Chapter 8

“He’s really cute, and he likes you—why won’t you dance with the guy?” Elsa asked as Rose started to drink the vodka at their table.

“I’m just not that into him.”

“You just like guys that you can totally control,” Kimberly added.

“Pretty much. I don’t want anything heavy, and I want someone fun.”

“That Bronx guy seems pretty fun. I mean he was zip lining last weekend, and he’s right there with you at your office. Seems like the perfect guy to have a little fun with.”

“I’m not into him,” Rose said more firmly.

“Whatever, he’s nice. Oh, and he’s coming over again.”

Rose quickly turned around to see Bronx making a V line for her. The determination in his eyes was almost comical as he looked right at her and strode quickly. Rose tried not to laugh as he made his way right up to her, grabbed her by the hands and pulled her out onto the dance floor.

“If it’s forceful that you like, then I’ll give it to you,” Bronx said.

Bronx wasn’t the kind of guy who would normally demand a woman’s attention, but then again, normally women wanted his attention and didn’t push him away like Rose had been doing. Bronx was used to women practically throwing themselves at him, and the fact that Rose refused to be thrown off by his charm was driving him crazy. He needed her again, and he wasn’t going to stop until he had her in his bed or she let him come back to her bed again.

Rose just laughed and went out with him to the dance floor. It wasn’t worth arguing with him in front of everyone. She could stand another dance, and Bronx couldn’t do that much damage if they were out on the dance floor with everyone watching them.

Bronx stood around six feet tall, and Rose could remember his muscular build very distinctly. In fact, when she was that close to him, Rose felt a lot of the sexual attraction which had brought them together only a week before. It felt good. Bronx felt a little comfortable to her now, and that feeling was something unusual, yet nice to her.

He smelled delicious too, much better than Mike smelled. She breathed him in and tried not to close her eyes as the delicious smell of his cologne filled her nostrils. Bronx was cute, she wasn’t going to deny that, but she wanted a fuck buddy and not a boyfriend; she wasn’t sure Bronx understood that just yet.

“Your body moves like you know your way around a dance floor,” Bronx said as he pulled her close to him.

His mouth was only inches away from her ear, and the gentle sound of his voice had her body tingling with desire. Rose felt the built up of her addiction as his hands slid down to her ass and then back up again where he rested just at the base of her back. He wanted her. She felt it in his touch. She saw it in the way he was looking at her. Rose knew she was only moments away from giving in and letting Bronx come home with her again.

The feeling of being wanted, being desired, was what drove Rose to have a man. She could forget all the loss and pain in her life when there was a man in front of her that desired her so much. It was unstoppable once she felt it.

There was just something so powerful about another human being wanting her. She felt the passion from Bronx in that moment, and her whole body reacted with desire. Being wanted felt good. It made her feel like she was powerful and in control of her life when she knew that she really wasn’t powerful or in control at all.

“I used to dance as a girl. I love dancing.”

“Let me take you home,” Bronx begged. “Or I’ll go home with you.”

Rose just smiled and tucked herself in close to him. She wasn’t ready to step away from him, and she wasn’t going to tell him he could come home with her. She just wanted to stay in that spot with his arms around her for a little longer. Bronx certainly wasn’t a man she would have thought she would want to have a second time, but there she was thinking about it and wondering what the potential consequences would be if she gave in.

Having a man’s arms around her felt like home again. Even for the briefest of moments, she could remember Derek and how much he loved her. Rose could close her eyes and think of him and miss him and live in the past; a place where she felt safe. Life in the present wasn’t safe at all. Rose hated most of her life and constantly wanted to turn back time and go back to when Derek was alive.

Nothing and no one felt the same as Derek. Rose wasn’t trying to actually replace him, just to fill her memory of him for a little longer. Then to forget the pain that those memories inevitable brought up after she felt them.

It was a constant battle of her brain between remembering the love that she lost and trying to move forward. Sometimes she didn’t know which she wanted at all. But having a man in her bed meant she didn’t have to worry about anything else. She didn’t have to think about the past and didn’t have to worry about the future. Sex was her simple solution to the most difficult loss of her life.

Bronx was sweet and kept his arms wrapped around her while they danced. He didn’t push her to answer him and seemed content to let Rose stay close to him without any answer. She did like Bronx, it wasn’t that she despised him. Just that Bronx was so young and naive and obviously just out to have fun. She let her mind wander to the possibility of talking to him about being ‘Friends with Benefits’ but then changed her mind. She didn’t want to give him more opportunity to wiggle into her life.

“No, I can’t take you home tonight,” Rose finally answered Bronx.

“Why not?”

Bronx didn’t wait for an answer, and instead, leaned in and kissed Rose. His mouth was firm on hers, and she could feel his desire for her. There was no doubt that they would have another passion filled evening if she did say yes. His lips were soft and gently touched hers and moved away again. He continued with small butterfly kisses, and Rose didn’t fight him. She was in that delightful middle ground of desire and couldn’t help thinking about how his mouth felt when he brought her to orgasm the week before.

Slowly she let him kiss her, their lips moving gently together as he pressed her body close to his. Bronx wasn’t the kind of guy who gave up easily, Rose could tell that, but she knew if she gave him a tiny glimpse of hope, it would be worse than denying him for good.

“I better get back to my friends,” she said firmly.

“I’m not going to stop you know. I think you and I would be perfect together. I think you’ll fall in love with me.”

The words cut through her like a knife, and she felt like her heart would actually explode right there on the dance floor. She didn’t want love—she only wanted sex. How dare he even suggest that she wanted to fall in love? What kind of woman would want to fall in love at all after losing the man of her dreams? Well, not Rose; she didn’t want love, and Bronx certainly had no idea who she was if that was what he thought she wanted from him.

“Bronx, I said no!” Rose screamed and pushed him away.

She wasn’t going to fall in love with anyone, and certainly not him. She stormed away from him and didn’t feel at all bad for the scene she had caused. Rose didn’t want love, that was the last thing in the world she wanted.

“Are you alright?” Mike asked as he grabbed her arm gently when she got off the dance floor.

“I’m okay; I just need to get out of here—can you drive me?”

“Sure.”

“Rose, come on, let’s talk about this. There’s no need to leave. Especially with a chump like that.”

“Bronx, leave me alone,” Rose said, grabbing onto Mike’s arm and walking with him to her friends to say her goodbyes.

She glanced back and saw Bronx looking at her. He had a look in his eyes that made her feel horrible. It was a judgmental look suggesting he knew exactly what she was doing. Of course he did. He had to know she was planning to take Mike back to her place and have an evening similar to the one she’d had with Bronx the weekend before.

Rose didn’t care if it hurt his feelings. Bronx wasn’t going to be her boyfriend or anything close, and he needed to get that through his thick head. She was a free woman, free to do whatever she wanted with herself and free to fuck whomever she wanted.