CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Ashton
Let’s see how well Ashton Carmichael can perform under pressure!
Fires were scary as shit.
My nerves were on edge from the second Beau texted me earlier in the day. I played it off well when what I really wanted to say was, Can you just come home, please? ’K, thanks, bye.
Obviously, this was what he did. He always had, and I wasn’t freaking out like this every day, but I’d heard the tremor in his voice when we’d talked about his job, the knowledge of just how dangerous it was. How was I supposed to deal with this all the time? And wait…all the time? Apparently, I was getting a little ahead of myself too.
Trying to ignore those thoughts, I called his mom and offered to pick Kenny up and take him with me. I went to Campbell’s Confections, and she told me she’d meet us at the game; then Kenny came out and got in the car with me.
The last thing I wanted was to overreact and stress him out, but who the fuck knew—Kenny seemed to have his shit together more than most people I knew. Maybe was more settled about Beau running toward fires than I was. I just wanted to kidnap Beau.
From the passenger seat, Kenny asked, “Is Beau your boyfriend?” prompting me to swerve into the other lane, get honked at, and almost kill my maybe boyfriend’s brother. I was doing awesome.
“Huh?” I answered with, my hands suddenly sweaty and my heart running a marathon. Now I had to worry about Beau and figure out how in the fuck to answer this.
“Do you love Beau? I love Lori.”
My throat swelled. Shit, I couldn’t breathe. I suddenly couldn’t fucking breathe. Love? How did we get from boyfriends to love? And was this something everyone assumed? That we were boyfriends in love?
Oh God. I was going to puke.
Not that I didn’t want to be Beau’s boyfriend, because let’s be honest, I really fucking did. And we maybe already were, and we’d kind of talked about it, but it was different talking to Beau than anyone else. That didn’t change the fact that I didn’t know what the fuck to do. I wasn’t ready for anyone to know. What if everyone knew?
I settled on, “Who’s Lori?” as I gripped the steering wheel and held back the urge to vomit while running the car off the road with the brother of my boyfriend, whom I might be in love with, in it. Beau was going to kill me. He was going to have to fight a big-ass fire and then put out the extra energy to kill me.
“She’s from the center…she’s pretty. Do you think Beau is pretty?”
I swallowed hard. Beau was sexy as hell. He got my dick hard in no time flat, and yeah, he was beautiful, but I was pretty sure I wasn’t supposed to say all that to Kenny.
“Does Lori know how you feel?” I asked.
“Yes. I’m going to ask Beau to take us on a date.”
My heart melted right there on the damn spot. I wanted to take Beau on a date with Lori and Kenny.
But I wouldn’t…not yet. Even just thinking about it made me dizzy. It was one thing when it was just me and Beau, but I didn’t know how to do this with other people. Christ, what would my old teammates say? I’d been the talk of the league for years, and I didn’t want that anymore.
“Is Beau your boyfriend?”
“No,” jumped out of my mouth before I could think about it. Bile burned my throat. It felt wrong…it was wrong, but then, I wasn’t out. I didn’t know what was expected of me. Beau would understand, wouldn’t he?
“Oh.” Kenny looked down at his lap, and I knew I’d disappointed him along with myself. “You make him happy. Beau’s a hero. He should be happy.”
I pulled into the parking lot of the gymnasium and turned off the car. My throat was still tight, my chest heavy, but that fear was still there, a powerful weight that wouldn’t release me. “Beau is a hero. He’s the best man I know, and he does deserve to be happy. He’s…very important to me.” He was maybe everything to me. My probably boyfriend that I was likely in love with. But I didn’t know how to publicly be in love with Beau.
“People think I don’t understand, but I do. I wouldn’t be afraid if I loved someone. I love Lori.”
Then, without another word, Kenny got out of the car. Me? I sat there and heard what he said…wished it was that easy. Was it? Was loving Beau really that easy?
The game was a fucking disaster. I coached for shit. We lost…fucking lost, and it was the night I coached. I couldn’t concentrate on the game—just Beau, me, the fucking fire, what Kenny said.
After the game the gym became a madhouse. Visitors from the other team bombarded me—Ashton, can you sign…any chance you’ll come out of retirement…would you like to go out after… I was dizzy by the end of it, my head spinning. I’d let Kenny and the team down, fans, myself.
And fuck, where was Beau? I still hadn’t heard from him, and neither had his mom.
I hid out until everyone had left, went home, took a shower, and drank a fucking beer. I didn’t know why tonight shook me up so much. It was maybe a hundred people at the game. I’d been in stadiums with thousands.
Would it go public now? Would I wake up to articles talking about how I coached Kenny’s team? Would reporters come out?
“Is Beau your boyfriend?”
Aaaaand, time for another beer. Which I drank. Then looked at my phone. Then drank another. Then told myself to chill the fuck out.
Before I knew it, Beau was there, and I was glad I didn’t lock up. My room was dark, and his fingers were brushing against my face. I didn’t know what time it was, when or how in the hell I fell asleep. I just knew he was fucking there, and I needed him.
“Sorry to wake you. Should I not have come over? I just…”
“Come here.” I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him on top of me. His weight was a welcome relief, a comfort I needed.
Yes…yes, he is my boyfriend.
My tongue dipped into his mouth, my nails dug into his hips, his cock hard against mine.
Yes…yes, he is my boyfriend.
“We lost the game. Fuck, I can’t believe we lost the game,” I said between kisses. I was angry at myself, felt like I let him down, in more ways than one. “My head was all fucked up. I was worried about you and…” Kenny asked if we were boyfriends.
“Hey.” Beau pushed up onto his hands, his arms boxing me in. “Who cares about the game? It happens.”
“My ego cares about the game just a little bit.” I was an ex-professional-player. I should have been able to keep my head in it better.
“I’m fine, Ash,” he said as though he had a direct link to my insides. “I’m fine.”
“We both know you’re hot, so stop rubbing it in.”
“Stop avoiding.”
“I want you,” I admitted. “Can I have you, Campbell?” I cupped his ass through his jeans, my need on my tongue.
Yes, yes, he is my boyfriend.
Though that didn’t really feel like a strong enough word, did it?
“You want inside me?” Beau asked, burying his face in my neck, licking my collarbone. “I’ve been dying to have you in my ass.”
“What a coincidence. I’ve been dying to be there. Maybe we should get naked?”
“You think?” Beau went to pull away, but I grabbed ahold of him.
“You fought a fire today.”
“You’ve said that to me before. I fight a lot of them. It’s what I do.”
“It…scares me…the thought of losing you.” I’d lost too much—my biological parents had walked away, my adoptive parents died…football…
“I’m not going anywhere. I promise. I mean, you’re Ashton fucking Carmichael.” He winked at me.
“You gonna shut up so I can fuck you, or what? This is sort of a big deal, Campbell. I’m about to make love to a man for the first time.” It didn’t escape my attention that I said make love. I’d never made love in my life. I’d never done anything that resembled something real, except with Beau. Luckily, he either didn’t catch it or knew not to call me on it.
“I’m not the one always talking; that’s you.”
I pulled him down, and we kissed and laughed. We rolled over, still kissing and laughing, and fuck, there was no one in the world I liked laughing with more than Beau Campbell.
It was rushed after that as we tugged at each other’s clothes, throwing them around the room. I gasped when I had him naked, at the large bandage on his right pec, and yeah, maybe also because Beau naked was a beautiful thing.
“I’m fine,” he said again. “Something hit me, is all.” Then he was kissing his way down my body, nuzzling my heavy balls, rubbing his scruff against my sensitive dick, kissing and licking me.
“If my cock goes in your mouth, I’m blowing my load. I can tell you that right now.”
“I’m that good, huh?” he teased.
“How did you become the cocky one?”
“Just love your dick.” He licked it from base to head, and I literally almost fucking died.
“You’ll love it in your ass too. Christ, I want inside you something fierce.”
Beau rolled off me, onto his back, and spread his legs. “Then I guess you better come and get me.”
Well…when he put it like that…
My hands trembled as I reached over and grabbed the lube and a condom from the drawer. I’d ordered them online, hoping this moment would be coming soon. I clicked on the bedside lamp, which bathed the room in a soft light. I knelt between Beau’s muscular, spread thighs.
“You’re really going to let me in there?” I brushed a finger over his tight ring of muscle.
“I’m going to fucking love you in there.”
My dick spurted against my stomach. Fuck, he was so damn sexy. I’d never been turned on the way Beau got me going. “I guess you’re right. I am pretty good at this.”
“Stop stalling, Ash. Lemme feel you. It’s been a while for me, so you’re gonna have to do some stretching first.”
After tossing the condom on the bed, I pumped lube onto my fingers. Beau held himself open for me, waiting for me, and fuck, I couldn’t wait to give it to him.
It wasn’t the first time I fingered him; still, I reveled in how tight he was, how fucking hot.
“You can give me two fingers. I fucking want it.”
“You’re killing me, Campbell.” I pushed two fingers inside, and we let out heavy breaths in unison. I pushed my fingers in, played with his prostate the way he’d taught me to do. I was learning his body through his instruction, and though part of me was insecure because of that, the other part fucking loved it. This was something special between Beau and me that I’d never have with anyone else.
He pushed against me, rode my fingers. I was in awe of his pleasure, the fact that he could take part of me inside him, own it, claim it, fucking love it.
“If you don’t get inside me soon, I think I might die.”
That was enough encouragement for me.
I ripped open the condom wrapper and rolled it down my length. I lubed up my cock just as Beau rolled over. He was sort of on his side and stomach, his top leg bent and his bottom straight, giving me access to his ass. Kneeling with one leg behind him and one between his, I angled my cock toward him. “Fuck, I can’t believe this is happening.” None of it…Beau…me…Beau and I together.
I pushed between his cheeks, watched as my crown breached his rim. “Fuck…oh fuck…” He was tight…so fucking tight and hot, and holy shit, I couldn’t take my eyes off him. Off his body opening up and taking me inside. “Goddamn it…you’re so fucking sexy, Campbell.” His hole spread as I pushed farther and farther inside. His body fit me like a glove, like he was made for me.
“More. You feel so good. Give me more, Ash.”
We were both trembling, both sweating as I worked my way inside. When I was buried inside him, my eyes rolled back. I couldn’t move. I knew if I did, I’d blow my load. “I can’t believe I’m inside you.” It felt like everything had led up to this moment, since that kiss on the dock, maybe even before. They’d all been stepping stones to get me here, to get us here.
He used his top arm to pull me down, to kiss me until I couldn’t fucking breathe. When I pulled away, he asked, “Are you fucking me or not?”
I was. I so fucking was. Pushing up onto my knees again, I used my hand to spread his cheeks, watched his body let me go as I pulled out, accept me as I shoved inside him again. I took him slow, nearly fucking died in the process, but I wanted this to last.
His nails dug into my arm, and I suddenly wanted to kiss the smiley-face scar on his arm. It was a silly thing to think in that moment, but I couldn’t help it.
My body felt alive, nerve endings going crazy, sparking wildfires through every inch of me. Beau begged for more, made sexy sounds in the back of his throat every time I slammed home.
“I’m not gonna last,” I admitted. My balls were heavy, filled with come, my orgasm burning through me as it waited to explode.
“Me neither. Fuck, me neither.”
I pulled out, rolled him. Hefting his legs over my shoulders, I pushed inside again. Beau spit in his hand, wrapped it around his cock. Just seeing it made lust shoot through me, rain down on me.
He jerked himself, eyes locked on mine as I continued to pound into him. “Come first,” I begged because I really fucking needed to please him.
“Right there, right fucking there.”
He tilted his head back, opened his mouth, showed me his pleasure. I bit my lip, fucked harder into him as his body quaked, tightened, his load shooting out on his lip, on the bandage on his chest.
“Fuck… Goddamn, you’re beautiful,” I gritted out before my own orgasm barreled into me, washed over me as my body felt like it came apart, just shattered, my come filling the condom inside him…inside my boyfriend.