Chapter 11
I know I can do it. I’m an idiot to feel the way I do right now. My nerves are a tangled web of emotions and I’m staging a war within myself to get out of my car and into the Cage. It’s been months since the blow out between Trenton and Hank, yet I can’t bring myself to be in the same room with them again. Hank and I have crossed paths a few times. Times where I was afraid to look him in the eye, not because I was scared he’d hurt me physically, but because of the thoughts I knew very well were running through his mind. We fell apart before we ever knew what it was like to be together. We were a spiraling tornado that never should have hit the ground. We jumped on an impulse and I can honestly say that a relationship with him was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. I thought I knew what it was that I wanted, but I was wrong . . . so very wrong. My judgment was clouded and led by lust. Lust for something I thought I needed and wanted. But that huge mistake led me to the best thing in my life—my relationship with Trenton. The only regret I have is that now Hank and I are nothing more than strangers when we used to be best friends.
A tapping sound on my window pulls my attention away from my mental fixation. Looking to my left, Traci stands outside of my car with her hands on her hips and a smile across her face.
“What in the hell are you doing in there?” she asks.
Shrugging my shoulders, I reach for my purse and exit the car.
“I’m just fighting with myself,” I respond with a roll of my eyes.
“You’re a mess and I don’t know how many times I need to tell you to stay the hell out of that head of yours,” she remarks with a laugh. “What battle are you dealing with today?”
“It’s not funny and you know it,” I scold. “This is the first time I’m going to be in the same spot as them since Hank stormed out of his mother’s house.”
“Shut up! Seriously,” she mocks. “If the two of them can deal with their issues in the cage and still be able to walk away alive, I don’t think you should be burdening yourself in worry. I mean come on, Taryn, you’re creating more of an issue for yourself than is necessary. Hank knows you two are together. He may act like an ass about it, but you need to let that shit go and move on with your life.”
Allowing her worlds to sink in, I have to agree. It will be awkward and I don’t know if that will ever change, but I can’t keep holding back on how Trenton and I will live our lives because I’m concerned with how Hank will react.
“You’re right,” I admit.
“Whoa, did I just hear you correctly?”
“Yes, Mom. Now don’t let it get to your head. I’m going to talk to him. I need to get this charade over with once and for all. It’s eating all of us . . . err, me alive. I want things to go back to the way they used to be.”
“It’s about damn time, woman. And let me add . . . you’re lucky I love you, otherwise I’d push you in the cage and see who’s gutsy enough to throw the first punch.”
“Ha!” I laugh. “I may have been around the fights my whole life and even attempted to train at one point, but a true fighter I am not. I’ll just stay on the sidelines and cheer for my champion.”
“Awe, that’s sweet.”
“Ugh, you’re ridiculous. Let’s get ourselves inside and see what trouble we can get into before I lose my nerve.”
Together, Traci and I march ourselves through the back entrance of the Cage. I can’t quite explain the feelings that are rushing throughout my body. I’m more anxious in this moment than I’ve ever been in my entire life, yet I also feel a sense of liberation. I want all of us to go back to the friendships we once shared. I don’t want the anger, the silent treatments and the distance that’s been created. I want our old lives back. The situation is definitely unique, but I know now what I want and it’s about time I fought for my happiness in every aspect of my life.
As we approach the end of the hallway, the sounds of the fighters training pulls me back into the here and now. My eyes begin to scan over the large space of the gym. Men are scattered across the floor on the equipment, listening to their playlists as they fall into the zone of their routines. Looking further to the left, the wires of the cage embrace two strong fighters battling their strengths in a grueling war. I continue to search for the two men I need to find, to speak with and seek a way to find a resolve that will bring us all together again.
“Baby!” A familiar voice exclaims from behind me.
Turning on my heel, I watch as Traci rushes over to Mike. With her arms spread wide open he pulls her into him and lifts her up off the ground, spinning her in his arms.
“Morning, my love,” she coos.
“I wasn’t expecting you to show up today. I thought you were going to work on the nursery.”
“That was my plan, but I missed you and wanted to grab a few things I left here last night.”
“Well, I won’t complain about seeing you, but I need to get back to it.”
Resting her down onto her tip toes, he places a gentle kiss onto her forehead. With a wave of his hand, I return the gesture and continue to watch as he makes his way over to the cage.
With a smile spread across my lips, I couldn’t be happier for one of my best friends. I’m so proud of that man. He’s changed so much in the past year and he’s finally found his happily ever after. Even though he didn’t make it into the final round, he’s still maintained his training and supporting the last two fighters with all that he has. Life may not have dealt him the simplest of hands, but he’s embraced it and made the most of every opportunity.
“How ya feeling?” Traci asks.
Looking into her eyes, I continue to smile and nod.
“Good. I’m going to grab my things. If you need me, I’ll be right here.”
“Thanks, girl,” I reply before giving her a hug.
Pulling away from her, my eyes shift back to the gym floor and I spot them walking out of the locker room. My heart immediately falls out of my chest and onto the floor while my palms begin to sweat and my head spins. This feeling is so overwhelming and I know I need to shake it. I know I need to talk with them and get this over with, today.
Taking in a deep breath, I begin to walk in their direction. Trenton sees me first, his dark eyes smiling. A calming sensation quickly takes over knowing that he loves me and that he’ll always be here to pick me up when I fall. Shifting my gaze from him, Hank sees me as well. Both men stop in their tracks as I stand only a few feet away.
“H-hi,” I stutter.
Glancing down to my hands, they’re shaking like crazy.
“Taryn,” Trenton calls out to me.
Unable to take my eyes off my hands, I just shake my head.
I need to pull myself together. I have to remain calm so that I can talk to them both and say everything that’s been going through my head.
“C-can I talk to you guys?”
“Well, today must be my day. I woke up thinking I’d come into the Cage to train and I’m gifted with both of your presence and two talks in one morning. I should probably play the lotto too and see if this lucky day continues to pull through in my favor,” Hank says, rolling his eyes.
My eyes shoot up in his direction as tears begin to pool in my eyes.
“Hank! So much for you putting away the dick card,” Trenton states while punching him in the chest.
I watch, in utter confusion wiping away a fallen tear as they both smile.
What in the hell is going on?
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t let one last moment pass me by. It was too good of an opportunity.”
“You’re an asshole,” Trenton remarks.
“Yes, we are all very aware of that,” Hank says with a devilish smirk.
Staring in disbelief, I haven’t a clue as to what is taking place right in front of me.
“Let’s go into your dad’s office. He’s in a meeting with some new members and we’ll have the privacy we need in there, ” Trenton suggests.
“Okay,” I respond.
As I follow the two men through the gym, I can’t quite gather my original thoughts together. I’m so confused over what could have possibly transpired in the last few hours since I saw Trenton. The way those two were just interacting, I’d never have thought that they were enemies a few hours prior.
Did something happen?
Did Trenton talk to him without me knowing?
Did they come to terms with everything that’s happened over the last year?
Walking through the doorway of my father’s office, I don’t know what’s about to happen, but I do know that I’m not walking back through those doors without fixing what I’ve done.