My lashes lifted to darkness. A window across from me showed night had descended, shadowing the stone buildings and intricate spires across the river. The city lights twinkled off the water like a thousand lamprog, a mean, oversized ladybug with electric wings and sharp teeth. My experience with them had not been pleasant.

The room was small and neat. One bed. Table. Chairs. TV. Hotel room.

A hand ran over my stomach, a body tucking closer to me. I twisted my neck over my shoulder. Lorcan’s head lay on the same pillow as mine, his eyes closed. His long, thick eyelashes fluttered, his cheekbones, jaw, and full bottom lip were like catnip. They made you want to roll around, high and happy in his features.

“Stop watching me, Ken,” his deep voice rumbled, without one lid lifting.

“Shit.” I flinched. “Sorry, I didn’t think you were awake.” I tried to roll over more, but his hands stopped me. Grunting, he pulled me in firmer against him. My frame fit into his perfectly.

“Just resting my eyes,” he mumbled against my hair. “Can’t fully fall asleep, but needed to power up after carrying your ass across the city.”

I fought his hold and flipped around to face him. “I’m sorry.”

His eyes opened, but almost in a glare. “Why are you apologizing?”

“Because... I...” I had no clue what had happened to me earlier.

“What happened on the train?” He put his head on his hand, looking down at me.

“I don’t know.” I had hurt those men. Darkness grew in me. I had felt it several times now, but it had never consolidated into something real or fused into magic that could truly harm. Deserved or not, I had hurt people.

“Try again.”

I blew air out of my mouth. “I had a vision. Those men came in and killed you...” I crushed my lids together briefly, recalling the sickening image of Lorcan’s head rolling around on the seat. “When I came out of it. I was confused, not sure what was reality. But when they walked in…” I waggled my head, still trying to decipher what happened, cold fear harboring in my stomach at what I said. “Something came over me. I mean, it happens a lot, saying stuff I have no control over, but this was different. It felt dark. No. It was dark. What I did and said. I tore into their skin like it was wrapping paper. And that spell to toss them out? I had never said it aloud before, but it rose out like it has been waiting this whole time.”

“Wait. Have you experienced sensations like this before?”

“A couple times now.” I gulped and slowly nodded my head. “It scares me. It feels dark.”

Lorcan pressed his mouth together. “Maybe because your magic was held back for so long, it’s coming out in violent ways. Doesn’t mean the magic is dark. You come from an extremely powerful family. Your magic is stronger than any other Druid’s.”

“But Druids practice light magic. We do good things.” I glanced up, wishing desperately I could believe his theory. “This was heavy and angry. I’m supposed to heal, protect, and help, but I swear in that moment I wanted to hurt them. Badly.”

He adjusted his head on his palm, his green eyes watching me intently.

“The thought of them harming you…” I gulped, dropping my gaze from his. “It also scares me that part of me is capable of such violence and rage. It goes against who I am.” I pinched the pillow between my fingers, my knuckles turning white. “I would have leveled this country. I would have killed and hurt anything in my path.”

Lorcan’s hands came to my face, turning my gaze to his. “That is what I feel on a daily basis for my family. For you?” he growled. “I would flatten the world.”

Tears flooded the back of my lids. Yes, heat rocked my body because of his words, but also comfort. He made me feel normal, like I was okay for feeling what I did. No judgment or concern. Just acceptance. Something I did not give him the other night. Was I so righteous? Judgmental? Could I not accept him for what he was? The good and bad.

“Plus, I will not lie. What you did was so fucking hot.” He tipped his forehead into mine.

“Hot?” I chuckled. “You didn’t mind being pitched into the wall like a beanbag while I tossed two assassins from the train?”

“Mind?” He leaned back, an eyebrow curved. “Remember women in my culture are as strong and powerful as men. We never grew up with this damsel-in-distress idea. Our women are warriors, fighters, and leaders. Not that I don’t enjoy being the dominant one, believe me…but I’m more than secure with being on bottom too.”

Waves of lust crashed into me, stealing my oxygen. All the reasons we shouldn’t be together just a night ago were now hazy. Not so black and white. And being in this bubble with him, away from the world, deflated any reasons I had. Outside this room, the reasons still were stacked against us. Five solid ones.

 

1.)   Jared.

2.)   Ryan.

3.)   Ember.

4.)   My role as Queen.

5.)   Who he was and what he did.

 

No one would ever accept us. Especially Ryan. My friends were my life; I had no choice when it came to them. Lorcan and I were too different. He would eventually move on to someone else. Someone way more his type. And my heart would break, again. Even now, being back with him like this was killing me. I had just gotten to be able to breathe through the day without him. Now I would have to start all over again. Each time more painful.

His fingers moved deeper through my hair; the stifling tension crackled between us. It would be so easy to forget for one night. Drown in the feel of him. I wanted him inside me, to lose myself in his touch. But it would kill me.

I pulled away, sitting up, and turned away from him. My glasses lay folded on the nightstand next to me. I slipped them on, my gaze landing on the clock next to the bed: 11:05 p.m.

“We should get going.” I twisted my hands on my lap, my mind trying to set itself on my decision while my body ached for him, wanting nothing more than him to claim what was his. My need for him was on the cusp of winning. Merely one touch and I would have been done for.

But he didn’t.

“Yeah. We should.” He rolled off the bed and moved to the shower, his movement quick, his words blasé, like he felt nothing of what I did.

Even when he shut the door, my body stood to follow him. But I stopped myself at the door, falling against it, listening to the spray of water.

A part of me, the free Kennedy who had emerged before, intended to walk in and take what she wanted. But that part had gone to the wayside since becoming Queen. My needs were last on the list.

The other Kennedy liked comfort, lists, and safety.

As usual, she won.

 

 

After getting something to eat, Lorcan and I headed to the hotel where we were to meet Lars. We both stood out in grubby jeans, boots, and jackets. Hotel Baur au Lac was for clientele in expensive suits and dresses with high demands.

“What’s funny is you’re the only actual royalty in this place,” Lorcan whispered in my ear after the door attendant scowled at us.

I had to wear dresses and evening gowns for engagements and events, but I could honestly say I preferred this version of Queen. Jeans and boots, the real me.

“May I help you?” a tall, lean man asked from behind the check-in desk in a thick accented voice.

Lorcan pushed me toward the elevators, ignoring the man. He strolled through like he belonged here, while I kept my head bowed deep into my hood.

“Sir?” the man spurted out from the desk, looking to stop us. “You’re not allow—”

Lorcan turned his head slowly to the man. I couldn’t see Lorcan’s face, but I saw the clerk’s. His eyes widened into dinner plates, all color rushing out of his features. His Adam’s apple bobbed, and he took a step back.

Lorcan pushed me into the elevator, his attention on the man as he pushed the penthouse button. Petrified, the man didn’t make another move to come for us, watching the doors close.

I snorted the moment we were alone.

“What?” A grin cracked Lorcan’s mouth.

“You enjoyed that far too much.”

“Hell yeah,” he chuckled.

“And we wonder why there is so much prejudice against fae.” I rubbed my forehead.

“Did I touch him? Did I even threaten that snobby prick?” Lorcan feigned innocence. “No.”

“You don’t need to do any of those things to make them pee their pants.”

Lorcan’s smile turned feral. “Sadly, I can’t seem to inflict the same terror in you... maybe you’d do what I said then.”

“Too bad.” I shrugged, hiding my smile.

“I could inflict something else on you, which might make you obey—” He halted, gaze going cold as he locked down his jaw, stopping the rest of his sentence. We had made it clear it was over, but when we were together, neither one of us seemed able to stop the teasing and innuendos. It was unfair and torturous.

Still, his insinuation prickled warmth into my cheeks and my mind blanked on anything to say back. To my relief the elevator dinged. The doors opened on the top level. Oh thank god.

I stepped out, finding only two doors. Two penthouse suites took up the entire top floor. Lars didn’t give us a room number, but my gut pulled me to the one on the left, feeling strong magic coming from the room.

“You ready?” Lorcan moved next to me. Whether I wanted to accept it or not, a possibility existed Lars wanted me dead. Once the thought was in my mind, it grew tendrils, strangling all my good memories of Lars. What if this was a trap?

I nodded.

Lorcan knocked on the door, and it swung open. An extremely short, chubby man stood on the other side. He had to be a fae dwarf. His dark brown hair was short, but his beard was long and in braids. The sleek suit he wore seemed odd in comparison. If he had opened the door dressed in an outfit from The Lord of Rings, I wouldn’t have batted an eye.

“Your Majesty.” The man bowed before me. I still was getting used to that. A man who was probably older than this country was bowing to me. “I am Demrik, high noble of the dwarfs. Please come in, Majesty.”

“Thank you, Demrik.” I bobbed my head back in respect. “Please call me Kennedy.”

His eyes enlarged, and he shook his head. “No, I couldn’t, my Queen. It would not be proper.” He shut the door behind us.

He was old school, which was good and bad. It came with respect, loyalty, and I knew his word could still be trusted. But nobles of his ilk tended to be so formal and by the rules that nothing ever got done.

Demrik finally looked at my companion. “A d-dark dweller,” Demrik stuttered, stepping back from Lorcan. The beast tilted his head, flashing his teeth.

I thought Demrik was going to faint. “Don’t worry, Demrik. I’m pretty sure he’s housebroken.” I nudged Lorcan with my elbow and heard him chuckle to himself.

Demrik waved us to follow him from the entryway, his eyes still casting back to Lorcan every few steps. Lorcan let out a whisper of a growl. The man jetted to the next room like Superman.

“Stop,” I sighed.

“What? I’m not doing anything.” I shot him a look before stepping into the large living room.

The penthouse was exquisite. Windows comprised one entire wall overlooking the river. The French doors led out onto a huge balcony. Crown molding, sleek lighting, and large pieces of art decorated the room. A gray velvet sofa faced a huge fireplace, the flames flickering in the hearth with a warm welcome. A seating area with silk-covered chairs and another sofa was set out facing the glistening water below on the other side of the room. Double doors on either side of the living space suggested two master suites behind the doors. Goran and Travil stood on either side of the hallway leading to the front door, on guard.

There seemed something familiar about all this, but my attention was quickly taken from the room to the company who were sitting in the seats facing the windows. Two other fae besides Demrik sat on the sofa.

Lars stood the moment I entered, his jaw twitching as he strolled to me.

“Lars,” I greeted him.

He grabbed my elbow, towing me toward the fireplace, Lorcan following.

“Where in the hell have you two been?” His voice was low but sharp. “I tried several times to contact you.”

“We had a little ‘incident,’” Lorcan whispered hoarsely back. “We had to leave everything behind.”

Lars jerked his head to Lorcan.

“What? Someone knows she is here?”

“Yes.” Lorcan slanted his head, his eyes drilling into the King dubiously.

Lars sucked in, his hand dropping from my arm. “And you think I have something to do with it?”

“No,” I replied.

“Maybe,” Lorcan challenged.

“Don’t forget to whom you are talking.” Lars stepped up to Lorcan, his voice even.

“I’m only doing what you hired me to do. Protect her,” Lorcan snapped back. “And if that is questioning everything, even you…I will do it to keep her safe.”

Lars didn’t move or respond. Thirty seconds is an incredibly long time when you wait for a demon to fling a beast across the room with his mind. Instead, Lars inched back, nodding in approval. “I knew I picked the right candidate to guard her.”

“Guys, can we talk about this later?” I tipped my head toward the group staring at us with alarm. “Let’s get to why we are here.”

“I will hear about this incident after.”

“Incidents.” Lorcan stressed the s on the end.

Lars slid one hand in his pants pocket, his lips pinching. “Then I want to hear all. Later. Right now let us attend to business.”

I followed Lars back to the gathering where he introduced me to the other two nobles: Sebille, a leggy, golden blonde fairy of the Hungarian territory, and Brokk, a fair-haired noble from Poland. Both held themselves with power, and I couldn’t help but think insufferable egos. They gushed over me, but I could read in their auras their disgust at having a little Druid girl ruling them, especially one barely older than their shoes, and who was wearing dirty jeans. Demrik was the only genuine one, his aura bright and clear of any hidden agenda.

“We must stop Luuk. He is tearing us apart,” Lars said to the gathered group, who went quiet as though in awe of his power. Or was it fear? I looked at Lars in a new light now that Lorcan had pointed out nefarious possibilities. “It is for the best interest of all our countries to stay together, united under one King and one Queen.”

I watched the auras of both Sebille and Brokk flare green. Greed.

“If we come togeth—”

“What do you guys want?” I interrupted Lars, trying to rally the feeling I was his counterpart. It went against my nature, but I could not in front of anyone appear to be less than his equal.

I felt Lars’s glare on me, but I kept my focus on the two.

“I may be young and new to this, but you forget I am a seer. A very powerful one. I can see your truth.” I pushed my shoulders back. “So let’s get to the point. You are here purely because you want something for yourselves, not because you genuinely want to help our countries stay united.”

Sebille mouth dropped open. “How dare you.”

“I have never been spoken to in this manner,” Brokk spat. “My liege, will you allow such accusations? After all we’ve done for you?”

Their words flew out of their mouths, only showing the truth to my claims. Demrik sat back in the sofa, arms crossed, and a smile growing on his face. Our eyes caught, and he winked at me. It seemed he agreed with me.

“I think this meeting is over.” Sebille stood, swishing her hair off her shoulders. She must have been six feet in her heels, yet she didn’t intimidate me.

“Sit down,” Lars snapped.

Sebille halted, her lashes fluttering.

“Now.” Lars didn’t raise his voice, but the force behind it slammed into me like a truck.

She plopped down on the sofa like an obedient dog.

“You both have been nothing but a nuisance from the day I took the throne.” Lars slid both hands in his pockets, staring at the two blonds. “I, however, dealt with it because of your families and your titles. You ask me if I will permit these accusations. I not only allow them but agree with the Queen. Your Queen. If I don’t see you treat her with more respect, then I will make sure your families never know comfort again. You have grown fat, lazy, spoiled, and greedy. If your King and Queen call upon you, you act. Understand?” Inky black filled Lars’s eyes, his demon threatening at the seams.

All three on the sofa nodded, gulping at the spiking magic in the room.

“Unfortunately, you two hold great power, so I am willing to look away this once. Demrik, I’ve never had to question where your loyalty lies, and I thank you.” He dipped his head at the dwarf. Demrik’s chest rose in pride, his eyes beaming with the compliment. I immediately adored him. There was something genuine about him; I liked his company already. “You three are our greatest hopes in stopping Luuk, shutting this uprising down before it gets any more legs. We need to become a united front. Are we all in agreement here?”

All three nodded their heads.

“Good. Now, let’s have a drink to commemorate our devoted union.” Lars moved to the tray of alcohol set out on a table behind the sofa.

I twisted toward the window. The figures in the glass softly reflected back, like a pond.

“Kennedy?” Lorcan called my name gently, my eyes lifting to the figure standing behind me in the reflection. I sucked in. For one brief moment I saw Jared’s face looking back at me. When I blinked he was gone, but his image left me feeling hollow.

An eerie déjà vu.

Movement coming for the window cascaded horror over me. Oh. No. My mouth opened, and my head whipped back toward the people in the room.

“Run!” I screamed.

But I was too late.

An explosion filled the space with splintering wood and glass, flinging my body through the air. Fire scorched my skin; debris from the room pierced me. I tumbled in the air, my bones crunching as I hit the wall, knocking my senses from me. The last thing I heard was my name screamed in terror.