Chapter 9
Jade
“About as much fun as watching paint dry.”
~ Nora O’Sullivan
“So, you said that you started your own business?” Dennis asked just as my eyes were drooping heavily.
I forced them back open. “Oh yes. I did.”
I really should’ve ordered a cup of coffee instead of a third glass of wine, but I needed something to get through the snooze-fest that was date number three. I knew I was in trouble when the first fifteen minutes of dinner were dedicated to a conversation about his food allergies. Believe it or not, it had been downhill from there. He had a flag—yes, a flag!—collection, and he was a podiatrist. A doctor of feet. And on that, all that could be said was he had definitely followed his passion because he loved him some feet.
Over the course of dinner I’d learned that the foot and ankle have one quarter of the bones in the human body, twenty-six to be exact. There are over a hundred ligaments and tendons and thirty-three joints. They have over eight thousand nerves and a quarter of a million sweat glands. This information, while fascinating, was not exactly my idea of great dinner convo.
He was a nice guy though and he wasn’t bad looking. Actually, he was handsome in a clean-cut, preppy kind of way. He had a strong, square jaw, blond hair that had a slight wave to it, and his eyes were a deep shade of brown. The eyes had stood out in his profile picture. They looked kind. And it turned out they were, but kind wasn’t enough to keep me from falling asleep. Literally. I was dozing off.
In fairness, it wasn’t all his fault. I’d barely slept the night before. I’d tossed and turned in a restless fit. I couldn’t stop replaying my conversation with Hayden in his truck. It was all I could think about.
After Hayden dropped me off, I’d had a good cry over what could’ve been. What would I have done if Hayden hadn’t come back to Wishing Well? If I’d been going to his funeral? I’d spent so much time and energy being angry at him for leaving me and then angry at him for coming back, that I hadn’t considered the alternative. Now that I had, I was pretty sure I needed professional help to cope with it.
As much as I wanted to hate him, I couldn’t. It further broke my already broken heart knowing that he’d been in that much pain. And to think that he could’ve died was too much to bear.
“So, Jade, what is your five-year plan?”
I blinked. It took me a minute to return to our conversation. I gave him a brief rundown of my five year business plan and began to feel more like this was an interview than a date.
“And what about personally?”
“Personally?”
“Yes.” He responded without hesitation. “I would like to be married with one child and one on the way.”
“That’s very specific.”
He set his fork down. “I like to have things planned out. I’m thirty-two and this is the decade that I would like to start my family. My twenties were dedicated to building my career. My thirties will be finding my life partner and creating a family. My forties will be centered on raising my children. And once the children are in college, I’d like to retire in my mid-fifties and travel with my wife.”
“Wow.” I wasn’t sure what else to say. I was sure that there were plenty of women that would love to build that life with him, but I wasn’t one of them.
“So where do you see yourself in five years?” he repeated the question. “Married? Kids?”
“I’m not sure. I don’t really believe that you can plan something like that.”
“Of course you can plan it.” He stared at me, incredulous.
What he didn’t know was I certainly hadn’t planned my first pregnancy. In fact I hadn’t even known I was pregnant until I was losing it. It happened a week shy of my sixteenth birthday, and when the doctor told me that my bleeding and abdominal pain was due to a miscarriage it hadn’t seemed real. Hayden and I had always used protection. I told the doctor that as if that would make him change his diagnosis of what was happening to me.
I honestly thought he’d say, “Oh, you use protection. Never mind then. You’re not having a miscarriage. It must be something else.”
Instead he explained to me that condoms were not one hundred percent effective even if they are used correctly. The entire thing still felt like a bad dream. Like a nightmare that I couldn’t wake up from.
My parents never knew what happened. They’d been in Ireland at the time and had left me and Bryson alone since he was eighteen. When I started having bad cramping he was at his girlfriend’s house so I asked Hayden to drive me to the doctor. The only clinic that was open was in Parish Creek, a town about half an hour away. Hayden paid cash and they didn’t ask any questions.
Less than a month later, on his eighteenth birthday, Hayden joined the Army and left for boot camp. I always wondered how different life would be if I hadn’t lost our baby. Would it have been a boy or a girl? Would he or she have Hayden’s eyes or mine? Would they be quiet or outspoken?
The first few years after Hayden left were the worst. I would imagine that our baby would be walking. Talking. Have first teeth. That went on for three or four years, I’d contemplate imaginary milestones. I don’t know what changed but after a certain point I was able to put it out of my mind for the most part. I still wondered but it wasn’t something that I spent hours a day obsessing over.
Then Bella came back to Wishing Well with Sadie. Sadie and my baby would have been the same age. And it started all over again. Would I have had a boy or a girl? Would Hayden and I have stayed together or would we still have broken up? Would I have gone to college? Would I be starting my own business?
Not long after that Bella and Colton reunited and Hayden returned home and my imagination had gone into overdrive. I couldn’t seem to shut it off. I was picturing every scenario that might’ve been.
Maybe I needed to get Hayden’s therapist’s number.
“Can I get you two anything else?” the waitress asked as she approached the table.
I blinked up at her. “No, I’m good, thank you.”
Dennis set his napkin on his plate. “We’ll just take the check.”
She nodded and pulled it out of her apron.
I reached for it at the same time he did.
“I’ve got this,” he said.
“Thank you, but that’s not necessary,” I insisted, although it was refreshing to have someone offer to pick up the tab. I couldn’t remember the last time a man had done that.
After taking care of the bill, we stood and I felt those three wines hit me. Dennis helped me with my coat and offered me his arm as we walked outside where he handed the valet his ticket.
“It was nice meeting you.” I said, as I dug in my purse for my phone.
“You’re not driving, are you?”
“No,” I held up my phone. “Uber.”
“I can give you a ride.” It was obvious that unlike Sam who wanted to take me home to “get to know me better” Dennis was not thinking in those terms. He was offering a ride out of gentlemanly obligation, nothing more. Plus, Wishing Well was a good twenty minute drive from Parish Creek where the restaurant was and he lived.
“Oh no, that’s okay. I’m good,” I assured him.
“Well, it was nice meeting you, Jade. I wish you luck in all your future endeavors.” He gave me one of the nicest blow offs in history as his car pulled up.
It was a Porsche Cayenne.
Yeah. He was going to make someone else very happy one day.
“You too, Dennis.” I waved as he drove away.
Another date in the books.