She’s driving me fucking crazy. How can one woman—a petite scrap of a woman at that—make me act all caveman and shit. Fuck me.
First, I turn my head around for one second and a guy’s already trying to get into her pants, so what do I go and do? I fuckin’ kiss her. I taste her, and she tastes fuckin’ amazing. I thought I just needed one kiss to get her out of my system, but little did that do—if anything I want her even more, don’t give a fuck she has another guy’s baby inside her. I feel this insane need to own her, body and soul, and I’ve only just met her.
Now I get it, how Quill went mad for Jasmine, and Hawke for Luisa. I mean I thought I felt love for Jasmine, and I still carry her in my heart, but what I’m feeling for Charity is something new, something I’ve never felt before. It’s as if I need to carry her over my shoulder and lock her in my room so nobody else can have her.
What the fuck am I thinking? She’s running away because her man laid his hands on her, raped her from what I hear. The last thing she needs right now is another man trying to own her. But I just can’t help what I’m feeling, and she tests me, I know she does, like she did at the table when she ordered her food. And now I catch her on the back of Bear’s bike? Another fucking test, I’m sure. But no fucking way am I’m going to allow her to be up close to Bear like that. I don’t care if her arms around him are needed to stop her from falling off—I don’t want those arms to be around any other man but me. She thinks I don’t know what she’s playin’ at, but I know she’s trying to get me back for tellin’ her it was a mistake to kiss her. The words sounded bitter in my mouth when I spat them out, because it was a lie. A lie I tried desperately to convince myself of but failed to do so.
With red-hot anger searing through me, I dump her ass on the back of my bike and get in her space. “You’d better shut the fuck up and put that helmet on your sweet head, before I bend you over this bike and give you the spanking you deserve.” My hand twitches at the thought of my hand on her ass.
Her eyes widen. “You wouldn’t dare?”
“Wouldn’t I? Don’t test me, Char. I’m a man that keeps his word.”
She stills and looks the other way. She’s obviously trying to ignore me, despite the fact I’m right in front of her, but even though she’s stiff as a corpse I check that the strap on her helmet is done up securely. I don’t care. She’ll stay on the back of my bike, and that’s final.
“Everything okay here?”
I turn to face Hazel, who has a concerned look on her face. “Yeah, sis, everything’s fine.”
“Can I have a word with you?”
“What now?” I ask, looking down at my watch on my wrist.
“Yeah, now, Kane.” She’s pissed.
I sigh and meet Hazel’s eyes. “Sure.”
Hazel looks over at Charity, who’s still looking away, and walks a few feet away.
I follow her and push my hands into the front pockets of my jeans. “What’s up?”
“Why are you being such an asshole to Charity?” Hazel says straight up. “She’s been through enough, don’t you think? She certainly doesn’t need you manhandling her.”
I look down at the bitumen and kick at a stone near my foot.
“Kane, look at me,” Hazel continues, her voice gentler now.
I do and try hard as fuck to think of a reason why I am, indeed, acting like an asshole. I can’t exactly say to my sister it’s because I fuckin’ want her best friend, though. Don’t want any other man’s hands on her, or hers on anyone else but me.
“You like her, don’t you?”
Fuck. I snap my head up to meet Hazel’s eyes, and notice she’s smiling. I roll my eyes. “Don’t be fucking creating some fantasy notion about me and Charity. I’m doing this for you, remember?”
“Yeah, sure you are. Is that why you couldn’t handle her being on the back of Bear’s bike?”
My sister is too fuckin’ smart for my liking. I love Hazel, she’s my only family and I’m damn proud of her—and it kills me to lie to her—but I can’t tell her that yes, I like Charity, I want her, and I don’t want any other man to look her way. She’ll think I’m crazy and shit, and to be honest, I’m not ready to admit any feelings just yet.
“Look, Hazel, let’s hit the road. We have a long ride ahead of us and I don’t like us wasting time out here. If Blake is looking for her, then we need to get her to the clubhouse, and pronto.”
Hazel sighs loudly. “Okay, I get it, you don’t want to talk about it. But be nice to her, okay? She’s my friend.”
Hazel leans in and gives me a kiss on my cheek then pulls me in for a hug. I embrace her back and kiss the top of her head, loving the way her brown hair smells. It brings back memories of us as kids. “Love you, brother,” she whispers into my chest.
“Love you back, sis.” I pull back and look down at her. “I promise I’ll try and be nice.”
She smirks. “That’s my Kane.”
I laugh then turn around to walk back to my bike. Charity still sits there, stiff as hell on the leather seat, but I know her eyes are on me; I can feel them.
Once I’m back beside the bike, a sense of guilt washes over me. I just manhandled a pregnant woman, and one that’s already been through enough.
“Take your helmet off,” I say gruffly.
“What?” she asks, her voice muffled by the helmet.
I unclasp the chin strap and pull it gently from her head. Her blue eyes look deep into mine, and I’m sure she can see right through to my soul. She’s still pissed, though. Her flushed face, glittering stare, and creased forehead prove that.
I sit on my bike, facing her. “Look, Charity, I’m sorry about… you know…. About….”
“About how you just picked me up and carried me over your shoulder like a crazy person?”
Crazy about her! “Yeah, something like that,” I admit, scratching my scruffy jaw. I smile at her then and cup her cheek. Her face softens at my touch, and it’s taking everything in me to hold back from kissing her. Her silken hair feels amazing through my fingers, and I imagine what it would look like if she was sprawled out naked on my bed. Shaking my head to get rid of that thought, I say, “I’m sorry for treating you like that, it won’t happen again.”
“Which part?” she asks, her eyebrows raising slightly.
I frown. “What do you mean?”
“I mean the part about you kissing me and basically dry humping me, or the part where you carried me over your shoulder?”
Tilting my head, I think on her words. I can’t guarantee that I won’t kiss those sweet lips again, but I can definitely assure her I won’t manhandle her again.
“Let’s just leave it, shall we?”
She puffs out a breath and mutters, “Figures.”
I remove my hand from her cheek. “What was it you figured?”
“The fact that you can’t admit how much you want me—which is just as much as I want you.”
I feel a rush of warmth run through my veins at her admission, and my cock throbs with an urgent need for her. She wants me. Fuck! How am I supposed to forget those words?
She bites down on her bottom lip and inches closer to me. I suck in a breath; her nearness is too much. “Charity… this can’t happen,” I say, flicking my finger between our bodies.
“It can’t, or you won’t let it?” she responds, her eyes now on my lips.
Again, she moves another inch closer. Out of the corner of my eye I see Hazel talking to Tracker, and Bear is distracted talking on his phone.
“It can’t,” I state again, feeling the breath hitch at the back of my throat.
“You’re a coward,” she whispers, looking straight at me when she delivers that punch.
I straighten. “A coward? Why? Because I don’t want to fuck a woman who’s been through a lot recently, and who must be scared out of her mind to be running away with her friend, not caring that’s she’s running to an MC ?” Her eyes shine with unshed tears, but I continue. “You don’t want me, you’re just looking for someone to comfort you and look after you. Well, I’m tellin’ you now, that ain’t me. I’ll help you, get you to a safe house, but that’s it. You’re right on one thing, though. I may want you—fuck, how could any man not want you, you’re fucking beautiful—but you deserve better, a man that will give you everything you need, not a biker like me, who doesn’t care what tomorrow brings, and likes it that way. Nah, you’re better than that, so get it out of your head that anything’s happening between us, because it ain’t.”
And with that said, I hand her the helmet again, trying desperately to ignore the tears that are now rolling down her face. She needed to hear it; I can’t offer her what she needs. Sure, I can get her protection, but that’s it. And yeah, I don’t want any other fucker to have her either, but that’s not the point.
With that decision made, and as much as it made things ache inside me, and not in a good way, I turn around in the seat, start my bike, lift the kickstand, and signal to the others to leave.