Chapter Eleven
A COOL BREEZE came off the bay like a sigh and rolled over Kurt and Leanna, now fully dressed and lying on the blanket gazing up at the stars. Pepper’s leash was tied to Kurt’s belt loop, and the dog lay quietly beside them. Leanna’s leg was draped over Kurt’s, her head rested against his chest, and her index finger traced the ripples of his abs.
Kurt covered her hand with his. “You’re nervous.”
She didn’t respond.
“Was this too public? It was new for me, too. I’m sorry. Maybe we shouldn’t have—”
“No. It wasn’t that. I mean, it was public, but I wanted to be with you as much as you wanted to be with me, and this was fun. I’m glad we have a first for both of us.”
A first. Our first. He loved that. Kurt brushed her hair over her shoulder, thinking about firsts. Women thought about their first time, their first kiss. He knew that many of the things that were momentous in women’s lives revolved around men. His firsts, however, were tied to his writing. The first manuscript he completed, Beneath the Stillness. His first rejection letter. His first agent request for a full manuscript. The first offer of representation. His first publishing deal. His first live television interview. His first book award. If he really drew on his memory, he could pull the name of the first girl he’d kissed, Madeline Bern, but it was last in a long line of firsts. Firsts with women had never felt very momentous. This first went to the head of the line.
A first for both of us.
Kurt wasn’t a talker. His family and friends knew this about him, and they accepted it. He enjoyed observing more than being in the midst of the goings-on, but Leanna had flipped a switch inside him. He felt himself changing, wanting more, and it surprised him. Rather than fight these new feelings and climb back into his writer’s mind—the safety of his writer’s cave—he wanted to remain in her world.
“I feel like I’ve had a few firsts tonight,” he admitted.
“A few?”
She touched his cheek, and he closed his eyes for a breath, relishing in her touch. Her palm was warm and soft, loving.
“For the first time in years, I’m not thinking about writing.” He leaned up on one elbow and gazed into her eyes. “For the first time in as long as I can remember, I really and truly enjoyed making love.” He leaned in and kissed her. “I enjoyed making love to you, Leanna, being close to you. I like you. A lot.” His pulse sped up again. “And you’re wearing off on me. I never talk this much.”
She smiled, but she didn’t respond, and Kurt’s stomach tightened. He was moving too fast, baring his heart when he shouldn’t. He’d watched his brother Jack fall in love, and he’d caught glimpses of what it was like for him to really let someone into his life. Something inside him that he didn’t even know existed felt drawn to Leanna in that way. He wanted to let her in.
But was she pulling back? He wasn’t practiced enough at reading women to be sure. Worry snaked its way into the back of his mind.
“I didn’t exactly take you on a date, did I?” He sat up and leaned his arms over his knees. “I’m sorry. I’m not very good at this.”
She laughed softly as she pulled herself up beside him. “What are you talking about?”
“We had sex on the beach when I should have taken you to dinner, a movie, something more date-like. There’s probably some dating rule I know nothing about. No sex until the third date or something?” He shifted his eyes to her with a smile.
“You’re so funny. I don’t know many people who go out on three dates before they have sex.”
“Really?” He had always thought timelines for intimacy were odd. He either felt something or he didn’t, but he also wanted Leanna to know he really liked her in a way that was much deeper than just sex. “That’s kind of weird, too, isn’t it?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I probably would have slept with you at my cottage this morning, and we hadn’t even gone out on one date.”
He pulled her close. “Then why do I feel like something’s wrong right now?”
“Nothing’s wrong. I’m just embarrassed. Now you know about my weird inability to be in sync while we’re…” She glanced at the blanket.
“Oh, thank goodness.” He breathed a sigh of relief.
“Thank goodness?”
“Yeah. Here I was thinking I’d done everything wrong.” He pulled her onto his lap and gathered her thick hair in one hand and lowered his lips to her bared skin. “You’re perfect, sensual. Not awkward. Not weird. Perfect.”
“Come on, Kurt.” She rolled her eyes.
“Maybe we should do it again so I can prove it.” He smiled and she laughed. “Seriously. I’m not sure why you are so worried. We were perfectly in sync.”
She lowered her forehead to his. “I love when you lie to me.”
“I never lie, babe. It’s one of my faults. I’m not even sure how to lie.”
“Everyone lies.”
He pulled back and searched her eyes. “I don’t. I’ve never been able to fake feelings either. They’re either there or they’re not. It’s who I am.”
She rested her head on his shoulder and whispered, “Then we’re a perfect pair, because I’m who I am, too.”
THERE WERE NOT many things in life that scared Leanna. Starting over in a new city was exciting; quitting jobs was as easy as changing her clothes. She knew she could pick up the pieces of her life and find a way to carry on no matter what was going on around her. She might not be the neatest girl on the planet, or the most organized, and she might not remember everything—like where she left her bike or Pepper’s leash—but she knew the moment she set her head on Kurt’s shoulder that her heart had opened to him in a way it never had before. And that scared the heck out of her. One of her biggest skills was being discontent—and although this felt a world away from anything remotely similar to discontent, she hoped her mind didn’t steal this happiness from her.
As Kurt drove toward her cottage, her heart told her to invite him in and ask him to stay for the night, but her head told her that was stupid. They’d gone out once. She didn’t know him well enough. Yet her gut reaction was that he was not only trustworthy, but different from—maybe even opposite of—any man she’d ever met. It was after midnight when they pulled into Seaside. The lights in Bella’s and Jenna’s cottages were still on. Of course. Directly across from Leanna’s, Amy’s cottage was dark.
Kurt opened the car door for Leanna, something no man had done for her in the past. And there he was, standing tall and handsome in his linen pants, with those piercing blue eyes. A perfect gentleman. And what was she thinking? She wanted to rip his clothes off and climb on top of him again.
She stepped from the car, and he folded her in his arms.
“I wish I had thought to take you to my place for the night,” he whispered.
Could they possibly be in sync?
“I…um…” She turned at the sound of whispering behind her and noticed Amy, Bella, and Jenna walking up the street from the pool. Pepper took off in their direction, dragging the leash behind him.
Kurt followed her gaze. “Were they swimming?”
“Chunky-dunking.”
“Chunky-dunking?” He laughed. Their hair was piled up messily on their heads. Each woman was draped in a towel that barely covered her private parts, and they were grinning like fools.
“It’s what we call skinny-dipping,” she whispered. “The pool closes at eight, but we sneak in sometimes.”
“I’ll have to set my alarm so I don’t miss the next episode of Seaside Skinny-Dipping. May I see you tomorrow?”
May I? She reminded herself that words were his life. “I’m making another batch of jam tomorrow, so I’ll be here all day. Aren’t you writing tomorrow?”
“I write every day, but I’d like to fit some time in to see you. Unless you have plans or would rather not.”
Leanna sensed her friends behind her, turned, and nearly bumped into Bella.
“Bella,” she chided her. Pepper was legs to the sky with his tongue hanging out of his mouth as Amy scratched his belly.
“Sorry. I wanted to say hi to Kurt. Hi, Kurt.” Bella smiled and tilted her head.
“Hello, Bella.”
“This is Jenna.” Bella pointed to Jenna, who waved. “And Amy’s loving up Pep.”
“Hello, ladies. Nice to meet you.” He glanced at Leanna. “Tomorrow?”
“Sure. I don’t know what time I’ll be done. What do you have in mind?”
He leaned in close. “It doesn’t matter. I just like being around you. Although, I kind of owe you a real date.”
“A real date,” Bella whispered.
Leanna shot her a look.
“Sorry. We were talking about having a bonfire here in the quad tomorrow, if you guys want to join us.” Bella turned away and tightened her towel.
“That’s not exactly a real date, and I’m sure the last thing Kurt wants to do is hang out with a bunch of women.” Leanna touched his hand. “I’d love to see you.”
“I don’t mind hanging out with your friends if that’s what you’d like to do.”
“Great. Then it’s a date,” Bella said.
“Oh my gosh, Bella.” Leanna glared at her. “Jenna, please take her home.”
Jenna looped her arm into Bella’s. “Come on, Bell. Let’s give Leanna a little privacy.”
“I’m going, too.” Amy picked up Pepper’s leash and handed it to Leanna. “Nice to meet you, Kurt.”
“You, too, Amy.” Kurt settled his hands on Leanna’s hips, and she lowered her forehead to his chest.
“I’m sorry. Bella’s a little pushy.”
He lifted her chin with his index finger. “They seem nice. I don’t care what we do, as long as I’m with you. Why don’t you decide, and I’ll come by around six or so?”
“Perfect.”
He kissed her good night, and Pepper whined at his feet. Kurt shook his head. “Good night, Pepper.”
As he drove away, Leanna wondered if her luck had changed—or if she was on the way to a crash-landing but too high up in the clouds to notice.