Dex
The events of this afternoon will be forever burned into my memory. The violence, the blood, it was all overkill and nothing less than what he deserved. I can feel my own blood rushing around my body and euphoria like sensation coursing just as fast.
I climb the steps up to the bar behind Slade and Sparky and the pair don’t say a word. I haven’t underestimated the brothers before, but today has opened my eyes to how deep their love and loyalty lie with one another.
I find myself not stopping to order a drink and walk over to the main house. It’s fucked up, but I need to see Melissa. I have her brother’s blood on my hands but I need to hold her, to know she wants me as much as I want her.
She’s sitting in the corner of the kitchen, it’s obvious she isn’t a part of the conversation going on and she looks uncomfortable.
“Which rooms are free upstairs?” I ask Alannah.
“All of them.”
I jerk my chin and Melissa is quick on her feet and once we’re in the hall, I take hold of her hand in mine. I don’t miss her flinch at my touch.
Alannah said all the rooms were free so I open the first door at the top of the landing and close it behind us.
Once alone, Melissa pulls away from me and walks to the other side of the room. She stares out of the window and I stay where I am by the door.
“Is that Danny’s or Cayden’s blood on your hands?” she asks.
“Danny’s.”
“Are they both dead?”
I promised her nothing but the truth, I’m not going to break my word so I answer, “Yes.”
I give her a moment to take it in and see what she’s going to do next. Only, she continues to stare outside and I can’t stand to guess any longer.
“I’m not sorry they’re dead but I am sorry you’re in this position,” I say, trying to get her to look at me.
It doesn’t work and I cross the room and turn her myself. She drops her eyes and refuses to look at me. I don’t blame her but it’s frustrating.
“We have so much to talk about, it’ll help if you look at me.”
She does and I see nothing but pain and tears in her eyes.
“Did you watch them die?” she asks.
“Only Danny, Cayden died a couple of days ago, I wasn’t there.”
“He’s been dead for two days,” she says in a sob.
“Yes.”
Her legs start to wobble and she backs up and falls down on the bed. I burn to sit next to her, but I give her space and remain by the window.
“Cas said he was going to kill them but deep down, I didn’t believe him. I’ve seen nothing but blood and death since Cas tricked me into coming here, I should’ve believed every word he said.”
She hangs her head in her hands and her body that I love against mine is racked with sobs. She doesn’t make a sound and she brushes me away when I finally go to hold her.
“I don’t know if I’m coming or going, what I’m thinking, how I feel about you. I need time to get my head straight,” she blurts out.
“Sure, but I can’t let you go. For one, I don’t want to and secondly, Cas won’t want you out of my sight.”
“You will literally do anything he tells you to, won’t you. Don’t you care how I feel or how you feel?”
“Please don’t put that on me, we only met because your brother killed one of ours. From the minute I came to you, we both knew it would be hard. We have to figure out if it’s worth it from now on.”
I go to place my hand on hers and she jumps up.
“I can’t have you touching me, you confuse me and I can’t think straight when you do.”
“Melissa, we can’t change anything. You have to figure out if you can look at me, be around the club and build a life with me and not see your brothers. I want you and I want us to work, I really fucking do. If I could change everything I’ve done to you and erase the pain and upset I’ve given you, I would. I’ll give you some time to think but I won’t be far.”
No matter where she goes or what she decides, I won’t be far at all. She finally gives me her full attention and asks, “If it came down to me or the club, who would save?”
I exhale loudly and run my fingers through my hair, gripping onto the ends and pulling.
“Hopefully, it will never come down to that and we don’t have to ever know.”
It’s not what she wants to hear but I honestly don’t know.
“Do you know how fucked up that sounds? It will always be the club, and we both know it.”
I stand and pull her against me.
“I haven’t felt like this about anyone, I would never let anyone hurt you, and I sure as shit don’t like seeing you upset. I think I can make you happy, and I know I can make you feel good. We can start afresh and move on together. I wouldn’t have to choose between you and the club because you would be one and the same.”
I hope she’s taking this in.
“You’re strong and protective, you’re beautiful and stand up for what you believe in, please believe in us because I’m falling for you and I believe in us.”
I wipe away her tears and wrap my arms around her and ride her sobs out with her. I’ve made my feelings clear for her and I know what she’s going to say.
“I need time.”
I knew it.
“I’ll give you as much as you want.”
I move away from her and she wipes her eyes until they are dry. She takes a deep breath and stands.
"I need to see my brother," she says adamantly.
"He'll be over in the bar, but I'm not sure you should go be there."
"Why not?"
How can she be so dense when I know she isn't?
"The brothers are celebrating, Melissa."
"Celebrating my brother's death," she says, quietly, finally understanding.
She juts her chin out and straightens her shoulders.
"Regardless, I still need to see Kyle."
"Let's go then," I say, opening the door.
"I'll wait for you to wash my brother's blood off and then we'll go, plus, I need to sort my makeup out."
I look down at my hands and I barely see the blood anymore but I nod, and leave for the bathroom.
I run the water and lather the soap into a bubble frenzy. I doubt any of the other brothers will have washed the blood away and I'm not sure how Melissa is going to react. She's been acting like she doesn’t care, but her reaction when she heard her brothers were dead was perfectly normal and a little unexpected. I never know what to expect with her.
Rinsing my hands under the water, I turn the tap off and grab the towel off the shelf.
I need to be on my game when taking her into the bar. The brothers won't stand for her ruining their party and she doesn’t give a fuck if she's the reason the club isn't happy.
"I'm good to go," I call through and wait in the hall.
I double check making sure I washed all the blood away and narrow my eyes when she hasn’t come out of the bedroom. She was dying to get to her brother, why isn't she out here yet?
"Melissa?"
I head towards the bedroom and gently push the door open. She's gone.
Why can't she ever fucking listen? I run down the stairs and jog over to the clubhouse. I scan the bar and find her in a hushed conversation in the corner with Kyle. I hang back out of their sight for a moment and then move closer so I can try and hear what they're saying. Whatever they're talking about, it has Melissa looking worried.
I jerk forward when Kyle shoves her and then grabs onto her arm, pulling her into him and roughly whispering something into her ear.
"Hey, man. What's going on here?" I ask, making myself known.
"Nothing," he says, releasing her, "My sister's a little upset over today's events. She's fine now, aren't you, Lissa?"
She doesn’t look fine, she looks worried and I don’t like it.
"I'm okay, I was trying to convince Kyle to come home one last time, that's all."
She's lying. The problem with wearing all your emotions for everyone to see is you can't lie for shit.
"She tells me you want to be with her, if that's true then keep her away from me or she's going to ruin everything for the both of us."
He walks off and both, Melissa and I, are left watching him retreat to the bar. She reaches out and holds onto my arm, it's not until I hold onto her that she flinches and pulls away, like she didn’t even know she did it. If her instincts are to come to me in times of need, I'll take it as a good sign.
"I need a drink; shall we sit at the bar?" she asks.
"I thought you wanted space from me?"
Her laugh is sad and she sounds tired.
"Between you, the club and all three of my brothers, I don’t have a fucking clue what I want so let's get drunk and see what happens because I'm sick of trying to figure it out."
Her shoulders sag and I burn to hold her.
"Everything will work out, I swear it to you."
"I'm not so sure," she mutters and turns her back on me.
I follow her to the bar and like the last time we were sat here, I feel nothing but confusion and lust for this woman. Kyle stays at the other end of the bar and it's Scotty who serves us.
"I'll have a very large vodka, straight."
"And I'll take a beer."
For an hour she throws back drink after drink and the alcohol seems to bounce straight off her. Although, her glazy eyes never leave her brother. I put my beer down and keep a closer eye on her, and to do that, I need to be sober.
"He's made his choice, you'll be better off letting him live how he wants," I say, attempting to ease her pain.
"Trust me, he isn't thinking properly."
"It's not so bad here, if he patches in he can make good money, he'll have brothers watching his back, he'll do okay with us."
She slams her empty glass down and her head falls back as she sighs.
"I can't do this again, order me another drink," she demands, sliding off her stool and falls against me.
"Who knows, maybe I'll let you take me to bed," she purrs.
"Okay, no more to drink for you. As much as I want to fuck you, I promised you I'd give you space. However, I'm still going to look after you."
"I shouldn’t, but I like the idea of you looking after me," she admits.
I run the backs of my fingers along her cheek and sweep the few strands of hair away from her face.
"Forget everything we've been through and let us be together," I urge.
I know what I want now and I will do what I can to have her.