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Heart & Soul by Sienna Grant (23)

Elliott

Fuuuckkkk! How can I go up there like this? I’ll slip into the bathroom first and calm down - I’ll have to. Reaching the top of the stairs I pop my head in through the door.

“Be just a minute bud.”

I enter the bathroom and lock the door. Taking a couple of breaths in and out, I rest my hands on the vanity unit and try to think about anything but that woman who can fire me up quicker than anything. I splash some cold water on my face and straighten up to stand. Patting my face dry on the towel next to the sink, I think I’m ready and calm enough to see what my boy wants.

“Hey.” Pushing open the door fully, I walk in and sit at the side of him on the bed. “What’s up bud.”

“Nothing, I wanted to say goodnight.”

I can feel the smile that’s pulling at the corners of my mouth.

“I asked Mum if I could have some drums earlier, I don’t know if she’ll let me though.”

“You did?” The shock in my voice is palpable.

“She said she would see first.”

Crooking my finger, I tell him to come closer.

“Leave it with me, but one bit of good news, you can stay at mine on Friday with Uncle Dale. I have to work though so I won’t be back until later on, is that alright?”

“YEAH! I can’t wait now!”

“Okay. You get some sleep now.”

I kiss his forehead as he snuggles under the duvet and gets comfy.

“Night dude.”

“Night Dad.”

His eyes close as I watch him from the doorway. The fact that I’ve tucked my son into bed doesn’t get past me, a grin plasters itself to my face as I pull the door to a close quietly and head back downstairs.

 

From the hallway you can see right into the kitchen. Cass is standing at the sink doing what looks like washing up. Stepping softly, I walk into the kitchen until I’m standing behind her. I place my hands on her hips, turning her head to the side with a soft smile on her face, they rub up and down her sides before wrapping around her flat but supple stomach and hold her against me.

“We need to talk.” She exclaims.

“Sounds ominous.”

My chin rests on her shoulder.

“Something wrong?” I ask, feeling the deep frown sitting between my eyebrows.

She dries her hands on the towel that’s sitting on the side and turns to me.

“Just a few things on my mind that’s all, I need to do this before anything else.”

Following her into the living room we sit side by side on the couch.

“Okay. What do you see for the future?”

A sigh follows the question that’s obviously been eating at her.

“You, Cameron. A family.”

“Really? And that’s all you need?” She asks me speculatively.

Turning on an angle I take her hand and thread my fingers with hers. “Yes, it is.”

“What if the opportunity came around again like last time? Would you leave again?”

“Nope.”

My determined stare must tell her I’m sure. “I know what I want Cass. I was a mess those first three months. I was a bigger mess after I thought you’d cheated.”

“I didn’t, I swear.”

“Hey, I know that now. I was stupid to think you would or to believe what I’d been told. Aaron tried to say the same thing, but he was joking around, I think. That and my insecurity of being away from you took over. I never settled after. It was nameless women one after another because they weren’t you. You were the one who my heart knew, the one it wanted. No one else ever measured up I just couldn’t bring myself to face you until mum died - I swear it was a message from the grave. She always knew what was best.”

“Yes, she did. I wish I’d let Cameron get to know her properly. I was too scared if I’m honest. I knew my feelings for you had never left and would never change, but I need to know where we go from here. Do we take a chance, be a couple and tell Cameron or do we pretend for his sake? I just don’t know what’s for the best…”

“Right,” he clasps both of my hands in his. “I know what I want. I want you and Cameron, and I want my family. But, you know Cameron much better than me, obviously, so why don’t you sleep on it and let me know what you think and then we can talk.”

Her forehead crinkles with frown lines as she dips her head.

“Do you think you can settle here again?”

“If you’re asking if I think you and my son are enough to keep me grounded - then yes. I’ve done what I wanted to do. I’ll be wherever you are.”

Lifting her head that’s cupped in my hands, I kiss her lips gently, a shuddering breath leaving her.

“Always my girl, whatever happens. Remember that.”

With one last kiss to her forehead, I stand, she looks up at me as her head tips back, her eyes red from unshed tears.

“You look tired, go to bed. I’ll see myself out.” Her timid smile warms me.

Walking to the door, I lift my fingers to my lips kissing them and blow the kiss to her. The tips of her fingers covers her lips catching the kiss. It’s what we used to do when we were kids. A watery smile from behind her fingers presents itself and I walk from the room.

Sitting in my car outside of the house I let my head fall back hitting the headrest, my eyes closing. I need to make her believe me when I say I’m going nowhere, that they are my future.

 

It took a while to go to sleep last night, our conversation was on repeat in my head and after a few hours of psycho-self-analysis, I can see why she’s so insecure about me leaving again. That seems to be the only thing that really stuck out in our conversation. I don’t really hold grudges so the thing with her and my mother I don’t take personally, and I definitely won’t hold it against Cass. There’s been too much time lost for all that bullshit to linger around.

I know what I have to do.

 

After a restless night of tossing and turning and just a few hours’ sleep I remove my hands that are folded behind my head and move out of bed. Pulling the case from under it - this is the first time I’ve opened this since I came back. I take the box from the bag that holds my memories. I head downstairs to find the pliers from the shed and take them back up. Breaking the lock on the box I open it up, all my memories hitting me at once.

Photos, keyrings, notes. A black band catches my attention, picking it up I slide it over my fingers. It’s the same black wristband she gave me years ago, I took it off when I thought we were over. I went back to London, upset but raging on another hand, every single emotion clashing against each other. I ripped it from my wrist and placed it with everything else then locked the box. I threw the key from the twentieth storey window and put the box away not bothering with it again.

That night, I performed on stage, but I was different, harder, no emotion. At the after party, I fucked the first girl that came on to me. I was nineteen, my girlfriend wasn’t mine anymore - I thought fuck it. I dragged her outside and screwed her up a wall, no affection included, no kissing at all. When I was back alone inside my hotel room though, I felt like shit; my life seemed to be falling to pieces around me and all I wanted was Cassidy.

That was the start of the long line of nameless women and I made sure I never fucked the same one twice.

 

Once the band is put back in place I put the notes in the box but leave the photos out. I get on the phone to the nearest florist and have twelve red roses delivered to Cass’s house with a message of ‘Always’ on the card.

Operation ‘Get Cassidy back has begun. Running through my playlists I find the songs I want; I intend on making her remember. I love that woman with every piece of my heart and I’m going to prove it.

The day seems to fly by, my head has been stuck on Cassidy and Cameron until my phone rings. Seeing Cassidy’s name, I answer straight away.

 

“Hey babe.”

“Hi. I need to ask a huge favour. I wouldn’t normally ask but I’m stuck.” Cassidy rambles.

“Go for it.”

“Carson has asked me to go to work and Mum can’t have him, bingo’s more important. So…”

“You want me to look after him?”

“Well, yeah if that’s okay?”

“Oh, yeah, done deal. What time you want me there?”

“Ermm,”

“How about I come to yours around four thirty is that alright?”

“Yes please. Thanks.”

“Cass? Don’t thank me. The answer would always be yes.”

“I had a not so little parcel today; would you know anything about that?”

“Parcel? What was in it?” Playing dumb is probably my speciality. I smile to myself but don’t give anything away in my voice.

“I guess you’ll see it when you come around.”

“Yep I guess I will. See you later.”

Pressing the red icon, I end the call swiftly. She’s going to go mad at me for cutting it short.

 

, Dale pulls up as I’m walking to my car. He gets out with his briefcase in hand and his suit on, really looking the part.

“Hey bro. How you doing?” I ask because he looks a little agitated.

“Shattered! Stupid clients with no brains, it does my head in. Just a bad day. How are you?”

Dale is a petty crimes solicitor. Stealing, fighting, burglary that kind of thing. He always wanted to make Mum proud and do something to help the community and he did.

Never mind Mum, I’m proud of him but I think it gets to him some days.

“I’m good. I’m heading to Cassidy’s, I’m having Cam while she has to work. See you later.”

Getting in my Audi I start the engine and head to my destination.

 

As I pull up, the vase with her red roses are in the front window which makes me smile. At least she didn’t throw them away. Walking up to the front door it opens before I even have the chance to knock.

“Oh hey.”

Cameron runs at me and hugs me.

“Whoa! Good to see you too but I only saw you last night,” I laugh. Bending over I lift him on to my shoulder and carry him inside.

“Mum, look at me!” I turn around, so he can see his Mum.

“Be careful.” She warns.

Turning back around I see that sensible face. The Mum face…

“I’m making a big mistake leaving you two together I can see it now.”

“Don’t be like that, we’ll be fine, won’t we, kid?”

“Yeah! Don’t worry about us. Did you bring your guitar?”

“Of course. Never leave home without it.”

“Cool. I’m going to play FIFA for a bit. Mum call me when it’s ready.” I put his feet on the floor and he runs up the stairs.

“I’ve cooked. Have you eaten?” Cassidy asks.

“No. You’ve cooked for me? You shouldn’t have.” I joke. Her eyebrow arches on a smirk, not able to keep a straight face.

“Shepherd’s Pie…” she sings.

“Is it like my Mum’s?” My eyes narrowing as I wait for the answer.

“Who do you think gave me the recipe years back?”

“Ah, winner!”

Walking further into the small house and seeing as we’re still just inside the door I walk into the front and smirk.

“Nice flowers, who are they from, do you have an admirer?”

She walks to the vase, lifting them to her nose and inhales the aroma.

“Hmm, I love the smell of roses. My favourite flowers too. Whoever it is must know me well…” She sighs with a dreamy look on her face. Smiling I walk towards and stand next to her, bending to and sniffing too.

“They do smell nice. No card?”

“That’s the weird thing it had one word, no name from who sent them, just one word.” She grins nibbling at her lip. picking the card from out of the bunch she hands it to me.

“Always...Strange.”

Stepping closer... “Do you have any idea?” Her big green eyes scrutinising me, waiting for me to tell her exactly what she wants to know.

“None.” My breath getting caught in my throat and my answer coming out as a whisper making my voice sound huskier than normal.

“Well, that’s it then I must have an admirer.” She shrugs and steps back.

“You’re a bad girl Cassidy Summers. Very soon, it’s going to be just you and me and then I’ll show you who can be bad. Mark my words.”

Her eyes widen in excitement and turns from me swishing her long blonde hair around.

“Ah promises, promises, Mr Chase. As I said last night, if you can’t keep them - don’t make them.”

Her lips pucker into a kiss and she goes off into the kitchen.

 

We eat dinner just the three of us around the kitchen table. It’s nice. As the time is getting on, Cass goes off to get changed for work while I clean the kitchen up and wash all the dishes.

“That’s what I like to see, a gorgeous man knowing his place…. at the kitchen sink.”

Twisting sharply to face her, her mouth is twisting to hold back a smirk as she stands at the kitchen door watching me. My hands full of soapy suds I walk towards her.

“Say that again?” I smile creeping closer to her.

“Don’t do it. Elliot, I mean it!”

Her voice rises an octave as I hold my hands up in front of me.

“Do what, Cass.”

“You know what! Just don’t! I know what’s going through that mind of yours.”

She holds my wrists to stop me touching her but that really doesn’t work because I’m much stronger than her. Twisting my hands from her grip, my soap covered palm covers the whole of her face as she squeals.

“Elliott. Nooo! I take it back. I didn’t mean it, I promise.”

She lifts her head, giggling, there’s suds in her hair and her face is wet but she looks adorable and it doesn’t stop me from taking the advantage of stealing a kiss from her.

She wipes her face on a towel and turns to me, throwing it at me.

“I’m now going to work, I’ll see you later. Have fun.”

I catch it in my wet hands and put it back on the side. ” See you later, gorgeous.”

She turns back and smirks before shouting up the stairs to Cameron.

She sashays her sexy arse purposely in front of me giving me the urge to grab it in both hands and squeeze, but she’s out of the door before I can put the plan into action and it’s shutting behind her.

I turn back to the stairs and look upwards.

“Cameron, restart your game I’m coming to kick your butt!”

 

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