9

LEVI

 

I don't know what I did to get a second chance. But I'm taking it and holding on as tight as I can. Brynn is it for me, and this time I don't need to put a ring on her finger to know it. Although, putting a ring on her finger and maybe, someday soon, a baby in her belly, are all too appealing ideas.

Ones that I think about all the time, in fact. When we're making dinner together and she looks at me, those emerald eyes sparkling. When we lie in bed talking about our day, how Amelia is growing, about everything. Every single time I see her holding my daughter. How she looks at Amelia and she looks at Brynn; I want to give her a dozen more babies.

“Pretty sure I am hours away from being a dad.” Hunter's booming southern drawl breaks into my own thoughts about fatherhood.

“You ready Byrne?” I ask with a quirked brow, although I have no doubt he is.

Hunter is the oldest of the four of us who have become family here at Ladder 71. Really, we're all family; we used to hang out at the bars and chase women—really there was little chase involved—but a lot of us have grown up. Gotten married. Settled down. Truth be told, we all figured Hunter might be the last man standing.

Took five-foot-five inches of Lola Von to change that. I am almost as excited as he is about the child he has coming. They decided against learning the gender. I'm voting for girl. Hunter has been snarly for weeks, and I know Lola's due date was a week ago. Lola has been in constant contact with Brynn since the day came and went with no baby.

“Past ready, bro. Lola and Brynn finished the gender neutral,” He says this term with a roll of his eyes and air quotes, “nursery two nights ago. It’s a boy, I just know it.” His mocking tone turns softer as he says this and suddenly, I no longer wish a girl on him.

“Just keep that little Byrne away from my little Holt, then. I'm excited for you though. You got to be there for the whole deal, will get to be there for delivery. You nervous about all those firsts?” I realize how bitter those words taste when I think about all I missed with Amelia.

Because of Isabel being so Goddamn selfish, I never got to feel my baby kick, or hear her heartbeat for the first time. Never got one of those alien looking ultrasounds that Hunter has pinned up proudly all over his office. Instead, I was filling my loneliness with a handful of loose women while my daughter was growing with someone who didn't give two shits.

Won't happen again. When Brynn and I have kids, I will be at every single ultrasound, every lame Lamaze class, whatever they need. I will gladly run out to get her pickles and ice cream at two in the morning if that's what she wants. Anything for my girls.

“No way! I mean the idea of the birth is freaking me the fuck out, not going to lie. Lola is so damn tiny. I worry about her.” He's not wrong, Lola looks unchanged from her tiny pixie figure, other than the medium melon her belly grew into.

“Lola might be the strongest chick I ever met. Besides Gigi, who is like, Wonder Woman strong. Just consider the beast she tamed.” Hunter glances past his office door towards the common room where six-foot seven mountain man Finn is chugging a beer we both know will have zero effect on him.

“I mean right now, I believe my woman can do anything. Get me in the birth room, I might be the one to bitch out, who knows. I am worried about after, though. I won't lie. Worried about what parts of me my son my end up with. They're not all good, after all. Lola, I hope evens out however my genes might fuck it up, though. My woman doesn't have any bad parts.” I am about to bust his balls about his bad parts, namely his bald head and southern boy twang when his phone goes off.

“Oh, shit it's the baby phone!” Cage calls from behind me; I turn to see both he and Finn standing anxiously in the doorway.

All eyes turn to Hunter. Our fearless leader, both on the job and off. He looks absolutely terrified. I cover my laugh with a fist when he glares at me. Suddenly, his office is a flurry of movement as he snatches the phone up, shouting into it as he rushes out.

“Don't worry chief, we got you covered!” Cage calls after him.

“I'm on my way Darlin. Don't you have my boy without me! Levi let's roll!” I leap to my feet to rush after him, forgetting for a moment I am part of their birth plan.

A really, very small part, I am an official part of it nonetheless. For the past two weeks, I have been watching that phone too, though far less anxiously than Hunter. He and I even made some practice runs between here and the condo, and then the hospital. Timed that shit and everything. Basically, I am their baby chauffeur.

And of course, my girl needs to be there for Lola.

Brynn has Gwen lined up to come for Amelia once we got the call. Since neither Cage nor Finn have given her babies yet—although I have caught Cage and Charli twice in the act of doing their damned best—I am officially her favorite fireman. Brynn has yet to allow Gwen, or anyone really, take Amelia for more than a quick visit. The Cooper women get their time in with her though, make no mistake about that.

“Good luck, Hunter. Coopers will be there as soon as we can.” Finn shouted after us as we rush down the stairs and out to Hunter's truck.

Hunter waves a hand, but his attention is on his wife. I smile a little, because its surreal to see us all act so adult and sensitive. A year ago, we were shouting obscenities at each other and fucking women in bars. Like, literally in the bar a few times. I don't miss that shit one bit.

Going to weddings, being there for the births of their kids, housewarming parties, that shit is way better. A few of us took our time getting here, and a few of us—myself included—didn't make the right choice the first time. Arriving at the condo, seeing the love on Hunter's face when he sees his wife, I'm positive they got it right.

Seeing my girl waiting for us to share this with them, I know I got it right this time, too.

 

 

 

Getting to the hospital, Lola to a delivery room and the show on the road was a blur. Before I knew it, Brynn and I were both in head to toe blue crepe like scrubs, following a chattering nurse down a wood paneled hallway. Brynn managed to make those scrubs look hot as fuck.

“I'm fucking you in those scrubs.” I warned her as we followed behind the nurse,

“Behave.” Brynn's creamy skin flushed though, freckles dotting her nose and I knew she didn't mean it.

Besides, the sway she put in her hips told me certainly did not want me to behave. We followed the nurse past the windows protecting a handful of newborns and I paused. Brynn went a few steps without me before turning back. I didn't have to say the words, somehow, she just knew.

“Amelia won't remember you watching her on the other side of a pane of glass, baby. She will remember you telling her stories. Rocking her while you listen to Stevie Nicks. Cuddling with her on Sunday mornings when we all sleep in. That's what she will remember. You being the best father you how to be.” Brynn slid beneath my arm, hooking hers around me and pressing her face against my neck.

I loved her. I loved Brynn more than I knew you could love someone. There was barely room in my heart for anything else except Amelia. I loved that Princess without end. Would do anything for her, I knew it that first day. Now I had two women I would die for, would literally lay my life down for.

I felt the words on my lips. Was so damned ready to say them to her. Until I looked down and saw her face. Saw the sadness in those mossy green eyes, tears glistening in them, as she too stared in at the sleeping babies. I knew I couldn't say them until Brynn could be honest with me; because until then, if she said them back, they wouldn't be true. They wouldn't really be mine.

I was aware of everything about Brynn. Had watched her from afar for so long. I knew when she was tired or anxious. When she was angry or sad. I knew how to touch her just right to get her hot. I knew when she was holding back. When she was lying.

Brynn had been lying to me for months. Lying to me and Lola and everyone around us. Lying to herself. Letting first Lola then me and Amelia be her excuse to avoid going home. Truth was, whatever the truth was, it was not going to let her get away so easily. We were bigger than the truth, Brynn and her truth just had to get right with that.

“Let's go. We got places to be.” I head down the hall as anger floods me

“Levi, wait....” I don't wait. Don't slow down. Never even look back before we push through the doors into Lola's room.

The room is contained chaos. Lola already has a hospital gown on—bright purples and blues that she chose weeks ago—legs up in stirrups. A tangent of the foulest language I have ever heard streams from her tiny body as it writhes on the bed. But, in true Lola fashion, she says this filth as she giggles and gazes lovingly at Hunter.

“Jesus mother fuck a whore.” Lola shrieks before her shout breaks off into a laugh.

“Lola Bear. Language. Little ones are about to be among us.” I tsk as I edge towards the bed.

“Midge. We're here, mama.” Brynn softens once she lays eyes on her best friend.

The women bend their heads towards one another, Brynn smoothing her hand over Lola's belly. Something passes between them that I can't ignore. That look speaks of something shared between the two of them and no one else.

I try to stay angry. Try to hold on to it so I can protect myself when I need to. Protect Amelia. Until Brynn looks at me.

Tears shine in her jade eyes and I break. Whatever it is that just happened between them, it's part of what she keeps from me. And in that look, I know it kills her to do it. I know that she wants me to push. Brynn wants someone to make her come clean, someone to stop making it so damn easy on her. And I'm going to be that someone.

Somewhere along the line, people stopped asking the questions that mattered. Stopped seeing her answers. Her parents, her brother, maybe even Lola. Brynn carried all of it around on her own, waiting for someone to give a fuck enough to ask and take some of it for her.

To let her admit her bad choices and fuck ups then move away from them. Let them go. Instead of forcing her to line them up inside her walls and face them alone every fucking day.

I go to her now, taking her hand and bringing it to my lips. I'm still angry. Still hurt. Because I want to know the truth. But I'm pissed because it’s me who hasn't had the balls to ask. I can't lose her again. Not when I finally found what I'd always been looking for in her.

Brynn and Amelia take the dull, pulsing ache of loneliness away. They make me want to build a fucking castle and let them rule my entire fucking world inside the safety of it.

We stay by our friends while they welcome their first child. I hold her hand tight, watching her coach Lola like a pro. I even take Hunter's hand for a moment right after the tiny human comes screaming out. We will deny that later, I'm sure.

“It's...a boy!” Hunter hoots loudly enough I have no doubt he woke the other babies on the floor.

I watch him cradle that tiny baby, already promising him shit about fast cars and football and I am both proud to be part of it and again sad I missed my daughter being born. Then my eyes sweep towards Brynn, who I think will be tending to Lola.

Instead, her eyes are soft as she watches me. No matter what, she never let go of my hand once I reached out to her. I tug her once and she comes to me, nuzzling into my chest. I breath deep her sweet peppermint-peony scent, holding her tight. When she tips her head back and looks at me in that way that drives me crazy, I start backing from the room.

“Excuse us. Mom. Dad.” I wink at the couple as they cuddle on the bed with their new son.

I don't wait for a response. I'm shoving Brynn down the hall, past rooms full of new mothers, fathers, sons and daughters. I don't stop until I find an empty room around a corner. I close the heavy door and lock it behind us.

Brynn says nothing. Just watches me. I untie the loose string of the scrubs I pulled on earlier. My dick is tenting them, I'm so hard. Just a push and I spring out, my hand going to pump a few times. I get two strokes in before Brynn is on her knees, her hands wrapping around me.

“Open your mouth.” I command as both my hands thread through her crimson hair.

Brynn obeys, opening her pink lips and closing them around my cock. I hiss out a moan, almost shooting down her throat the second her tongue swirls around me. I still her head, refusing to let her move until I get a hold of my shit. I loosen my hold and she starts moving, bobbing her head. Filling the room with lewd, fuck-hot sounds of her sucking my cock.

“Holy, fuck, honey. You look so hot with those lips wrapped around me. That's it, just like that. Fuck, baby.” I'm pumping my hips, her hand is holding my balls, rolling them, and she's sucking until her cheeks hollow out.

I want to be inside her though. Need it. Need to come with her. I don't know how long I can last with her sucking me like that. I smell how hot she is, hear her scrubs rustle, and look down. Fuck. Her hand is in her scrubs, rubbing furiously at her pussy.

“Fuck, Brynn. It gets you that hot to suck my cock? Don't you make that pussy come. I need it. Need to feel you come on my cock again.”  I let her take me to the back of her throat a few more times, because, Jesus, it’s so good, but I stop her.

I twist her towards the single bed in the room, bending her over it. With a hard yank, I tear those scrubs down her legs Fuck. She's bare beneath, her thighs slick and her desire sweet and heavy in the air. I drop behind her, licking that sweetness up, suckling at her throbbing clit.

“Brynn, you taste so fucking good, honey. So sweet.” I lick at her, spreading her swollen lips with my tongue, sucking hard and long.

“Fuck. Levi!” Her hands fist the sterile sheets, her thighs trembling already.

“I love that fucking sound.” I growl, slapping her ass hard, my dick jerking when she moans.

I want to make her come on my tongue again, but I can't wait. I stand, lifting her left knee up on to the bed, spreading her open to me. I don't have a condom, but right then, I don't even want one. All I can think of us what we were just a part of. About having something like that with her.

“I'm fucking you raw, Brynn. I want to come inside you. Want to feel my cum fill you up. Tell me not to.” As much as I may want it, as clouded as my head is, I won't take the choice from her.

“Yes. Yes. Come inside me, baby.” That's it. I'm a goner.

I thrust once, so hard, so deep she cries out, burying her face into the mattress. I slap her ass again, warning her to be quiet. Grabbing hold of her hips, I start thrusting. Deep, hard thrusts that rock her body, move the entire bed and bury me inside her. I wrap one hand around her thick hair, tugging her head back, bending to take her mouth.

It’s hot and sweaty and noisy and absolutely crazy. All I can think of is coming. Making her come. Making her pregnant. Making this all stick. Keeping her for my queen. Being her king. My tongue is tangling with hers, my hips pumping as I pound into her, breathless and crazy.

“Don't care if it sticks tonight. It's going to stick. My queen. Going to give me princes and Princesses.” I just think of giving her children, giving her the fairytale I think she deserves.

“Fuck, Levi. Baby.” There it is; those words, and that sound she moans before she comes.

My pace picks up because I want to come with her. Want to share that with her. It’s almost savage how hard, how fast I pump my hips, but she takes it. My face is in her shoulder, my chest to her back, my mouth at her skin. My teeth sink in when I feel my orgasm start to build and then she starts to shudder, and we come together.

We collapse against the bed, breathless and sweaty. I don't move for a moment, feeling my dick jerk as I spill inside her. And, fuck, I like how that feels. Then, I panic.

I worry I was too rough, too absolutely fucking crazy. Threatening to get her pregnant? Calling her my queen like that? Asking for Princess and Princesses? What the fuck, Lev? Too much GOT, maybe. Brynn fills the quiet with giggles, her body trembling beneath mine.

“Shall I bend the knee?” I laugh too, expelling the breath I had been holding as I swat at her backside.

“Of course, you should. You do magic with that mouth, honey.” We laugh again and the weirdness is gone, just like that.

I fix her clothes, looking up at her as I bend to tug her pants back up. As I do, I quirk a brow, pointedly shoving my come inside her. Brynn moans, her eyes fluttering and I grin. Fuck, this woman. I dress again, shoving onto the bed and opening my arms. Brynn crawls into them, snuggling close as we come down from the impromptu love making.

After a few moments, I want to ask. What that look was that passed between her and Lola. Why she never let my hand go while Lola was in labor. Why she seemed as sad as I was about the parts we had missed with Amelia. Turns out, she seems to want to share.

“You want more kids, baby?” I nod before she finished the question, closing my arms around her.

“Mmm, yes, I do. Don't know that I knew that for sure before Amelia. I do now though. Is that what you want to ask?” Brynn pops up and the sadness in her eyes breaks my heart.

“Did...all that you just said....” She bows her head and I reach out, shoving her hair behind her ear and tipping her chin back up.

“I meant it. Fuck, Honey, the idea of you carrying my child. I want it, Brynn. I want tonight for us. This belly round with my son. Being there with you while you grow our child. I want it so fucking bad. I want everything with you.” Brynn looks away, her hair falling into her face.

“Why do you believe I could be a mother?” I cradle her jaw, turning glossy eyes back to mine.

“Oh honey. Because you are. Amelia is as much yours as she is mine. You are her mother, Brynn. You’ve been there from the moment I asked you to give us a chance. Every morning, every night, and in between; it's been you. You are Amelia’s mother. All she knows. She loves you so much...and I...” Just as I start to tell her I do too, she breaks my heart.

“I had a daughter...I wasn't very good at it the first time...” Brynn begins to sob, her entire body shaking on the bed.

“What...when? With...with who? Talk to me, baby. I need to know, Brynn. Every single part of you. Let's start here.” I plead, urging her to break down the last of her crumbling bricks and let me in.

“Prom night of my senior year. I was being as rebellious as Brynn Gold got. Because I had nothing left to lose. My grades were aces, I was valedictorian, I got into my first-choice college, and had my future waiting for me to step into it. Lola was...gone. Then my brother. There was nothing left of me by then. My parents considered both their children dead. Nothing left to lose,” I cradle her on the tiny bed, smoothing my fingers through her hair as she looked into her past “Like a fool, I said yes to the sleazy quarterback, wore the sluttiest dress possible, and let him take me to the hotel after two songs. Let him tell me it would be so much better without a condom. I wanted it. Wanted to give away the last part of me that I still had. Three months later when classes started, I realized how much I had given away. I aced everything back then; including getting pregnant on my first try.” Brynn let out a snort of a laugh. I just brought her closer, held her tighter.

“Did he...I mean, did he want to be a part of it?” Brynn shook her head and sniffled.

“No. Said it was impossible. He was too skilled, he said; pulled out like a pro. I didn't want him to be a part of it, to be honest. I didn't even know him. He was a means to an end. A pretty one, but still. I knew right away I didn't want to keep her. Not because I didn't want her. Or even because it was a stupid mistake. I loved Abbi the moment I knew she existed. I don't know how it's possible. But I know it is.” I knew exactly what she meant.

“I hated Isabel by the time she brought Amelia to me. The minute I looked at that Princess, I loved her. I don't care if she is mine or not. She's mine.” Brynn smiles and nods too.

“I did too, I think. That first night I knew that love again. I said yes for you. For me. Because I wanted to be with you anyway I could be. But for her too, because I already loved her somehow. Even when it hurt to feel that again.” Pain flares in my chest as I realize what I did to my girl.

“Oh, honey. I made you come raise my daughter after you...” Brynn twists, going up on her knees between my legs.

“Amelia is what started healing me, baby. It was hard, yes. At first. To see her grow and change and know I missed it. Holding her, putting her to bed, cuddling with her while I read to her; all the things I missed out on. I made a choice for her, Levi. I had nothing to give her then. Even less after. Doesn't mean I never wished I did. I do all the time, and that just my selfishness. But, I loved her and I love Amelia.” Brynn catches her bottom lip in her teeth because we both see it. See her biting her words back. Brynn loves me, too and right then, she nearly said so.

There's so much more to say. More truths to be told after tonight. Right then neither of us needed it. I just needed her. To feel her, and see that look in her eyes. One that shines of her own need and love. Because I know that's how I look at her.

I take her mouth, hands shoving at her scrubs again. Brynn scrambles to get closer, opening her lips to my tongue, giving me that moan that's her plea for more. I yank her down my lap, already driving into her the moment I have her scrubs out of the way.

“Levi!” Brynn moans, both hands hooking into my shoulders, nails digging in just like I like it,

“Hush, honey. Don't close those eyes, Brynn. You look at me when I'm inside you. Nowhere else. Tell me why.” I demand as I curve my hands around her hips, slamming her down on my cock.

“Because it's us. Just us.” Brynn whimpered, bucking against me, her eyes wild and hungry.

“Fucking right. Just us honey. You're just mine. I'm just yours. No one else.” I angled her hips, hissing out a groan as she shoved off me, then slid back down again.

This time, it’s less rushed, less about my need to make it stick. Because, I know now, it is going to stick. With or without Amelia, this would stick. I fuck her slow and deep, watching the parts of her that were empty fill up. With me. With Amelia, with us. When I come inside her again, I don't care if it sticks or not.

We are going to stick.

Brynn's walls are little more than rubble at her feet. But, I still need to wade through the destruction and build her back up. Make her strong and whole again. Tonight, I intend to get started on doing just that.

Gwen refused to return Amelia, at least till tomorrow, giving us our very first baby-free night. I plan to destroy every wall Brynn has left tonight. Then get to the building part.

We leave a happy family at the hospital, both Hunter and Lola beaming. The ride home is quite but charged with everything we said, everything we will say. I hold Brynn close to me, knowing damn well tonight has changed us. Changed this thing between us. Brynn wants to build a fairytale with me too. I just need to figure out what we are fighting to keep out.

Once we get home I run a bath while she climbs into bed. Watching her in my home, our home, I vow to conquer any dragon foolish enough to try and destroy this fairytale. That woman will be my queen, mother to my children and I will do right by her, Amelia, and our family. No matter how high I need to build this castle, I won't let them get hurt.

Stepping into the bedroom, I just look at her. The gauzy thong she has on is pointless—and will be gone in a few seconds. Brynn looks like the queen she is, lying there. A crown of mussed crimson hair. Creamy, fair skin on the curves and lines of her hips and ass. I decided it’s time I start worshiping her properly. I go on my knees at the edge of the bed and begin to do just that.

“Levi...” I love how she says my name, as if her lips form the letters differently than anyone else.

“Mmm, you know. I decided. Amelia is our Princess, yeah,” Brynn nods her head as my hands skim up her calves, “Makes you my queen, doesn't it? Like I said earlier, think I ought to start treating you like it.” My dick is hard already but when she gives me that shudder, it gets impossibly harder.

Slowly, my hands work over her body. Starting at her ankles, I massaged her calves, her thighs. Kissed her instep, the spot behind her knee that makes her giggle. Lavish a deep, slow kiss at her pussy. Bite her hip, lick the marks I leave. Suckle her nipples into my mouth.

I turn her over, crawling over her, my knees at her hips. My hands never stop moving. Never stop touching her. Learning what spot makings her shiver. Which spot raises goosebumps on her flesh. I rip her panties off, kissing away the marks I leave. Bite new ones into her plump ass, lick her swollen folds, savoring her taste. I just circle her tiny starfish ass when she comes the first time.

“Fuck....Levi...baby.” I smile against her and do it all over again.

Brynn comes two more times, once with my tongue buried inside her pussy, and when I pump two fingers inside her and a third into her ass. All before I ever take my dick out. It’s not actually me who takes him out, in fact. She shoves a hand between her legs after shoving up on her knees.

Glancing back at me like the sexiest nanny I've ever seen, she guides me to her hot pussy and shoves back. I see stars. It’s just a few strokes of me bare inside her again before I shove her flat against the bed, pumping myself into her. We both moan as I fill her again.

Afterwards, I carry her to the bath. It soothes my aching joints and she's hot as fuck all slippery and soapy. We stay in until the water goes cold; I empty it and refill it and take my time washing her. Before I let her out, she rides my hand to another orgasm; after I towel her off, she drops to her knees and returns the favor.

Brynn is in bed brushing her wet hair out. In my CFD shirt, filled with my come and my promises when I see it. Her phone lit up with a call. From Boston, again. I shake away the dread I feel and join her in bed. I can't help but mention it though, and she cringes when I do. 

 “Boston,” I said, my chest aching at the idea of her having a home somewhere else, “I said it's not an option. Tell me you know that. Honey, tell me you know you can't even consider your home being anywhere else but here. With me and Amelia.” Brynn bows her head, taking a slow breath as that ache spreads.

“I don't want to go back. I never meant to.... how could I know you were here? That you could change everything? I know you want to protect me. Protect us. You can't protect me from Boston. It was selfish of me to think you could.” Brynn sets her brush aside, going up on her knees to face me.

“I will do whatever it takes to keep my family safe. You are my family, Brynn. Whatever it takes. I am okay building this thing with you a brick at a time. I can't do it if you don't let me in enough to build the walls high enough to protect us, honey.” Brynn looks at me, her eyes soft and a little sad and it kills me. I don't know if she will give me what I need to protect her.

“I build things, Levi. It's what I do. I am so Goddamn good at it; most people can't see the cracks or shitty foundation. You do though. No one else.... only Lola and my mother know about Abbi. And, now you. I am giving you the bricks, Levi.” Brynn reaches out to me, her words doing nothing to soothe me.

“A brick at a time, then.”

Killed me that my girl couldn't just tear her walls down with me, but I meant it. I would rebuild us a brick at a time, if that's what it took. 

Two days after baby Byrne entered the world, I was quite sure my own world might be in trouble. I came home from work to find every single wall in the house, except Amelia’s room, bare. Drop cloths covered the kitchen counters and hardwood floors. Brynn was painting the cream walls a lovely gray, her cute ass in my sweats and tank top again.

“Umm...honey. What are we doing here?” We had not discussed painting. Let alone a complete remodel of our place.

A few days after we finished Amelia's room, I had walked into something similar. But, Lola had been there, painting a tree mural on the wall. It was perfect and fucking adorable. Brynn was so excited as she pointed out the pink and brown owls that were me and Amelia. This....this is different.

“Got bored. Thought since we painted Amelia's room, might as well do the whole house. Like this color, you think?” I did, actually, like the color.

Brynn had four shades of gray painted on the wall, and was asking me about one shade in particular. Isabel had hired painters to do the place when we first moved in. Then a decorator friend—instead of Regan Cooper, Cage's sister, who I'd asked to help us. I had no say whatsoever in how my place looked. Though I was surprised to come home to it in chaos, I liked that she was asking me.

“I do, actually. Come here. Give me something.” Brynn giggles and tips her head back, giving me the sweetness of her mouth.

We don't paint much that day. We do get dirty though. Her ass prints end up on the wall and I argue that I don't want her to paint over it. She does though; and then the kitchen. The bedroom. Even the hall.

I come home one day to the furniture being gone. I pinned her to the cold hardwood and fucked her after she asked to go look for a new set together. A few days later, it's a new bedroom set.

“Either my girl is going through some kind of crisis or she just won the lottery. Every day it's something new at our place.” Hunter is back and as he's my go-to for relationship shit, I ask him about it during a call.

“Man...my first wife replaced my couch ten times. We agreed on one and I found her fucking the carpenter on it a few weeks later. I hated that fucking couch.” Cold washes over me, but I know better.

Brynn is not Isabel. From the beginning, this thing has felt different. I married Isabel not because of love, although I did care about her, but just because I thought it would make it stick. What I have with Brynn, what I feel for her, it will always stick with me, wedding ring or not. I realize suddenly, we never talk about the future and I wonder if I should be asking those questions.

“Maybe she wants to get married?” I wondered out loud.

“Then marry her. Married the wrong girl once. Might do you good to marry the right one this time, man.” Hunter shrugs as if it really is that simple.

“I love her. I love her with my daughter. Those girls...I would die for them. I just can't.... I can't get through to her how impossible we are to deny. I don't have all of her yet because part of her is holding on to Boston.” I winced as I said the truth out loud.

Boston feels like the lover who broke her heart that I can't compete with. It was her home, the place she wanted to make a life and now it’s over. Brynn won't tell me why she doesn't want to go back. I wish the family Amelia and I offer is her only reason, but I know better.

Something won't let her go and I thought, at first, that it was someone else. Lola insists that’s impossible. Brynn can be evasive with details. I do think a lover waiting in the wings would have come up, though.  

“Levi...ever think Brynn doesn't let go of that place because she doesn't know what to hold on to here?” Our rig pulls up to a small fire and I blink at it.

Shit. Right there on the curb, I kiss Hunter Brynn on the cheek. Cage and Finn wolf whistle and the rest of the guys applaud. Hunter is fuming but I just smile because he just righted my world again.

“Let’s put this fire out, boys! I got a family to get home to!”

After we do put that fire out, I can't wait to get home to my girls. No matter what I walk into, how it might look today, that is our home. I didn't think I needed to tell Brynn that. Now, I realize I do. Brynn is in limbo because of Boston; I demand she stay but never said I wanted her to stay here, with me and Amelia.

“Honey, I'm home!” Damn, it feels good to say that when I come home a few hours later.

“In the bedroom. Amelia is with Gwen, baby. Come look.” I head down the hall, noting some new artwork is hanging on the walls.

“Mmm, my queen.” I press into her from behind, the little box in my pocket reminding me what I need to ask.

“Hey, baby. I missed you.” Brynn lets me hold her as I survey the new room.

Brynn texted me all morning about our new bedroom set. We picked it out a few nights ago and she was so excited to have it delivered and set up today. When I got home, she was just finishing with the new bedspread she picked out to match the gray and teal look she seems to be going for. I like it and what's more, I like that she's letting me be part of it. We're both building this castle.

“I like it, honey. You did good, Brynn.” I do like it, more than the set Isabel chose without my input.

“Thank you, baby. It's so pretty, right? Looks good with the gray.” Brynn twists in my arms, a look of pride on her beautiful face.

Fuck, I love her so Goddamn much. I want to lock her away in this castle so I know we can make this fairytale come true. I want to give her and Amelia the entire world, and I want to do it right now.

“I love it. I love that you made this place yours. Because it is, Brynn. I am yours. Amelia is yours. This family is yours. Now, so is the castle.” I produce the plastic box that has the keys I rushed to have made.

“Levi? What...what is this?” I back her towards the bed and go down on my knees; I laugh when her eyes go wide.

“Oh honey...I promise when I ask you to be my wife, I will not be dirty and covered in soot and you will not be covered in paint. Although, I like you dirty, baby. I want you to know you have a home here, now.” Brynn takes the box and opens to find the keys, her eyes flashing.

“Uh....what do...I mean.... what?” I take the keyring out and close her fingers around it.

“Move in with me. Make every room in this house yours. Ours. Don't go back to Boston. Ever.”

I expect the fear that flashes in her eyes. The hesitation. Brynn is holding on tight to Boston to protect herself. And, to protect Amelia and me from getting hurt again. It's another reason I love her; she put us first. So, I expect asking her to move in with us might scare her a little.

What I do not expect is rage.

“Move in with you? Why?” I'm sick at the tone of her question, the storming anger in her eyes.

“Uh....because I want you to live with us. Want you to call my home your home. I mean...I thought you wanted that too?” Brynn shoves to her feet and I stumble back, still on my knees.

“Levi, I do. I mean...I think I do. Levi...I don't...how can I? I don't even live in Chicago; Boston is my home.” Bitter anger floods me and I shoot to my feet, unable to rein it in.

“Bullshit, Brynn. I am your home. Amelia is your home. Your family is your home. You keep half your shit at Lola's place and half here, just to hold on to that bullshit escape clause. I want you here, with us. I want us to make a fucking life together. I thought...all this, I thought you wanted the same things.” My arms sweep out to indicate the entire house that she has changed in the last two weeks.

“All this....” Brynn looks around and I feel the air change between us.

“You painted every room, took down every picture, changed every single piece of furniture. Piece by piece. Like I asked you to give me brick by brick. I thought you....” I rub at my jaw as pain slices through me.

I thought Brynn wanted the same things. Now, I'm afraid we were just a temporary fix for her. To replace a family she gave up. I don't fault her for her choice. But suddenly, I wonder if that choice was too easy for her. Is she ready to give us up too?