“Twins.” The word still feels foreign on my tongue. Two babies.
“You don’t do things by half measure do you, man?” Liam chuckles, regarding me with happiness. “Actually, you do them by double measure!” He guffaws, slapping me on the back in camaraderie, which only earns him a glare from his wife.
He’s known me for far too long not to realize how much this means to me. Since he first noticed the way I looked at Kierra at one of our first meetings, he never stopped his bullshit. For more than too long he’s told me to go for it. To be honest. Now that I finally have done it, I couldn’t be happier. She’s finally accepted that I’m not going anywhere.
“Seriously, Liam. You’re not that funny, at least not all the time.” Emma quips, lifting her brow in a high arch as she regards my best friend.
“Baby, you didn’t say that last night when I—”
“Okay! I do NOT need to be scarred right now,” I grunt, pushing up from the sofa. We’ve just finished our meeting with Kierra and Callum about the world tour coming up next year. It takes a lot to organize, but we’ve all agreed we’re outsourcing everything. I don’t want my woman working long hours when she’s pregnant.
I am as bad as Callum.
“Ryan.” Turning to regard Liam, he waits for me to respond to a question I didn’t hear. “I asked if you wanted to order in? Emm and I are thinking of calling delivery.”
“Yeah, sure. I’m going to head into the music room. I’ve got something to finish.” With that, I walk out, leaving them to decide on dinner. Me, on the other hand, I’ve got something special to work on. Making my way up toward the music room which houses the piano, I stalk past the kitchen where Callum and Kierra are talking about the venue options for next year.
Since we’re doing four acoustic shows, set up will be different and we’ll also need permission if we’re playing in the church in Paris. It’s a beautiful old building which allows for brilliant acoustics.
My plan is to sit down and finish the song I’d been writing for Ki. She doesn’t know about it yet, but when I play it, I know she’ll never forget about our journey. Pushing open the door, I step inside and lock myself inside.
* * *
Stepping into the offices of Howard and Associates, I’ve got Kierra’s hand firmly grasped in mine. This is it, the moment of truth. “It’s going to be okay, you know?” Turning my gaze on Ki, I can’t help but feel my heart fill with love for her. I’m meant to be giving her support, yet here she is showing me more than I could ever possibly want or need.
The emotion in her eyes is clear. She’s here no matter what the outcome of this meeting is. It won’t change a thing between us. I’ll marry her, she’ll be my partner for life, and if it means we have another little girl to care for, then so be it.
Honestly, I’m nervous. Not because I might be a father already, but because I don’t know how I’d handle having a child I may only see on weekends, or perhaps won’t have a chance to watch grow up. Something tells me Tiffany isn’t going to be forthcoming with allowing me into her daily life.
“Mr. Callahan, nice to see you again,” Peter, our lawyer rises from his seat when we walk into the boardroom.
“Good to see you, Mr. Howard.” We shake hands, then he offers Kierra a warm smile. They’ve been our legal assistance since the band formed ten years ago. I trust them with everything I have.
“Take a seat, I received the results this morning from the hospital and I’m sure opposing counsel has as well. Look Ryan, I can’t really tell you what the right thing to do is, but we’ll make sure you’re safe from any slander.” His serious tone makes my chest tighten with anxiety. Just then, Kierra pushes up and rushes out the door. It only takes me a second to race after her and right into the ladies’ room which is thankfully empty.
“Baby, Kiki, are you okay?” She’s in the stall and I can’t do anything about it, unless I break the damn door down.
“Just give me a minute, Ryan.”
I can tell she’s crying. I know this woman so well I can pick up on the slightest change in her demeanor. This can’t be easy for her, I just wish I could lessen the tension. When the stall door opens and Kierra steps out, her eyes are bloodshot. “Baby,” she allows me to pull her into my arms. Her body shakes and I know she’s crying.
“I’m sorry, just… I’m overly emotional.” I step away from her, lifting her chin so I can look into those stormy eyes.
“Never be sorry. It’s difficult, I know I’ve put you in this position, but I’m yours. You’re mine. This is a formality, Ki. It doesn’t matter what happens in there, I’m not letting you walk out of my life.” She nods, and I can’t help planting a soft kiss on her lips. “Now let’s go find out the results.”
Walking down the hall toward the meeting room has the tension hanging thick in the air. Once we step inside, Mr. Howard offers a nod. “I doubt Ms. Edwards and her lawyer will be much longer and we can then go ahead with the findings.” He’s right, it’s not long when Tiffany walks in followed by an older gentleman who looks like he’s ready to go into battle. Her daughter isn’t with her, which makes me wonder where the little girl is.
Once all the pleasantries are out of the way, Mr. Howard offers me the envelope. “You’re welcome to open that and we’ll go into more detail with what’s going to happen with the result.” My hand trembles when I lift the white package from the dark wood table. My heart catapults into my throat with anxiousness. I don’t know what I want it to be. A negative or positive.
“I… I just hope it’s what you want. If she is yours, I don’t want you to feel as if you need to do anything or be there. If you don’t want to of course.” Tiffany murmurs from across the table. I bristle at her words. Ripping the envelope open, I pull the pages out and inhale a deep breath. When my gaze scans over the words I have to read and re read them. Lifting my gaze, I meet hers. The stranger before me.
Without a word, I slide the envelope along with the pages over to her and the lawyer seated beside her. My emotions are all over the place. Skittering down my spine is a shiver of confusion.
I knew it. I felt it in my gut.
It was something I’d wanted, but not. The one emotion I find at the forefront is relief.
I’m not the father. She’s not mine.
“I’m sorry Ryan. This has been… I’m just sorry.” The woman says to me, but I can’t look at her. I’m not sure why. I’ve never been one for anger, but right now, I feel it.
“Why did you do this?” I question, spinning to face her. Guilt flashes over her features. Her gaze drops, it’s dark and guarded. “Just tell me something before you go. What made you wait two years to come to me? You could have told me when you found out you were pregnant. This is something that could ruin my career. Is it personal gain?”
“I needed help and I thought if I could find her father he could help me financially. I wasn’t sure who the father was. There were two men I knew it could be, you being one of them. I didn’t do it to hurt you.” She sighs then, lifting her gaze to mine. “I just wanted my daughter to know her father.”
“And I’m not him.” My words are terse, filled with anger. Pushing up, I shake my lawyers hand, “I need air.” Stalking out of the boardroom, I find a quiet spot near the terrace that’s situated near the exit. The view of the Hollywood hills greets me and I can’t help wondering what would have happened if it was my child. I can’t let that thought in right now. There’s only one woman who needs me and she’s got me, all of me.
“Ryan, are you okay?” Kierra’s soft tone comes from behind me.
“I am.” Turning, I meet her gaze dead on. “I’m not the father.” Her smile is bright, the tension that surrounded her only moments ago has dissipated and I can’t help feeling the happiness that this woman brings into my life. “We can move on without anything in the way. It’s us, no one else.” She smiles then, wrapping her arms around my waist, I lean in and inhale her scent. Sweet, like a dessert I’ll never tire of tasting. Mine.