Chapter 2 – Gemma
Almost four and a half hours later, Caston was born into the world and though not everyone was there, I don’t think anyone could have been happier. When I held the small baby in my arms, I was overtaken by emotions. I had never really experienced such a feeling before and when I looked at the love in Leanna’s eyes, I felt a moment of jealousy. This is what I wanted and I hadn’t even known it. I wanted a child of my own and the love that transpired between the two.
“Well Gemma. I don’t think I have ever seen you cry before.”
Handing her baby back to her I smiled. “I have never felt so much love in a room. He is going to be so loved and happy Leanna. My brother is going to fall in love in a second.”
She smiled and though he wasn’t there and that bothered her, how could she be upset. There was no way to be and I knew then that it was all going to be okay. As I walked out of the room, mom stopped me and gave me a hug.
“They are a miracle, aren’t they?”
I nodded. It was the only thing that could be said. “Yes they are. He is so precious and looks like dad in a way.”
Elna smiled and nodded her head with her own tears in her eyes. She was more emotional, so it seemed more acceptable. “I wish he was here to see the first grandkid.”
“He is mom. He is here with us all the time.”
She wanted to believe it. I could see it in her eyes. “I just wish he could be here one last time to see how well you have all turned out.”
Now I felt myself getting all teary-eyed. She was the only person that could make me so emotional. As the only daughter with five brothers, there was never a time for emotions, but in that moment I couldn’t stop myself. I wanted to believe that our father was there with us, but it was all of it that made me feel so raw inside.
“I wish that too.”
“I wish that you would find your soul mate as well, Gemma. You have much to offer a man and you would be such a good mother.”
I just nodded and wiped my eyes. I had never wanted the same things that she did, but with all of the love going around on that day and the months prior, I almost wished the same thing. If Paul and Marcel could find love after all that time, why couldn’t I?”
“Well mom I am going to get home before it gets too late.”
“Alright, Gemma. Make sure you call me when you get home so that I know you are okay.”
I told her I would. “Are you going back to the city tonight or are you staying at the ranch?”
“I will be staying with Leanna when she gets out if your brother doesn’t come back by then.”
“Oh he will be here. You should stay at the ranch. Did you hear about Davina?”
Her face started to grin and I knew that she had. It had been her dying wish that all of her kids found happiness and got married. I knew that I was one that she worried about, but until that day, I wasn’t sure that I really wanted it. But then I saw Caston and he changed my mind. The way that Leanna looked at her son was a love that I had never experienced and it was hard not to want it.
“I did hear about her being pregnant. I know that Marcel is over the moon about it. Who would have thought that he would ever be a father?”
Elna had known. She had that look of slight smugness. She knew that she had planted the seed in all of us. That was her purpose and it was never hard to see what she really wanted in it all. She wanted us to be happy.
“I love you mom. I am going to get out of here. I will stop by the ranch tomorrow if you are going to be there.”
“What about work?”
I shrugged. I never was too worried about my job. It wasn’t something that I really wanted to do. “The boss doesn’t care. I have all of my work done on time and I have been working off location for a while. I don’t have to be there to fix their books.”
Elna just sighed at me. She was the type of woman that always had to work, but to me, I still hadn’t found my calling yet. There was no passion in what I did. I knew then that I needed to find that thing that made me happy like it did her. I was starting to wonder if maybe a family life was what I really wanted. It wasn’t like I could just go to the store and get a husband, though, especially not one that was to be my soul mate. It just didn’t happen like that, I was sure of it.
I gave her a kiss on her cheek and promised to see her the next day. It had been a long one for me and as I left the hospital, I realized then that it was already dark outside. I had been there all day and I was exhausted. I had a moment, a second really that I thought about calling my ex and seeing if he wanted to come over, but I resisted. It was not to be and Henry was not the one for me. He never had been and going back would just be taking a step forward.
When I got home to the small house on the other side of town, I gave my cat a pat on the head before I took my shoes off and headed towards the shower. All I could think about was Leanna and Caston and what I wanted in my life. It was one of those moments where I just knew that I had to change things. I didn’t know if it would be for the best, but some parts of my life needed it. Fighting back the urge to call Henry again, not wanting to be alone, I finally lay down and spent an hour or more, thinking about how my life had turned out. I was almost thirty and the clock that we all heard about was ticking loudly in the quiet room.
***
The alarm woke me up and as my hand searched for the source of the pain in my head, I knew that it was going to be another long day. I had been dreaming about a dark-haired man with bright green eyes and a young baby boy that I knew in my heart was to be mine.
As I sat there thinking about it all and what I would do that day, I knew that I wanted to do something different. While I thought about going to the city and seeing an old friend, I remembered that I had promised mom that I would go and see her. So I got dressed and called into work and told them that I wasn’t going to be in today. I didn’t give a reason and I felt like I didn’t have to.
After getting dressed, I made my way to the ranch to see everyone. There was still a bit of buzz in the air when I got there. My brother Marcus was supposed to be in later that day after finally finding transport and I was just excited to see him. He was always my favorite brother since we were closest in age and I couldn’t help but smile when I thought about how he was going to feel when it was all said and done and he had met Caston. The little blue-eyed boy was going to steal his heart as he had stolen mine. I was sure of it.