Paige couldn’t get the door to open.
‘SHIT,’ she said through gritted teeth, kicking the bottom of the door, hard.
‘Need a hand there, girl?’ someone said from behind her.
‘Fuck off,’ she said, without turning round.
‘Charming.’
Paige leaned forward and rested her head against the door. She’d just wanted to get here, move in, go to sleep and not have to speak to anyone. Was that too much to ask? Instead she’d had to drive her dad to his girlfriend’s house because he was still over the limit from last night. Then she’d had to get a cab she couldn’t afford to the station, where the train was delayed and the coffee shop was closed for refurbishment when it was only the thought of one of their white chocolate brownies that had got her that far. And then on the Liverpool train she’d had to stand up and listen to a bunch of old fellas arguing about football and politics and calling each other pussies. She’d wanted to lean over and tell them that word was decidedly not an insult because there was nothing stronger than a pussy, but she hadn’t been able to make herself do it. Instead she’d posted a selfie on Instagram and hashtagged it #pussypower. By the time she’d got off the train, it already had ninety-two likes.
She’d had to walk from the station to the house, dragging her suitcase behind her even though one of the wheels was wobbling and it kept hitting her in the back of the legs. She snorted as she passed a ‘Gentlemen’s Club’ and then a ridiculous-looking barber shop, all chrome and blue lights. It was like the eighties here. She loved it even when she hated it.
She took a step back and looked up at the three-storey house she’d be calling home for at least the next year. Lights were on in almost every window so at least she knew her housemates were in. She looked around for a bell and when she didn’t see one, knocked first on the door and then on the nearest window. So much for her plan of sneaking in without actually having to talk to anyone.
She was considering giving up and going to sit in a coffee shop for half an hour when the door jerked open and a tiny girl wearing satin football shorts and a loose vest stood there grinning at her. Paige half recognised her from uni, but at uni she couldn’t usually see her nipples.
‘Are you Paige?’ the girl said, her eyebrows shooting up her forehead. ‘We were starting to think you weren’t coming.’
‘Yeah,’ Paige said. ‘Sorry. I got held up.’ She didn’t know why she was apologising.
‘Come in,’ the girl said, leaning forward to grab Paige’s bag and giving Paige a clear view down her top. ‘We’re about to do shots.’
‘Great,’ Paige said.
‘You’ve already met Issey,’ Liane said, pointing at the girl who’d answered the door.
‘Yeah, but I don’t think I said,’ Issey said. She was sitting cross-legged on the sofa now, a bottle of beer in one hand, her phone in the other. ‘I’m Issey.’
‘That’s Ella, and Lou’s outside having yet another fag,’ Liane told her.
‘Paige,’ Paige said. ‘I’ve seen you around,’ she said to Lou.
‘Yeah,’ Lou said from the terrace door. ‘You do look familiar. What are you studying?’
‘English and Cultural Studies,’ Paige said. ‘You?’
‘Just English,’ Lou said, frowning. Seconds later, she clicked her fingers. ‘You go to Bleachers!’
Paige smiled. ‘Yeah. Not lately. But I have been, yeah. Your hair’s great, by the way.’
Lou pulled her long silver hair up into a ponytail and let it drop. ‘Thanks. I get a discount cos I work there part-time.’
‘Yeah?’ Paige said. She really could do with getting her hair dyed professionally. She’d been doing it herself for a while now and it was OK, but not the same. There was no way she could afford it, but maybe Lou would do it for mates’ rates.
‘You’d look good violet,’ Lou said.
‘I was thinking red. Like, bright Little Mermaid red.’
Lou frowned, peering at Paige. ‘I think that might be too harsh. Maybe pink? Cerise?’
‘Sounds good to me,’ Paige said.
‘It’ll look super-hot,’ Issey said, from the sofa. ‘But never mind that now … SHOTS!’
‘You’re keen, for someone who’s never done them before,’ Ella said. She was perched on the edge of the coffee table, her elbow on her knee, her chin on her fist.
‘You’ve never done shots?’ Paige asked Issey.
‘Come and sit,’ Lou said, gesturing at the second sofa.
‘Nope,’ Issey said, popping the ‘p’. ‘Shot virgin.’
‘Or do you want to go and settle into your room first?’ Ella asked Paige.
‘No, it’s OK,’ Paige said. ‘Ta.’
If anyone had asked her, up to and including, like, five minutes ago, Paige would have said she had zero interest in doing shots with three girls she barely knew and one she … actually, four girls she barely knew. But now that she was here and they were friendly and the living room was cosy and her room was empty … well, maybe just the one.
Liane dropped down on the sofa next to Issey, who immediately curled up against her, rubbing her head against her neck like a cat, the way Liane usually did. Paige made herself look away.
‘So it’s shit tequila,’ Lou said. ‘It’s all I could afford. But it’ll get the job done.’
She poured the clear liquid into the glasses and they each held one up in front of their faces.
‘Hey,’ Issey said. ‘Aren’t we doing the slammer thing? With limes and salt or whatever it is.’
‘Oh fuxache,’ Lou groaned. ‘Do we have to?’
‘Shot virgin!’ Issey yelled, lifting her hands over her head. ‘We have to do it right!’
Lou rolled her eyes, but she got up and ran downstairs to the kitchen, coming back with limes and salt and a roll of paper towels. ‘In case you puke.’
‘I’m not going to puke,’ Issey said, but she looked almost nervous as she arranged the lime and salt on the table in front of her.
‘To second year!’ Lou said, holding up her glass.
‘To our own place!’ Liane said.
‘To fun!’ added Lou and downed her shot.
The others followed, wincing or gasping or laughing. Issey tipped hers back, sucked the lime, licked the salt off the back of her hand and said, ‘Fuck me!’
‘Good?’ Lou asked.
Issey placed the shot glass on the top of her head, her posture perfect. ‘Another?’
‘Boyfriend?’ Lou asked Paige when she was three shots down. She was sitting on the floor between Issey’s legs and Issey was attempting to braid her hair. ‘Girlfriend?’
Paige shook her head. ‘No one.’
‘Really?’ Issey said. ‘But you’re gorgeous.’
Paige dipped her head, her hair falling down over her face. It was ridiculous: if someone posted that on one of her Instagram photos, she’d happily reply ‘Thanks, babe!’ but IRL? Nope.
‘She might not be interested, Iz,’ Liane said. ‘Not everyone’s sex crazed like you.’
‘I’m not sex crazed,’ Issey said. She was lying down now, with her head on Liane’s lap. ‘I just like boys. Lots and lots of boys.’
‘I blame the parents,’ Liane said.
Issey laughed. ‘Yep.’
‘They’re strict?’ Paige asked. She’d only had the one shot – she didn’t really like tequila – but she was on her second beer.
‘Yup,’ Issey said. ‘My dad’s Greek. And I’m the youngest of five girls. So I was always totally babied and over-protected. So I came to uni and –’
‘Went wild,’ Lou finished.
Issey laughed. ‘Not wild. Not that wild. But wild for me. Wild enough that if my dad knew he’d, you know, die.’
‘My dad doesn’t care what I do,’ Paige said.
‘I’m sure that’s not true,’ Ella said instantly.
‘He doesn’t even know what uni I’m at.’ Paige put the beer bottle down on the coffee table and lined it up with the others, turning them so all the labels were facing her.
‘What?’ Ella said. ‘He must do!’
Paige shook her head. ‘He knows I’m at uni, obviously. But I kept waiting for him to ask where and he never did. So I just didn’t tell him.’
‘And your mum?’ Ella asked. She’d moved onto the sofa next to Lou and she hooked her arm through Lou’s, cuddling against her.
‘Dead,’ Paige said.
‘Fuck,’ Ella said. ‘I’m so sorry.’
‘I didn’t know that,’ Liane said, reaching out one perfect leg and poking Paige in the arm with her toes.
Paige shrugged. ‘It’s never come up.’
‘Ella’s family is perfect,’ Lou said. ‘So it upsets her when other people’s aren’t.’
‘Hey!’ Ella said. ‘That’s not fair.’ She started to sit up, pulling her arm away.
Lou pulled it back. ‘Come on. I’m only joking. But you have to admit your family is like something out of a TV show.’
‘So’s mine,’ Paige said. ‘EastEnders.’
Issey gave one of her honks of laughter that made everyone jump. ‘You’re funny!’ She pointed her beer bottle at Paige. ‘I didn’t think you were going to be funny!’
‘Why not?’ Paige asked.
‘Because you’re so …’ Issey dipped her head, looked up under her fringe, pouted. She was even pushing her small boobs together with her inner arms.
‘Jesus Christ,’ Paige said. ‘Seriously?’
Liane was crying with laughter. ‘Oh my god, Issey! You literally only just met her!’
‘I know!’ Issey said. ‘What’s wrong with that? Look at her!’
Liane wiped her eyes with the back of her hands, smearing some mascara onto her cheekbone. She stared seriously across the room at Paige. ‘She’s just gorgeous,’ she said. ‘That doesn’t mean she’s not funny. I thought I told you she was funny.’
‘That’s what I’m saying!’ Issey said. ‘I said she’s funny!’ She clambered up off the sofa, pushing Liane’s legs off hers. ‘And you didn’t say she was funny, you said she was in the shit and we should help her out.’
She half staggered out of the room, bumping into the small table at the end of the sofa and sending all the glasses rattling. ‘Just going to the loo,’ she told them.
‘Sorry about her,’ Liane told Paige. ‘She’s pissed.’
‘S’OK,’ Paige said. ‘I’m glad you asked me anyway.’
It wasn’t like she hadn’t known. It wasn’t as if she’d thought Liane was into her or anything. She’d known Liane had only asked her because Liane was a good person and so one day, after their seminar, when they’d walked to the library together – Liane to meet her friends in the cafe, Paige to stay warm, study, and pretend she’d eaten her lunch already – Paige had ended up telling her too much about her situation. Not everything, of course, but enough.
‘Sorry about that. Issey hasn’t got much of a brain-to-mouth filter,’ Ella said now.
Paige shook her head. ‘It’s fine. So … where are you from?’
‘I’m from Lancashire,’ Ella said. ‘Very small town.’
‘And your perfect family?’ Paige smiled.
‘They’re definitely not perfect,’ Ella said, smiling back. ‘My parents got divorced when I was six. Mum remarried and my stepdad is amazing. I’ve got a brother a year older and we’ve got a cat and that’s it. Boring.’
‘They play Scrabble when they go home,’ Lou said, draining a beer and pouring herself more tequila. ‘And they’ve got a family WhatsApp group. They all really like each other! It’s fucked up.’
‘That sounds great,’ Paige said.
‘It’s not bad,’ Ella said, smiling.
‘I always wanted a brother,’ Paige said.
‘You an only child?’ Lou said. ‘Me too. Sucks. Dylan’s, like, Ella’s best friend.’
‘Yeah?’ Paige said, opening another beer.
‘We’re pretty close, yeah,’ Ella said.
‘Once,’ Lou said, crossing the room to the terrace, pulling a cigarette packet out from the pocket of her dungarees. ‘Once when she was drunk, Ella said he was her favourite person in the world. Imagine that.’
‘Piss off,’ Ella said, laughing.
‘Before that, I thought I was her favourite person in the world. But no. It’s her actual brother. How wholesome.’
Ella rolled her eyes and Paige smiled at her. It sounded lovely. She couldn’t even imagine it.
They moved out onto the roof terrace when the beer ran out. The navy sky was dotted with stars, the air surprisingly warm. Laughter and shouting drifted up to them from the street below. They’d brought pillows and duvets out with them, and were passing the tequila round now, swigging it from the bottle. Paige loved it way more than she’d expected to.
‘No relationships for me this year,’ Ella said when Liane had finished telling them about the boy she’d seen on the train who’d given her a ‘significant look’. ‘All work all the time,’ Ella added.
‘You can’t work all the time,’ Lou said. ‘That’s unrealistic.’
‘Well …’ Ella said. She leaned forward to grab some Doritos, but tipped over, ending up with her head in Paige’s lap. ‘Sorree,’ she giggled.
Paige shrugged and helped her back to upright, pushing the crisps closer.
‘I’m still going to have fun with you guys,’ Ella said. ‘But I don’t need the distraction of a boy!’
‘They are distracting,’ Issey said. She was curled up under her duvet like a dog, only the top of her hair visible.
‘Well, I’m not giving up boys. Men,’ Liane said. ‘No fucking way.’
‘I’m not giving them up either,’ Ella said. ‘Just … no relationships. I can do … casual.’
‘You?’ Lou said. ‘You can do casual?’
‘I can!’ Ella said.
‘Oh, I’m sure,’ Lou said, standing up and lighting a cigarette. ‘It’s just, you know, you never have.’
‘I have!’ Ella said, shifting so she was kneeling up and looking over at Lou. ‘That guy in that bar that time.’
‘Oh, yeah,’ Lou said. ‘I remember him.’ She grinned.
‘What guy in what bar what time?’ Issey said, crawling out of her duvet.
‘I can’t remember the bar. But the guy was doing a survey? And he came over and started talking to us. Me and Lou. And he asked me to dance. And I danced with him. And then I went home with him!’
‘And what happened when you went home with him?’ Lou said, blowing a stream of smoke out over the street.
‘We fell asleep,’ Ella said.
‘And in the morning?’
‘I left.’
‘That does not count,’ Lou said.
‘It so does!’ Ella said, sitting back down and taking the tequila from Paige. ‘I went home with someone I’d just met! It counts! Doesn’t it?’
‘I don’t think it does,’ Liane said. ‘Not if you didn’t have sex. Did you do anything? Blowie? Handy? Anything?’
‘No,’ Ella said, pouting.
‘Doesn’t count,’ Issey said. ‘Sorry.’
Ella sighed. ‘Well, excuse me if I don’t want to just shag random guys I meet in clubs!’
‘That’s what I’m saying,’ Lou said, sitting down next to Ella and wrapping both arms around her. ‘You don’t do casual.’
‘I could,’ Ella said. ‘I could if I wanted to.’
‘What about you?’ Liane asked Lou. ‘Have you heard from Kyle?’
Lou shook her head. ‘Nope. And I don’t want to either.’
‘You’re done?’ Liane asked her. ‘Really?’
‘Definitely,’ Lou said. ‘This will be a Kyle-free year.’
The five of them sat in silence for a little while, Ella staring up at the stars, Paige scrolling her phone, Issey trying to crawl inside her duvet cover. Liane had her eyes closed and may actually have been asleep. She always fell asleep easily when she got drunk.
‘I think this is going to be amazing,’ Lou said. ‘The five of us. Living here.’