Clayton
“You just planning on pouting around here all day?” I lifted my head and found Corbin standing in the doorway of my room. “Don’t you think you need to talk to her or, hell I don’t know, maybe take a shower?”
“Close the door.” I placed my arm back over my eyes to shield the sunlight. It hurt, everything hurt. Apparently I got so drunk last night, the guys had convinced me I knew how to breakdance. Let me just clarify that I do not, in fact, know how to breakdance.
“It’s been more than forty-eight hours, Clayton.” My brother didn’t seem to get the message. “She’s called a million times and texted.”
“Do you have a point?”
“Yeah, you need to listen to the fucking messages and read the damn texts.” I found myself rolling my eyes much like Palmer and Emelie often did in reference to one another. Which of course only seemed to inflict another round of an entirely different type of ache inside of me.
“Close the door, asshole,” I mumbled as I rolled to my side and pulled the pillow over my head. “She needs to figure out on her own what or who she wants. It’s not my choice.”
“I want you.” I remained still, convincing myself that at this point I had to be hearing shit that wasn’t being said. “There’s never been a second of doubt in my mind.”
Slowly, I pushed back the pillow, and after blinking a time or two, Emelie came into view. Her hair was a fucking mess, like it hadn’t been brushed, half of it falling out of the ponytail she’d obviously once had. She wore the pajama pants I’d seen her wear so many times before, blue with little yellow stars all over them.
“How could you even for a second think that I would want him? That what I feel for you could ever be erased by anyone?” I stared at her, seeing her throat bob as she swallowed hard.
“I love you, Clay, so much that at times I feel like if I lost you, I would lose myself in the process.” She took a step toward me and I watched my brother out of the corner of my eye pull the door shut, leaving the two of us alone. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about him being here, but I guess in a way I thought if I ignored it long enough the entire thing would disappear. I wanted it to just go away. It was never because I felt unsettled or unsure.”
Emelie moved around the side of the bed and crawled up next to me, sitting back onto her legs that were tucked beneath her.
“Do you know that you were the first person besides Palmer that ever made me feel like being imperfect was okay?”
“You are perfect,” I said, remaining perfectly still though I really wanted to reach out and pull her body to mine. She closed her eyes for a moment as if to accept that I felt this way, because I know she battled with her insecurities daily.
“The only reason I pushed you away so much in the beginning is because I knew having you in my life would change everything. I knew that not falling for you would be impossible. From the first moment you held Ethan and showed him more attention than his own father had, I understood just how special you were.”
Tears pooled in Emelie’s eyes, making it harder for me to hold back.
“You are the only man I want, Clayton.” Her voice cracked with emotion. “I love you so deeply and so strongly that it’s crippling. I don’t wanna lose you.”
I couldn’t hold back any longer, as I lifted my upper body off the bed and wrapped my arms around her.
“I just wanna fix this,” she cried into the crease of my neck and I held her tighter. “I should have told you, and I’m sorry.”
“Shh.” I tried to calm her, but she only cried harder.
“I understand why you were upset, but you have to know that it never was about second-guessing my choices. I need you.” Emelie fisted my shirt in her hands.
“You have me.” Assuring her was all I could do.
We stayed like that for I don’t even know how long, until I pulled her further onto the bed and held her in my arms. She still had not yet looked at me, only remained tucked in close to me, like letting me go meant we’d go back to the way things were over the last couple of days. It was almost like a fear in her, one that made her desperate to keep me close.
“Did you know that after I graduated, I’d always intended on going back to Morehead? It was a given because my family’s there.” I soothingly rubbed her back as she finally looked up at me. “But now I know that wherever you are is where I wanna be. Because you and Ethan are my family now.”
She shook her head.
“I want you to follow through with those dreams.” When I attempted to argue she placed her finger to my lips to stop me. “Yes…” I pressed my forehead to hers. “…with only one request.”
“What’s that?” I said, her finger still pushed against my lips.
“Can we come with you?”
My heart felt like it leaped, slammed against my chest cavity. “There is no way in hell I’d ever go anywhere without either of you.”