Chapter Three
“It should’ve been left to me! I’m her daughter, aren’t I? I can’t believe she did this to me!” Aunt Simone’s words reverberated throughout the room, met by shocked glances from all the participants in the unfolding drama. No one uttered a word in response to Simone’s tirade. For a moment she looked around the room expectantly, as if waiting for confirmation of her beliefs. “Although I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. Mama ignored me my entire life. Why shouldn’t she continue her wicked ways straight to the grave?” Aunt Simone sent Sierra a look filled with disbelief and anger, then slammed her chair to the floor and ran from the room. Her ebony face was as angry as a storm cloud and tears of rage and humiliation flowed down her cheeks.
“Leave it to Lilliana Rose to have drama break out at the reading of her will,” observed Jason with a grim smile. “And I always thought Aunt Simone was the calm, cool, collected type.”
“Hush, Jason. It’s not funny. She’s so upset. Maybe someone should go after her,” suggested Sierra as she struggled with feelings of discomfort. She’d felt her aunt’s anger and disappointment, and she couldn’t help but sense that it was directed mainly at her. She now possessed something that her aunt desperately wanted—the Diamond Lil.
“Let her go soak her head,” Jacey muttered. “Grammy left us what she wanted us to have, Sierra. We can’t argue with that, like it or not. All we should feel is gratitude, pure and simple.”
Yancy walked over to Sierra and placed his arm around her shoulder and squeezed it hard. Silently, she marveled at the older man’s rugged good looks that had miraculously managed to withstand the test of time. Sierra listened intently as Yancy explained, “Your grandmother wanted you to have the Diamond Lil. She said it over and over again through the years. There was no one else on this earth she believed who could do a better job at maintaining the ranch. She said you were the only other person she’d ever known who loved the Diamond Lil as much as she did.”
Sierra furrowed her brow as she listened to Yancy’s explanation. “But I don’t live in Briarwood. How can I possibly run the ranch from New York?”
Yancy looked edgy for a moment, and he appeared to be struggling for the right words. Finally he spoke up. “Sierra, there is a stipulation in Lilliana Rose’s will. It states that in order to get your inheritance you have to relocate to Briarwood. If you don’t relocate, you’ll lose everything she bequeathed you, including the stocks and the money.”
“Why would she make a special stipulation like that? Jacey lives in Paris and there was no special stipulation with her inheritance.” Sierra couldn't hide her frustration as she posed the question to the man who had known all of Lilliana Rose’s secrets and wishes. Yancy was grim-faced as he responded, “There are reasons, Sierra. Mainly, there is no way you could run the Diamond Lil from New York. Sure, you could have the ranch hands and the foreman doing all the work and all, but you wouldn’t be runnin it. And the Diamond Lil needs runnin.” For a moment Yancey’s eyes were hooded as he explained, “Things haven’t been going too well lately with the Diamond Lil. Lilliana Rose was too sickly to make a difference in turning things around, and your daddy....well, he never took to the ole Diamond Lil. He’s a company man. Hollis is doing a mighty fine job as the foreman, as usual, but things have taken a turn for the worse since your grandmother’s illness.”
“Yancey, tell me everything!” Sierra demanded. “If I’m going to give up my entire life and career back in New York, and I’m not saying yet that I am, I need to know what I’m in for.” In all honesty her job as a photographer had failed to captivate her heart and mind as of late. While she had a large group of friends in the city, they were superficial friendships rather than lifelong relationships that were based on common interests, mutual respect and an abiding love for each other.
“Why don’t you make an appointment to meet with Sam Jarvis to discuss the Diamond Lil. Sam and Hollis can tell you everything you need to know about the troubles,” Yancey advised. “Two months ago Sam stepped in as an advisor of sorts. Honestly, he’d be the best one to talk to.”
“I’ll do that,” she said with a nod. Yancey squeezed her arm before walking across the room toward her father. Her brain was working overtime trying to piece together all the facts Yancy had disclosed to her. Her grandmother had bequeathed her the Diamond Lil, but in order to inherit the ranch she had to move back to Briarwood. And there was her aunt Simone to consider. Clearly, she was angry and disappointed over her bequest. Would it be fair to Aunt Simone to stay in town and assume control of the Diamond Lil? Would it be fair to herself to be so near to Caleb yet unable to be with him?
Could she bear to live in Briarwood and torture herself with the knowledge that Caleb was only miles away, yet still out of her reach? Even though he had treated her civilly this afternoon at the funeral, she had detected a simmering anger beneath the surface. An anger that had wounded her heart more than his cruel indifference. In their relationship Caleb had never once raised his voice in anger toward her or gone out of his way to hurt her. He had been a hot-headed youth, filled with resentment and pain due to his poor background, but he had also been a caring and sensitive young man. He had always treated her with respect, kindness and devotion.
Her mother appeared at her side, drawing her out of her reflections on Caleb and forcing her to concentrate on the present. “Honey, Hollis just called from the Diamond Lil,” her mother said in an urgent tone. “There’s been some trouble over there with the livestock. It sounds serious. They’d like someone from the family to go over and check it out. Considering the ranch now belongs to you, I think it should be you.”
***
Caleb arrived at his mother’s house after two hours of searching fruitlessly for his grandfather. He knew from experience that his grandfather could be missing for weeks. Endless days in which his mother and father would be consumed with worry and fear.
When he entered the modest, two story home his mother was sitting at the kitchen table, a concerned look etched on her youthful looking face. Lola’s mahogany colored skin was flawless and without a single wrinkle. Her jet black hair was cut in a short, closely cropped style. Lola was a former Ms. Texas, and she still had the face and figure of a beauty queen. Much to her three sons’ dismay, Lola could still turn male heads from a block away without even trying. Every now and then one of the boys had to step in and talk sense to an admirer who crossed the line from friendly to downright rude. Of course it tickled Ms. Lola to no end that her sons watched over her like paid bodyguards.
“You couldn’t find him?” she asked Caleb anxiously as he entered the kitchen, her hands clasped in prayer in front of her.
“I caught up with him, Ma,” he explained with a grimace. “But I lost him at the cemetery. I’m sorry I couldn’t bring him back here.” Caleb hated disappointing his mother and it ate at him that he couldn't ease her burden.
Lola waved her hand in the air as if to dismiss her son’s apology. “Don’t you dare apologize, Caleb. It’s not your fault. I know how wily your grandfather can be...especially when he’s on a bender.”
Caleb slammed his fist on the kitchen table, his voice reflecting his utter disgust as he said, “If I hadn’t been so busy talking to Sierra I would’nt have lost sight of Poppy. It is my fault!”
Lola raised her eyebrow and stared intently at her son. “Sierra Jackson, huh? You two were inseparable back in the day. She was your first love, if I remember correctly?”
“Yeah, for what it's worth,” Caleb said tersely, reluctant to talk about matters of the heart with his mother.
Lola gazed at Caleb intensely, her face filled with a look of understanding and compassion. Although her oldest son had a rough and tough exterior, she knew that he had a heart as big as the state capital. She also knew that ever since Sierra Jackson broke her son’s heart, he'd never given it to another woman. Sometimes she wondered if he ever would.
“She’s the one who broke your heart, isn’t she?” she asked somberly.
“I never said anyone broke my heart, Ma,” he responded in a defensive tone.
“You didn’t have to.” Lola reached up and caressed the side of her son’s face, her fingers gentle and reassuring. “I know my boys inside and out. You tried to hide the pain by going out and carousing with your friends and dating all of the wrong girls, but it didn’t mend your broken spirit. There was still that look of deep pain on your face. Nothing or no one could erase it.” She nodded her head wisely. “That’s the kind of pain loving brings, son.”
Caleb shrugged nonchalantly and said, “It was a long time ago, Ma. I got over it. A lot of women have come and gone since Sierra.”
Lola looked at her son with a shrewd eye and said, “That may be true, Caleb. But how many did you love? How many did you really want in your life?”
Not a one, Caleb answered silently as his mother raised herself up from the table and made her way to the oven to check on her lemon cookies.
Not a single one. Over the years he had wondered if there wasn’t something missing in him. He had asked himself if there wasn’t a deep, dark void in the place where his heart should reside. The only woman he had ever truly loved had faded out of his life like a fleeting rainbow after a summer shower. Her cruelty and indifference had jaded him so badly that he’d vowed never to give his heart to another woman. And he hadn’t.
That old feeling of unworthiness crept over him as he thought about Sierra. Once again he was the poor Matthews boy from the other side of town. She was the princess with the priceless pedigree and the prestigious family name. She had been born into the richest family in the entire county, he thought with disgust, while his family had barely eked out an existence. It had been painfully obvious that their differences had made it impossible for Sierra to think of him as a permanent fixture in her life. Although he had loved her with all of his heart and soul, and would have cheerfully died for that love, she had merely been passing time. Even now the unfairness of it all caused a burning sensation to spread through his gut.
Nobody ever said life was fair, he reminded himself bitterly. Sometimes life could be downright cruel. He had learned that valuable life lesson one hot June morning at the Jacksons’ homestead.
He couldn't shake the memory of that fateful day, for it was the day his lofty dreams had died at the hands of a woman he would’ve given his life to protect and honor. As hard as he had tried to erase the memories of his humiliation and despair, it remained with him, branded into his soul. Never to be forgotten, because to forget would be to repeat. And he would never walk down that road again - ever!
His relationship with Sierra had been going strong for nine months. They had gone to her senior prom a week earlier, two teenagers in love, bonded by love and their dreams of a future together. A future they had discussed in glowing detail dozens of times. They’d talked about the white picket fence, a houseful of babies and making a living on a cattle ranch of their own.
Life had never seemed as perfect to Caleb. But on this particular summer morning he’d felt worried. Sierra had broken a lunch date with him the previous day with no phone call or explanation. It wasn’t like her to do such a thing. She was the most considerate person he knew, as well as being punctual. She would never blow off a date with him, unless something was wrong. When she had failed to return any of his phone calls, his instinct had warned him that something was wrong. Fearing that he’d said or done something to upset Sierra, he had revved up his motorcycle and headed toward the homestead, intent on talking with her and getting to the bottom of the problem.
Sierra’s grandmother, Lilliana Rose, had opened the door after he’d summoned his courage and banged on the ornate, brass knocker shaped like a mustang. He’d known on sight that the woman who opened the door - the petite, gray-haired woman who stood majestically before him like a reigning queen - was Lilliana Rose. She was just like he’d thought she’d be: tough, regal and imperious. And every instinct in his body had called out to him in the instant that their eyes connected - this woman wasn’t going to be easy on him.
“Good morning, Mrs. Jackson. My name is Caleb Matthews. I’d like to see Sierra, if it’s possible.” His voice had been intentionally polite and well-mannered, sounding like the typical boy next door as he addressed Sierra’s grandmother. He had wanted to make a good impression on Lilliana Rose and his Mama always told him that polite manners were the best way to open closed doors.
“Well, sugar, aren’t you just the sweetest thing on two feet. Was my grandbaby expecting you to come calling today, Carson?” she’d drawled. Although Lilliana Rose’s voice oozed sugar and honey, her dark, unflinching eyes reflected her tough personality and an inner core made of steel.
“Caleb. My name is Caleb,” he interrupted in an impatient voice. “Can I please speak with Sierra, ma’am? It’s very important.” Caleb’s eyes begged Lilliana Rose to show him into the homestead and point him toward Sierra. He was desperate to see her and he knew it was written all over his face.
“I’m sorry, son. Keeping names straight tends to get confusing what with so many boys coming round to call on Sierra all the time. I guess it goes along with being a seventeen year old, huh son? Flirt, flirt, flirt.”
“Boys? What boys?” Caleb had frowned as he posed the question. The thought of other boys coming to visit Sierra made him feel sick to his stomach. He shook off the feeling, choosing instead to believe that Lilliana Rose didn’t know what she was talking about. There were no other boys in Sierra’s life. She was his girl. Only his.
Lilliana Rose waved her hand in the air and said, “Too many boys to count, Carlton-,” she began.
Caleb interrupted, “My name is Caleb. I don’t mean to be rude, but could I see Sierra? I really need to talk to her.” He didn’t have time for small talk. It was important that he straighten this whole situation out now. Something didn’t feel right.
Lilliana Rose shook her head and made a clucking sound with her mouth. “I’m sorry, son. It isn’t possible. My grandbaby isn’t here.”
For some unknown reason an alarm began to sound within him and he felt his heart tighten within his chest. Something was terribly wrong. He could feel it in his gut.
Suddenly his mouth felt dry. He couldn’t speak. His tongue felt thick, almost too thick to move. He couldn’t ask where she was...something inside of him was warning him not to ask that question. Because he knew that the moment Lilliana Rose answered his question the perfect happiness he’d shared with Sierra would crumble into dust, as if it had never existed at all.
Lilliana Rose continued to speak, her words echoing like a gunshot in the stillness of the sultry morning air. “She went to Paris for the summer. It was one of those spur of the moment trips with her mother, sister and Aunt Simone. We Jackson women sure are impulsive. We act first and then think later.”
“Paris? D-Did she leave a note for me? Or a message?” he asked anxiously. “Anything?”
Lilliana Rose smiled, then reached out and patted him on the head as if he was someone’s puppy. “Well, sugar, I sure hate to be indiscreet, but she did leave a few notes for a couple of boys, but I don’t remember seeing your name among them. If I remember correctly, there was a Bobby and a Derek and a Leroy...but not a Caleb.”
Bobby. Derek. Leroy. The names attacked him like a mortal enemy, and he suddenly felt as if someone had viciously kicked him in the stomach. The bile rose up in his throat, choking him. He was going to be sick. He could feel it coming, rising up within him. He was going to humiliate himself in front of Sierra’s grandmother by getting sick all over the place. He tried to take deep breaths, forcing himself to gulp in huge breaths of air and keep breathing. But how could he keep breathing when his world had stopped revolving?
No, it couldn’t be true. How could he have been so wrong about Sierra? What about all the promises and the words of love they had exchanged? Sierra had given her heart to him, or so he’d thought. He had been her first true love. She had said all those things and more to him in the sweetest hours, their private hours, between darkness and dawn when she had snuck out to meet him at the stables. Surely, it couldn’t have all been a lie?
Lilliana Rose had looked at him and then chuckled. “Run along now, son. There ain’t nothing for you here. Go on and git. Ain’t no grandbaby of mine gonna take up with no poor trash Matthews.”
Poor trash Matthews! He had hated the grand dame of the Diamond Lil in that moment, almost as much as he had hated Sierra for all her lies and manipulations. Lilliana Rose had stood on the doorstep of the homestead, a victorious smile on her face. She seemed happy that her granddaughter had stomped all over him and played him for a fool. That much was obvious by her triumphant smile and her giddy laughter.
He had stalked away from her doorstep with a murderous look in his eye, resisting the urge to pick up one of the huge stones on the walkway and hurl it into the huge, bay window of their beloved homestead.
She wasn’t worth it, he’d told himself. She wasn’t worth him being arrested and carted off to jail. She wasn’t worth the devastation his Mama would feel if he was arrested for doing such a thing. And there had been no doubt in his mind that Lilliana Rose would call the police on him if he messed with her precious homestead.
Instead he had hopped on to his Harley and driven like a maniac across the state, not stopping until sheer exhaustion forced him to pull over at a motel in the wee hours of the morning. And for the remainder of the summer he had ran with a rough crowd, indulging in hard liquor and wild nights around town. In a short time he had built up a bad reputation—Caleb Matthews, rebel without a cause.
And he hadn’t laid eyes on Sierra again. Despite the fact that he had swallowed his pride and written her half a dozen pleading letters begging her to contact him, she had never reached out to him. He hadn’t heard from her that entire summer, and as the summer turned to fall he’d heard around town that Sierra went to college in the East. Caleb headed down the path of least resistance - beer, women and lots of trouble.
And this morning Sierra had arrived on his doorstep looking strikingly like the gorgeous young girl who had haunted his dreams for eight years. But she wasn’t a girl anymore. She was a woman. And she had caused him to feel emotions that he hadn’t felt in years. Emotions he had long suppressed and denied.
But he couldn’t deny the ache inside of him. It was real and powerful. He still yearned for what he’d lost.
The sound of heavy boots stomping on the linoleum floor drew him out of his reverie and served as a warning that hurricane Drew was entering the room. Caleb studied his younger brother as he came crashing into the kitchen, looking like a caricature of the old-time cowboy. Although Caleb had told Drew a million times that his cowboy attire went way over the line in terms of fashion and good sense, Drew insisted upon dressing like Roy Rogers. And it didn’t seem to hurt his reputation with the ladies, Caleb mused. There was always some pretty thing on his arm willing to be his girlfriend.
“Hey, Caleb. I just got a call from Hollis over at the Diamond Lil. They’ve got a situation out there and he needs someone of your expertise to help out with things. He said that he’s been trying to reach you on your cell phone.” Drew’s words tumbled out of his mouth at the speed of an express train, and Caleb had to listen carefully to keep up.
“Situation?” Caleb muttered. “It’ll take more than a situation to get me to go out to the Diamond Lil.” He shook his head to indicate that he had no intention of going anywhere. “Not a chance, little brother. Call Hollis and tell him I’m in for the night and I ain’t budging. This has been some kind of a day!”
“You may want to rethink your position, Caleb,” Drew responded grimly. “The whole place is buzzing with excitement. Someone just slaughtered half a dozen cattle out at the Diamond Lil and left their carcasses for all and sundry to see.”
***
“Who would do such a vicious thing, Hollis?” Sierra gasped as she placed her hand over her mouth, resisting the urge to vomit. She reached for a handkerchief in her pocket and placed it over her nose and mouth to block out the foul smell emanating from the pasture. The sight of the butchered cows in the northern pasture by the band of oak trees was enough to make her fall to her knees. Tears of moisture sprang to Sierra’s eyes as she surveyed the foul scene.
Even though she had spent a large portion of her life at the Diamond Lil, nothing in her experience had ever prepared her for the sight of such brutality. The cattle raised on the Diamond Lil had always been treated reverently, sacredly and with the utmost respect. The sight that lay before her was an abomination, a gruesome distortion of her grandmother’s legacy. Sierra turned away from the grisly scene, knowing that it was too late for the image not to be engrained in her memory - the stuff of which nightmares were made.
Hollis shrugged in response to Sierra’s question, appearing as guileless as a small child as he tried to rationalize the situation. “I can’t begin to understand it myself. This makes the other incidents seem like child’s play.”
“Other incidents? What other incidents are you talking about Hollis?” Sierra questioned, her heart beating wildly as she waited breathlessly for Hollis to answer her. She had a great respect and admiration for Hollis Bullock, the man who had been serving as the foreman of the Diamond Lil. Hollis was a hard-working, religious man who ran the ranch with a strong work ethic and a heart of gold. There was nothing big or small that Hollis wouldn’t do for a neighbor, friend and on occasion, a stranger in need.
Hollis sighed and shook his head regretfully. “I hate to be the bearer of bad tidings, Sierra, but I would’ve thought that someone in your family might have discussed it with you by now.” Hollis cleared his throat and fidgeted, clearly uncomfortable with his assigned duty as carrier of bad news. “For the past six months the Diamond Lil has been plagued by trouble. All sorts of trouble. One day we found the barb-wire fence had been tampered with...that time half a dozen cattle were missing. Needless to say we never recovered them...rustlers got to em we figured. Another time there were threatening messages spray-painted on the side of the barn.”
“What type of messages? What did they say?” Sierra asked, her eyes widened in shock.
“Well, I seem to remember one of the messages saying something about getting even, and the other message contained slur words that I refuse to repeat in the presence of a lady,” Hollis drawled, scratching his grizzled beard as he spoke. “There were a few more minor incidents that we passed off as coincidences...but after today I can’t look at the situation in the same way anymore. Things are becoming mighty peculiar around here.”
“Did my grandmother know about this?” Sierra asked. Part of her hoped that her grandmother had remained in the dark about the situation at the Diamond Lil. She didn’t want to think that her grandmother’s last days on earth were spent worrying and wondering about the future of the ranch.
“I can’t rightly say. I didn’t see your grandmother much in the last few months, what with her being sickly and all. She didn’t come out to the Diamond Lil every day like she used to in the old days. I expect if anyone told her about the problems it would’ve been Sam or Bryce Jarvis. You know Bryce is working at the Diamond Lil now and he’s really taken a shine to the place. That boy’s a really good worker.”
Bryce had been in Jason’s class at St. Bartholomews Academy for Boys. He had been the late in life child for Sam Jarvis and his second wife, Hattie. At the time of Bryce’s birth, Sam had been older and childless, and as Sam always liked to brag, “No child on earth was more wanted or loved.”
Sierra chuckled, then said, “Bryce is working on the Diamond Lil? I’m a little surprised. I thought he was going to be the next big thing in the banking industry. The way I remember it, Bryce was always reaching for the brass ring. I don’t recall him ever being interested in ranching.”
Hollis quirked his mouth. “Well, Bryce got himself into some trouble in the banking industry. It wasn’t anything too bad from what I understand, just a few mix-ups at the bank. He really needed a job and Lilliana Rose recommended him. It gave him a fresh start.” Hollis scratched his chin and muttered, “Although his daddy was pretty upset by the whole mess.”
The sound of a car door slamming followed by the noise of boots scraping across the dirt drew Hollis and Sierra’s attention away from their conversation. She shielded her eyes from the sun, squinting into the distance as she automatically raised her hand in greeting to the new arrival. With the sun bearing directly down on her, all Sierra could make out was a tall, muscular figure dressed in dark jeans, a black Stetson and a white T-shirt. As the figure moved closer she caught a glimpse of his face—Caleb’s face, the dark, chiseled features jumping out at her and taking her by surprise.
Sierra watched Caleb walk toward her, his body all sinew and muscle, his stride powerful and easy. She didn’t like the fact that the brim of his black Stetson shielded his eyes from view. She wanted to see his eyes, to see the intent that lay within their fiery depths. She wanted to know if he was still on edge as he had been this morning, or if his demeanor was more contained as it had been at Pinecrest. More than anything she wanted to know what Caleb was doing here at the Diamond Lil.
Before she could ask, Hollis jumped in to explain Caleb’s appearance. “I hope you don’t mind that I called in Caleb Matthews, Sierra. If you don’t already know, he’s one of the most well-respected cattle ranchers in the area. There isn’t anything Caleb doesn’t know about cattle. Plus he’s had some experience with cattle rustlers and the like. He may be able to help us figure out what’s going on around here.”
Successful? Caleb was successful! She felt a burst of pride for Caleb, irrationally wishing that she could wrap her arms around him and congratulate him with a kiss. Years ago they had dreamed of such success, for both of them, although their dream had always been to run a cattle ranch together. Mr. and Mrs. Caleb Matthews. Their daydreams had always ended with a romantic wedding and promises to love each other for a lifetime. At least some of their dreams came true, she thought soberly, even if the dreams weren’t achieved together.
By way of a greeting Caleb tipped his hat in her direction, then removed the Stetson off his head completely, so that his entire face was visible. At the moment his eyes were unreadable, as were his thoughts as she watched him shake hands with Hollis. Once upon a time she had been able to read his thoughts, and he had been able to read hers, two people so united that they'd been linked on a higher plane. But that was a long time ago, she reminded herself. Those days were long gone.
***
Goodness, she looked beautiful, Caleb thought. Even in her white cotton T-shirt and her fitted jeans, Sierra managed to look radiant. He told himself not to stare, but he couldn’t help it, and for a moment he didn’t care what she thought of his intent gaze. He could see the tell-tale signs of worry on her face, the small wrinkles that marred her perfect brow and the slight twist of her mouth that denoted her unhappiness. For a brief moment he perused the scene, taking in the sight of the cows by the large oak trees. Once again he looked at Sierra’s face, and he saw the distress that she was trying so hard to hide from Hollis. There was fear in her eyes.
Caleb watched as Sierra shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. He knew his eyes had lingered way too long on her beautiful face. For all intents and purposes he was sizing her up. In the flesh she lived up to every dream he'd dreamt of her over the years. Was he subconsciously comparing her to the way she’d looked eight years ago? Was he looking for the seventeen year old girl who’d vowed to love him forever as they’d kissed under the brilliant Texas moon?
“Have either of you given any thought to this being a hate crime?” Caleb asked abruptly, his voice sounding harsher than normal to his own ears.
Sierra frowned at Caleb, her brow furrowed in confusion as she asked, “Hate crime? Why would you think that this is a hate crime?”
Caleb idly twirled a piece of straw in his hand, concentrating intently on the task as he answered Sierra’s question. “Well, let me see. Your grandmother was the owner of the largest, most profitable cattle ranch in the area. For decades she’s had a stranglehold on the industry, leaving little or no room for others to compete. Furthermore, she discovered oil on the adjacent property, thereby becoming richer and richer and richer.” Caleb’s tone was defiant and slightly mocking.
Although Hollis probably couldn’t detect the note of censure in his voice, Caleb knew that it probably sounded as if he was criticizing her grandmother and her entire way of life. Immediately, Sierra bristled.
Caleb continued, “Don’t you think it’s possible that someone may have resented an African American female doing so well for herself? Especially in a male-oriented arena? Don’t tell me that there aren’t a thousand people out there who resent her success.”
Like me, he wanted to say. I resented your whole family for their success, Sierra, and for years I’ve waited for my chance to turn the tables. And if you only knew how close I am to turning the tables, you’d slap me into next week.
“There may be people out there who resent her success, Caleb, but do you really think that this is about race? My grandmother owned this ranch for over sixty years and nothing like this ever happened,” she countered. “Sixty years ago people in the cattle industry weren’t exactly rolling out the red carpet for my grandmother, but no one ever messed with her. Little by little they accepted her.”
“Don’t you read the papers up in New York? Hate crimes are on the rise in this country. They happen every day in big towns like Houston and little towns like Smithville. The world can be an ugly place, and you need to realize that it’s a real possibility.”
“I’m not buying it,” Sierra said vehemently. “This feels so much more personal. It feels...so calculated. It feels like someone was trying to shock and awe. I can’t explain it, but I have a gut feeling on this one. It wasn’t a hate crime!”
Caleb rolled his eyes and let out a loud belly laugh. “Gut feeling? And just what is your gut feeling telling you? Is it telling you to run away again?”
Sierra froze at Caleb’s words. She looked shocked to the core that he had made such an innuendo in front of Hollis. He’d laid it right out on the table. He was deliberately baiting her, throwing the past in her face and using it to challenge her. He couldn’t seem to halt his tongue.
She jutted her chin upward. “I’m not running anywhere, especially since I’m the new owner of the Diamond Lil. My grandmother left it to me in her will. I have a responsibility to resolve this situation and to make sure the person or persons responsible for slaughtering our cattle and tampering with our property are prosecuted for their actions. I’m committed to this,” she said defiantly, her hands jammed in her back pockets, her chest thrust forward in challenge.
“Committed?” Caleb scoffed as his eyes raked over her from head to toe. “I heard that word from you a long time ago, but back then your word didn’t mean much. Tell me something, has that changed over the years?”
“Caleb! What is going on with you?” Hollis asked, his voice angry and stern. “I don't much like the way you're talking to Sierra.”
“He’s just getting something off his chest, Hollis,” Sierra explained in a calm, even voice. “Something he’s been wanting to say for a long time. It’s okay. I can handle it.” She folded her arms across her chest and met his gaze head-on.
It was way overdue, Caleb thought. Eight years to be exact. She knew he had every right to doubt her integrity.
Hollis looked extremely uncomfortable being caught in the middle of their drama. Rather reluctantly, Hollis excused himself, saying he was going to see about the cattle and getting rid of the remains. Before he left he turned towards Sierra and said, “There have been a lot of hate crimes in the state this year. Listen to Caleb. Don’t close yourself off to something just because you have a beef with the messenger. And by the way, I’m happy you’re going to be running the Diamond Lil. You remind me so much of Lilliana Rose.” Hollis turned toward Caleb and wagged his finger at him. “You behave yourself. Don’t make me regret calling you over here.” Hollis then turned and walked away, heading towards the pasture and the cows.
“There are other possibilities,” Caleb conceded as he smoothly veered the topic away from the past. Things were getting far too personal, he thought, and he knew he might explode under the pressure. He needed to get back in control of his feelings before he said things in the heat of the moment that he couldn’t take back.
“Such as?” she asked. Caleb had swiftly turned the conversation back to the incidents at the Diamond Lil, and for a brief moment she felt disappointed that he didn’t want to talk about the past. For a moment she’d seen the look of hurt and pain in his eyes, and she was truly shocked that after so many years her desertion still affected him. She didn’t dare to hope he still loved her, or that he nurtured any lingering feelings for her, because to dare to hope and then have those hopes dashed - the pain would be too unbearable, too devastatingly familiar.
“Revenge,” Caleb said simply, his tiger’s eyes clouding over with an emotion that Sierra couldn’t decipher.
“Revenge? For what?”she asked, her confusion evident in the look of disbelief on her face. She couldn’t think of anyone who’d want revenge on her family.
Caleb shrugged nonchalantly, then said, “Revenge is the driving force behind some of the worst acts we humans commit. Maybe Lilliana Rose was involved in a business deal that went sour. Or perhaps something went wrong with some of the cattle she sold and the person is striking back, using the Diamond Lil as its target. The possibilites are endless. You have to look into the records and talk to Hollis and Sam. Ask them if there were any disgruntled employees in the past few months or any problems that stick out in their minds. You have to dig deep.”
Sierra listened to Caleb intently. Her jaw hardened. It seemed as if she was summoning strength. “I’m in control of the Diamond Lil now. I’m the one calling the shots now that my grandmother has left me the ranch. And it’s my job to investigate all these strange occurrences that have been plaguing the Diamond Lil.” She bit her lip. “I’ve been away for a long time. I’m not sure I know where to even begin to start investigating.”
Caleb locked gazes with her. Don’t feel sorry for her, he warned himself.
“Will you help me?” she asked Caleb. The words flew out of her mouth. “I know you don’t owe me anything, but-.”
“You’re right. I don’t,” he responded in a voice heated by fierce emotion. “I didn’t come over here for you,” he said sharply. “I came because Hollis asked me to come.”
Sierra’s eyes glinted with emotion as she made her appeal. “If you ever loved me, Caleb, please help me. If I ever meant a single thing to you, please do this for me.” Her voice was pleading and filled with a yearning that sounded almost intimate to Caleb’s ears. He didn’t want to hear that yearning because it made him want all the years they’d lost together. It made him want Sierra - in his life, in his heart. Wherever he could have her. Because his life had never been sweeter than the days when he had held her in his arms, whispering eternal promises and exchanging vows of love.
If. If. The single word burned a hole right through him, sending him swirling into an abyss where dark, roiling emotions raged out of control. If he ever loved her? Was there no end to her cruelty and manipulations? She knew he’d loved her. The big joke was that she hadn’t loved him. She’d dumped him quicker than lighting, but now she needed him. Now she wanted him. Not him, he corrected himself. She needed his help. For the Diamond Lil. For the Jackson family dynasty, he thought bitterly.
***
Sierra saw the stubborn thrust of his jaw, the fiery eyes that showed both anger and something else she couldn’t put her finger on. Something elusive and mysterious. The very essence of Caleb. Impulsively, Sierra reached out and touched him on the side of the cheek, her fingers pulsing with fiery heat as they connected with his skin. She knew she should’ve resisted the urge, but she wanted so badly to touch him. She wanted to connect with him so much.
“Don’t touch me!” he said in a fierce tone that caused Sierra to take two backward steps. “I hate being manipulated. Don’t play mind games and throw the past in my face. Because if you do, I’m warning you, you’re walking on dangerous ground.” Caleb’s breathing was ragged and shallow, and he appeared to be struggling with his personal demons as he fought for control of his emotions.
Sierra stood by silently, afraid to speak, unwilling to shatter the ounce of civility that existed between them. So much had been shattered in the past. Too much, she thought. She wanted to rebuild the shattered trust, not demolish it. Had she gone too far in asking for his help? Or was it her tender touch that had sent him spinning out of control?
Caleb paused for a few moments, seemingly struggling for control before he continued to speak. “I’ll help you with the problems at the Diamond Lil, because if someone is killing cattle and tampering with property it affects all of us ranchers.” His eyes hardened. “Don’t think this is about you, Sierra. I don’t really have a choice in the matter. I’m helping myself and all the other cattle ranchers in the area.”
Relief and gratitude bubbled up inside of her. “Thank you!” She rushed toward him and threw herself against his chest. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around him. She looked up at him, jolted by the fact that they were in such close proximity. Before she knew it, Caleb was dipping his head down and capturing her lips in a tender yet dazzling kiss. Even though Sierra knew this was neither the time nor the place, she relaxed into the kiss, savoring it like a rare treat.
Suddenly Sierra felt Caleb’s arms gently pushing her away, and for a brief moment she clung to his arm to steady herself. She felt dazed from his kiss, from the way he’d held her in his arms, and by the way she’d wanted the kiss to go on and on. When she looked up at him she found herself staring into eyes that were filled with nothing but regret. Her stomach lurched as Caleb pivoted on his heel and quickly walked away from her, leaving her to join Hollis and the ranch hands in the northern pasture where the dirty business of disposing of the cows commenced. Sierra touched her lips, still dazzled by the intensity of Caleb’s kiss. Strangely, she felt as if he had branded her. As always, she felt like Caleb’s girl, even though she was now a woman.
Lord, please help me. It’s so hard to figure out whether or not to tell Caleb the truth about what drove us apart. Is it better to bury the past or address it? Will he even understand the pressure she’d been under or her divided loyalties? Give me strength to do what’s right.
It was time, she realized. It was time Caleb knew the truth about their break-up. It was time he learned that they had been separated through lies and deception. It was time he realized that despite the distance and the years that had passed, she still loved him. Fiercely. Devotedly. Forever.
With this knowledge came the fear. Her greatest fear of all. The fear that even if Caleb knew the truth about her grandmother’s deception, it wouldn’t change a thing. He still wouldn’t love her in return.