Thirteen
Ava
I enjoyed being at Travis’ cabin. He was interesting to talk to and a comfort to be around. I felt like I could be myself and make my own decisions without him judging me for them. We ate breakfast together in silence as I studied him, and every once in awhile his eye could catch mine. I enjoyed the way he made me feel. His eyes would rake down my body when he thought I wasn’t looking, pulling from me a desire I hadn’t ever felt before. The pleasure he had washed over my body last night had taken my breath away, but it also started my mind whirling with thoughts.
Him making me communicate to him about what I wanted got me thinking about other things I wanted. From life, from myself, and from my family. I knew I needed to get away from them, but I didn’t really want to. I would miss my brothers too much, but I had somehow convinced myself that my only course of action was to run. I had other roads. I could stand up to my father and tell him what I thought. I could tell him what I was going to do with my life instead of caving to his every notion. I could make a life for myself that still had my brothers in it instead of casting them aside as I fled to California.
Plus, I had no idea what I would do when I got to California. I had no formal education and no knowledge of the culture there. I didn’t know what kind of people lived there or what kind of company I could build for myself. But there was one company I was knowledgeable about. One company I had grown up around my entire life. There was one company I knew I could have input in. One I could help.
One I was born into.
“Whatcha thinking about?” Travis asked.
“Honestly? I’m thinking about standing up to my father,” I said.
“That’s a pretty hefty goal from what you’ve told me about him in passing.”
“I know, but the road I’m on now really isn’t one I want to be on,” I said.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“My car is packed full of stuff. I’ve got this envelope of money my brothers gave me so I could finally get myself to California. But, I don’t really want to be in California.”
“Then don’t go.”
“Exactly. But then I had to ask myself what I really wanted. You know, like you did last night.”
I felt Travis’ eyes on me as my cheeks flushed underneath his gaze.
“What is it that you want?” he asked.
“I want to contribute something to the world. I want to do something good. But I don’t want to do it without my brothers. I draw my strength from them, and the farther away I get from them, the weaker and more vulnerable I feel. And maybe that’s not a good thing. But for now, I can identify that about myself. And that’s big for me.”
“It’s big for anyone, becoming that self-aware,” he said.
“But having my brothers in my life means going back home and standing up to my father. Telling him I’m not taking his shit anymore.”
“Are you going to be okay doing that?” he asked.
“I mean even if I wasn’t, what am I gonna do? That’s the only course of action I’ve got right now.”
I turned my gaze over to Travis and studied his face. He was thinking about something. I could see it rolling around behind his eyes. I waited patiently on the couch for him to say something about it. For him to mention what it was he was gathering his thoughts on.
But instead, he only nodded his head.
“Well, if things go south, you know where I am,” Travis said.
“Yeah. I do.”
“Are you going back today?” he asked.
“No reason in putting off the inevitable. No matter how long I wait, it’s going to start a firefight.”
“Just stay safe. Okay? That’s important.”
“I will. I promise.”
I took a quick shower and changed my clothes, then watched as Travis’ body receded in the background. Having that night with him last night gave me a strength I had been waiting to possess. His body and his lips instilled within me a confidence I had yet to explore within myself. I was a little closer to establishing what I wanted for my life, with no help at all from my father, and now it was time to put my foot down.
The only control he had over me was the control I had willingly given him for the last twenty two years of my life.
I barreled up the driveway and saw my brothers in the yard. Their faces paled as they ran toward me, their arms flagging me down. Hunter had this surprised expression on his face as he opened my door, but Lorenzo interjected before Hunter could say anything.
“What the hell are you doing here? Father’s fucking pissed.”
“Why did you come back?” Finn said. “We gave you the money you needed.”
“Why don’t you give her space and let her explain,” Hunter said.
“I can’t leave you guys,” I said. “I thought that getting away from Dad was the solution, but it’s not. I want my brothers in my life. Which means I had to come back here. I can’t take you guys with me, but I can try to stand up to Dad.”
“This isn’t going to end well,” Finn said.
“We can’t cover your ass this time,” Lorenzo said.
“Don’t worry. You don’t have to. Just walk with me inside,” I said.
The four of us entered the house and my mother rushed to my side. She wrapped her arms around me, holding me close as she cried into my hair. She covered me in kisses as I stood there, my brothers all watching from the foyer.
Then, my father came around the corner with his face red with anger.
“Where the hell did you go?” my father asked. “And don’t tell me Cassie’s. Because I went there myself this morning!”
“I didn’t go to Cassie’s,” I said. “I was on my way to California.”
I heard my brothers groan in the corner as my father shot them a look.
“You were going where?” my mother asked.
“California,” I said.
“And why the hell did you think you could just run off to California?” my father asked.
“Something could have happened to you!” my mother exclaimed. “You could’ve been in a car accident. Or taken! Your father’s a wealthy and important man. Someone could’ve held you hostage somewhere!”
“You watch too many soap operas, Mom,” I said.
“You will not speak to your mother that way,” my father said. “She has earned your respect for trying to raise you to be a proper woman despite your insolent behavior!”
“I am my own woman and I can do as I please,” I said.
My brothers gawked from the corner as my father clenched his fists. He was two seconds away from slugging me just to get me to shut up, but I didn’t care. My mother’s face was stunned into silence and I could feel my chest puffing out with confidence. I had said it, and now the cork had been popped.
“You have tried to get me to subscribe to a life I don’t believe in,” I said. “A life I’m not fit to live. I don’t want to be someone’s trophy wife like Mom decided to be with you. I want to be educated on things. Like politics and finances and sex.”
“Did she just say sex?” Hunter asked.
“Wait for it. Dad’s head is literally going to blow through the roof,” Lorenzo said.
“If he hits her again, it’s done. I’m not going to stand by and watch him do that again,” Finn said.
“I’m sorry I worried you, but I hope I proved my point. Dad, I’m not marrying anyone. I’m not going on anymore of your dates. You’re not going to sell my virginity off to the highest bidder. That is mine to give to whomever I choose,” I said.
“Is that where you were last night?” my father asked. “Did you spread your legs like some whore for someone?”
“Honey,” my mother said. “Calm down.”
“Shut up, woman. You weren’t harsh enough on our daughter, and now look at where it’s gotten us! We did it your way for twenty-two years. Now, we’re going to do it my way,” my father said.
“Sweetheart, please. She’s just a girl. She won’t respond to the way you raised the boys!”
I watched my father cock his hand back and I braced myself for the impact. But instead of feeling his hand crack against my skin, I heard a thud as people surrounded me. I opened my eyes and saw Finn in front of me, his hand wrapped around my father’s wrist. Lorenzo and Hunter blanketed me with their bodies, shielding me from the impact if Finn’s barrier didn’t work.
“What the hell is all of this?” my father asked.
“I will not stand by and watch you hit the women of this family any longer,” Finn said. “The only thing your daughter is telling you is that she wants to live her own life. Like we get to, in a way. She wants to make her own decisions, and her first decision is that she doesn’t want to get married. And we support her in that.”
“Sit your ass down, you ignorant child,” my father said. “You leave your sister to me.”
“Actually, I don’t think we’re going to do that,” Lorenzo said. “Because we were the ones that tried to help her get away.”
“What?” my mother asked.
“Yep. We gave her some money so she could get herself to California,” Hunter said. “Though I have to admit, coming back here was gutsy. I’m proud of you, Ava.”
“Thanks,” I said with a smile.
“What the hell is going on?” my father asked.
“What’s going on is the fact that your children aren’t taking anymore of your shit,” I said.
“You watch that mouth, young lady. Or you won’t see the sun for a month!”
“You don’t have control anymore over this situation,” I said. “Stop it, Daddy.”
I watched him falter for just a moment before his hand came down at his side. He looked weary. War torn. Very unlike the strong man I grew up with. Now, he seemed weak. Vulnerable. All of those things he tried to teach us not to be. All of those times I heard him beat my brothers’ asses for pulling stupid shit and all those times my mother shielded me from his anger.
It brought us all to this point. Where the four of us stood against our parents.
“I will not tolerate this. I still have control of your trust funds, boys,” my father said.
“I don’t have one so, you guys have a rebuttal for that?” I asked.
“One, we think you should have a trust fund. That’s a load of shit,” Hunter said.
“Two, we’re hoping if you stand your ground on this marriage thing, then maybe we can marry people we love as well,” Lorenzo said.
“What?” I asked.
“Yeah. It’s different for women, obviously. But men get married off, too,” Finn said. “Dad tried to do it to me a couple of years ago, but things fell through. Mostly because Lorenzo sabotaged the efforts.”
“You what?” my father asked.
“I did. Trickled some lies through our group that got back to Dad. Had to do some serious damage control, though. It almost ruined that young woman’s reputation,” Lorenzo said. “She was a great lay after, though.”
“You slept with her? Nice,” Hunter said.
The two of them clapped hands above my head as I stood there, rooted in shock. This was why my brothers were always so encouraging of my insane ideas. This was why they always helped me out whenever I needed to get away and breathe. Our father tried to control them as much as he tried to control me.
I had no idea he did that to them.
“This is absurd!” my father said with a roar. “I will not have my children wandering about like a lost herd of buffalo! You ungrateful, small-minded toddlers. Everything I built was to hand down to you guys. All of this wealth. This house and your educations—”
“Well, their educations,” I said. “I didn’t get one.”
“You will listen to me!” my father roared.
“I will not!” I said. “I will not stand here and continue to be berated. And now that I understand that my brothers are just as unhappy, I will not stand here and allow you to wreak havoc on their lives either. You have a choice, Dad. You can give us the freedom to discover our own lives and have us around, or you can cast us out and be done with it. But I can promise you this. I’m sure the media would love to know exactly how you treat your family on a regular basis. I bet that wouldn’t bode too well for what you built to pass down to us, would it?”
My fists were clenched at my side as my brothers stood around me. Our eyes were trained on our father as he loomed over us. He seemed taller than normal. Darker and angrier than I had ever seen him. My knees shook, but I couldn’t show him weakness. Businessmen like my father thrived on weakness. The moment I showed it, he had the upper hand and there was no getting it back.
I looked into his eyes as my mother shed tears behind him. My heart leapt out for her. I loved my mother, I really did. But the life she had chosen for herself was one that had been imposed on her. She was as happy as she portrayed herself to be, but that was it. No one could ever be able to convince me that this was the life she would’ve chosen had someone stood up for her. Stood beside her, like my brothers did for me.
“Get out of my sight,” my father said. “We’ll discuss this later. Like civil adults.”
I sighed as a smile crossed my face.
“But if you think the three of you are getting any slice of anything I’ve left for you after this blatant portrayal of disrespect, then you are sorely mistaken,” my father said.
“We can discuss it later,” I said. “Like civil adults.”