware of the undeniable crush I have on her, I just don’t think she gathers the love I honestly hold in my heart. A heart that longs to be one with hers. It sucks, more than anything, but if friendship is what she is willing to give, I’ll never turn my back on that.
Reaching for her hand, I help her step out of her car and lead her across the lot to my truck. Opening the door for her, I wait until she’s settled in place before I shut it and round the front. Before getting in myself, I quickly send a text to Birch telling him that we’re leaving and to keep me posted on what’s going on with Mike. As I move to open my door, I catch her staring in my direction. As pansy ass as I may seem, my heart races a beat faster knowing she was, in fact, looking at me. She may not be mine per se, but in this moment, she’s all I’ve ever wanted and more. Sliding into the truck, I flash her a smile and start up the engine. I’m not exactly sure what we’ll do, but the one thing I am aware of is that I need to keep her mind busy for the next few hours.