Chapter 15
Cassie
Brianna and I sit in the lounge room after a long Monday, me with my notebook scrawling out lyrics while Brianna scrolls through Facebook, searching for anything worthy of her attention.
I scan over the last few pages of notes I’ve written and realise a change in my writing. It almost seems lighter in a strange way. I flick back a few more pages and compare the differences. Yep. Definitely light, doesn’t seem so dark anymore.
I know the moment I left for New York, it was all about heartbreak but then my parents died and a dark depression slipped into it. I feel as though being home for the past few weeks has begun to heal me, cleanse me from the inside out and I know exactly how it has happened.
Brianna starts spilling out the latest gossip about who knows what while trying to talk over the sound of the T.V, which neither of us is actually paying any attention to. There’s a knock at the door and we look at each other, both with confusion lacing our features.
“You invite anyone over?” I ask.
She shakes her head while giving a very un-ladylike shrug, though, ladylike is not something Brianna has ever claimed to be.
“So, I’m assuming I have to answer it?” I groan as I start getting up from the comfort of my lounge.
“Yuuup,” she sings as her attention falls back to her Facebook.
I trudge to the door and open it up to find a very handsome man standing at my door with a pizza. How very romantic. “Are you lost?” I smirk as I position myself in front of the door and lean against the frame to block his entry. The sight of him standing at my door has my heart warming, especially the fact that he feels he can just come and drop by unannounced like he used to like he feels he belongs here.
“Not me,” he replies with a twinkle in his blue eyes.
I stare him down, trying to keep a straight face. “What are you doing here, Jax?” I question, though, the intrigued tone of my voice is a dead giveaway.
He shrugs his shoulders, “You know,” he says as if he doesn’t have a care in the world. “I was in the neighborhood.”
“Right,” I reply, leaning fully against the doorframe so I can cross my arms over my chest. I watch as his eyes dart to my now pushed up cleavage and grin as his eyes heat with excitement. “You just happened to have a pizza on standby in your truck?”
“Your Mum would have been the first to chew me out had I shown up empty-handed,” he explains.
“True,” I smile, thinking of all the times mum had done just that. “I thought you were on a strict diet for hockey?” I ask.
“I am,” he says, “This is for you.”
I eye the pizza and take a deep breath, taking in the heavenly aroma and knowing he would have brought me pepperoni. “And what are you going to eat?”
He lets out the smallest chuckle as he steps forward into my space. A wicked smirk crosses his features as the twinkle in his eye from earlier returns. He slides an arm around my waist and pulls me into him, sending a surge of electricity through my bones. I lick my lips and my bottom lip instantly disappears in between my teeth. I’m practically panting before he has even spoken. “I’m eating you.”
Seeing my reaction to his closeness has his own eyes darkening. I feel him hardening and I press myself against him trying to relieve the ache he has managed to cause in the last thirty seconds. He pushes me through the door and drops the pizza on the ground before crashing his lips into mine.
I moan into his mouth as he lifts me and takes us to my room. I don’t think I will ever get used to the feeling of his lips on mine again, it still seems like a dream, as if it’s all happening in my mind. Could this be real? Is he really starting to come around? I know it’s a long shot, but is he finally starting to forgive me?
I distantly hear the door slam and realise we must have left it open, either that or Bri has stolen my pizza and made a run for it. Actually, on second thought there is no way I am leaving this room to find even a slice of pizza left.
Thoughts of pizza disappear from my mind the moment I am thrown clear across the room, off Jax’s strong body and come down slamming into the centre of the bed. He is on me before I even have a chance to squeal. Urgency and need shine in his eyes and I know without a doubt he can see the same in mine.
My hands desperately find the waistband of my pants and I struggle to pull them down while he tries to rip my shirt over my head. I get my pants to my knees before giving up and using my feet to kick them off. My pants have hardly hit the ground before my fingers are clutching at his shirt.
His lips come down on mine and I have to pull away before I get lost in his kiss. “No,” I pant, “I need you now.”
He grins and pushes himself up off the bed and I must say, the undone belt buckle on the low riding dark jeans with no shirt, showing off the magnificent ‘V’ and perfect sculptured abs and chest. WOW, I could come before he even touches me.
He smirks as he watches me checking him out. “See something you like?” he teases as he kneels one knee on the end of the bed, reaches forward, grabs me under my knees and hauls me to the end of the bed so just my legs are dangling off.
He takes my knees and slowly separates them as if he is opening a long-awaited gift. His eyes flame and I can’t hold back any longer. “You need to touch me now, Jax,” I demand.
“With pleasure,” he groans as he drops to his knees before me and throws my legs over his shoulders.
Holy shit, this man is hot.
He dives in like a fucking pro on Christmas morning and I’m instantly seeing stars, in fact, I see stars four glorious times before he collapses on the bed beside me, utterly spent.
“Wow,” I pant as I try to catch my breath. “You can come over here and do that any time you please,” I grin.
He lets out a laugh before pulling his jeans back on. “In that case, I better feed you so you have enough energy for tomorrow night.”
“Is that a promise?” I ask, getting out of bed on shaky legs and slipping on my silk nighty.
“Fuck,” Jax says taking in my attire, “It’s a damn guarantee if you’re going to be wearing that,” he says as he pulls me into his hard body and lets his hands roam over me, feeling the silk under his fingers.
“Well, if you give me a little warning next time, I bet I could find something a little more exciting than this,” I grin, thinking of the whole Victoria’s Secret collection in my top drawer.
We head back out to the lounge room to find Bri asleep on the couch with the empty pizza box resting on her full tummy. With a chuckle, Jax pulls out his phone and takes a quick picture before explaining himself. “It’s Bri,” he says, “I’m bound to blackmail her one of these days, especially with you as her roommate.”
I roll my eyes and watch as he swiftly picks her up off the lounge and pops her down in her bed. He returns a moment later with a DVD from her room and orders Chinese while remembering all my favourite dishes. He slides the disc into place and snuggles with me on the lounge until the food comes, reminding me of the millions of times we did this as kids.
I have barely finished my dinner before I’m also falling asleep on the lounge. I’m pretty sure Jax finishes the movie with me snoring on his shoulder before he dumps me in my own bed with a kiss on the cheek.
I wake to my alarm and groan as Bri comes bounding in at six in the morning. Why the hell did we make this stupid pact to run every damn morning? “Oh, thank god,” she says in relief, noticing that Jax didn’t stay the night. “I wasn’t sure if I’d walk in on your morning screw or not.”
“You could have always knocked,” I suggest.
“Oh hell no,” she laughs, “I mean, I don’t want to see you getting it on but I’m sure watching Jax would be a real treat.”
“Ugh, you’re so annoying,” I laugh as I get out of bed and pull on my training crop and running shorts.
“I know,” she smiles, “But you love it. Now, let’s go.”
I follow her out of our house while I tie my hair back and attempt to close the door behind me with my ass. The chilly Denver morning has me desperately wanting to rush back inside to my warm bed but I am not that weak. I shook on this stupid pact and I will see it through.
We start off with a slow jog to get our bodies warmed up before getting into a proper run when a shiver takes over my body. I glance around me, having the strangest feeling that I can sense someone’s eyes on me. I take a good look but in the darkness, I find nothing. I’m probably just imagining things.
I turn back to face the path, only to have my strange feelings and thoughts interrupted by chatty Cathy next to me. “So, what’s the story with Jax?” Bri asks. “Last I heard you were heading to the wedding with a broken heart and now he is showing up at our door with dinner for me and three orgasms for you.”
“Four orgasms actually, but thanks for keeping count,” I laugh.
“What are friends for,” she grins.
I roll my eyes and get on with the story. “My stupid brother invited him to be one of his groomsmen at the wedding. None of the pricks decided it was a good idea to tell me though.” I explain.
“Yeah, I kind of figured he was at the wedding,” she muses. “But it doesn’t explain how things changed.”
“Well, if you’d quit interrupting me, I would be able to tell you,” I say as I give her a pointed look. She holds her hands up in surrender then makes a show of zipping her lips and throwing away the key. I roll my eyes at her maturity levels but can’t help cracking a smile. “Well, it was up to the speeches part of the night and Logan and Carter mentioned our parents so naturally, I got all emotional and started crying so I ducked outside and Jax followed me out. He made me feel better before he tore into me with an interrogation and I guess he finally got the answers he was after because he seemed… I don’t know, at ease, I guess.”
“Wow,” she says. “So, what does this mean? Are you guys back together now?”
“Honestly, I have no idea,” I tell her with a sigh. “He hasn’t really told me where we stand so I guess I’m just taking what I can get at the moment.”
She seems deep in thought for a moment before cringing and turning to me, “And if he is still screwing around and giving the rest of the girls on campus anything they can get?”
“Then, you may as well shoot me now,” I tell her. She gives me a look to suggest I’m being a moron which I must agree, I might have taken that a little too far. “Look,” I say, explaining myself. “You and I know two very different Jaxon’s. You know him as the trophy-winning manwhore of campus, where I know him as the man who loved and protected me since I was a kid. He has strong values and is a respectable man, no matter who he portrays himself to be now, I guess I just have faith that while he is trying to sort out this thing with me that he wouldn’t consider sleeping with someone else.”
She watches me for a moment and must decide she likes what she is seeing and moves on. “Ok,” she says with a nod, “Out of everyone on campus, you’re the only one who knows the real Jaxon so I’m going to take your word for it.”
“Thank you,” I smile as we head around a corner.
“So, what do you think is holding him back?” She asks.
“My guess is the fact that I left before. I mean, he is a man, he isn’t going to admit to me that he is scared of getting hurt but I think that’s what it is. I hurt him really bad when I left and I don’t think he trusts me anymore.”
“Well, that’s a simple fix. You need something to prove to him that you’re in it for the long haul,” she says.
“And what would that be?” I ask.
“I’m not sure you’re going to like the idea, but I’m just going to put it out there. It’s totally artificial but I think it just might work.” She says before becoming mute and concentrating on her run. Great, I guess I’ll just have to wait and see what the little she-devil has in mind.
We turn another corner and I instantly see the group of guys heading our way on the opposite side of the road, though, today we will play it smart. I am not getting thrown over any shoulders this morning. The boys come nearer and I can’t help but grin at Jax.
I have absolutely no plan in mind but I give him an evil smirk and cross the road to run directly in front of him, the same way he had done to me. His eyes narrow on mine and my smirk gets bigger but he doesn’t move. Damn it, the guy is calling my bluff. He grows closer and I do the only thing I can possibly think of. “Get ready to bolt,” I murmur to Bri as I reach behind her and pluck the little water bottle out of the special waistband of her shorts.
I pop the lid as quickly as possible and drench Jax just as fast. His mouth pops open as he registers what the hell is going on. I see the look in his eyes before he even moves. I scream for mercy and take off like a bat out of hell, dragging Brianna behind me.
We have to stop running as we catch our breaths and walk for a minute. “He is going to get you back for that,” she warns me.
“I know,” I grin, absolutely loving these little games with Jax. “I can’t wait.”
We get back into our jog when another runner passes us and does a double take. “Oh hey,” he says, backing up and jogging backward in front of us so that we don’t have to stop. Something pulls at a memory as I take the guys face in but I can’t for the life of me remember why but something is screaming at me that it’s not good.
“Um, hello,” I say as Bri gives him a slightly awkward wave.
“You’re Cass right?” he asks with an odd look in his dark eyes, a look that tells me he doesn’t actually need my clarification. I can’t explain it but something is putting me on edge with this guy. I give a hesitant nod before he continues. “I’m Matt, I’m kind of that dickhead who groped you at Micky’s the other week.”
“What?” I ask in shock as I stumble over my own feet. Holy shit. This is the guy who practically attacked me at Micky’s, had Jax not been there I probably would have ended up bruised and bloodied in the back alley behind the bar, actually, what am I saying? He did leave me bruised and bloodied.
“Yeah,” he cringes. “I, ah, just wanted to apologise about that.”
“Oh, um,” I say a little uncomfortable, desperately needing to get away from this guy. “Yeah, it’s fine,” I say hoping that’s enough to send him on his way.
“What?” Brianna barks out in horror, startling us both. “It’s not ok,” she demands then gets right into the guys face as anger radiates all over her. “You touched her when she said no. You ground your dirty, sweaty body into her when she said no. You kissed her neck after she said no. You wanted more when she struggled against you,” she continues as her face starts turning red. “You bruised her skin and tried to force your hand down her pants. None of that is ever ok. She was lucky that Jax was there to knock your sorry ass out or she probably would have ended up in the hospital completing a rape kit.”
Woah. Go, girl.
Matt’s eyes grow dark and angry and he leans over Bri, getting back in her face. “I’m not a rapist,” he roars at her. I notice his fists beginning to clench into fists at his side and it looks like he is physically trying to hold himself back from hitting her.
Where the hell is the bunch of hockey boys when you need them?
“Could have fooled me,” Brianna grunts then takes a calming breath. “Look, I don’t know you. I doubt it but you might even be a nice guy when you’re not drunk, but the way you acted against Cass at Micky’s was unacceptable and quite honestly, it freaked out every woman in that bar. You need to get yourself help or you’re going to end up in a jail cell.”
He scowls down at her before glancing back at me with narrowed eyes and taking off. “Holy shit,” I say to Cass. “You really put the fucker in his place.”
“Yeah, I did,” she grins then admits, “I’ve actually been thinking about that a lot. I’ve had the whole speech planned out for weeks now.”
“I can only imagine,” I laugh as we pick up where we left off.
“I can’t believe you were going to let him off the hook,” she says.
“I know, I didn’t want to but the guy gives me the creeps, I just wanted him gone,” I tell her.
“Yeah, I get it,” she says. “But I think guys like that, who think its ok to act that way towards women need to be put in their place.”
“Agreed,” I sigh. “Let’s just hope we never have to see the bastard again.”
We cut our run short and head home before getting on with our day. I finish classes just after lunch and am heading home when I get a call from Bri. “Hey where are you?” she asks.
“Just about home, why?”
“Oh good,” she says a little too giddy which puts me on edge. “You know how we were talking about doing something to prove to Jax that you’re committed?”
“Yes,” I say slowly.
“Awesome,” she sings through the phone. “I’ll meet you in ten.”
Damn her. If only I could read her mind.
Bri gets home a few minutes after me and instantly grabs my car keys before physically putting me in my passenger’s seat and driving off. “Where are you taking me?” I ask, warily.
“Can’t tell you. You’ll think about it too much and back out.”
I let out a groan but don’t bother pushing her on it. I know it’s no use, she’ll never crack.
“Hey,” I ask as she hums away to herself while navigating the afternoon traffic. “Did you steal my favourite black lace panties?”
“Eh?” she grunts looking at me like I’ve lost my mind. “I don’t want your dirty ass underwear. Who knows where that shit’s been?”
I roll my eyes. “So that’s a no?” I clarify.
“Hell yes, it’s a no,” she laughs. “Did you check the laundry? Sometimes the machine eats my socks or maybe it got stuck behind the vanity in the bathroom,” she suggests with a secretive grin. “I’ve lost a few things behind there.”
I ignore her later comments. “I’ve checked everywhere, even the washing machine, they’re not there. I’ve pretty much turned the whole house upside down,” I sulk.
She cracks a grin. “Maybe Jax stole them. He might have become sentimental of his conquests over the past three years. He probably has a drawer full of used panties with a polaroid picture of the girl passed out afterward stapled to them.”
“Ugh,” I groan. “Jax isn’t a creepy fetish guy.”
She shrugs her shoulder. “Just saying. How well can anyone truly know another person?”
The conversation is cut short when she starts reverse parking my car like a pro. We hop out of the car and she loops her arm through mine and starts leading me through a maze of shops. She stops by a liquor shop and grabs a bottle of vodka before silently continuing her journey.
My nerves start to spike. Where the hell is she taking me?
“Better start drinking,” she says, handing me the bottle. I reluctantly take it and crack the seal before taking a burning sip.
She suddenly takes a turn into an open shop and I have to backtrack to get a good look at where the hell we are when her plan becomes extremely clear. “What?” I shriek, “You want me to get a tattoo?”
“No,” she says. “I want you to get your nipples pierced,” she tells me with as much sarcasm as she can possibly muster up before breaking out into a wide grin. “Yes, dumbass. You’re getting a tattoo,” she says, “You better make it something symbolic between you two as well.”
“Oh my god, Bri. This idea is ridiculous,” I tell her.
“No, sweet cheeks. It’s fantastic.”
I have to admit, her plan does have a little merit. If Jax can see that I’m dedicated enough to get something permanently put on my skin to symbolise how much I love him then surely, he can see that I’m here for good, right?
I lift the bottle of vodka to my lips and take a deep pull before turning to the man behind the counter. “Let’s do this shit.”