Christmas morning whizzes by in a blur of great coffee, pancakes with maple syrup, tinsel, and wrapping paper. The house smells of festivity and the sound of laughter recharges my soul. Everyone loves the quilts I’ve made them, and the others have stuck to the rules about making their gifts too. When Jem cries tears of happiness while opening the last present from under the tree revealing a beautiful music journal that Liana has made the cover for, I sigh happily in Dad’s old armchair, knowing that I’m doing right by my family.

“Are you ready for your present now?” Tim asks with a grin.

“Huh?” Leaning forward, I reach behind me to retrieve my stash. “I’ve already got my presents,” I say, smiling as I look at the photo of them all in a hand-decorated frame, the beaded necklace and key-chain, and the pen-drive with a new music playlist.

Waving a hand at me, he grins. “There’s just one more. Only this one wouldn’t fit under the tree.” The others crowd me with poorly restrained excitement.

Confused, I search their faces. “What is this?”

“Let’s blindfold her!” squeals Ros, jumping up and disappearing from the living room. Returning with a scarf, she and Liana wrap it around my head as I try to get clues from Tim and Jem.

“Seriously. What is going on?”

“You’ll see,” Jem says, pulling me up from my chair and guiding me through the house.

At the front door, they get into their coats and help me into mine. Putting on my boots is the hardest part of being dressed whilst blindfolded, but it leaves us all laughing.

We slip and scramble down the front steps and crunch along the frozen ground.

“Where are we going?” I ask, twisting my face under the scarf in an attempt to relieve an itch as it tickles my nose.

“Right here,” Tim says as I’m brought to a stop. The scarf is unraveled and I blink at the bright light of day as my eyes adjust.

I’m standing in front of a car and my beaming siblings. Tim hands me a key.

“A car?”

“I know it doesn’t look like much,” Tim says, holding his palms up. “I got it cheap, but I did all the work myself and it’s safe as houses. Winter tires, and there are chains in the back if you run into heavier snow. The engine is in good order, it’s cheap to run, and it’ll live forever. You can come and go as you please now, because you won’t be waiting on me to give you a lift. What do you think?”

Running my eyes over the little blue hatchback, I wipe my eyes. “I love it!” Sniffing, I give them all a hug. “We’re a two car family!”

Laughing, Tim shakes his head. “This isn’t for you to come home to do the soccer run, Kat. It’s to give you the freedom to go exploring. Go get a life.”

“I have a life!” I counter, running my hand along the roof of the car as I walk around it. “I love my life.” Adjusting the side mirror, I open the door. “But I have always wanted my own little car, so thank-you so much guys!”

Ducking my head inside, I immediately notice the new stereo, as it shines amidst the older dials along the dash. Standing back up, I give Tim a stern look.

“It was in there when I bought it,” he says with an innocent smile.

“You’re a terrible liar.”

“Yeah, well... so are you. You really like it?”

“I love it. Thank you. Shall we go for a drive?” I ask holding up the key. The twins jump up and down as Jem opens the door and herds them into the back seat. Tim and I jump in the front and as a family, we take a spin around the quiet streets of Franklinville on a tour of everyone’s festively decorated houses.

“Next year we’ll do that,” Tim says with firm belief. “I’ve got a little money saved up, and I’m going to hit the Boxing Day sales to get all the discounted lights.” Looking behind him to the twins, he proceeds to describe his vision that they will have to help deliver come Christmas next year. They lap up every word, declaring which areas they’ll be responsible for, right down to decorating the mailbox. Jem suggests setting some of the lighting to music, and claims her job as music selector, because she’ll be away while they do the decorating and won’t be able to help.

I can do nothing but smile as I drive, because my family makes a great team. “I’ll bake the cookies and keep the workers fueled. And Tim, make sure everyone is safe. Whoever goes up on the roof wears a harness - got it?”

“Yeah, yeah. We’ll be fine.”

“I’m serious. I’ll pay for two harnesses if you need a helper up there. Just don’t take unnecessary risks.”

“Roger that, Captain.” Saluting me, he and the girls laugh as he starts playing the role of co-pilot, flicking switches and radioing in messages of chilling the hell out and enjoying the ride.

As we pull back up to the house, we’re all in great spirits and eager to get our Christmas feast under way.

The front door opens over at the Coulson house and Andy steps out. Seeing us, he waves and we all wave back, shouting out cheerful well wishes. Andy’s father appears behind him and the smile vanishes from my face.

Brett Coulson looks older than I remember him, but he would still be considered a handsome man, I think. It’s hard for me to be objective, because I have spent so long disliking him. He looks like an older, sterner version of Andy, but his blond hair is nearly white now, and his blue eyes seem cool and repellent while Andy’s always look warm and welcoming.

Andy looks behind him, and then directly at me, as if he’s noticed the change in mood I’ve felt. Looking away quickly, I use the bulk of my siblings to hide behind as I rush inside.

***

IT’S A BIT COZY, BUT if we sit the right way, we can all fit on the big couch in front of the television. With our feet up in front, we nurse our bulging bellies while we watch It’s a Wonderful Life. It is the end of a perfect family Christmas.

When there is a knock on the door, all of us groan a little. Warm and comfortable, and having eaten far too much, we’re probably all about five minutes from lapsing into over-indulgence comas.

“I’ll get it.” Peeling myself from the end of the couch, I stretch enough to get my legs to work and drag myself down the hall to the front door.

The blast of cold air wakes me up instantly as I open the door, but it’s Andy Coulson that makes me gasp.

“Andy. Hi.” Looking over my shoulder into the house, I open the door a little wider. “You want to come in?”

Shaking his head, Andy appears nervous.

“You want to talk to me?”

His eyes find mine and hold them.

I knew this day would come. Confession time.

“It won’t take long,” he says, as if he already knows he’ll run screaming before too long.

Reaching for my coat, I slip my feet into Tim’s boots and call over my shoulder. “I’ll be back in a minute. Don’t pause the movie.”

Stepping out onto the stoop with Andy, I shut the door behind me and take a deep breath.

“I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable, Kat. It’s just that seeing you after all this time brought all my old feelings back, and I...” He shakes his head. “I’m leaving in the morning.” Fishing something out of his pocket, he hands it to me. His business card. “You can reach me anytime. I’ll be in Buffalo on business in a few weeks, and I’d love to see you, but I’ll understand if... you’re busy. I just can’t leave without telling you... I wanted you to know that... I’m not wearing holiday goggles, ThunderKat.”

Taking my face in his hands, Andy Coulson kisses me. Kisses me.

His tongue flicks along the crease between my lips and I gasp a little, which gives him access to enter. Gently coaxing me to open more fully, his mouth keeps me paralyzed somewhere between fear, and ‘Oh-my-God-I-always-wanted-Andy-Coulson-to-do-this! I’m fairly certain his hands are the only things keeping me upright at this point. As his tongue strokes mine, I whimper in either encouragement, or protest. I forget which it should be as his arms come around me.

“Andrew?”

Mr. Coulson’s voice is a bucket of cold water dousing the flames being kindled between us. Pulling back with a start, I glance in the direction of the call, but can’t see Brett. Looking back to Andy, I cover my mouth, scared by what I have done.

Lunging for the door, I shake my head. “I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”

Clawing at the doorknob, I get inside and shut the door behind me. Panting as I lean against it, I meet the eyes of my siblings who have been spying through the side windows.

“Are you kidding me?” Storming towards the kitchen, I put the kettle on. “I told you to keep watching the movie!”

“Which we decided was code for: I’m about to play tonsil hockey with the guy next door,” Ros explains in a matter-of-fact tone. “Duh.”

“So you thought you’d all come and watch?”

“Had to prove the theory,” Tim says with a shrug as he gets the cups out. “Totally holds up.”

“No it doesn’t.”

“Deny it all you want,” Jem says with a chuckle. “You were definitely kissing him out there. We all saw it.”

“I was not. He kissed me.”

“Yeah,” Li agrees. “But you liked it, I could tell.”

Staring at her, I’m about to deny it, when I realize that I do not want to be involved in this conversation. Zipping my mouth shut, I take my tea and escape to the living room.

As my family return with their own drinks and snuggle back into their positions, I re-start the movie.

“We voted,” Li whispers as she leans her head on my shoulder. “We all think you should go for it.”

Stiffening, I look down at her, then at each of the others. “Do I get a say?”

Jem waves a dismissive hand at me as her eyes stay trained on the TV. “Nah. You’ll only use us as an excuse for why you can’t have a boyfriend, but if we make the decision, then you get to be happy too.”

The statement leaves me speechless. Apparently my silence is taken as my acceptance that my siblings now command my love-life, because any further argument is forgotten as they become re-absorbed in the movie; and while I’m grateful for the break it gives me, I do not find any peace with the situation gnawing at me.