Epilogue
The early fall sun felt warm and comforting on my face and the soft grass was cool and tender beneath my bare feet as I ran around in small, slow circles pretending that I was putting everything that I could into escaping from the tiny, and impossibly beautiful toddlers who were chasing me. At just over a year-and-a-half old my twins still seemed so much like babies, and yet every day brought new independence and strength and skill that brought them further and further away from those sweet little newborns that I had cradled in my arms. It at once felt like it it was only a matter of days ago when I still held them in my belly and then brought them into the world so that I could look into their little faces and cuddle them to me, and like there had never been a time in my life when they weren't there. There had been no major adjustment into motherhood. I felt like I was taking on a role that I had always been intended to have, and as naturally as I fell into mothering both children, the four brothers became immediate and devoted fathers. I felt like it wasn't possible that they could be as big as they already were, but I loved watching them grow and change and learn. Each of them was incredibly distinct, their personalities already clear and evident, and I always looked forward to what new personality trait or preference or talent I was going to discover. There were many days that I spent envisioning the future that I would have with these beautiful tiny human beings. I felt wonderfully blessed to be their mother and hoped that I would be able to do everything that I could to help them become their best versions of themselves.
That day, however, was not just about the babies. Though they were delighting themselves in digging their bare toes into the grass and giggling as they chased one another, and I was enjoying every moment of chasing them around, my mind was still in the ceremony that we had just experienced. I felt nearly euphoric with happiness and wanted to relive those moments over and over again. Just as both of the babies wore sweet white clothing, I ran through the grass in a long white cotton sundress. It just bordered on still being appropriate considering the season, but the temperature was warm enough that the sun kissing my bare shoulders was enough to keep away the slightly crisp breeze when it brushed over us. That breeze had been with us when we were standing in front of a small gathering of family members and friends, two brothers on either side of me as we spoke words of love and commitment and joy.
We knew that we wouldn't be able to get married. Even if we had been able to, I didn't know if that was the decision that would have been right for us. But the passionate and consuming love that we had for one another deserved more than just acknowledgement to each other every day and confirmation and celebration every night. We deserved to speak those words to one another, to proclaim them in front of those who matter to us the most. Our commitment to one another as a family was powerful and unshakable, but it had been deeply touching and meaningful to look into their eyes and confirm it in a way that seemed both tangible and ethereal. I had just reached for Haddon when I felt strong arms wrapped around my waist and pick me up from behind. My son squealed with delight at having escaped my grasp yet again and scurried away, only to be swept up off of the ground by Aiden. Lily forgot all about the game and ran directly into Lucas's arms. I turned my head and kissed Talon.
"I caught you," he said.
"I see that," I said.
I felt myself get pulled through the air into another set of arms and I turned to kiss Jackson.
"And I stole you," he said.
I laughed and watched as the two men carried the little ones toward the large tent set up across the field. Our guests were waiting for us inside to continue the celebration of our commitment, but I wasn't eager to go in. As much as I appreciated that they were all there for me and the energy and love that they all shared with us, part of me wanted to be selfish. I wanted to savor these moments just with the brothers and our children. After the party was over, we would spend another night together and then we would drop the twins off with my parents and go on a honeymoon together. Though the twins adored spending time with their grandparents and I was extremely excited at the prospect of spending a few days completely wrapped up and focusing on my partners, I was nervous. I hadn't been away from them for this long yet and I didn't know if I was ready.
"You're thinking about it again, aren't you?" Talon asked.
"I know that they're going to have a wonderful time" I said.
"We are going to have a wonderful time," Jackson said. "I can't wait to show you the lodge."
He leaned forward and nuzzled into my neck, touching his lips to my skin and sending the familiar spark of desire through me.
"Isn't it going to be really cold up there?" I asked.
"Well," Talon said. "Skiing is generally done better in a cold environment."
"You know how easily I get cold," I said.
"Then I guess we're just going to have to keep you warm," Jackson said.
They had no trouble at all keeping me warm, even as the temperatures around the lodge dropped. As the snow fell outside the window, my primed, softened body stretched across a plush white rug in the warm glow of a fire. I ached for more of their touch, but they were taking their time, exploring me with careful, torturous thoroughness. Jackson and Lucas were on either side of me, each running their fingertips down from my shoulders along my arms and onto my hands. Their touch was soft and feathery as they stroked along my palms and down my fingers before bringing their fingers back up and repeating the gesture, slightly turning my arms so that they created new paths down my skin.
My head rested in Talon's lap and his hands lightly cupped my breasts. He kneaded into them, massaging them so that my hardening nipples pressed into his palms. After a few moments he released the pressure and mimicked the softer touch of his brothers, tracing his fingertips around my nipples and then drawing them up my chest and along my collarbones. His fingers rested over the soft dip between them for a few brief moments as he seemed to focus completely on my heartbeat just beneath my skin, then ran up along the sides of my neck to the tender, rarely-touched place just beneath my ears.
At this point, Aiden joined in from where he sat on his knees by my feet. He reached forward and rested his fingertips to my hip bones, leaving them there for a few moments to create the connection between us. His fingers ran along each bone before dipping down into the valley between them. My belly was slightly rounded there, softer now than it had been just two years before. I knew that it would never be the same, and I wouldn't change it. That softness was a testament to the beautiful, remarkable children that had grown within me, created through a consuming love more powerful than anything I could have dreamed. My body was no longer just my own. It belonged to them, was marked and claimed by them, and altered by the reality of our children. I was proud of every change, every way that I was unlike the woman I had been before Jackson stepped into my shop and my world opened. And yet, in the center of my very being, I still was that woman, because I was always meant to be with them, always intended to be theirs, and being with them hadn't turned me into someone else, it had enhanced my true self and allowed me to discover more.
The brush of Aiden's fingertips moved over my belly and down to the juncture of my hips and thighs. The skin there was incredibly sensitive and my body began to tremble slightly when he touched me. I felt my muscles relaxing and my hips falling open, my body seeking more of the touch of each of these men. Aiden obliged, bringing his fingertips down the crease and onto the tender skin of my inner thighs. His touch ran along my legs until he reached my ankles, and then slid onto my feet. His fingers stroked over the arch and then returned to my legs. When he reached my knees, he pressed on them, easing my legs apart. Aiden slid forward so that he was kneeling in between my legs and I finally felt his touch on my wet core.
Their slow touch had made me aware of every inch of my body and I felt like my skin was tingling, buzzing from the electricity of the bond that we shared and the power of their touch over me. My body was hot and soft, slick in preparation for them, and Aiden found that slickness, gathering some onto his fingertips and using it to make them glide through my petals. Just as they had explored the rest of my skin, he explored me now, delving into every intimate fold and discovering my most sensitive curves and dips. The pressure of his touch increased slightly and he dipped his fingers inside me briefly to gather more of my fluids before bringing them to my sensitive peak. The bundle of nerves had slipped from beneath its protective hood, emerging in response to their coaxing, and eager for the attention that they were offering.
I gasped at the shock of sensation as Aiden stroked his finger across my clit. My body had been so awakened, so intently nurtured by them that even that one single touch had pushed me close to the edge of my control. My hands tightened, capturing Jackson and Lucas's hands in mine, and I arched my head back against Talon. I could feel his erection hardening beneath me and his breath quickening, causing his hard, muscled belly to press against my head rhythmically. Each of the men on either side of me placed my hands on the floor and leaned forward to capture my nipples in their mouths. Their hot tongues swirled around my taut buds, flicking occasionally to keep the sensations rolling through me. Aiden touched me further, pressing slightly as he created a circular pattern. He touched me this way until I felt like I was nearing the edge of oblivion, then the intensity lessened as he took his finger away. The reprieve allowed me to focus on the eager mouths on my breasts and the feeling of Aiden taking me by the hips and lifting them so that they rested on his lap. He draped my legs on either side of him and suddenly he filled me.
Talon lifted my head and adjusted its position so that it rested on one of his thighs. I turned and discovered his luscious erection waiting for me. His hand slid up and down it slowly and I hungrily replaced his touch with my mouth. I kept my eyes open, allowing myself to watch as Lucas wrapped one free hand around his own surging cock and started to stroke it. I slipped my hand to the side until it touched Jackson's thigh and I felt him pick it up and wrap it around his shaft. Watching Lucas stroke himself, I moved my hand along Jackson and my mouth along Talon at the same rhythm. My hips rocked subtly to meet the pattern and soon the thrust of Aiden's hips fell into step, his thick cock gliding along my walls at the same pace. His mouth lowered toward my body and I felt his breath touching my belly as he licked a bead of sweat from my skin. We celebrated each other, worshipped each other, and created a tightly woven knot that nothing could unravel.
Aiden's tongue flicked across my peak and almost instantly I felt my body tighten. My back arched and I cried out with the strength of the climax that rushed through me, the sound muffled by Talon pushing his hips forward, plunging into my throat as he throbbed. I eagerly swallowed as he spilled into my mouth, filling myself with him. An instant later Aiden threw his head back and roared, his own orgasm meeting mine so that I pulled him deeply and cradled him tightly to me. I brought my hand up to replace Lucas's, pumping the brothers on either side of me until the room around me reverberated with their groans and gasps of pleasure. Soon my breasts and stomach wore their hot silvery strands and I moaned happily, losing myself in the euphoria of them.
As I slipped into a bath in the deep garden tub of the master bathroom a few minutes later, I felt like the world outside of our existence together had disappeared. These four luscious men and the amazing babies that they gave me were everything that I had searched for even when I hadn't known that I was searching, everything that I had needed even when I thought that I needed nothing. They were my true sweetness in life.
THE END