I take a deep breath as I put a new memory card into my camera. Today I am working on the brochure project for my photography class. Brianna volunteered her and Hurley to sit in as my models. I haven’t tried to use my camera since my appointment last week with Doc. My nerves are shot.
I feel on edge.
Brianna is already working at the library today, so I am going to take pictures of her and Hurley studying on her lunch break. They position themselves across from one another and pretend to be deeply engrossed in their studies. I hold the camera up to my face and look through the lens, and I don’t see Harlan. This is a good thing, but I feel guilty for being able to push thoughts of him to the side so easily these days.
I snap a few shots of just the two of them. Then I snap a few shots of the head librarian offering them help as well. Some of these I will have to give Brianna copies of, her and Hurley really do make a cute couple. I am walking around the library on my own taking photographs of the beautiful ceilings and stained glass windows.
I am snapping the pictures so quickly that I almost missed him. I scroll back through the pictures I have just taken on my memory card and I have caught a figure in the far corner of the second floor of the library. Someone is definitely watching me, and I have inkling that it isn’t Harlan, but it is a man.
*—*
I am excited to have a week off from classes for the holiday and I am looking forward to my Gram’s cooking. Brianna has dinner with her parents, so she is coming to my Gram’s house afterwards. That just leaves Cutter, Hurley, Gram and me to eat together. Or so I thought, until Dr. Peters shows his face.
“Alex, can you help me and Gram with something in the kitchen?” I give him an or else look that lets him know I mean NOW! As soon as he enters the kitchen I make it clear to him that today he is here as a guest, he is not my Doctor. I do not want my friends to know who he is. He agrees to keep his conversation social. I also warn Gram while I am at it. Today I just want to be a normal teenage girl enjoying the holiday with her friends and family.
Dr. Peters or shall I say Alex joins Hurley and Cutter in the TV room to watch football. Gram has me helping her finish up with dinner. She has put me in charge of making the cherry cheese pie. I told her that we should be making two, it is always the first dessert to disappear.
I clear a spot on the prep table. Gram has a kitchen that would make Paula Deen wet herself. It has a down-home feel but with state of the art appliances. I think my favorite part of the whole room is the sink. It is a deep farmhouse sink. I bet I could almost fit my butt in it to wash.
I love the sink because it looks out to the flower garden. The view from it is so beautiful on spring mornings. Her cabinets are painted cotton candy blue. The white curtains offset a beautiful marble countertop. It is the perfect kitchen for cooking from scratch.
I get a couple of fresh lemons from the refrigerator. Gram won’t stand for using that artificial stuff. I add one half cup of fresh squeezed lemon juice to my bowl. Next is the softened cream cheese and a drop of vanilla extract. Finally, I add the sweetened milk and beat it with the mixer until it is smooth and creamy.
I pour the filling over the crust and place it inside the refrigerator to set. I don’t add the cherries until it is ready to be served, but I keep them chilled as well. My favorite part is licking the filling from the spindles.
Gram appears to have everything else under control. I escape to my old room for a moment to change my shirt. Taking off my t-shirt, I am standing at my closet in my black pencil skirt and black lace bra deciding what sweater I want to wear. When suddenly I am grabbed from behind, I know it is Cutter. He didn’t shave this morning and I can feel his light stubble grazing against my shoulder.
“So, this is where you are hiding, your Gram sent me to find you. She says dinner is almost ready. She recruited Hurley to help her set the table. Brianna better watch out, I saw those two making eyes at each other.” He turns me around to face him as he peppers kisses down my neck.
“Just ewww, my Gram and Hurley is not an attractive thought. It is a major turn off.” I roll my eyes with disgust and walk back towards my closet. As I am taking my charcoal grey wrap style sweater from the hanger, Cutter grabs me again, this time pinning me down on the bed.
Torturous kisses rain across my exposed chest. I can’t help but giggle as his stubble rubs across my sensitive skin. It is as if each tiny hair is a feather strategically placed to tickle the piss out of me. “Stop, my Gram is going to hear us!”
This just sends him into overdrive. “Doesn’t the thought of getting caught excite you, Bella?” he asks rubbing his chin over my now exposed nipples. His hand slides up my thigh, inching closer to the heart of my desire.
“Actually, the thought of my Gram walking in here right now during this moment terrifies me. She keeps a rifle loaded in the hall closet.”
“Buzz kill,” he murmurs, giving me one last kiss before leaving me writhing on my old bed.
I am half tempted to text him to come back in here and finish what he started. I am supposed to spend the night with Gram tonight. I just may have to revert to my high school ways and sneak Cutter back in through my window tonight.
I dress quickly, smooth out my appearance, and wait a few extra minutes. I can’t go back in there with my cheeks flushed. Gram will know we were messing around.
I make my way back into the dining room to find Brianna has arrived and everyone is waiting for me to take my seat.
Gram gives me a knowing smirk. “Bella, next time you and Cutter mess around in my house he might want to wipe your smudged lipstick from his face. Now, Cutter, I would be ever delighted if you would lead us in saying Grace.”
My face must be ten shades of crimson. Brianna and Hurley let out snickers. I look at Cutter and he doesn’t seem the least bit embarrassed. In fact, he winks at me, in front of everyone, no less. Alex clears his throat clearly not amused by all our antics.
“Let us bow our heads in prayer. Heavenly Father, we just want to take a few moments to tell you how thankful we are to be here today in one another’s company and in good health. Thank you, Father, for blessing us with this plentiful meal prepared by Mrs. Rose. Amen.”
We all raise our heads and start passing around the serving dishes. Dr. Peters keeps the conversation light, but I can tell he is studying each one of my friends and it pisses me off. He makes sure to ask each of them something of their plans after college and something about their families. I know he knows who Brianna is, but he plays dumb. I am not sure if it is for my sake or so that the guys don’t feel uncomfortable by his undercover interrogation. I especially don’t like all the extra attention he is paying to Cutter. He is acting like a father would, and he is not my father. I don’t have one of those.
Some days I think it would be nice to have had one—a protector, someone to tell you boys were bad news, to take me to those father/daughter dances.
But all I can really think about is getting rid of everyone, so I can steal Cutter away to myself and have my way with him.
Get your mind out of the gutter Bella Rose, I chastise myself mentally.
I am like dog in heat today.
I shake my dirty thoughts from my mind. If people could read my mind, they would be one of two things, extremely turned on or deeply disturbed.
It makes me happy to see my Gram looking so pleased. It has been quite a few years since her house was this full on a holiday.
I wonder if she used to keep people away to keep me from learning the secrets she was hiding. Because everyone else would know that there was no Robert Rose. The lie still stings but I am trying to let it go. Sometimes you forgive, not for the sake of the person who has wronged you, but for your own sanity. And sometimes you have to forgive people even if they aren’t sorry.
Brianna helps me clear the table and load the dishes into the dishwasher. “Hurley and I are going to head out in a few.” she raises her eyebrows suggestively at me. “I am hoping he is going to finally ask me out, officially. He is taking me to meet his parents,” she squeals in my ear. She taps her feet and twirls me, forcing me to join in on her happy dance.
I wonder how Cutter is feeling, not being with his family today. If it is bothering him, he is doing a great job masking his hurt.
Alex says his goodbyes as well. He shakes Cutter’s hand and tells him he hopes he will see him around. I don’t miss the double meaning behind his words. I offer to carry out the leftovers my Gram has loaded him down with out to his vehicle. I really just want to know what his problem with Cutter is.
We get down the street to where he is parked and far enough from the house that I know no one can hear. “What was that back there? Why are you so interested in Cutter?”
“Bella, I am unsure what you mean. I am just taking an interest in the people you spend a lot of time with. Do you know that most victims are harmed by someone that they know? I am just taking necessary precautions, in case someone is watching you or doing these things to you.”
“Argh!” Is all I can muster to say. I place the dishes securely in his backseat and walk away without another word. Does he really suspect my friends, or even worse Cutter? So now not only does he act fatherly, he is playing detective too. Incredible. I will never understand the male sex.
I walk back into the house to find Gram and Cutter sitting on the couch together looking at my naked baby pictures. “Gram, really, are the pictures necessary?”
“Oh hush, child, there is nothing wrong with a naked baby. But I am going to go take a nap. I am stuffed and ready to pass out. You and Cutter here.” she pats his knee. “You two enjoy yourselves, but not too much.” She points her finger at me like I am the one Cutter should be watching out for.
He’s the instigator. I smirk to myself.
He was the one trying to get me to do dirty things with him earlier. Not the other way around. He has Gram fooled with his good boy act. But I know better. I know he is a wicked pervert who wants to keep me naked, but I’m not complaining. Cutter Dawson could easily turn me into his sex slave.
“I prefer to see the older you naked myself,” he whispers seductively in my ear, proceeding to trace the shell of my ear with that magic tongue, making me hot in all the right places.
Damn him and his magical seducing tongue.