#WTFisthisWTFery
THE NEXT MORNING, there’s a new energy in the Alpha Mail offices. Everyone is buzzing about the successful pitch and our impending growth.
Dane, the darkest and broodiest of the alphas on my staff, growls at me as we pass each other in the hallway.
“I hope a decent coffeemaker is part of the office remodel.” He narrows his eyes in a glare as he raises his stainless mug in the air. “This shit tastes like sewage.”
“Doesn’t all shit taste like sewage?” I quip.
He’s not amused. But at least he keeps his commentary about the old coffeemaker to himself and walks on.
Why women like talking to a guy who seems perennially pissed off is beyond me, but we have clients who love Dane. He’s a bartender by night, and he’s also a full-time student in business school. Maybe he’s always pissed because he’s so tired.
When I walk into my office, there’s an enormous, exotic-looking vase of flowers on my desk. Bright oranges and pinks are mixed with tropical greenery. I furrow my brow and reach for the white card tucked beneath the vase.
I open it and read the neat, handwritten message.
Congratulations on your successful pitch. I’m very much looking forward to working with you.
—Ben Durant
My brows shoot up in surprise. I look at the flowers again, and then read the words on the notecard one more time.
Is this just a professional courtesy, or something more? I hope it’s the former, because I don’t need any personal feelings getting in the way of a relationship with an investor. Even one who looks like Ben Durant.
Which one was he, anyway? He and his brother look so much alike, I don’t know how anyone can tell them apart. I decide it doesn’t matter, move the flowers over to a table in my office, and sit down at my desk.
Jane walks in then, nearly silent as she carries a cup of coffee to my desk and sets it down. I eye the Starbucks cup as I slide on my reading glasses.
“How’s our office coffeemaker?” I ask her.
She opens her mouth to respond but closes it again, seemingly lost for words. I smile.
“Can you pick up a new one today?”
“Sure. I would have mentioned it, but we had a freeze on expenses, so . . .”
“No, I understand. I’m going to relax that now that our investment came through.”
I take a sip of the Pike Place that’s my lifeblood. I pay for my Starbucks fixes out of my personal expense account, but I still want to provide good coffee for the staff here.
“These are gorgeous.” Jane walks over to the bouquet of flowers and brushes her fingertips across the petals of an orange flower. “It’s not your birthday, though. Some other occasion?”
She’s fishing. If there’s office gossip, she always wants to be the first to know. And since it’s common knowledge that I haven’t been on a date in a long time, I can see the wheels turning in her mind. She thinks I’ve got a man, and she wants to tell the entire office.
I should tell her the truth—that they’re just from a colleague. But I kind of like to make her suffer.
“Hmm?” I feign distraction, looking up from my computer. “Oh, not really.”
“Was there a card? Or are they from a secret admirer?”
“There was a card.”
“Mmm.” She leans, searching to see if it’s tucked into the blooms.
Too bad for her it’s on my desk.
“Let’s cater in lunch for everyone today,” I say.
“I’ll get right on it.” With a new task to focus on, Jane turns away from the flowers and heads for the door. “Where would you like me to order from?”
I consider. “How about that deli Gretchen’s brother owns? Their food is always good.”
“You’ve got it.”
She leaves my office, and I click on the icon to open my email. It takes me almost half an hour to respond to the messages of congratulations on yesterday and interest from investors. There are even messages from investors who weren’t here yesterday but heard about it from people who were.
It feels amazing to have so many people eager to sink money into Alpha Mail. Yesterday did go very well, but that was the culmination of years of hard work. And it’s not over. The hardest work is likely ahead, as I maximize every dollar and grow the business as wisely as I can.
There’s only one message remaining, and it’s from an address I don’t recognize.
From: [email protected]
Re: newspaper article
Ms. Mills,
Just wanted to tell you I enjoyed the article in the Sun about your business. You’re clearly a driven woman, and I have no doubt Alpha Mail will continue to thrive under your leadership.
However, you’ve got a few things to learn about the nature of a strong man. You said in the article that you’ve dated alphas before, but trust me—you haven’t.
Roll your eyes all you want. I can help you up the game at your business if you’re willing to listen.
Awaiting your response.
I furrow my brow, lean back in my chair, and then immediately lean forward to read the unsigned message again. Yep, it’s still obnoxious. I shake my head and write back a quick response.
From: [email protected]
Re: newspaper article
Thanks for your offer, but your advice isn’t needed.
Sienna Mills
I give the anonymous emailer credit for one thing and one thing only. I did roll my eyes as I read his message. I don’t claim to be perfect; I built my business through hard work and trial and error. But if there’s something I am an expert in, it’s men who think they know it all.
Time and again, I ran into men like that one. They drank in my body with their eyes and then told me I’d be begging them to do all sorts of filthy things to me in no time flat. Told me they knew my body better than I did. Flexed their muscles and said they wanted to own me. I was actually told not to “worry my pretty little head” once.
There’s nothing sexy about being treated like a possession. Having a man lose his shit because another man looked at me isn’t hot, it’s embarrassing.
Carmen and I are both living proof that women really can do it all on our own. Jack’s father, Danny, promised he’d raise their child by Carmen’s side and then ditched out right after his birth. And I built my business on my own, with no help from anyone I wasn’t paying to work for me.
We both may be perennially exhausted, but it’s been years since either of us had a serious relationship, and neither of us wants one. Our emotional support comes from each other.
I’ve got a best friend I can rely on and a top-of-the-line vibrator I can also rely on. That’s my definition of fulfillment.
The sweet scent of the nearby flowers drifts over to my desk, and I feel a pang of guilt for dismissing Ben’s kind gesture so quickly.
I type out a quick email to him.
Ben,
Thanks for the lovely flowers. That was so thoughtful of you. I’m also looking forward to moving Alpha Mail forward in partnership with the investors.
Best,
Sienna
There. I thanked him without making it sound like I’m interested in anything more than a business relationship.
Been there, done that. And if I had a T-shirt, it would say “Over it.”
I open an internet browser to start looking for a local interior designer to redecorate Jack’s bedroom. He loves Star Wars, and I want to surprise him with a makeover.
What drives me these days, other than growing Alpha Mail, is anything that makes Jack smile. I can see why Carmen has lost herself in her son—that gap-toothed grin of his makes me warmer inside than anything ever has.
This is unconditional love. It fuels me and guts me at the same time. Lifts me high into the air and then drops me to the cold, hard ground. Loving Jack is the easiest thing I’ve ever done, but one day, it’s going to break my heart into a million pieces.
Not today, though. Today, I’ll keep moving forward, and I’ll see the joy around me, just like Jack does.