Chapter 19
Jonas
I was still struggling with what had happened the night before when Arthur’s number appeared on my cell phone screen. I toyed with the idea of letting it go to voicemail, but in the end, I decided that I couldn’t hold Arthur responsible for every stupid decision Leo made. “Hey,” I said, grabbing it at the penultimate ring before it went to voicemail.
“Don’t say anything,” Arthur said. “I need to tell you that I’m sorry; you were right about Leo needing a different style of parenting." He took a deep breath. “And not that it makes it any better, but that wasn’t CBD in the vape pen.”
The air rushed out of my chest. “What?”
“Leo was just being an ass. It’s an herbal blend, one hundred percent the regular herbs you can get from the grocery store in the health food department. He stuck a chocolate flavor cartridge in it to make it more tolerable. It’s like kava kava, and St. John’s Wort, and something else. Totally harmless. But I know that’s not the point.”
“I don’t know what those things are, but if you say I can pick them up anywhere, then I believe you.”
He let out an audible sigh on the other end. “Thank you. That means a lot.”
“Listen, I had a great time last night, and I was thinking. There’s a guest speaker at our church this afternoon.”
“I thought church was Sundays,” he said.
“It is. But we have volunteering again tomorrow, and this speaker isn’t church. I know I’m supposed to be the expert in teen development, but I have to admit that I’m out of my depth with teens and blending families. The guest speaker is covering blending families, and how to help kids learn to go from acquaintances to siblings.”
“Siblings?”
“I know we’re not there yet, but I’ve been thinking about going, just to hear what he has to say. And after last night, I think we should both go.”
“Church isn’t really my thing.”
“That’s all right, because this isn’t church. It’s at a church, and it’s supposed to be a really good program." I shrugged, even though he couldn’t see me. “It couldn’t hurt to learn a little bit more about how to help our boys make this transition a little easier.”
He was quiet for a moment, but I just waited. One thing I’d learned about Arthur was that he did things on his own time, and he was much more amenable if I didn’t push. I knew I had him when he finally sighed.
“All right,” he said. “But just because I go doesn’t mean I subscribe to everything they’re saying.”
“Of course not. I don’t expect that I’ll go for everything he says, either.”
“What about the boys? We obviously can’t leave them alone again.”
I laughed. “See, we already agree on something. I was already going to go, so I have Gina booked until late tonight; we can have dinner afterwards, if you’re up for it."
When he didn’t answer right away, I hurriedly added, “I know I overreacted last night, and it’s okay if you need a little romantic space after that, and—”
“Stop,” he said, his deep chuckle setting my soul aflame. “You reacted fine last night. My kid screwed up, and he needs to see that it’s not acceptable. Don’t ever make excuses for your authentic feelings. You love Eddie, and you’re protective of him. You wouldn’t be a good father if you weren’t.”
I felt the tension drain out of my body. “I don’t know how you do that.”
“Do what?”
“Just accept people and their actions at face value like that. You’re so balanced and so calm.”
“Selling health and wellness isn’t just about pimping herbs." He laughed. “Sorry, someone said it to me just like that, and I never got over how insulted I was. But really, wellness is your whole being, inside and out. You can’t medicate a crappy attitude away, or Leo would be much more pleasant to be around.”
This time, we both laughed. “You’re just amazing, Arthur. I mean it. I’ll have to pick your brain about some of the non-medicinal things you do. I’ve been told I’m wound pretty tight.”
“I like you tight,” Arthur said, and I felt the familiar yearning to hold him well inside me. It felt like a lifetime since we’d made love, and an eternity until we would find time to be together again.
“You’re quiet. Did I say something wrong?”
“No,” I said quickly. “I was just thinking about last night, and how I couldn’t wait to see you again.”
“You’ll see me in a few hours,” he said, his tone heavy with meaning.
“That’s not the same. You know what I mean. It was just—” I broke off, not sure how to describe the time I’d spent in his arms. “You are the piece that has been missing from my life for a long time. I just can’t get enough.”
“I know the feeling,” Arthur said. “I’ll meet you at your house, and we can ride over together.”
“Sounds good,” I said, then hung up the phone and tried to still my fluttering heart. This was more serious than I’d expected it to be by now, and for the first time in as long as I could remember, the thought of spending the rest of my life with one man didn’t terrify me.
I was ready. I just hoped that Arthur’s feelings went as deep as mine.
***
Leo was grumpy on the way over to Jonas’s house later that day, but when we got closer, I could see his excitement grow despite the walls he kept putting up. He genuinely liked Eddie, and the teens had fun together.
When I pulled into the driveway, I grabbed Leo’s backpack before he could. “This is staying in the car,” I said. “I don’t want a repeat of last night.”
“You’re such an ass, Arthur,” he said, but I could tell his heart wasn’t in the jab. He knew he’d messed up.
Not fighting me over the backpack was as close as I was going to get to an apology, for now. But I was hoping to pick up some helpful tips at the seminar.
Jonas smiled and gave Leo a warm hello as they passed on the walkway, but Leo didn’t say a word. Our eyes met and Jonas just shrugged, jogging to the car and smiling. “He’ll get there,” he said, his voice hopeful. “He puts on a good show, but I’m chipping away at his defenses.”
“Your car or mine?”
“Yours is fine. You never really get to drive.”
“All right, let me just put my bong in the trunk, and—” I trailed off, and his eyebrow shot up. “I’m joking. I am going to put Leo’s backpack in there, though.
“I can’t guarantee that he doesn’t have something ridiculous in his pockets, but he was surprised I took his backpack. I don’t think he had a plan B for today.”
“Hey, sometimes that’s all you can do.”
I let him point out the way to the church, my left hand on the wheel, my right hand holding his. When we finally got there, the massive, elaborate building filled with gorgeous stained glass took my breath away. I started to pull my hand from his, but he stopped me.
“It’s okay here,” he said, knowing exactly what I was worried about. “I wouldn’t go to a church that belittled who I am as a person. Especially since I have a son."
He looked into my eyes and smiled. “And if you were the only one with a son, I would still care just as much about making sure they never felt shamed for who their family was.”
Relief washed over me. “That’s good to hear. I was a little worried.”
He shook his head, then kissed the top of my head. “There will be a lot of couples like you and me.”
“I doubt anyone has found a man as wonderful as you,” I said, only half teasing. “But I’m sure many have tried.”
He blushed ever so slightly, and I kissed him impulsively, then pulled away and flicked my eyes in the direction of the church. “It’s time to get started.”
“We could leave,” he said, his expression saucy, eyes twinkling with mischief.
“No. We have all our lives to enjoy each other. But it will be a lot simpler when we have our kids on the right path." I grabbed a notebook and a pencil. “I’m ready for this.”
He grin was still a mile wide when we got out of the car and he took my hand. We were in this together, and we were going to emerge victorious.
Our sons depended on us, and it was nice to finally find a man who took that responsibility as seriously as I did.