NINE

 

His mother could have frozen Dane out without even trying, Taylor knew that very well. She could have said, and done, the same things, and still made it very clear that Dane wasn’t welcome. It was even what Dane, tensed up and nervous beside him, clearly expected, but Taylor knew better.

That wasn’t who his mother was. She might be cautious, but she wasn’t cruel, and slowly, Taylor watched as Dane and his mother thawed around each other. By the time they sat down to dinner, Dane was chattering away like he was an old friend of the family, and it was then that Taylor had a chance to think about what was happening here.

And that’s when he got really scared, because it was like, the whole time, there had been a hole at their table in the shape of Dane. Like, now that he was there, the little family was complete, which was, of course, absolutely the last thought that Taylor needed to have.

It should have been perfect, maybe, he thought, as he and Dane retired to the kitchen, Dane having volunteered them to do the dinner dishes. Taylor could never be with anyone who wasn’t acceptable to his family, and Dane, demonstrably, was. But Taylor had been so cautious for so long, and when he looked at it with any kind of actual scrutiny, he knew the score.

Dane was leaving. Dane would always be leaving. Was Taylor supposed to have a relationship that took place only once a year, for a week at a time? What about if this fair didn’t come through town again? Would that be how they broke up?

No, it was impossible. No matter how perfect it was to do dishes together and then to play a board game with the whole family, which Danica, crowing with delight, easily won. Danica went up to bed since it was a school night, and Taylor’s mom followed close behind, and then Taylor was alone with Dane.

“Does she know?” Dane asked, reaching over and taking Taylor’s hand in his own. Neither of them had been touching the other very much, but now that everyone was gone, Taylor could relax, just a little.

“About us?” Taylor tilted his head to the side as he laced his fingers into Dane’s. Us. That one little word, which could mean so much, or so little. He liked the way that it sounded, though. Us. Him and Dane, together. It was seductive, and all the more dangerous for that.

“Yeah, about us, but also about you.” Dane tugged Taylor close, and all at once, the rigid control that Taylor had held over himself all day relaxed, and he softly groaned as he leaned against Dane’s strong arm. The scent of him was familiar now, and it rose around him so that he could breathe it in deep.

“You mean, does she know that I’m gay?” Taylor asked, his voice almost defiant. They weren’t words that he was used to saying out loud. Dane arched an eyebrow at his vehemence but seemed to content himself with a simple nod, which made a lot of the defiance go out of his voice. “I’ve never told her, but I have the feeling that she might know now.”

And it was true. He had seen his mother giving him some deeply thoughtful looks, and she had probably put together enough pieces of the puzzle that, if he did tell her, she wouldn’t be shocked.

Dane nodded but was shifting restlessly around, looking over their house with a faintly discontent look on his face. Was he on edge because he was trapped inside? He probably wasn’t very used to that, Taylor realized, and he smiled sadly to himself as he rose to his feet, tugging Dane up with him.

That was the huge, fatal difference between them, that Dane would feel uncomfortable in a house while Taylor didn’t have the power to leave it. Or so it often felt, when Taylor thought of all his responsibilities which were holding him here.

“Come outside with me?” Taylor coaxed. The house was small, but the backyard was big, and it was a warm night, at least as far as Taylor was concerned. The sky was, for once, free of clouds, though the nonstop autumn rain was doubtless on its way.

Dane smiled a little and joined him, and, still hand in hand, they walked out the back door into the yard. The moon had just risen, and Taylor smiled a little as Dane tugged him over to the large swing set, one big enough for two adults to curl up on the padded seat and be cozy but not cramped.

Dane’s long legs rocked them as Taylor rested his head against him once more. This time, Dane wrapped an arm around him, hugging him against his side as they rocked slowly, back and forth. There was a slight, autumnal chill to the air, but Dane radiated enough warmth that Taylor didn’t feel it.

“She liked you,” Taylor finally murmured, once he realized that Dane was sort of off in his own world. “You pretty much charmed the pants off of her, you know that?” And his mom, he knew, was a friendly, warm, open woman, but even so, she rarely took to anyone quite as much as she had to Dane.

“There’s only one Lachlan family member that I wanna charm the pants off of,” Dane murmured, his voice a seductive, deep growl, and Taylor smiled as he closed his eyes and let the welcome surge of heat, of desire, race through his body, making his inner core clench. There was a promise there, and he basked in that, and in the memory of what it had been like the last time Dane had been buried inside of him.

Soon enough, they would find a place to go have sex, Taylor knew it. But there was no rush, not right at the moment.

“So catch me up. What’s been going on with you? I half expected to come back and find that you had a boyfriend,” Dane probed, not particularly subtly, and Taylor smiled as he tucked his legs up onto the swing and leaned more firmly, more fully, on Dane.

“No. No boyfriend,” he assured Dane first of all. “And you’re not sneaky, by the way. I saw what you did there.” He raised his eyes and grinned at the other man, who had the grace to at least look a little embarrassed by his obvious tactic. “I’m still here. Mom got a different job, and she’s home evenings now, which is nice. I’m still helping her take care of Danica.”

Dane frowned thoughtfully, and those big dark eyes of his slightly narrowed as he looked down at Taylor.

“Danica. How’s she doing?” Dane asked, and Taylor thought that Dane seemed to care. And, since Danica was, by far, the most important thing in Taylor’s life, he couldn’t help but fall for Dane just a little bit more for the question.

“There have been some hopeful signs,” Taylor admitted slowly. “The doctors say that she has a pretty good chance of beating this thing. But then …” His voice trailed off, and then he shook his head and sighed softly.

“What is it?” Dane probed, though Taylor knew very well that he didn’t have to, and he was sort of ridiculously grateful that Dane cared enough to ask.

“It’s just, when Danica’s better, I guess I have to figure out what to do with my life,” he admitted, far more openly than he had to anyone, except in his own mind. Even then, he hadn’t put it into clear words, not like he was now. “Before she got sick, I was going to go to school, you know? I had just graduated from high school, had even gotten into a few different universities.”

Dane nodded, and Taylor rested his head down again, the air thick with the things that he had said. He felt awkward about it, but in a way, it was very freeing to be around Dane. Since he knew very well that the man would be leaving soon, he could say, and do, things that he wouldn’t have to or with anyone else. That had been a basis for their strange relationship from the beginning.

“I thought I’d go to school once,” Dane spoke slowly, as though Taylor’s confidences were dragging the words out of him, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to be saying them at all. Taylor listened closely, eager for any hints about this enigmatic man. “Engineering. But that didn’t work out.”

It was maddening. Just enough to whet his appetite. It wasn’t until Dane gave him that sliver that Taylor realized just how curious he had been. He hadn’t let himself think about it much, but he was.

“Why didn’t it work out?” Taylor finally prompted, hoping that he wasn’t pushing anything too far, but then, Dane had brought it up in the first place, hadn’t he? He was perfectly capable of keeping his own counsel, Dane was, and if he had spoken at all, he must have been at least open to talking about it.

“I got kicked out of my house. Had to work,” Dane started, and then he sighed and shook his head, which Taylor, his head on Dane’s chest, felt, rather than saw. “Guess it’s my own fault for being gay.”

Taylor’s eyes widened, and he raised his head, looking into Dane’s slightly defiant face, hearing the bitterness in his words. He couldn’t even hold back a soft gasp, because in all of his worries about his own sexuality, for all of his concern that he would disappoint his poor mother too much, he had never, not in a million years, been worried that she would kick him out.

It was unthinkable, and he stayed silent, but shifted onto Dane’s lap and kissed him gently. His throat was choked up, and he couldn’t seem to make himself speak, but he showed Dane, he hoped, without needing words, how he felt about that.

Dane’s parents had kicked their own son out of their house for being gay? Somehow, that made a lot of the things that he knew about Dane make more sense. In a moment of intolerance, Dane had been shoved out into the world, had had to make his own way. No wonder he didn’t stop running.

“I bet you’d be a good engineer,” Taylor finally whispered, when the lump in his throat had been swallowed down enough that he could say anything at all.

“Nah. That ship’s sailed. School ain’t for me,” Dane said, and Taylor frowned because there was a resignation in that voice, but also sadness. Dane had given up, rather than changed his mind about going to school, and that struck him as almost unbearably depressing. “But you, darlin’, you could be good at anything you want. You should go to school if you get a chance.”

Taylor straddled the bigger man, gazing into his eyes, and he knew then that there had been a deeper interaction between their souls, their hearts, a sort of communion that even the sex hadn’t created. Just by talking, sharing some of themselves, Taylor felt closer to Dane than ever.

And that was dangerous—horribly, horribly dangerous—because nothing had changed. Dane was leaving and had never given any indication that he would do anything else. Dane would keep running, keep going from town to town, keep searching for something which Taylor had no idea if he would ever find. Something that he wasn’t sure that Dane even knew what it was.

They kissed again, their bodies fitting together, and, for the first time, Taylor let himself think it. They fit together like they belonged together, the slow rocking of the swing encouraging light, sweet, soft movement between them.

Dane was hard, and so was Taylor, and at that moment, it felt like it was just them, the only two people in the whole world. The lights of the houses around them were dark, and no one, Taylor realized, could see them.

“I want you,” Taylor whispered, and he deliberately rubbed his ass right against Dane’s cock, which he could feel was growing, hardening by the second.

“We can go inside …” Dane started, and Taylor shook his head and bit lightly at Dane’s full lower lip, nibbling on it gently.

“No. I’ve waited for a year to have you,” he whispered and shifted up just enough that he could slip open Dane’s pants and slip his fingers into his boxers. He found Dane already fully erect for him, and he stroked him briefly before easing his cock out of his boxers, his whole body tight and hot and aching with excitement.

Dane made him feel like he could do things that he never had before, and this definitely counted.

“Someone might see,” Dane protested, but he wasn’t stopping Taylor, either. And Taylor could tell that his boldness excited Dane because he could feel the heat of his precome as it oozed out of him, coating the head of his cock.

“No one will see. It’s dark. We might as well be the only two people in the world right now.” Taylor shifted back just a second so that he could enjoy the deeply erotic sight of that thick, hard cock, jutting up away from Dane’s body, swollen and shimmering with his arousal in the moonlight. So much of their relationship had taken place at night, which seemed somehow appropriate.

He had taken to carrying a condom around with him since Dane had come back, just because he had known, the moment that he got the opportunity, that he was going to need him. He slid it out of his pocket and carefully tore the package open. His hands shook as he rolled the latex sheath over Dane’s impressive cock, all the way to the base.

“Fuck, Taylor, are you sure …” Dane started, but Taylor stripped and then shifted up onto his lap again, kissing him firmly to shut him up. It was funny to him that Dane, the bad boy, the daring one, was nervous about this, but for Taylor, it felt completely right. Then again, he knew this small town, and he knew that the chances of anyone seeing them were slim to none, or else he would never have risked it.

“I’m sure,” he murmured against Dane’s lips and then started to press his hips down. He felt the brush of the head against his tight ass, felt it as the ring of muscle started to yield, to open up, and to accept Dane inside of him once more.

It had only been once, and it had been a year ago, but Taylor’s body remembered. He let himself breathe slowly and evenly, remembering how, once he’d relaxed, he could take him in far more easily. But the slight sting, the stretch, and the increasing sense of fullness, he remembered all of that.

They kissed, both of them moaning into it, keeping it all relatively silent. Dane’s long legs flexed, and the swing swayed a little with the movement, rocking gently and slowly as Dane slid inside of him.

There had been lube on the condom, and it was a good thing because Taylor had forgotten just how big and thick Dane was. But just like last time, he took it. His body clenched around Dane, welcoming him in, and Taylor just waited for the moment when …

There.

Dane’s cockhead brushed against Taylor’s prostate, and just as Taylor had known would happen, his whole body instinctively relaxed and even started to strain for more. He whimpered softly, head shifting down to rest on Dane’s shoulders, his knees on either side of the other man’s hips as he slowly rode him.

Taylor’s arms wrapped around Dane’s body, grateful for how sturdy he was, how big and strong and solid. He clung to him, not afraid of hurting him, as he rocked on him and the movements of the swing added just an intriguing little hint of uncertainty to the whole experience.

“Dane,” Taylor whispered, feeling sweat starting to build on his brow as he rode the handsome man, his body no longer resisting at all. The slight sting, the pressure, had turned to lust, to a pure desire for more, to be closer, to be filled as much as he could be. “Dane, it’s so good.”

Dane gave the sexiest little growl that Taylor had ever heard, and then Taylor felt the clutch of big, strong hands, each one large enough that when Dane grabbed his ass, each cheek was completely covered. Dane soon had complete control of his body.

“Stop teasing and ride me,” Dane demanded, and Taylor pulled back, searching Dane’s face and then grinning at him. He saw his desperation, and it was good to know that he wasn’t the only one who felt that way but he had to admit, he was intrigued by the way Dane was looking at him.

“Make me,” he teased, and, just as he had hoped, Dane’s grip tightened. Taylor had wanted to feel all of his strength, and he thought that he did then as Dane thrust up, using that grip on Taylor’s ass to shove deep, to arrange his body as he liked, to fuck up into him in a way that Taylor couldn’t have stopped, or controlled, if he wanted to. He might be on top, but he was here for Dane’s pleasure at that moment.

And for his own. Being used, being controlled, was just as perfect as he had thought it was, and he clung to Dane and just hung on for the ride. His body tensed up, and without much warning at all, the pleasure rolled through him all at once. He bit desperately at Dane’s neck, leaving a little mark, a bruise, on the tender skin, just to stifle his cries of urgent need, finally satisfied as nothing else could.

Which meant he was in trouble because the only man who could give him this was leaving. But he had it right now, he reminded himself, and he clung to Dane as Dane spilled inside of him with a low growl.

At that moment, they were together, and Taylor was just going to have to get as much of this as he could in the time that he did have Dane with him.