Ring, ring… ring, ring… ring, ring…

“Urgh, what is that?” I groan as the noise forces me to wake up. “Is that my phone?”

I glance over to Hector’s bed, but he isn’t there. He has a girlfriend on campus who he occasionally goes to stay with. Typical, I could have invited Lucie back to mine after all. I didn’t want to because it’s all so new and I don’t really know what’s going on between us, but now I wish I had. It would’ve been fun and we could have had another good time in the morning. I get the feeling that was Lucie’s first ever time, and I want to make sure that she had the best time ever. I would like to give her an even better time now.

I push myself into a standing position and I scrabble around for my cell phone. I dropped it somewhere when I got in last night, after messaging Lucie and I don’t know where it went. I kick my clothes around the floor and soon find it tucked under my bed. I moan with dismay when I realize that it’s my dad calling.

What can he want at this early hour? I rack my brains trying to think. What have I done now?

“H… hello?” I answer cautiously while chewing the inside of my mouth. “Dad? Is everything aright.”

There’s a storm cloud on the other end of the phone, I don’t have to be able to see him to hear it. My heart races faster, it’s always hard for me to remember my misgivings when I go through life barely recalling what I do most of the time. I act on impulse, I don’t even think about it. That’s always a nightmare.

“What the fuck is going on, son?” he demands, rage flooding from his mouth. “What is this?”

“Erm…” Oh God, I don’t want to ask, but I’m going to have to. I need to find out. “What do you mean?”

“I have received a letter from the college this morning about your low grades. You’re skipping class and acting like an idiot. I think it’s safe to say that I am not impressed. What the fuck are you doing?”

Is that even legal? What the hell are the college sending my father letters for? I’m a damn adult, surely, I can make my own decisions, even if they’re shitty ones? Then again, he does donate a lot of money to the college so maybe he has extra rights and part of that is putting me under the spotlight without me knowing.

“I… I’ve just been having a good time,” I reply feebly. “I work too, I just want to have fun. That’s all a part of the college experience, isn’t it? I need to… to have a good time now before I start work.”

“You won’t be working for the family business if you don’t get off you ass. You need to work while you’re there. You have to get this qualification or you aren’t going to take over the company at all.”

My heart sinks, I don’t think this is an empty threat. He really sounds serious. He can’t take the family business away from me, that’s all I have. That isn’t just my back up, that’s my sole plan. If he takes it from me I don’t know what I’ll do with my life. I gulp loudly as I try to think of a way out of this.

“I am trying,” I lie. “I might not be at every single class but I think that’s a real exaggeration…”

“It says here that your attendance is twenty two percent. And in the last few months it’s been eight percent.”

Shit, I didn’t realize it had gotten so bad. That’s a shock to even me. “Oh, right, I see, I didn’t think…”

“No, and that’s your problem, you don’t ever think, do you, son? You live this easy going life where nothing comes hard to you and I think you assume I do the same. Just because you don’t see what I do, doesn’t mean I don’t do anything. I work very hard to maintain things, I’m a very busy man and it is a lot of responsibility. How the fuck am I supposed to trust you with this responsibility when you can’t even take care of yourself?”

I’m stunned into silence. I don’t know how to reply to this, it’s a huge shock after I had such a good night with Lucie. I thought I’d be sorting out my personal life today, not my college fuck ups.

“You need to sort this out, today, Kade, I’m not messing about. The letter basically says that you will end up being kicked out of college if you don’t pick things up and I don’t want that shame brought on the family or the business. I think even you can get that through your thick skull. Sort it today!”

As he hangs up the phone, leaving me in a pit of despair, I don’t know what to with myself. This is a mess, I’m going to have to at least make some effort to show my dad that I’m trying. I don’t want him to snatch my future away just because he thinks I can’t hack it. That isn’t the case, I can I just haven’t tried. I thought I could do all my trying when I got into the business. I would get my fun out the way and put my head down.

“Shit,” I mutter while grabbing the nearest clothing to me. “Shit, shit, shit. Oh, fucking hell.”

I need to speak to the teacher, to ask for some help, to try and turn this around. My head is all over the place, I can’t hardly think about anything other than this mess. Once I’m all sorted, then maybe I can relax and worry about other stuff. Everything other than my college work dissolves into nothingness.

I race from the bedroom, slamming the door behind me and I run across to the building where my business teacher has his office. I don’t know how much he likes me, I honestly haven’t spent enough time with him but I’m going to have to do what I can to win him around. Somehow, I’ll have to get his help, I’ll have to try and make him understand my dilemma so that we can find a solution together.

The main problem is I can’t remember his name. Fuck, why can’t I remember his name?

Luckily, I can remember his office and it says his name across the door. ‘Mr. Turner’. I suck in a deep and panicked breath and I lift my hand to knock on the door of doom. It’ll either help me to get the answer that I so desperately need, or my future will be crushed and I don’t know what I will do next.

“Come in,” comes the grave sounding voice from behind the door. That isn’t a good start.

I push the door open and I see the vaguely familiar man in his brown awful suit and scruffy dark hair sitting behind the desk. I don’t know how he can teach business since he doesn’t seem to have any success himself, but there you go. I can’t have that attitude right now because I need him desperately.

“Erm, Sir. Mr. Turner. Do you think I can have a word with you?”

He sits back in his seat and runs his eyes disapprovingly up and down me. “I see. You father got the letter then? You know, we have been trying to communicate with you, but haven’t had any success.”

“You have?” I narrow my eyes in confusion. “How? I haven’t had any missed calls…”

“You do realize that you have a postal box here, don’t you?” Mr. Turner rolls his eyes. “That’s how we’ve been trying to talk to you. That’s how everyone in the college communicates with students.”

“It is?” I cannot believe I didn’t know that. “Really? I’m sorry, I guess I didn’t know.”

“If you ever came to class, you would, but since you think you’re too good for that…”

Okay, so I guess it’s safe to assume that he doesn’t like me at all. I didn’t mean to bring this reaction out of him but I guess that’s what I deserve. Now that I’m thinking about it, I know certain people would die to be here. This college is their first choice and they didn’t get accepted so that I could have a place. And all I’ve done with that is fuck around. That actually sucks a little, I guess I didn’t see it with that.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Turner. I didn’t mean to act the fool, I understand now how stupid I’ve been. I don’t want to fail or get kicked out or whatever. I want to try, I want to do well. I don’t want to be… this.”

Mr. Turner gives me a disapproving look, which I suppose I can understand. He knows that this has only just come on because my dad has yelled at me, but I really do want to make it right. For my dad, but I guess a little bit for myself as well. Maybe I want to prove that I can do this after all.

“Your course work is a problem,” he finally tells me. “But I suppose I can catch you up on that. It’s the exam that’s the problem. It’s coming up next week and you don’t know any of the material. If you fail it, you’ll have to leave the course. There isn’t any way around it. Right now, I don’t know if you’ll even be there. Judging by your record, there’s no chance of you turning up at all. You didn’t even know about it.”

A golf ball of terror lodges in my throat, I don’t know what the hell I’m going to do. I didn’t know about it, I didn’t realize how close I was already to being kicked out. Now I have to learn all kinds of stuff by next week. My brain doesn’t retain information very quickly, so I don’t think I stand a chance.

“I don’t know what to do,” I tell him sadly. “I want to make this right, I want to do the exam, but I don’t know if I can. How can I do it when I don’t know anything? I know that it’s my own fault but now it feels like it’s too late to fix it. You don’t understand, I’m going to lose all my future and everything.”

Mr. Turner softens a little at the sheer desperation in my voice. “I can try to help you,” he tells me. “I will try and help you, but only if you’re going to put one hundred percent in. I’m not putting in my own time and effort if you’re going to sack it off. I want you to succeed, that’s why I keep trying, but I can only do so much.”

“Oh, my goodness, would you?” I beg him desperately. “I will do anything I will do this exam then I’ll catch up on all the work I haven’t done. Anything to make this work. Thank you.”

Mr. Turner stands up and grabs some books off the shelf. “I want you at my lecture at nine AM this morning, then I want you here afterwards for extra tutoring. You’re going to have to read all of this too.”

It’s overwhelming and it means I’m going to have to put everything on hold for a while, but it’s worth it. Everything is hanging on a balance and I need to just get through this. As hard as it is, I can do that. I can get through this week and get this exam done. Everything else will have to come later.

“I will do whatever you want of me. I won’t let you down.”