“Whatcha doin’?” Brian heard the sleep-slurred words coming from inside the stateroom.

“Sitting on the balcony looking over our itinerary for the day and watching the sun rise over the Caribbean.” Brian loved this time of morning. He was always up with the roosters and out of the house before the sun rose. This was nice, just sitting on a balcony sipping coffee and watching the world catch fire. “This view is amazing.”

Zack’s snort sounded muffled. He never was a morning person, not even when they were kids. Not for the first time, Brian wondered how his friend had made it through medical school when he wasn’t there to wake him up and get him out of the apartment.

“So, what are we doing today?” Apparently, Zack hadn’t gone back to sleep after all. “I let Ron… your sister, plan the trip, I just bought the tickets.”

“Well, you have a couple’s spa this afternoon, and that’s about it. We’re at sea today, according to the ship’s itinerary. There are shows throughout the day. And all kinds of things to do. There’s a gym and a track. I might go for a run. The pool opens at nine. The casino too. They have an Imax on this boat. Dude. Hell, the movie sucks. Want some breakfast? I could order room service again. Or we could go up to the never-ending buffet and then explore the ship.” Snores from the bed were his only answer. “I take that as a maybe later.”

Brian finished his coffee and went inside to find Zack sprawled across the bed as if he’d tried to get up but failed. His boxers were tugged down over one hip, exposing half an ass cheek. Brian allowed himself a moment to ogle his friend. He looked the same as he always did. Big, blond, exhausted. He’d killed himself in school to get into medical school. He didn’t sleep enough. He ate shitty food. He didn’t take care of himself. Brian resisted the urge to stroke his friend’s cheek.

“What are you staring at?” Zack mumbled, his jaw barely moved. He cracked one blue eye to peek out at Brian.

“You, you gorgeous hunk of manhood you,” Brian said and Zack snorted.

“For a fat ass,” he said, breaking Brian’s heart. Zack had fought his weight all his life.

Brian gently slapped the firm round body part in question. “Looks fine to me,” he said, leaning over his friend when Zack grunted a denial and kissed the cheek where he’d just slapped. “Go back to sleep, Zack, I’m going for a run.”

Zack smiled and closed his eyes as he sighed, “M’kay, baby, have fun.”

They’d goofed on each other like that forever. Brian didn’t know why that simple endearment that he’d heard so many times before suddenly hurt like fucking hell.

“When I get back, I’m dragging your ass out of bed and we’re getting out of this room. Thought I’d warn you.” Brian grabbed his phone from the desk and started for the door. He looked back in time to see Zack roll over, the motion, dragging the saggy boxers down even further. No, Zack wasn’t fat, not anymore, but he wasn’t slim either, and neither was his dick. The dick Brian had admired most of his life seemed happy to see him, it rose out of the nest of blond hair almost as if it were begging him for a good morning kiss. Zack snored that soft, breathy snore, he’d always had. Well, Zack’s dick might be awake and happy to see him but Zack wasn’t.

“Fucking hell,” Brian muttered under his breath. He had to get out of that room or do something stupid… like help his friend lose that virginity he claimed to have.

“Good morning, Doctor Sorensen” He was greeted by a woman in ship’s uniform. She smiled brightly at him as he closed the door and made sure it was locked.

“It’s Mister O’Daly, Doctor Sorensen is sleeping in,” Brian said, needing to clear that up now before it caused Zack more distress. He didn’t go so far as to put to rest the assumption that they were on their honeymoon.

Why? He was on the third lap around the ship’s track when he thought about the greeting again. He was mostly alone, just a few other early risers were out, but most of them were in the gym on the treadmills or stair climbers. Why hadn’t he bothered correcting any of the assumptions? And there’d been more than one since he boarded the ship. Never once had one of the staff assigned to their hall asked about Veronica O’Daly who would have been on the manifest. It was assumed they were both men. And in the honeymoon suite. Sharing a bed.

He’d been intimate with Zack’s dick on many occasions, but that never went anywhere but a helping hand when they were both willing to touch and be touched. Hell, aside from that peck on the ass cheek he'd never even kissed the man, as much as he’d wanted to since he was old enough to know that he liked guys instead of girls. That he liked Zack. But Zack only had eyes for fucking Veronica.

He didn’t notice the sprinkle of rain until that sprinkle turned into a downpour. He stopped running when lightning drove him inside. He checked the time on his phone, he’d been out for more than an hour and he was still just as confused as before he’d started running. Usually, running helped clear his head.

Not today, apparently.

“Would you like a towel, Mister O’Daly?” The gym attendant startled him out of his brooding thoughts. She held out a towel for him with a smile plastered on her face.

“Jesus, is there a sign on my head with my name on it? How the hell do you people know who I am?” He almost shouted at the poor woman. She stepped back a step, but the towel was still held out to him.

“You signed in to use the facilities, remember?” She plastered on a smile even though she had to be thinking he was a nut job.

“Oh, shi… er… sorry, crap.” He winced, trying not to feel like a fool. “I completely forgot.”

“You seemed distracted, and you were concentrating pretty hard out there, it’s been raining for more than half an hour and you didn’t seem to notice.” She smiled a real smile this time and Brian took the towel. He was soaked to the skin and starting to shiver in the air conditioning.

“Yeah, sorry, I work outside, a little rain doesn’t bother me. I, uh, jet lag. I have jet lag,” he lied and he didn’t know why.

“First day, there’s a lot of that going around. Anyway, can I get you anything?” She looked him up and down in a way that should have flattered him if he were straight. Still, she was a pretty girl and he wasn’t a complete asshole.

“No, I’m good. I’m going to go back to my room and shower, wake up Zack and drag him out for breakfast.” Her smile faded just like that. He must have put his room number on the sign-in sheet.

“Oh, well, come back soon,” she said and she went off to offer help to someone else.

Brian dried off and left the towel in a basket. He nodded to the desk jockey at the entrance on his way back to the elevator that would take him right back to Zack.

Thankfully, the corridor on his level was empty and he didn’t have to have one more uncomfortable run-in with someone thinking he was something he wasn’t. Married. Hell, he didn’t wear any jewelry much less a wedding band. He let himself into the room and started stripping his wet running clothes off. He stopped halfway to the bathroom noticing the absence of the big almost naked man and the sound of the shower simultaneously.

Zack had left the balcony and bathroom doors open and the room was humid. Almost like sex humid, but without the pleasant afterglow.

He kicked off his shoes by the bed and tugged his shorts down. Tossing the wet things on the back of a chair to dry, he walked into the bathroom as if he did this every day. Zack leaned against the wall under the steaming jets, his arm working furiously. Brian almost moaned, his dick woke up and took notice. “Leave me some hot water, will you,” Brian said loudly to be heard over the sound of the shower.

Predictably, Zack’s arm stopped mid-stroke and he turned around, quickly, guiltily, and beautifully aroused. He wouldn’t meet Brian’s gaze.

“Need some help reaching your back?” Brian offered, waiting for Zack to do what he always did when they found themselves in this predicament. He looked up slowly, and meeting Brian’s gaze finally, he nodded. God, Brian wished he’d just ask for it. There was no shame in a straight guy getting off with a friend. Of course, Brian could be the one to offer something beyond an awkward back scrub that always ended in a mutual jerk session.

Maybe one day.

He stepped into the huge shower area and took the soap in hand. “Turn around,” he said, because it made things easier. He rubbed the soap into Zack’s broad shoulders with his hands, resisting the strong urge to rub his body into the soapy expanse of beautiful man. Zack held on to the wall with both hands, his head thrown back as Brian hit tender spots with his nimble fingers.

“You should have been a masseuse,” Zack said, groaning with pleasure from just Brian’s hands on his back. “God, I miss your hands on me.”

Brian could hear longing in his friend’s voice. They’d played this game since they were kids, and that was the first time he’d ever heard Zack sound… lonely. So, he sounds lonely? Don’t read anything into it.

“All you have to do is ask.” Brian hoped his voice sounded normal as if he was goofing around like they’d always done before. He wasn’t goofing, not this time. He wanted Zack. He wanted to drop to his knees and make Zack forget all about the woman who’d never been faithful to him. “Spread your feet apart,” he said instead, taking their play to a level he’d never dared before. Zack complied and Brian worked his soapy hands down his back to his ass.

He massaged the lather into Zack’s hips and over his glutes and down the back of his thighs. Zack leaned over hiding his face in the crook of an elbow as Brian swished soap between his legs and up the inside of his powerful thighs. He let his finger casually graze Zack’s ball-sack just to hear the man moan. He increased pressure there until Zack pushed back against him. Pushing his ass crack into the ridge of Brian’s dick. His hard-as-fucking-hell-dick that wanted so much more than just a hand job in the shower.

Zack must have felt the difference in their play. This time, Brian had gone past the bro-job as they’d called it so many times right to foreplay. He was fucking going to go fucking nuts if he didn’t get laid soon.

Zack whirled around, he looked startled and excited and ashamed all at once. His dick was damn near purple with need. And Brian fought his instincts. He wouldn’t drop to his knees and suck his friend off no matter how much they both needed it.

Instead, he held up his soapy hands as if he’d done something wrong. Zack seemed on the verge of some kind of break. “Do you want me to get out?” Brian asked softly so he didn’t startle his friend. “I can get out. We don’t have to do this.”

Zack nodded, he looked like a lost baby giant, almost dangerous and a little cuddly. Brian loved him when he looked cuddly. He’d do anything for cuddly Zack. Hell, he’d do anything for drunk and angry Zack, or distracted and stressed Zack, or any Zack that he’d ever known as long as it was Zack. But he wouldn’t push Zack to do something he didn’t want to. He wasn’t a fucking rapist.

He rinsed his hands under the shower and started to turn away. Zack reached out for him and wrapped his big hand around Brian’s straining erection. He’d never done that before, Brian realized. He’d never been the first to go that far, he’d always waited until Brian had him on the verge of orgasm to reciprocate and one or two tugs on his dick was all Brian would need by then. Right now, he needed more than just a couple minutes.

“Looks like you need this as much as I do,” Zack said, taking the soap from him, and pulling him back under the shower.

Brian reached for the wall to keep his balance. He couldn’t use Zack even though he desperately wanted to. “Yeah,” he agreed. “I’m… need… fuck, Zack, your hand feels so fucking good on me.” He couldn’t stop the groan from escaping. He couldn’t help arching his hips to meet the motion of Zack’s hand. “Fuck, give me the soap back.”

Zack laughed almost in his ear and Brian yelped when Zack’s other big paw slipped between his legs, soaping his balls much the same way Brian had done for him just a couple moments before. And soaping beyond, over his asshole, which wanted so much more than a cake of soap licking across it. “Payback, motherfucker,” Zack whispered in his ear as he stroked Brian’s dick with one hand and his asshole with the other. Brian felt his spine disintegrate and held onto Zack’s broad shoulders as if the world would fall out from under his feet while he came, so fucking hard.

“That was… hot,” Zack whispered in his ear, his hands still rubbing Brian in places that were quickly becoming tender to the touch. He didn’t seem to notice, or mind, that Brian was essentially hanging off him. “I think I came just watching you. I don’t think I’ve ever come like that before.”

Brian let his hand slip down Zack’s slick body to grab the part of him that was still hard, but was coated in cum, hell, he still dripped cum he was so turned on. “You need more?” Brian hummed in Zack’s ear. He wasn’t really asking. He knew his baby needed more. Zack always needed more than one orgasm. He stroked Zack with firm fingers while Zack pushed him against the wall and held him there. He wrapped his big arms around Brian’s waist and held him against his body. His hips pumped into Brian’s hand, slowly, as if he were in no real hurry.

Brian wanted to wrap his legs around the man and let Zack take him hard against the wall. He lifted one leg and hooked it over Zack’s thigh as Zack pressed into him. Rutting against him, until their bodies were pressed so tightly together they were rubbing into the slick heat of the other. His hand no longer needed as Zack’s dick found Brian’s, Brian clenched his fingers into Zack’s hip and tried not to cry out how much he wanted this and so much more as they slid against each other under the shower.

Zack groaned in his ear, the sound almost animal as his big hands gripped Brian’s ass and lifted him off the floor. He wrapped his arms around Zack’s shoulders and his other leg behind Zack’s knee and held on while Zack fucked him into the fucking wall. “Oh, fuck, Brian, I’m going to come.” Zack sounded broken, as if he was on the verge of shattering, body as well as soul.

“Me too, Zack,” was all he could breathe out between hot gasps as his body shook apart. “God, fucking… feels so good.” He cried out when Zack shoved his groin into him pinning him to the wall. He couldn’t stop the orgasm now if he tried.

Zack gazed into his eyes, the blue pits fucking beautiful as he came hard against Brian there in the shower. As if they were lovers. As if this wasn’t fucked the hell up.

When it was over, Zack set him gently onto the floor, and turned away to look for the soap he’d dropped. When he finished washing, he handed Brian the soap and left him in the shower without another word.

Zack was dressed in a pair of khaki pants, with cuffs at the ankles, and a blue button-down shirt. He looked perfectly Doctor Sorensen like. And nothing like the Zack, who’d just ravaged him in the shower. He looked as if nothing had happened.

But that was the way it always was afterward, when Zack got off and Brian lost another little piece of his heart to his straight friend.

Sometimes, like now, Brian hated his friend.