Chapter Fifteen
Noah
Why was I doing this?
I dropped the cleaning rag into the wash before turning to look how spotless my kitchen was now. Not once had I ever cared about what a female thought about my living arrangements. They never stayed long enough to actually see what it was like. I’d never invited them to stay with me overnight.
Rubbing at the back of my neck, I tried to shrug out the tension in my shoulders and neck. It was impossible to not think of this as an opportunity to live out the fantasies I’d had swirling about in my head for weeks now. I would go insane if I didn’t find some sort of relief sooner or later.
My phone buzzed in my back pocket. I glanced down at the caller ID and hesitated when I recognized Hunter’s number. There was no doubt in my head if I answered, he would figure something was up. I was going against my better judgment inviting Iris to stay here, and I didn’t want to hear it from someone else.
I let it go to voicemail before double checking that the guest room had plenty of blankets. The frigid temperatures outside threatened to seep through the windows and doors. It was impossible not to feel the cold no matter where I went in the house.
It was possible that Iris wouldn’t even show up. She had hesitated quite a bit before accepting my offer. I still had a hard time believing that she truly had nowhere to go. The faint knock on the front door dashed away all those doubts. The fire that had been smoldering in my lower belly since inviting her to stay with me sparked instantly at the noise.
Frigid air swept over me fast along with a flurry of fresh snowflakes when I opened the door. A few were trapped in the naturally wavy strands of Iris’ hair as she stood nervously on the front doorstep, bags on the ground at her side. Her hair was damp, as though she had just taken a shower before driving here, and the fresh smell of soap washed over me. She was clean, fresh, and I let my eyes run over the curves of her hips and thighs, wondering if she had cleaned up for me.
It was so incredibly tempting to take her just right there and then. I wanted to kiss those ruby-colored lips to see if the tasted sweet as I imagined. I wanted to run my hands down that perky backside. I just wanted to bury myself in her.
A few seconds passed with the snow blowing into my living room. Iris finally cleared her throat as she gazed at me nervously, fiddling with her purse strap.
“Is it okay if I come in?” she asked, voice tense with the same nerves I felt. We were both toeing a very thin line between wrong and right. She knew it just as well as I did.
I cleared my head of those images of Iris beneath me in the bed sheets. I took a step back, flourishing a hand for her to come one. “Yeah, come in before you freeze to death out there. This winter storm is really bringing down the snow.”
She reached for her bags, but I grabbed them first. Our hands brushed, and a jolt went up my arm at the softness of her fingers. Chewing on the pad of her thumb, a nervous gesture I’d noticed she did way too much, Iris looked around the living room with an impressed smile.
“You have a nice house,” she said. “I half-expected it to be filled with rugby things and mismatched furniture.”
I set her bags near the front door with a chuckle. “Not me,” I said, closing the front door. “I can’t stand mismatched furniture.”
“I noticed,” she said wryly.
I showed her to the guest room, setting her bags down on the ground next to the bed. Iris looked around the room in interest while I forced myself to keep distance from her and the bed. I hardened slightly when she ran a hand over the blanket spread out across the bed with a smile that showed off her straight teeth. She looked up to meet my eyes. Something lingered there, but it was gone before I could even read it.
My skin felt too tight and hot.
“You’re probably starving,” I stated, turning to go back to the kitchen to distract myself. “I noticed that the dining hall was closed early today because no one was at school.”
“The staff wanted to get home before the snow storm,” she said. “Everyone was surprised how fast this spring storm came.”
She followed me down the hallway to the kitchen and perched herself on the breakfast stool while I seasoned a package of chicken wings.
“I bet your roommate is enjoying Hawaii,” I said. “Nice, warm beaches sound good about right now.”
With you in a bikini. My mouth went dry at the thought. Unlike some of the girls who dressed rather revealing at times, too revealing, in my opinion, Iris’ sense of fashion always stayed the same. I barely saw any skin expect on the rare occasion she wore a short-sleeved shirt that showed off her slender arms.
She rolled her eyes. “Yes, she made quite a deal rubbing it in my face when we were packing up our apartment before it was fumigated.”
I placed the chicken wings in the oven and set the time. “What’s the deal between the two of you? I get the feeling that the two you aren’t the greatest friends.”
“We aren’t,” she said, sighing. “I don’t even know how we ended up roommates. I think we both are jealous of one another.”
“Ah, so a frenemy type of friendship then?”
“That’s a good way to describe it.”
The smell of baked chicken and salt began to fill the kitchen. I couldn’t help but admire the way the kitchen lights reflected in the shiny strands of Iris’ hair.
“Why do you live with her if you two don’t like each other?” I asked. “Or does this go back to not having anywhere to go?”
Even though she was sitting in my home, I still found it hard to believe that Iris had nowhere else to go. My parents, as dysfunctional as they were, still always had a room for me. I watched the expression on her face darken slightly.
“It’s not that simple,” she said, looking down at the countertop. “I only have a few months left anyway before graduation. I won’t have to worry about it anymore.”
The pit of my stomach twisted at the reminder that Iris and I were on completely two different phases of our lives. I had gone through my post college days already and settled down, but it was just beginning for her. She wanted to leave Utah and never look back. That much she had made clear.
Her reasons to leave were deeper than having a fake friendship with Bailey. It was the same reason why she ended up staying here with me. I let it go, though, when I sensed Iris’ defenses building up again.
“Have you figured out what you are going to do once you graduate?” I asked.
“Maybe go to New York,” she replied, shrugging her shoulders. “I’m just keeping my options open at this point.” Her eyes suddenly widened, and she pointed to the oven behind me frantically. “Noah! The oven!”
I whirled around to find black smoke curling from the oven along with orange flames along the bottom. I let out a string of curse words at the sight of it while Iris darted around the counter to help me pull the now-blackened chicken wings out. She rummaged through the cabinet next to me before opening a bottle of salt and tossing it onto the flames. The flames flickered out and black smoke filled the kitchen.
Iris burst out laughing, deep belly laughs that brought me into my own laughter. We opened the kitchen windows to let the smoke out.
“I’m not a cook,” I admitted, rubbing at my face in embarrassment. “Obviously.”
“Obviously,” she agreed with a giggle. “It’s nice to know that you aren’t so perfect all the time.”
I grabbed my phone and scrolled through my contacts until I landed on pizza. “Far from perfect,” I said. “I’ll order us a pizza.”
“Sounds good to me.”
An hour and a half later, I wiped my fingers free of grease and pizza sauce while Iris picked up the pizza boxes. I sunk back into the couch pillows with a contented sigh. I couldn’t remember the last time I had ever enjoyed a woman’s company as much as I was enjoying hers. Her guard was down for once, something that I thoroughly enjoyed.
“I have to ask you a question,” I said when Iris sat back down on the couch, folding a leg casually under as she faced me. “It’s personal, but I have to ask why you told me there was no one around to help you for spring break.”
“There isn’t,” she said flatly. She looked down at the couch cushions between us for a moment. “I could go to my mom’s house, but…”
“But?” I prompted gently.
“My mom’s an alcoholic,” she blurted out, wincing. “I hate that word, but that’s what she is. My parents are in the middle of a divorce, so my mom deals with it by drinking. Every time I go to her house, I end up having to clean and take care of her. It’s never relaxing.”
“That’s hard.” I really didn’t know what else to say. It made perfect sense then why Iris didn’t want to go home for spring break. I wouldn’t want to, either. “My parents are divorced, too. Been divorced for a while, actually.”
“It sucks. You get stuck in between them, or without one of them, even as an adult.”
“Pretty much. That’s why I went to New Zealand – to get away from them.”
“I wish I could go to a foreign country.” Iris sighed tiredly. “That’s why I failed freshman English, you know. Not because I was lazy or whatever. I had to constantly drive over to my parents’ house to deal with my mother’s drinking because she couldn’t handle my dad anymore.”
Fuck. I didn’t realize that had been the reason why Iris had failed the first time. Guilt lodged in my throat.
“I’m sorry, Iris,” I said. “I didn’t know. I acted like a complete dick about it.”
The corner of her lips turned upward. “Not as much as Professor Smith did. He told me it was a lesson – that I shouldn’t try to rescue my own family because my life is important.”
“I can’t say that’s not entirely wrong of him to say that,” I said. “You can’t save people who don’t want to be saved.”
“I know. I realize that now.”
A tendril of wavy hair fell across her cheekbone. I reached forward without thinking to tuck it back behind her ear gently. Iris tensed under the unexpected touch, but her eyes slipped closed with a small sigh.
The noise made me lean forward ever so slightly as I traced the rim of her ear with my fingertips. God, she was so beautiful, and melting under a simple touch. It made me wonder how she’d respond to other more sensual touches.
She shifted unexpectedly out from beneath my fingers. I allowed my hand to drop between us when she looked up at me with watery eyes.
“I better get to bed,” she said. “Do you mind?”
I cleared my throat and shifted off the couch to hide how aroused I had become by that simple contact. There was no way I would sleep tonight knowing Iris was in the room down the hallway.
“No problem. I should get some sleep, too.”
Iris waited in the hallway while I clicked the lights off in the living room. I glanced at the clock when I passed it, sighing inwardly at the time. 10:14. I never went to bed before midnight, but a shower screamed my name. I needed release.
We stood outside the guest room door in the dark hallway. My hand twitched in temptation to reach out and grab her, but she stepped away into the guest room. I curled my hands into fists and tucked them behind my back.
“If you need anything, I’ll be in my room,” I said. “Make yourself comfortable. Don’t be shy, either.”
The moonlight streamed in through the guest window. I barely saw the smile on her lips before she slowly closed the door with a whispered goodnight. I walked stiffly down the hallway to my room, slipping out of my shirt when I closed the door. A hot shower sounded better with each passing moment.
I paused when I realized I had forgotten to tell Iris where to go if she wanted to take a shower. The cold air caused the skin on my chest to pimple. I grabbed my shirt from the ground and opened the door to find her standing on the other side. I stiffened in surprise to see her standing there nervously.
“Iris?” I questioned, softly. “You okay?”
“Yes.”
The whisper caressed over me. I caught sight of the blaze in Iris’ eyes – a long awaited blaze that instantly set me on fire, too. Her eyes raked over my chest, leaving fiery trails in their wake.
A small voice screamed in the back of my head to shut the door, to tell her to go back to her room, but that voice was rendered mute the second her dainty hands reached up to touch the side of my neck.
I kissed her. I kissed her so deeply that a moan escaped her lips when I licked at them, begging to taste her. Fire shot up my spine when her tongue tentatively met mine and then quickly grew aggressive in a bold dance between our tongues. She tasted wonderful with faints hints of pizza, and I loved it.
My hands found the curve of her waist through the dark. A groan escaped my own lips when I felt her soft body press up against mine, yielding to the passion growing between us. Her teeth hooked onto my lower lip and gave a small tug. I growled in response.
“Hold on,” she said breathlessly. She pulled back ever so slightly, her hands still clutching the side of my neck. “I have to tell you something before we…”
“What is it?” I asked, trying to keep my patience. My body ached to be touched, for a certain organ to bury itself into her sweet warmth.
She bit her lower lip. It took all my self-control to not lean in and bite it myself.
“I-I-I’ve never been with someone before,” she said, softly.
I blinked in surprise. “You haven’t?”
“No.”
I stared down at her, standing on her tip toes to kiss me and look up into my eyes. She looked torn between desire and fear. I knew I wouldn’t be able to live with myself knowing I took away something she didn’t feel ready to give, but damn she kissed like she knew her way around a bedroom.
Reaching up to gently clasp her wrists, I pulled them from my neck, and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. She shivered visibly under the touch.
“If you aren’t ready-” I started.
“I am. I am ready.”
“Are you sure?” I looked at her intently, looking for some sort hesitance. I found nothing – nothing but desire.
Her hands slipped from mine, and I stumbled back into my room when Iris gave me a little shove on the shoulders. I opened my mouth to question again if this was really what she wanted, but words failed me when she shut the bedroom door with a resolute click.
She stood before me in the moonlight before her hands slowly went to the hemline of her shirt. She lifted the fabric to reveal a flat stomach, and the rest of the world faded away. All I knew at that moment was the moonlight playing softly on Iris’ skin.