Brian pulled his shades down over his eyes as soon as they settled in the taxi. The morning sun was nearly blinding after a day of staying in a semi-darkened ship cabin. They packed an overnight bag and hit customs in Nassau as soon as they awakened. They didn’t even take time for breakfast.

He had to get off the ship or he was going to go stir crazy. Their suite was starting to close in. And he’d done everything on board that he wanted to do. All that was left was to drink or fuck. He hadn’t touched a drop of alcohol since the beers in the bar the night before last. He hadn’t been drunk when he’d tackled Zack in the elevator, but he wasn’t proud of that moment.

Zack never said a thing. He let Brian do whatever he wanted. And Brian had done everything short of penetration.

If Zack was straight he had a funny way of showing it. If he wasn’t straight like he said in the bar… then it was because Brian was there confusing the issue for him.

He needed to figure it out for himself.

Like Brian had.

They hadn’t spoken much yesterday, Zack spent most of the day with his nose in a book and Brian had turned on the TV for the very limited programming the ship had. There was no Wi-Fi unless he paid for it. He didn’t need to go online bad enough to pay an exorbitant amount of money for a half an hour of gay porn surfing. And he sure as fuck wasn’t ready to answer messages or check Facebook or Twitter. He didn’t want to know what was going on back home. And he absolutely did not want Zack to know there might be fallout from the wedding that didn’t happen.

Were seven days enough for people to stop talking about it? He knew it was the talk of the town when he left that night. And after talking with his mother back in Mexico he knew there was going to be hell to pay when Ronnie finally turned up and started regretting losing her meal ticket. And he sure as fuck wasn’t ready to face Ronnie.

They didn’t fuck. Not once since they crawled off the floor and into the shower. They called room service for food and slept. Brian had one of the magazines Zack had picked up that night he got shit faced and lost his damned mind. He was all caught up on the music world and had moved on to the other entertainment industries. He knew what summer movies were set to come out. He even read a damned thriller. He hated thrillers. He went through Zack’s bags looking for more reading material when they ran out and found and SW Simpson book that looked very familiar. But they didn’t touch each other.

Why the hell hadn’t they touched each other?

“We’re here,” Zack said, pulling him out of his thoughts. Brian had been chewing on his thumbnail. Zack rested his hand on Brian’s knee to stop it from bouncing.

“That was fast.” Brian looked out the window at the Spanish influenced hotel. It was first class all the way and Brian was dressed in cargo shorts and a surf t-shirt. He wasn’t the slightest bit first class. “We probably could have walked it.”

“And gotten lost?” Zack paid the driver and they got out. They shared one suitcase. They looked like gay lovers on vacation. People stopped to stare as they walked into the lobby. Maybe he looked like some rich man’s rent boy. What the hell was wrong with him? When did he develop such an inferiority complex? He grew up in Buckhead for fucksake.

Stretching, Brian tried to shake off the mental fatigue from the day before. Could be real fatigue. He needed a vacation. He never took time off just to do nothing. Speaking of vacation… “I booked a scuba diving excursion for this afternoon,” he told Zack before they made it to the lobby desk. “I can cancel it if you’d like. We can do something else.”

“No, sounds good. I’m good in water. I’m not sure I can handle another soaring above the trees escapade, but… yeah, let’s go scuba diving. We have until four tomorrow afternoon to do anything you want. That’s why I picked this hotel, it’s right in the middle of everything. We can play tourist or go shopping. The diamonds here are cheap and so is the rum. And there’s a private beach if you want to sit in the sand and do nothing. That was my original plan. Ronnie could go shop and I would sit in the sand and read a book or three. I miss reading for pleasure.”

Zack was chattering away. Almost nervously. He didn’t slow down once they were inside, almost as if he was trying to hurry them through check in. Maybe because he was checking into another honeymoon suite with a man. Fuck.

Brian wondered what this country thought about homosexuals. They were a huge tourist destination, stood to reason that they weren’t going to send out the cops to arrest the queers checking in. But they were getting some long, lingering looks.

“I could go back to the ship. We don’t have to do this.” Brian let his own insecurities slip into his voice. Maybe he wasn’t ready for a grown-up relationship out in public. Maybe he was happy only opening his closet for his close personal friends to peek inside.

Zack stopped and tipped his glasses up to the top of his head while he turned to face Brian. He looked tired. Not nervous. “If you want to go back, we can go back. Either way, I’m good. I don’t want to split up. Unless you want to split up. We’ve been in each other’s hair for… how many days and nights now? I have no idea what today is.”

Brian checked his watch. It was an old analog watch that his grandfather had given him for graduation nearly eight years ago. The date was in a little box at the top. “It’s Saturday. And if you’re checking in then I’m staying.”

Zack stared over the top of his head, his eyes unreadable. He clicked his tongue against his teeth a couple of times. “I could ask for separate rooms or downgrade to something with two beds.”

“No.” Brian rushed to deny the suggestion. “I mean… If you want to. I’m fine sharing.”

Zack swallowed and pressed his lips tight together. He went a little pale too, as he looked around at the people who seemed to have forgotten they existed and were going about their own business. “Okay then. We’re staying.” He turned and started for the desk again. “And sleeping together.”

“Well, okay then.” Brian had a sudden raging need to get checked in and upstairs in a bed to do some sleeping that had nothing to do with actual sleeping.

The gentleman at the desk greeted them and Zack pulled out his ID and credit card. Everything checked out and the gentleman wished the Sorensens a wonderful stay. They followed a bellboy to the elevator in silence. Zack tipped the guy for carrying their one medium-sized travel bag and opening their door. And when the door closed and they were alone, he let out a breath that sounded like a balloon being deflated as he sank into a velvet armchair in their small sitting room. Brian took off his glasses and kicked off his sandals on his way through the room to the balcony. He opened the French doors and stepped out onto a private balcony that took his breath away.

“I could get used to this.” The view beyond was the stuff of fantasy.

He didn’t hear Zack come up behind him. He jumped when Zack snaked an arm around his waist and leaned over his shoulder, his chin jutting into Brian’s collar bone. Brian relaxed and leaned back against him. He dropped his hand to his side and caught Zack’s free hand. “Yeah,” he whispered so softly Brian had to strain to hear. “I could too.”

They stood watching the sailboats drifting along on clear blue water and white puffy clouds skidding across an azure sky, all colliding somewhere over the horizon. His heart beat hard in his chest. He had no idea what to say or think. He didn’t want this to end. He couldn’t stand how much he craved this… fantasy. That’s all this was. A fantasy of the life he never knew he wanted.

“I’m not rich,” Zack said a while later. Brian’s stomach growled. He had no idea what one had to do with the other. Or… wait? What?

Brian stepped away and turned to face his friend. He didn’t want to think there was an implication in the comment. But he couldn’t not think that after saying he could get used to this. “I meant the scenery.”

Zack blinked at him, owl like.

“I’m not after your money, Zack. I’m not playing house right now. I am not interested in you for your money.” He knew he was ruining the moment but Zack had started it.

Zack sighed again and turned to go back inside. His shoulders slumping as if Brian had hurt him. Maybe he had.

“I don’t think that you are, and that’s not what I meant. I would like this kind of life. I’m not rich. This is rich. Beyond what I have. And now… I am so happy you’re here with me, but I wish she’d called this all off before I spent a fortune on this trip.” Zack roamed around the room avoiding the bed.

Ten days in first class and a luxury five-star overnighter sounded right up his sister’s alley. “How much did you spend for this?” He had no business asking, but it was out there and now he had to know.

“For the honeymoon? Twenty grand. Just under fifty when you include the wedding.” Zack found a bottle of champagne in an ice bucket beside a basket full of fruit and other goodies. “Guess this is one of the perks of caviar dreams. Oh god, there’s caviar in here.”

“Caviar? No shit.” Brian had no idea what to say about the money bombshell. He’d known Ronnie had expensive tastes and was looking for a sugar daddy. He just didn’t think Zack was the type to throw money away on something frivolous. He’d also thought his family had paid for the wedding. They’d paid for his older sister’s wedding and it hadn’t been half as grand as what Ronnie had planned.

Zack pulled boxes of foods out of the basket and set them down beside the tin of caviar. Crackers. Cheese. All kinds of fruits including chocolate covered strawberries. “Want some bubbly?” Zack looked at the bottle sitting in the ice bucket with a mild touch of horror in his eyes. “Too early? It’s not five o’clock anywhere.”

“Well, it is five on the west coast.” Brian took the little china plates that were arranged beside the basket and opened everything interesting. He spread caviar on the crackers and loaded the plates with an assortment of goodies for a quick breakfast.

“AM doesn’t count.” Zack pulled the champagne out of the bucket and put it in the small fridge that was hidden in a cabinet. He came back with two bottles of chocolate milk.

“Nice.” Brian grinned at the odd selection. “I’m sure coco moo juice goes well with roe and crackers.”

“Redneck boys from Georgia got no raisin’,” Zack teased, his eyes sparkling as he walked past Brian to the balcony.

“I resemble that remark.” Brian brought the plates and followed him. They settled in the two patio chairs overlooking the beach and fell quiet.

“Me too,” Zack said after drinking half the bottle of milk. “I’d like something simple. A ham biscuit. Some grits maybe. Not sure my stomach is made for the high life.”

Brian slipped a cracker into his mouth. It wasn’t his first rodeo with caviar. He expected the weird salty texture. He chewed and swallowed quickly following it up with a chug of milk. “Yeah, acquired taste my ass.”

They ate the fruits and cheeses and left the caviar alone. A breeze blew the curtains from the side railings. A cloud skidded across the sun. Seagulls danced on the air.

“If she wanted my money, why did she plan all this and then leave before she could legally take it?” Zack wasn’t ready to just let it go it seemed. If Brian was in his shoes, maybe he’d feel the same. They would have married last Saturday. Just a week had passed. They would be the ones sitting here. Probably naked. Having sex. On this balcony. Made for a private… Brian pushed the plate of food away. His stomach churning with anger and guilt.

“Did she know you aren’t rich? I mean, if I ask would you tell me what you mean by that. Not that I’m planning to pick your pocket.”

“I didn’t think you were.” Zack sounded angry now. Or hurt. “Money doesn’t mean anything to you. I’ve known that for years. You walked away from everything to pursue your passion. I envy that. And hate it too, because you left me behind… I…” He drank the last of his milk and let the silence stretch on until Brian thought he was finished. “My grandparents left me a million dollars. Most of it from my parents’ life insurance. Some of it was interest from the years the money sat in a bank account waiting for me to hit twenty-one. Then they left me a second policy and their estate. Medical school is damned expensive, but I’m not in debt. And I bought the house outright. I have enough money left to live comfortably while I serve my residency. That’s it. This is not me. It’s not something I want in life.”

Brian mulled that over for a while, drinking his milk and letting the humid air lull him into a stupor. “How about a beach house on the California coast. It’s not much, but it’s nice. Rent is decent, comes with the job.” He didn’t know why he asked. Zack had come west to see him once when he was still living in an apartment in town that wasn’t much bigger than his mother’s walk-in closet.

“Sounds lovely, actually. Will there be ham biscuits and grits?” Zack’s fingers grazed the back of his hand. Brian didn’t jump, he turned his hand and let their fingers tangle like that morning a few days back. This morning there were no bigoted opinions to make him pull away.

“We’ll have to stock up on grits before we leave Georgia, or find a place online that ships them. I can cook a decent biscuit when I’m in the mood for the taste of home.”

“Why did you really leave? If you miss home so much, I mean.” Zack asked, the question ending in a yawn.

“My dad kicked me out and cut me off,” he answered truthfully for the first time since it happened.

Zack sat up and turned to stare at him, the yawning forgotten. “What? Why? Why didn’t you ever tell me?... Because you’re gay?”

Brian pressed his lips together and stared straight ahead. He didn’t want to dredge up the past. He nodded once and let go of Zack’s hand. “Something like that. Let’s go out. Let’s go walk around. I need to feel land under my feet. I need to see something that isn’t water moving or four walls. I need to go do something.”

He was already at the door to the corridor when Zack caught up. They didn’t speak in the elevator. Zack went to the concierge desk and came back with a handful of maps and brochures for attractions. Brian covered his eyes with his sunglasses and reached for one of the maps. He came up with Zack’s hand instead. Nobody blinked as they walked out into the world like lovers.